Disclaimer: I don't own. I'm poor, and I suspect these characters cost a bunch of money. :)

Author's Note: Anyone remember this story? I hope so! I'm so sorry that it's been so long since I've updated it. I've been trying to work on a novel. I still am, but I want to finish this story. So I'm going to. I hope you guys still want to read it! This chapter is hopefully not TOO OOC, but I figure considering the situation, they might be a little bit more three dimensional than they were on the show. Hope you enjoy!

Convincing

Chapter 14 – Do You Love Her?

"What in the hell are you doing?"

Hyde shook his head and turned back to his packing. Whatever Forman had to say wasn't going to change his mind. "None of your business."

Eric shook his head slowly and took a few steps towards Hyde. He couldn't believe what he was seeing. He'd actually started to believe that Hyde genuinely cared about Jackie. Now he wasn't so sure. Obviously Hyde was planning on taking off. "You're not leaving, are you?"

Hyde didn't look up, and continued shoving stuff into his duffel bag. "What's it look like?"

"It looks like you're leaving." Eric began to pace the small room, still shaking his head, but now with less incredulity and more anger. Jackie was SICK, for God's sake! "I can't believe this. I just told Jackie that you weren't going to leave her, and now you're going to leave her."

That made Hyde pause, and he swallowed hard.

Eric noticed that Hyde stopped moving, and he glared at his friend's now stiff back. "Yeah, that's right, Hyde," he snapped. "She's scared that you're going to leave her. God, I can't believe this! What are you thinking?"

Hyde closed his eyes and wished Forman would somehow spontaneously combust, along with the guilt boiling in his gut. The thought that Jackie was worried that he was going to leave her as he was preparing to do exactly that….No. Forman had no idea what he was talking about. He hadn't seen the way she'd been with Kelso. He didn't understand how pointless it was for Hyde to even bother trying to fight it. "Don't judge me, Forman."

Eric rolled his eyes. He was a bit startled at how angry he felt, considering this was all over Jackie, but he didn't have time to think about it. "No, I WILL judge you, Hyde. God, I just saw Jackie sobbing her eyes out because she's so afraid to lose you, and here you are, leaving her when she needs you the most! How can I NOT judge you? Huh?" His eyes shot bullets at his best friend. "Donna said it best. You really are a heartless bastard."

Hyde wanted to flip out, to beat the glare out of Forman's eyes, and then get the hell out of there. Instead, he let go of the duffle bag, hardly seeing as it fell to the floor and spilled his tee-shirts, and sank to the cot. The thought of his dollface crying…sobbing…

Damn it. He just couldn't be what she needed, no matter how much he wanted to. No matter how much he loved her.

And he did. God help him, he loved her. More than he was capable of admitting. Much more.

Eric stared at Hyde. Only one other time had he seen this look on Hyde's face, and even then, it wasn't this clearly etched. A mixture of hurt and jealousy and….fear? He furrowed his brow. What would Hyde have to be afraid of, aside from…Jackie dying. Jackie leaving him. Just like everyone else had left him. Eric's anger began to fade into understanding. "Look, Hyde, I know you're worried about her…"

"She's better of without me, okay?" Hyde stood up and began pacing the small room, shaking his head. The anger and bitterness eating his gut loosened his lips. "You should've seen her with Kelso today. Laughing, yapping away…I come in, she gets all tense. Like she knows I'm not going to…"

"Knows you're not going to what?"

Hyde shook his head roughly and bent down to pick up his fallen duffel. He threw it on his cot and began re-stuffing his shirts into it. "Nothing. Just leave it alone."

"So this is about Kelso? You're leaving because she was laughing with Kelso? Come on, man. That's just stupid."

Hyde whipped around and glared angrily at the know-it-all Forman, and his anger ripped his mouth wide open. "She has to pretend everything is okay, Forman. When she's with me, she has to pretend that she's not scared or in pain when I know she is." He swallowed hard. "Because she knows that I can't…that I'm not…" He smoothed his hand over his mouth. "Eventually she's gonna get sick of it, and then she'll just…" His eyes wandered the room. Not much to look at, but anything was better than meeting Forman's eyes. His face felt hot; he'd said far too much.

He wasn't supposed to have feelings. And damn it, he wished to God he didn't.

"Have you ever thought that maybe when she's pretending everything is okay she's trying to protect you? That she wants you to be happy with her so she won't lose you? That she loves you so much the thought of you leaving her makes her sit in her car and sob her eyes out?" Eric shook his head with a slight smirk. "Kelso might be good comic relief for her, but you…you're the one she wants with her when she goes to the doctor. You're the one she trusts. You're the one she loves, Hyde."

