Wonderful World
An AU parody inspired by "As Good As It Gets"; beta-read, reviewed and edited by Howling WereWolf.

And onward we go. With each step I take, I'm scared of screwing up so bad, I keep going back to the not-so-final screenplay of As Good As It Gets...now that I think of it, I understand and appreciate why HW keeps borrowing that DVD as she does.

I tried some research, I mentally replay scenes while I'm trying to sleep, and I feel so blank and shagged out.

What a great day this is.

It had been days since Cid remembered what it was like to be energetic. Now, he was just lethargic, grumpy, sick of everything.

Plus, Aeris was late. Again.
If he didn't know better, someone was scheming against him, somewhere...

Then the door to his shop slid open, and heavy footsteps resonated across the flooring as someone approached the table.

"About time you got here," Cid muttered from under the car he was working on.

There was no answer, but the small insignificant sounds of rustling cash notes and creaking drawers could be heard. Then the heavy footsteps again as their owner moved to the door.

"Ain't ya taking my stuff out?" Cid reminded hotly.

"Why the heck would I do that?" a low, confused voice replied.

Cid nearly banged his head against the bottom of the car before he scrambled out to look at the delivery person. Looking back down at him was not Aeris, but her fellow worker Johnny.

"Where's Aeris!" Cid demanded.

Johnny looked irritated, but answered anyway. "She's considering getting a job closer to home; probably not coming back. I'm filling in for her until we get a replacement."

Cid blanched white, sputtering a little.
"What the crap are you trying to do to me?"

Now Johnny was both irritated and confused. "Heck do you mean?"

"Look here, wash-up lover boy, call her or something...just let her do my one meal here; I'll pay whatever. I'll wait."

"I don't think you understood me-"

"Do it!"

Johnny stood there, stunned. Then his face darkened dangerously, and he strode back toward the table and slammed the money back into the drawer before grabbing the box and striding back toward the door.

It was Cid's turn to be confused. "What are you doing?"

"I'm leaving. From now on, forget about ever calling our cafe again - we will not serve you or put up with your attitude any more."

Realizing how drastic the situation had become, Cid fumbled for the right words to use hastily.
"I-I'll be quiet. Just let me wait. No problem. Just get her here - have her bring my usual lunch order. I'm not a prick here - I'm a great customer. This day - these few days - has been a disaster. I can't handle this, too."

"The world does not revolve around you, Mr. Highwind!" Johnny snapped back. But at least he had stopped for the moment.

"...then could you at least give me an address? A number? Her last name?"

Johnny turned to say something when he noticed that Cid had clambered out from behind the car and was now right up in his face. "See here-"

"...could you just freakin' help me?" Cid finally blurted out, dropping his hands downward in exasperated desperation.

Johnny stopped talking, and so did Cid. For a moment, neither knew what to say - what should really be said in this precarious situation.

Cid sighed; it had been such a lousy time. "I get it. See ya."

"...mind if I use that pen and paper? I'll write it down for you."

Cid watched as Johnny carefully replaced the box on the table, then scribbled something down onto the semi-clean scrap of notepad. Ripping it out, he handed it to Cid, took back the money from the drawer, and was gone.

Cid looked down at the slightly crumpled, slightly dirty note. He looked at the half-open drawer, where his leftover money lay untouched. He looked at the box on the table, the smell of food escaping from it.

"...what if this is as good as it gets?" he asked.

He got no answer.

Ring-ring!

"I'm coming!"

The black-stained cloth and thermometer still in hand, Tifa hurried to the door and yanked it open.

There stood a disgruntled looking blond carrying a crumpled dirty note and chewing on a straw.

"Where's Aeris? I'm hungry. She's upset my whole day. I haven't eaten."

Tifa opened her mouth to say something, but the man wasn't done.

"This is not a sexist thing - if she were a delivery boy, I would still be here saying-"

"Who the heck are you?" Tifa finally blurted out, cutting him short in his rant.

At that point, Yuffie looked in from her room, catching sight of the commotion at the door.
"Hi, Mr. Highwind!" she called, then slipped back in as she called to the other side of the hall. "Aeris; Mr. Highwind's here!"

"What?" came Aeris' incredulous cry.

Moments later, Aeris joined Tifa at the door, her face a mixture of surprise and confusion.
"What are you doing here? At the door of my private home, no less!"

Cid held his hands up in a pacifying gesture, though his facial expression chimed a different tune. "I'm trying to keep emotions out of this, see. Even though this is an important issue to me, and I got some strong feelings about the subject."

"What subject? That I wasn't there to hear you beat off to yourself and bring you sausages in cheese sauce?" Aeris protested, irritation slowly creeping into her tone. "Cid, do you have any control over how creepy you allow yourself to get?"

Cid lowered his hands, nodding. "Yes, I do. As a matter of fact...and to prove it, I have not gotten personal, and you have."

There is a moment of silence - a wordless compromise.

"Why aren't you at work? You're not sick - you don't look sick-" Cid paused to look from one lady to the next. "Neither of you do. You're both just very tired and very bitter."

"My boy is sick, alright? She's helping me."

That said, Tifa excused herself and moved to dump the ice back into the sink. At that point, a young boy sluggishly moved out from a different room, his hand over his forehead as he peered in.

"...Tifa?"

"Sorry, Denzel; I'll be right with you."

Denzel looked away from Tifa at the sink and up at Cid, who had now stepped halfway through the door. Cid looked back at him.

