-Ch 17-

Chase was bored, which, House quickly realized, was not a Good Thing.

House was ready to throttle him. Now, he him self was known far and wide for having an almost non-existent attention span, and getting bored at the drop of a hat. He could sympathize, really.

But Chase was diving him batty. He was spending more time awake as he healed and he was cranky over being kept in bed with nothing to do.

"Wilson! Get you're ass over here and keep me from killing you're little Australian child!" House snapped into the phone from the kitchen looking around the door to keep an eye out in case Chase made another escape attempt.

"...what?"

"Chase! I am going to kill him! You know what dealing with me when I'm bored is like? Double it, add whining in weird Aussie-isms, and constant escape attempts from his bed!"

"Well you know what he's like...he's normally pretty active, it must be boring to be stuck in bed for so long. Give him a TV or something."

"I did! He's still bored!"

"Err , crossword puzzles?"

"Tried it."

"Uh, computer?"

"No help what so ever."

"Your game boy?"

"Helped for about two minutes before he got killed, and bored again."

"ipod?"

"He complained about my music."

"Huh...ok yeah this is bad. Drug him."

"You stupid or something? That is what got us into this situation in the first place!"

Wilson sighed. "It was just a suggestion. Alright, have you tried letting him play with the psychotic pets?"

"Huh?"

"Chase likes those little monsters you two call pets so that should keep him happy for at least a little while."

"That...is actually a good plan. And they're not monsters, they just don't like you."

"That's why I'm the mom. Have fun." Wilson said hanging up.

House quickly opened the door to Steve's cage and let him climb up to his shoulder, then opened Chexie's cage and pulled her out to hop into his other shoulder. Chexie spit at Steve, while Steve simply ignored the bird.

"Chaaaase! Got a pressie for you!"

Chase scowled up from the TV he was only half watching then grinned brightly when he saw Steve and Chexie.

House plopped the rat on his chest and set the bird on his head. "There. Play. Have fun. Stop whining." Before falling into his chair and pulling out his game boy.

Chase happily petted both animals. "Awww Chexie! I missed you too. Yeah I haven't been able to play with you much lately."

House looked up and eyed Chase. "What kind of name is Chexie anyway?"

Chase suddenly blushed wildly.

"Oh now I really want to know!"

Chase sighed still petting Steve and Chexie. "It's short for Cachexia."

"...as in the medical condition? Physical wasting with loss of weight and muscle mass caused by disease?"

"I was a kid ok! I read it in one of my father's books and I thought it sounded cool and was fun to say..." Chase muttered waving a hand around and still blushing.

House snickered. "You are so weird."

Chase scowled. "Takes one to know one!"

House snorted. "What are you 10?"

Chase started to reply when he froze and looked around. "Where'd Steve go?"

House sat up straighter. "What!"

"He was here a second ago..."

They both tried to look around to see where the rat had gotten to, when Chase yelped.

"What now!"

"I think I found him! Pants! He's in my pants!" Chase squeaked.

House blinked then stood to pull the blanket on the bed down. "Steve what the hell are you doing?"

A muffled squeak came from Chase's sweatpants.

"Don't just stand there, help me!" Chase yelped.

House rolled his eyes and reached inside Chase's waistband.

Chase squeaked this time. "What are you doing!"

"...getting Steve?"

"...that's not Steve..." Chase gasped.

House froze then coughed pulling his hand back out. "Err Steve?"

"Leg. The left one."

House moved down to Chase's legs and carefully slid his hand up the pants leg. "Where are you, you little rat?" He growled under his breath as his hand inched higher.

Chase's eyes glazed over as House's hands inched higher up his leg, trying to find Steve. His hands moved slowly. A little too slowly, because Steve was already making a break for freedom, crawling out of a hole worn into the knee of the pants leg.

Chase's glanced down and saw House hadn't seen Steve and a grin crossed his face. He scooped up the amused looking rat and hid him under the blanket.

Chase pasted a worried look back on his face as House looked up. "Where the hell did he get to?"

"I don't know!"

"Well he has to be here! He can't have disappeared!" House snapped scowling trying to ignore that fact that it wasn't exactly torture to be running his hand up Chase's long, lean, muscled leg.

"Just keep looking." Chase encouraged.

House grunted and kept sliding his hand up further.

Chase swallowed hard, trying to keep from laughing.

House got to the holes in the knees and glared. "Steve! You are so grounded mister!"

Chase couldn't help but laugh at that. "How do you ground a rat? Take away his wheel?"

"No. I take away his rat treats! You hear me Steve!"

Steve's head popped out from under the blanket.

House spotted him and pulled his arm back from Chase's pants leg, not noticing Chase's pout, and scoped up his rat. "There you are! Don't do that! It's not nice to scare daddy like that!"

Chase bit his lip and shook with laughter. "...daddy?"

House glared at him. "Shut. Up. I have seen you naked and can spread vicious rumors to all potential lays!"

"Are you forgetting all potential lays think I'm a married gay man?"

House waved him off. "Please. Half the fun is trying to get you back to their side. They'll seduce you with the feminine wiles and steal you away from your loving husband"

Chase slowly smirked. "Who says I want either?" Chase said slowly sliding a hand up House's own thigh.

House froze. "Err...what are you doing, Wombat?''

Chase pouted playfully. "Well my husbandly needs have been ignored so far. I don't think that's fair."

House swallowed. "Uh Chase...did you get into the pain meds?"

Chase smirked and shook his head lightly moving Chexie and Steve to the headboard where they won't be squished, then grabbed House's hands and put them back on his thighs, then slid his own hands back up House's. "I don't need drugs to want to jump your bones."

House's eyes quickly glazed over and he struggled to focus. "Uh Chase we can't do this!"

"Why not? We are married aren't we?"

"Ahhh You're Catholic!"

Chase gave him amused look while he slid his hand further up House's legs.

"...stitches?" House muttered weakly.

"I feel fine. Wanna take a feel?" Chase leered.

"Chaaase!" House groaned quickly losing what little mental faculties he was holding onto.

"Hoooouse." Chase teasingly moaned back.

House's hands were moving of their own accord, his hands inching up, thumbs grazing over Chase's hips, which jerked slightly as House found a ticklish spot. House reflexively tightened his grip, unfortunately for Chase, House's grip was right over his fresh stitches.

Chase gasped and pulled back, smacking his head against the headboard. Chexie squawked angrily.

"Dammit." House pulled him self back panting and glared. "You little idiot."

"I'm okay," Chase gasped, slowly straightening. He smiled shakily at House and reached out for him again. House smacked the hand.

"Nuh-uh. No nookey for you just because you're bored."

"I'm not bored!" Chase denied. "Well, okay, I'm fantastically bored." He amended. "But I still want to have sex with you."

House groaned. "No sex until you're healed. You do remember we're just married so I can get time off don't you?"

Chase pouted. "You started it." He argued playfully.

"Did not!"

"Did too.!"

"Did not!"

"You kissed me!"

"You climbed into bed with me!"

"I had a concussion!"

"That doesn't count!" House grabbed Chase's creeping hands and pinned them to the bed.

"You behave. I'm going to… go order more pancakes."

House quickly limped out of the room, and Chase snickered as he heard the bathroom door slammed.

He reached up to scratch Steve behind the ears. "Ah well it was worth a shot...I'll get his ass next time."

Steve squeaked approvingly.