Its no coincidence that its her night off. I needed to talk to her someway, somehow. Just me and her in a place she'd be comfortable in. So as Dorothy and her dog Toto goes, 'there's no place like home'.
I've debated over and over again on how should I do this. And I get no straight answer for myself.
Even the drive to her place was torturous. I've circled her block a couple of times before I decided to park three houses away.
Call me insecure. At the moment I am.
If she rejects me, at least I'll know and I've tried. Will hurt for awhile but I guess the pain will never really go away. If she doesn't reject me… well, I actually haven't thought that far yet.
Everything in my body heavily leans on the negative side.
Its 7:30 now. Geez, I've been sitting in my car for almost two hours. Its now or never.
Sara has been harping me to ask her out for a date. I've never had problems asking girls out. But this is Catherine Willows. I cant go up to her and say, 'yo, Cath, wanna go out?' No. this is Catherine. I need proper planning. I need to think this through. I've never been serious about something like this before.
And I need to go before I spend another hour in my car. See the predicament I'm in?
---oOo---
She opens the door, surprised to see me.
God, she looks so beautiful. Her hair tied up with some strands falling over her forehead, wearing a black body hugging tee, jeans and barefoot.
Barefoot yet, damn. She is so hot and sexy.
"Greg," she looks at me surprised. "what are you doing here?"
"Ummm, hey, Catherine. I was, uh, visiting someone around your area and thought of dropping by to say 'hey.' I cant even keep eye contact with her!
"So, uh.. 'hey', Cath." I give her a lying smile, digging my hands in my back pockets. Geez, pathetic.
She looks at me and her smile widens, "Greg, that's one of the lamest lies I've heard. Come on in."
Hey, at least I tried.
I come in and close the door behind me. I watch Catherine walk to her living room. So casual, so relaxed. This is her in her home, stress free. Walking barefoot in her home. No make up but yet ever so beautiful.
Her home so quiet."Is Lindsey asleep now?"I asked.
Last time I was here it was a barbeque party. I was giving a squealling Lindsey piggyback rides while Catherine, Nick, Warrick and Sara looked on laughing. I remember clearly the beaming look on Catherine's face as she watched her daughter laugh and have fun. It was funny because I spent most of the night entertaining and talking to the little Willows.Not that I mind but I enjoyed our conversations. She is a very sharp girl, just like Catherine.
Eventually she fell asleep on the couch, exhausted. I went to the patio and whispered to Catherine. She came in with me and was about to pick up the little girl when I said, "I'll carry her up, Cath"
She smiled, "Lindsay really loves it when you come over. She totally adores you. And I really love seeing her laugh and have fun. You're a good guy, Greg. Thank you"
I carried Lindsey to her room. Catherine tuckes her in bed. The little girl sleepily opens her eyes and says, "I love you, mommy"
Catherine leans down and kisses her daughters forehead and whispers, "I love you forever, Linds."
My thoughts were broken when she answered, "she's sleeping over at Nancy's. Something about this new video game she and Jeremy are playing.
"Have a seat , Greg. You want something to drink? I got beer, soda, tea, none of your Hawaiian coffee though…" she trails off, turns her head and smiles at me, waiting for my reply.
God, she's lovely.
"Uh, you got milk?"
She turns around looks at me with her brows creasing. "Milk, Greg?"
I know, I know. I do need something stronger. Vodka, gin, scotch…
Still looking at me. Again she questions, "milk, Greg? You're joking, right?"
I sit down on her sofa taking a deep breath and letting it out. "Well, you know what they say in the ads, 'milk, it does a body good," I said smiling at her.
She laughs as she walks to the kitchen and opens the fridge, "you don't need more milk, Greg. You already do have a great body."
Oh, god. She notices my body. Wow. What a revelation! I gotta wipe this silly grin on my face before she comes back. What a tease!
She comes out from the kitchen holding two beer bottles. She hands it to me and plops down on the sofa next to me. I'm guessing she's 14 to 16 inches away. I can smell her perfume. Yeah, that's close enough.
We both take a swig . Okay, silence between us. An awkward moment. Both of us now staring at our beer bottles like it's the first time we've seen it.
This is uncomfortable. I take another deep breath and let it out slowly.
I look at her and she was looking at me.
"So.."
"So.."
We laugh because we said it simultaneously. Good. A little bit of the ice chipped off.
"You go first, Greg." she points at me.
"Nah, you go first, Cath." I point back at her smiling.
She chuckles softly, "you came here for a reason, so you go first."
I laugh. "Chivalry is not dead . Lady's first." I do a mock bow and raise my bottle.
She sighs, leans forward as she picks up her bottle from the center table and continues to smile while still looking at me, "you're something else, Greg, you know that right?"
"I know. I'm on a class of my own. That's why I'm good looking, talented, adorable and lovable." I take my arm and lean it on the back of the couch, my hand just inches away from her neck. I could feel a few lost strands of hair tickling the top my hand.
"Ahh, you forgot sweet and humble." Still smiling as she leans back, my hand now touching her neck. I can feel the warmth of her neck sending shivers down my spine.
I'm sitting inches away next to a woman I'm attracted to. I don't know if I can control myself from leaning over and kissing her. My breathing quickens. I know I should take my hand out to kind of control this feeling but I cant.
My hand has a mind of its own. My fingers move and I slowly and gently massage Catherine's neck. The woman slowly closes her eyes and tilts her head downward.
"Ohh, that feels good, Greg." she mumbles.
I close my eyes. And I try to breathe.
Dear God, I think I'm dying. Please don't take me yet.
Please…