"How ya doing?" Cid asked uncomfortably.

Denzel was silent, solemnly staring up at the older man.

Miffed, Cid continued speaking. "You should answer when someone talks to you-"

Tifa looked right miffed herself at this point.

"Alright, Cid Highwind, that's about it," Aeris quickly spoke, firmly pushing Cid backward out the door as she moved to shut it. "Thank you for stopping by, but I'm not sure I can handle you teaching any of the kids manners."

As the door closed, Denzel groaned and pressed his hand a little harder against his forehead. Tifa noticed instantly.

"Let me see that."

Reluctantly, Denzel took his hand away, showing pitch-black staining his palm and sticking to his fingers.

"...head hurts," he mumbled.

"Not good."

"Damn people...of all places to feed the birds...!"

Sidestepping away from a young couple feeding a chorus of white chocobos, Cid hailed an approaching cab. As it pulled up, Aeris and Tifa came running out, Tifa carrying Denzel.

"Cid, wait!"

The chocobos paused their eating for a brief moment as they picked up the chant in unison like a flock of parrots.
"Cid, wait! Cid, wait! Cid, wait!"

"Shut up, you fiends!" Cid hollered back at the chocobos, causing the lot to spread wings and fly away in a white flurry. The young couple looked surprised, then disappointed as they moved on.

Tifa and Aeris soon caught up to him.

"Cid, we need a lift; got some friends at the lodge to meet."

Taken aback, Cid dumbly nodded and opened the door, Tifa wasting no time in sliding into the back seat. Cid hesitated for a moment, then went around to take the front seat.

"I owe you the cab fare!" Aeris called from the sidewalk, already starting to move back toward the apartment.

Cid paused in the doorway. "...any chance you'll get back to work today?"

"NO! Get in that cab!"

Not thinking to disobey, Cid hurried to get himself seated, and the cab sped away.

Huddled by the front door, Angelo listlessly stared up at it, his back to the living room where Cloud and Sora were seated on the couch.

"I feel terrible that I have to... Cloud?" Sora looked up at Cloud, who was staring at Angelo's furry brown-and-white back. "Cloud, could you leave the dog for a second?"

Cloud quickly turned his attention back to Sora in a forced manner. "Sorry...what are those cards?"

Sora looked back down at the flash cards in his hand, now a bit embarrassed about the whole issue. "It was Riku's idea - he thought I should have notes, so I did this right; maintained focus, didn't get emotional, and tried not to terrify you..."

Cloud promptly paled, his good hand squeezing the armrest reflexively.

"See, he's right; I need these cards..." Sora trailed off as he looked down at the card before him. Taking in a deep breath, he read from it.
"Cloud, you and Leon are broke.

"The show didn't go well, and the overall sum for both the medical bills and the damages add up to-"

"Stop there for a moment, please."

Sora waited as Cloud caught his breath and regained his composure.

"...thanks. Just...skip the figures and go on."

Nodding, Sora shuffled the card to the back and read from the next one.
"I've tried to speak with both Leon's father and his grandfather. Mr. Leonhart has agreed to do whatever he can, but Mr. Loire's secretary said he was busy-"

"I did not expect any different, I guess," Cloud interrupted quietly, struggling to suppress his emotions. Craning his neck around, he whistled to the puppy.

"...Angelo? What is it, snookums? What's wrong, you miss the tough guy? Well, here I am, sweetheart!"

Angelo jumped up and spun around, staring wide-eyed at Cloud as the man continued to boom with a strangely rough tone.

"Happy to see me, you little pissant mop? How about another ride downtown in the paper bin?"

Angelo drooped.

Cloud's face fell as well.
"Oh, Hyne...I'm so sorry, baby; I didn't mean that..."

Angelo turned back to face the front door and dropped back down, whimpering softly.
Cloud groaned and ran his good hand through his unkempt hair. Breathing in deeply, he straightened up slightly. "... Sorry."

Sora nodded in understanding.

"...we'll still be able to keep the apartment and studio, right?"

Sora promptly bowed his head as he went back to shuffling cards.

Cloud reached forward and took the whole stack from the smaller boy's hands and set them on the table, spreading them out on said table to look at them all. Finally, overwhelmed, he sank back into his seat.

"...wow..."

Sora carefully reached forward and took the stack back, no longer sure of what he was going to say.

Cloud turned to look at Angelo again. Then he pulled himself off the couch and crossed the living room to where the pup lay on the carpet.

"... I didn't mean it, boy..." he murmured, reaching forward to pet the dog.

Angelo shrunk into the carpet.

Cloud's hand remained suspended inches from the puppy's coat, then dropped back to his side as he sat down on the floor as well.

"Damn it, I really didn't..."

My boss asked me to sit down and meditate for a bit during my lunch break - something about consolidating my thoughts - I guess I'm starting to act too much like Mr. Nicholson for my own good.

I think I'm boned...

...alright, I'm done with the angst stuff, and should really get back to the plotlines.

Thanks to all who dropped in to take a peek.

Niana Kuonji: Thanks for the boost; I appreciate it.

Shiri Matakami: I'm glad you're enjoying yourself with this story; I'll do what I can.

Anendee: Now that is quite a bit of encouragement. Thanks.

bdsproductions: I'll leave the passionate loving to the experts and stick with my lot in life, but thanks for your commentary. Every opinion counts.