Disclaimer: Don't own. Just playing.

Warning:Mild language.

AN: Thanks so much for the great reviews! I know this story is pretty depressing...it'll get happier. I just love angst so much. :) Hope you're enjoying it anyway, and thanks for reading!

Convincing

Chapter 3 – Should Be

When Hyde walked into the kitchen, he saw Mrs. Forman and Jackie sitting at the kitchen table. Jackie looked upset, and his stomach tightened. "Hey," he said, walking past the fridge and the stove to stand near the counter, all the while staring at his girlfriend. "What are you doing here? I was just leaving to pick you up."

Jackie hoped to God that her face wasn't all splotchy from her tears, and she sat up straight, furrowing her brow in confusion. "Pick me up for what?" She watched Mrs. Forman stand up and walk past Steven to the cabinets where she pretended to be busy.

Hyde frowned. "We're going to a movie. I asked you this morning if you wanted to go." He paused; Jackie's face was completely blank. "You said you did."

For the life of her, Jackie couldn't remember him asking her to a movie, but she decided to play along with him. "Oh, god, I forgot," she said. He looked at her expectantly, and she suddenly felt nervous. She couldn't go with him. Not tonight. Not feeling like she did right now. She'd probably end up crying, then he'd ask her why she was crying, she'd tell him, he'd freak out and change his mind about being with her. She jerked up out of the chair, nearly knocking it over in the process. "I..uh..I c..ca..cl…can't, Steven," she stammered. "I'm…I have to…uh…I'll just see you later."

Hyde watched her hurry out the sliding doors in utter confusion. What in the hell had just happened? He glanced at Mrs. Forman, who nodded her head towards the doors, and with a sigh, he followed Jackie outside. He quickly caught up to her before she reached her car, and he grabbed her wrist. "Hey, Jackie," he said. She turned around, and he could tell she'd been crying. His hand moved from her wrist to her hand. "What's going on? You don't want to go?"

Jackie looked down at the ground. "I just don't feel like watching a movie." Dumb excuse, but hey. Maybe it would work.

Hyde moved closer to him and put his free arm around her waist, pulling her to him. He grinned. "Fine. We won't watch." Hell, that idea suited him just find. Maybe a little heavy making out at the drive in, then they could go back to her apartment and go further. Finally. God, it seemed like whenever they were just about to, something would happen, a phone call, Fez or Kelso interrupting, a headache. Or she would just fall asleep. Not tonight, if he had anything to say about it. And he might as well start the seduction right now. He leaned down and sensually kissed her cheek, then nibbled his way down to her neck. Mmmm…yeah, he liked kissing her. Yeah, he loved kissing her.

Jackie's eyes closed and she arched her neck, smiling slightly from the pleasure of Steven's kisses. Slightly damp, so very warm, little flickers of his tongue; she could feel her knees buckling.

But that familiar pain in her head opened her eyes and twisted her face into a wince. Even Steven's kisses couldn't cure it, and she pushed him away. He looked at her, obviously annoyed, and she teared up. "I just…I don't want to go anywhere."

Hyde sighed heavily. "Then we'll just hang out here." This was so irritating. Normally Jackie begged him to take her out, and when he did ask her to go out, she all of a sudden didn't want to go?

"No. I just…I want to be alone tonight." Jackie swallowed hard. She didn't. She desperately wanted to be with Steven. She wanted him to hold her the way he had been lately, and yet, she couldn't. She couldn't risk it. If she was with him tonight, she'd tell him. And he'd leave her. Her heart ached as Steven's face masked over with Zen. Not everyone could tell the difference between his Zen because I'm bored and feel like being difficult and his Zen because something is really bothering me, but she could.

And this was definitely the latter. She felt incredibly guilty, but she couldn't change her mind. She couldn't. The risk was too high.

Hyde blinked slowly. "Fine. Whatever," he muttered. If she wanted to be alone, he'd let her. Hell, he didn't really want to spend the evening with her anyway. There were a million other things he'd rather do.

Right.

Jackie opened her mouth to say something, but only a choking sound came out. Mortified, she turned and walked away, tripping slightly but catching herself before she fell on her face.

Hyde watched her stumble away, and he rubbed his lips together with his left hand.

Something is really, really wrong.

His eyes closed. That thought was getting more and more intense the more he saw Jackie and the less like herself she acted.

"Damn it," he mumbled, opening his eyes and staring off in the direction Jackie had gone. God, what the hell? Why was Jackie, normally one who wanted to talk about everything, suddenly clamming up?

And why did it bother him so much?

Because you're worried about her. And you love her.

He turned and walked into the Forman kitchen, where Mrs. Forman was busy preparing to cook dinner. Mrs. Forman. Maybe she would know. After all, Jackie had been talking to her. Maybe confiding in her what was going on. "Mrs. Forman," he asked, moving towards the breakfast bar. "Why was Jackie here?"

