Wonderful World
An AU parody inspired by "As Good As It Gets"; beta-read, reviewed and edited by Howling WereWolf.

And here's the next update: as it turns out, either I've finally got an epiphany, or else I've regained my senses to a neat.

Apologies for the long wait - I nearly threw myself into a corner with all the plans I had out before me.
Something about "when you got to go, you got to go".

And yes, I did happen to watch Lion King 1½ - Hakuna Matata. That was fun.

Extra note: While widening my circle of beta-readers, I was requested by one of them to explain why I spelt Aerith's name with an "s" in this story, yet with "th" in my other Kingdom Hearts fan-fiction.
When I first started on this, I was looking at the English translation which came directly from the American dub, thus the American spelling. Later, when I acquired more background knowledge and managed a few videos of Advent Children, I discovered the original spelling. However, for the sake of consistency, I will not change the spelling of her name. I apologize for the confusion.

The clock read three-twenty-two.

Three-twenty-two AM.

Cid stared at the obnoxious digits for a little longer, then set the clock back on the table with a muttered oath.

Rising from his mattress, he shuffled into the bathroom.
Two seconds later, he exited the bathroom and plopped back down onto the mattress.

"...so it wasn't a freakin' call of nature..." he muttered.

He got up again, and fidgeted restlessly before leaving his sleeping quarters again. This time, he set himself down in his work office.

The typewriter was still there.

Staring at the confounded antique for a few more minutes, Cid swore and got up yet again. Disappearing into the kitchen pad, the sound of the fridge door opening and closing could be heard.

With the push of a button, the microwave oven door popped open. Setting a small cardboard bucket inside, he set the timer.

"If it don't explode in my face, it's safe," he decided.

The microwave appeared to agree on similar lines.

There was a knock on the door, and Angelo was up on its feet almost immediately.

Reluctantly, Cloud crossed the room and unlocked the door, opening it.

"Took a chance you boys were up," Cid explained, holding up the cardboard bucket. "Brought you some Chinese soup."

"Oh...thanks..."

Taking the bucket, Cloud walked back in, leaving the door open for Cid.

As Cloud disappeared into the kitchen, Cid crossed the living room to where Leon was still in his spot, still looking at nothing in particular. The only thing different, was that the tension had subsided - the young man was no longer infuriated, but simply bitter and disgruntled.

"Okay, if I sit here?"

Leon did not answer.

Cid sat anyway, a heavy sigh escaping his lips as Angelo settled at his feet.

The two men sat across one another, silent and brooding - an uncomfortable, uneasy silence.

"I have never been so tired in my life," Cid muttered, breaking that silence. Leon continued to stare into space, showing no sign of listening.

Cid continued his one-man confessional.
"I haven't been sleeping... I haven't been clear, or felt like myself. I'm in trouble...some son of a bitch is burning my freakin' bridges behind my back. But the tiredness...boy..."

Then another voice chipped in, barely above a mumble.
"...sick...nauseous..."

"...not just sleepy..." Cid went on.

"...everything looks distorted..."

"...everything inside just aches..."

"...and you can barely find the will to complain."

"...yeah..." Cid looked up at Leon, his expression brightened.

Leon's head was turned slightly in his direction, his eyes trained on Cid. For once, he did not look like he wanted to kill the older man and dispose of the body in twelve different locations.

Something had just happened. A sense of familiarity. A sense of community. It was something neither had really felt before, and neither knew how to take it from there.

Finally, Cid rose to his feet and nodded, more for his own benefit.
"I'm glad we did this... Good talking to you."

Giving Leon an awkward pat on his shoulder, Cid hastily turned and walked out the door.

Leon stared after him, then exchanged a confused look with Angelo, who had been left on the floor throughout.

Cloud came in at that point, the soup poured out into bowls. His eyes scanned the room carefully, then finally settled on Leon's figure.

"...where'd he go?"

"Home."

"He what? ... I need to sit down..."

Aeris looked right confused and uncertain as she did just that, observing the wood grain on the kitchen table. Tifa sat across from her, patiently waiting to continue. It took a few minutes of blank staring before she got the nod to go ahead.

"He's your regular customer, and that makes him - as Yuffie says it - your 'secret admirer'. I thought it was only right to fill you in."

"Thank you; I appreciate that," Aeris replied, the uncertainty having taken a long-term residence upon her face for the time being. Then she shook her head. "Look, Tifa, the man behind this...well, Cid's a seriously goofy man. That fact can not, and will not, be blocked out."

"I wouldn't dream of it," Tifa answered, "but Aeris... I do not want to go back to the runt doctors in Emergency who keep telling me they can't help."

"Tifa, I understand, but... No matter what, I'm still on your side. It's just that this is going to open the gate and let a crazy man walk into our lives; are you sure you're fine with that?"

Aeris waited for Tifa's answer; it didn't take all that long to come out.