Before he could stop himself, Hyde uttered the question he'd been wondering ever since the first time she'd looked at him with those soft, adoring, love-me-too eyes. "Why?"

For the first time ever, at least as far as he could remember, Eric saw insecurity in his best friend. Hyde was normally so cocky. So sure of himself. This was so odd. "You…look, Hyde, you and Jackie need to talk about this." Hyde rolled his eyes and turned away from him, back towards the cot, and Eric sighed. Of course. Hyde hated talking. "I'm going to ask you something. And you never have to admit to it again. But…" Hyde's body stiffened and stilled, and Eric took a deep breath. He was, once again, risking great bodily harm. "Do you love her?"

Just outside the door to the small room, Jackie leaned against the wall so neither Eric nor Steven could see her. Her heart had stopped beating, and she held her breath. She'd heard nearly the entire conversation, and what she'd heard explained so much. Now she understood how her Steven felt. Tears burned her eyes, but in this second, the only thing that mattered was how Steven answered Eric's question.

How she needed him to love her, because oh, how she loved him.

Hyde turned and looked at Forman, square in the eyes. He raised his shoulders somewhat, hoping that was enough of an answer. It wasn't. Forman raised his eyebrows, and Hyde sighed. Damn it. It was bad enough that Jackie always wanted him to say it. Now he had to say it to Forman? He licked his dry lips, and his gaze dropped to the ground. "Yeah." A pause. "I…I do."

"Steven."

Hyde turned, startled, towards the doorway, and his heart skipped ten beats. Jackie stood there, her make up a mess, wet tracks running down her pale cheeks. "Jackie, what are you…" He trailed off when she started moving towards him, her eyes locked on his, sliding by Forman as if he wasn't even in the room. He couldn't take his eyes off her, god, she was so beautiful, but in his peripheral vision saw Forman slip out of the room. He nodded slightly in gratitude when Forman closed the door behind him. His body began to tingle when Jackie stood only a foot in front of him, so close his nerve endings could imagine her touch.

And every nerve ending in his body wanted her touch.

She tried to smile, but it shook on her lips. "You…do you want to know why I love you, Steven?" she asked, her voice uncharacteristically soft. He didn't answer, except with a slight movement of his lips. She took a deep breath. "Steven, I love you because you're you. Everything about you, even the things that…" She shrugged. "Even the things that drive me crazy…Steven, I just love you so much."

Hyde had to swallow over and over again. Otherwise that stupid burning in his throat was likely to move up to his eyes. And THAT wasn't going to happen. No way in hell he was going to cry. Even though his stomach was all twisted up. Even though his heart felt about ten hundred times its normal size because of Jackie's words. And she meant them. Her eyes never lied. Ever. And right now they were soft and shining. Vulnerable. Honest.

She loved him…because he was himself.

But was it enough? Could it possibly be enough?

He cleared his throat and fought the temptation to touch her. He wanted to so badly. "I…Jackie, I'm never gonna be…I mean, I'm never gonna know what to say…"

Her finger on his lips quieted him, and he swallowed hard again. Her touch, even such a small one, felt so damn good. How could this tiny person, with her tiny fingers, have such a resounding effect on him?

"Steven, it doesn't matter if you don't know what to say." Jackie smiled, and a few tears slowly rolled off her lower eyelashes. She stepped closer to him and softly lay her hands on his chest. "It doesn't matter if you make me laugh…Michael does that…No, no, Steven, listen to me." She gripped his shirt when he began to pull away from her at the mention of her ex-boyfriend's name. "Michael does, that's true, but Steven…Michael doesn't make me feel safe just by holding my hand. Michael doesn't make me feel protected just by standing next to me." Her hands flattened on his chest, and she rubbed tiny circles on him. "You do, Steven. Always." She raised her shoulders. "And that's what I need, Steven. You are what I need."

Hyde didn't dwell on the mushiness inside his gut, around his heart, and instead, grabbed his dollface's little waist and pulled her towards him. Kissing was so much easier than talking. He pressed his lips to hers, and immediately flicked his tongue. She opened for him, and the kiss deepened.

God, I love you, Jackie.

They drew apart, breathing slightly heavy, and Hyde left his face only inches above hers. He pulled her body closer and the feeling of her breasts against his chest, instead of instantly turning him on the way it normally did, made him shiver. Yeah, he loved her so much more than he wanted to admit. And he sure as hell felt it. But damn. She loved him too. She needed him. HIM, and not Kelso. A bit of confidence and security crept into his bones. Maybe he wouldn't lose her after all. "I don't want you to pretend that you're okay when you're not anymore, Jackie. So you need to stop that."