Mrs. Forman glanced over at him. "Oh, she just wanted to chat a little bit," she said, hoping that her lie sounded remotely believable.

"About what?"

She laughed nervously and walked from the refrigerator to the stove. "Just girl talk, Steven. Nothing you'd be interested in."

Hyde knew Mrs. Forman was lying. She always got nervous and giggly when she was lying. "Did she tell you what's going on with her by any chance?"

Again, the nervous laugh. "What? No, Steven. She just wanted to…say hi."

That convinced him that Mrs. Forman knew what Jackie was upset about, and he took off his glasses. His voice lowered slightly, and he prayed that no one else was around to hear what he was about to say. "Look, Mrs. Forman, I'm…I'm really…I'm starting to get worried about her." He swallowed hard over the lump in his throat. Yeah, he felt it, but damn it was hard to say out loud. "I just wanna know if…if I should be."

Kitty stopped what she was doing and looked at Steven. Oh, he did look worried, as worried as she'd ever seen him, and that melted her. He should know. After all, he was Jackie's boyfriend, and whether Jackie believed it or not, he would care. She sighed sadly. "I think you should be, Steven." He stared at her blankly, and she smiled warily. "Sit down."

Three hours later

Hyde sat in the El Camino, staring at the steering wheel. He'd been driving around for the past two hours, trying to figure out what to do and failing miserably. Now he was parked in front of Jackie and Fez's apartment building, and he was wondering if he should go in.

He wanted to. After Mrs. Forman told him what she suspected was wrong with Jackie, he was more worried than ever. And completely unable to deal with what felt like ten thousand exploding grenades in his head. He wanted to see Jackie and to hear her voice. He wanted her to be normal. He wanted her to yell at him for something, anything at all. He wanted to listen to her chatter on and on about Donny Osmond or Abba or anything else that she loved and that drove him crazy.

He wanted to see her, for her to be okay, to act normal, so that he could believe that Mrs. Forman's suspicion was completely wrong.

Hyde shook his head and smiled bitterly. To think, Kelso and the others probably still thought she was pregnant. Hell, it would be so much easier if she was. At least he'd have some idea of the right thing to do. But this was different. So completely different. A baby didn't mean death. This could.

He should go in to see how she was. Even if she was sleeping, at least he'd know. And if she was awake, they could talk about what was going on. Of course, he had no clue what to say to her. He had no idea what she wanted to hear, and even if he did, chances were that he wouldn't be able to say it. When was he EVER able to say what she wanted to hear? Once every blue moon was his best guess.

He'd just let her down again, like when her father had gone to prison, and make her more upset. Probably why she hadn't come to him to begin with.

He sighed and looked down at his lap. He shouldn't go in. No point to it. Jackie obviously didn't want him to know what was going on, and he knew himself well enough to know he'd make a mess of it anyway. Better off just leaving. She'd be better without him right now.

And a small part of him couldn't help but think that maybe she'd be better off without him period.

Slowly, he pulled the El Camino onto the street and headed home. He felt a shaking sensation in the middle of his chest and frowned. He shouldn't feel guilty. Hell, she didn't WANT him with her. So really, he was just doing what she wanted.

Yeah, you keep telling yourself that.

Jackie's bedroom

Jackie lay in her bed, staring at the ceiling. She wanted to sleep, her entire body was sore with fatigue. But her mind wouldn't shut down. She couldn't stop thinking about the doctor's appointment the next day. What was the worst part was that she had no idea what could be wrong, what was going on with her own body. Was she going to die? Or just get so sick that she'd want to die?

And she was thinking about Steven, too. Before his face had gone Zen, she'd saw hurt in his eyes. He must have really wanted to be with her tonight. Of course he did. He loved her. A slight smile crossed her lips. He did love her. He'd told her that three more times since he'd said it after that whole Sam thing.

But her smile quickly faded.

If he really loved her, he should be here. He should be so worried that he couldn't rest until he made sure she was okay.

Right? Shouldn't it be that way? Shouldn't HE be that way?

But this was Steven. He never handled things the way they SHOULD be handled.

Jackie rolled over to her side, and she noticed the vase on her nightstand. The roses he'd given her were still in it, even though they were dead and flaking off now. She just couldn't bear to throw them away. He'd given them to her. STEVEN had given them to her.

She didn't care how he should be. She just wanted him. He could say or do whatever the hell he wanted; she just wanted him to be with her. Now. Tomorrow. And every day after that.

But maybe he wouldn't want to be. Especially if something was really wrong. Maybe he wouldn't be able to deal with it….maybe he'd just leave her.

And she'd be alone. Just like she was tonight. Just like she would be tomorrow.

She clutched the collar of her favorite shirt to sleep in, the Lez Zeppelin shirt Steven had given her a long time ago, and she cried.

All she really wanted was Steven. He should be here. But he wasn't. And she didn't know what to do other than cry.