Disclaimer: I do not own anything in here. If I did, I would pay someone else to do this. :)
Hyde A/N: All may rejoice, for Hyde has finally updated this! You see, my computer has had internet problems (and still has them) so Ais is updating this for me, like the kind friend she is. Hopefully, you still remember what's going on...I'm not sure I do. :)
Mr. Llama hovered in front of his face, waving papers.
"What are those?"
"Har har har!" Mr. Llama laughed. "This is the deed to everything you own."
"Even..."
"Yes, even...the XL orbo gun!"
"How did you find out about that? You weren't supposed to know..."
"I have my sources." Mr. Llama's evil smile hovered unrealistically in front of his face.
"NOOOOOOOO!" Amon cried out, waking himself up. He sat up straight in bed, his witch hunter instincts vibrating. He got up and cleaned his orbo gun, soothing himself. He wished he had Robin's powers of flame. Things would be so much simpler. He fell back to sleep, clutching the orbo gun tightly.
His orbo gun fell into the chasm. Mr. Llama was getting away. He ran after him, but his legs were so slow. He stumbled, and his macho black coat fell into the chasm too. When he got up, Mr. Llama was gone.
"No..." he muttered.
Then Robin was there. He could see the flame in her eyes. She was going to send him up in flames.
"No, Robin, I didn't mean...its not like that..." he protested, not even sure what he was talking about.
"Evil..." she said in her soft voice. "Evil must be eliminated."
He knew, somehow, that she had been taken over by Mr. Llama and sent to destroy him.
"Robin...he doesn't...this isn't..." he found himself tripping over his tongue, unable to complete the sentence that would bring her to her senses. He reached into his pocket for his orbo gun. But the orbo gun and his coat were gone. He felt exposed and helpless without the volumes of his coat to hide in, without an orbo gun at his side to dispose of any danger.
Flames gathered in front of her. He felt fear. Suddenly, the reassuring coldness of an orbo gun in his hand. He brought it up, took aim at her figure dimmed by the wall of fire...
Bam!
Amon woke suddenly. His orbo gun was in his hand and there was a smoking hole in the wall opposite his bed.
"Doujima. Come with me."
Oh, no, not again! She thought. It always meant trouble when Amon wanted her along.
"What now, Amon?" she asked him.
"I have a top-secret assignment for you. I want you to go to the office of a company called Random Insurance. Ask to speak with Mr. Llama. Get pictures of everything and record every conversation, no matter what. Remember, top secret. You can't tell anyone, not even the others."
"Aw, come on Amon! Why can't I tell the others?"
"You can't."
"Whatever, Amon." She sighed in exasperation, tired of arguing the point with him every time. Why did he always have to pick on her?
Mr. Llama happily typed away at his computer, elevating the insurance rates of every client possible for every even vaguely legitimate reason. It was the joy of his life, the thing he was dedicated to: finding devious new ways to jack up insurance prices for any reason whatsoever. As part of that, he tried to convince people to buy useless insurance policies.
"Ah ha!" he said triumphantly. He had finally finished and perfected his Doorknob Insurance Plan, chock full of loopholes so that the company would never have to pay a dime. Now, to find someone to pick on, someone to stalk (not illegally, of course) until he finally convinced them to buy doorknob insurance.
His secretary stuck her head in, interrupting his train of thought.
"A Miss Chow to see you, sir."
"Thank you, Miss Smarklepuss. By the way, I don't suppose you'd be interested in going out for some tofu later?"
"Oh," she said, flattered. "Well, I..." She turned pink (or perhaps more of a magenta).
"Over lunch break," he said.
"Mmm-hmm," she smiled, shyly. She left his office, smoothing her blonde-with-a-few-gray-hairs and giggling.
"Mr. Llama will see you now..." she said to Doujima, and flushed magenta-orange. She giggled and patted her hair again. Doujima rolled her eyes.
"Hello, Miss Chow," said Mr. Llama pleasantly. "Do sit down."
"Thank you," said the slim blonde, taking a leather chair designed to inspire the client's confidence in Mr. Llama. "I was highly recommended to you by a friend. He said that Random Insurance was the best place to get every kind of insurance you need, and he said a friend of his recommended you quite highly for the type of insurance I'm looking for. He said you specialize in somewhat...out of the ordinary insurance plans. My friend wants..."
"So you're representing someone else?"
"Oh, yes, did I not tell you? I am here for a good friend of mine who is quite paranoid about things. Wants insurance for everything. She's so paranoid she rarely conducts business in person. She was dissatisfied with the prices of her former insurance company."
"Well, I can assure you Random has the best prices for every kind of insurance."
"Yes."
"Well, what did you have in mind, Miss Chow?" Mr. Llama could smell the money. Unconsciously, he leaned forward in greedy anticipation.
"Well, my friend has been worried about her, ah, windows of late. I was wondering..."
"Why of course!" said Mr. Llama ecstatically, typing eagerly on a computer that was painted a specific shade of cream to inspire the client's trust. "I have just what you need." He had long ago invented window insurance. "Shall I give you the forms?"
"That would be fine," said Doujima, surreptitiously snapping pictures with a miniature camera.
"I'll have to go get them from my secretary. Pardon me..." He left.
Doujima immediately jumped up and began snapping lots and lots of pictures of everything. His desk, the papers on it, the diplomas and awards on his walls, everything. When he came back in, she was sitting down as though nothing had happened.
"Thank you, Mr. Llama," she said.
"You're quite welcome, Miss Chow," said Mr. Llama, and shook her hand in a way that was scientifically designed to insinuate trustworthiness.
Hyde A/N: I'm not going to respond to reviews because those were a long time ago and because I'm lazy. And I never have any time any more. Yeah.
May the tree outside your window never engage in a conversation in rapid Spanish with the grass at midnight,
--Hyde
Ais sayeth: Glee! It actually kept the bold/italics this time! --dances around in circle with coffeepot-- Eh. Eight cups of coffee.