Jackie nodded and slipped her hands underneath his tee shirt. His skin was so warm and smooth, and she moved her touch all the way up to his shoulder blades. "I don't want you to leave me."

His lips curved upwards. "I'm not going to, dollface."

She arched an eyebrow, and her eyes flickered towards his duffel bag. "Kind of looks like it, Steven."

He thought fast. Excuse. Make up an excuse. "That? No no no no no. I was just…I was taking my tee shirts to…to…" He grinned. "To have them appraised. Yeah. I was going to sell them and buy a whole new wardrobe. I'm over the tee shirt thing."

Jackie giggled. Right. The day Steven invested money in clothing was the day she started worshipping foreigners. "Right, honey."

Hyde brushed his lips over hers, and then his smile faded. He looked into her eyes. "I'm not going to leave you, Jackie."

They kissed again, long and soft. When it ended, Jackie looked up at her boyfriend, her face slightly twisted with worry. "You won't leave me? Even if I cry? Even if I…even if…after they shave my head? Even if…"

"Jackie." He covered her lips with his fingers, and stroked them lightly. "I'm not going to leave you." He smiled slightly. "As long as you don't expect me to turn into Forman."

"Oh god, no," she answered with a chuckle. "That would ruin you, Steven."

He nodded. "Remember that when you want me to fawn all over you."

But even as he said it, he knew he would. If she was sick, if she didn't feel well, and if she asked, he knew that he'd run out for some stupid girly magazine for her. Or even, god forbid, disgusting feminine hygiene products.

She stood on her toes and kissed him, and his body tensed with pleasure when her mouth sucked lightly on his lower lip. But she pulled away, and his heart began to sink when she started to cry softly. "Steven," she whispered, her lips trembling like a little girl's after a scolding. "Steven, I'm so…I'm so….I'm so scared!"

And now his sinking heart ached for her. His dollface. His chick. She had to have her head cut open two days from now. She could die. She was staring the grim reaper in his ugly red eyes. He swallowed and pulled her into a hug. "I know," he said lamely.

What else could he say?

After a long, quiet but for her sobs moment, he pulled away and took her hand. "Come here." He dragged her the few feet to the cot then dropped her hand. He pushed the duffel bag off his bed and lay down on his side. He patted the space next to him. "Come here."

Jackie bit her lip. He'd hate her, but the last thing she wanted to do was have sex. "Steven, I'm sorry, I just don't feel like…"

"No, Jackie, I just want to…just come here."

She stared at him, and a smile spread across her face. "Oh my god, Steven, you want to cuddle!" She giggled and clapped her hands together. "I knew you'd turn into a cuddler! I KNEW I'd get you to! Yay!"

He rolled his eyes, but when she lay down next to him and nestled into his arms, he got over it. He supposed he could handle a bit of humiliation if it meant having her close, and hearing her little giggles. "Yeah, whatever, Jackie."

They settled in, Hyde turning over to lie on his back, and Jackie curved up against him, her head on his chest. He stroked her hair. Thick. Soft. He loved how his fingers felt in her hair.

She's going to lose her hair. They have to shave her head in order to cut…

She could die.

He felt sick. She could die. And then…then he'd be without her. No more of her sweet purring into his ear. No more of her weird, usually annoying but endearing efforts to take care of him. No more of her kisses, her hugs. No more of her hissy fits. No more of her.

No more of her.

"Jackie."

She kept her eyes closed and rubbed Steven's flat stomach. "What, Steven?"

He hesitated. He wasn't supposed to admit to this kind of crap. He wasn't even supposed to feel this kind of crap. But…

No more of her.

"I'm scared too, dollface."

Jackie's head shot up, and she stared down at his face. His eyes, blue, beautifully blue, met hers, and the honesty in his brought her tears back. "Oh, Steven…"

She buried her head in the crook of her neck and cried. But his arms were tight around her. She could feel his heart beating underneath her. She could feel the warmth of his breath on her skin, his hands pressing down on her back and burning through her shirt. And it was all she needed.

Hyde squeezed his eyes closed. No. No tears. No, no, no. No.

A silent sob cracked his chest. And something wet built underneath his eyes.

So much for willpower.

Do you love her?

His winced and held her even tighter. She squealed a bit, but didn't protest.

I love her so much.