"... I'm not going to fight when the result is right in front of me, and this isn't like stocking or a string of pearls that I can dump back in the box and pretend I never saw it. If this can help Denzel, I'm willing to give it a try. I know it's selfish, but I want to say it anyway: we can't just send this one back. I can't just send this one back.
"Please Aeris, just this once, let's not send this one back."

Moments later, the typewriter was fixed, cleaned up, and shining like new.

A phone call - and some minutes later - its owner came to pick it up.

Cid sat at the now bare workbench, scratching at his five o'clock shadow he had left unshaved. Shaking his head in defeat, he chuckled.

Who would have thought...?

He checked his clock again, then set it back down.

He'd have to go back up there and walk their dog in a couple of hours.

It was some time in late evening when Yuffie walked into the kitchen to find Aeris and Tifa sitting by the table and writing, a stack of paper between them. Approaching, she picked up one of the top sheets.
"What are you writing?"

"Thank-you note; we're almost at the last page," Tifa answered distractedly, before shaking her head. "I keep forgetting; how's 'conscience' spelt again?"

"C-o-n-s-c-i-e-n-c-e," Aeris informed, not looking up from her own sheet of paper. Tifa nodded her thanks and wrote it down.

Yuffie looked from one to the other, then poked them in the shoulder. "Hey, I think I can handle Marlene and Denzel for a couple of minutes; how about getting some air?"

Tifa batted Yuffie's finger away. "You know how we feel about leaving you kids by yourselves; anything could happen."

Yuffie didn't back down, but kept her fingers to herself this time. "Denzel's okay; it wouldn't hurt for you to have something else to do in your free time. You got a lucky break - step out a little!"

"Yuffie, we're not going anywhere."

Yuffie huffed, strutting and pumping her arms. "How about I call Mr. Highwind and ask him to send in a shrink or two?"

"Yuffie!" Aeris cried out in exasperation, finally looking up from her paper. "And on that subject, we don't need one; we know what's really going on here. Now let us finish this letter before we go criminally insane."

Yuffie fell silent, then pulled up a chair for herself and sat down. She stared from one to the other, waiting.

And it was Tifa who broke down first. Dropping her pen she propped her elbow against the tabletop, and her forehead against her palm.

"Look, I... I just don't know. It's strange not feeling that stupid panic thing inside you all the time. And without that, you just start thinking about yourself...and like that does anything for anybody..."

Aeris stopped writing as well, setting her own pen down to listen with full attention.

"... It's like all this while I had no clue that things were going in the wrong direction...away from when I remembered what things were like before...before all this."

"It's okay, Tifa; Denzel's doing fine. You're just frustrated and worked up-"

"Look, I'm tired, okay? Just why are you doing this? What is it that you want? What's with you? What is it?"

Yuffie didn't twitch, and as Tifa calmed down she reached over again and took her hand.

"I want you two to go out, get some fresh air, and get away from everything for fifteen minutes."

When neither answered straight away, she grinned. "Hey, I'm a big girl now! I can do this!"

Tifa managed an exhausted smile and finally nodded her consent. "...okay."

It was almost dark when Cid returned to the apartment with Angelo following eagerly, little tail swishing as the man reached down to unhook the leash from its collar.

"... There ya go, little nit. Reckon your mom and dad are sleeping, so I'll go fix your dinner before I disappear, eh?"

In answer, the puppy stepped away and shook its fur out. Cid grunted and got to his feet, slapping dust off his hands.

Then there was a loud "thump" from down the hall, and Cid froze for a half-second, looking cautiously back outside. The dog looked up, wagged its tail, and trotted over to its empty bowl, looking quizzically back at Cid and wondering why the man wasn't going into the kitchen.

Cid hung at the door for a few more minutes before dismissing the feeling of paranoia. Pulling off his gloves, he stepped toward the kitchen.

Then a big hand grabbed his shoulder and spun him around.

Cid nearly had a heart attack when he found himself face to face with what looked like Leon's future many tens of good years down the road. Even scars were present, those these were situated strictly across the left side of the man's face.

But that pissed-off look was unmistakable as a glove-covered finger shot out and pointed at him.

"Where are they?"

"...uh?" was all Cid managed out before he had the feeling of getting rattled like a...well, like a rattle.

"I said, where are they?"

At this point, Angelo squeaked and fled under the couch, the tail barely sticking out.

The door swung open, revealing Cloud and Leon to be very much awake. Leon's eyes widened in shocked recognition as Cloud wiped sleep from his.

"What's going on out t... Granddad!"

Disclaimer - The character Pride Leonhart is under the unofficial writer's ownership of Flypipe, recent new member to and Howling WereWolf's comrade-in-pens.

I apologize to all readers for the delay in update. I initially wanted to get it done at least a month ago, but I allowed myself to overcomplicate Pride's entrance; I guess I just plain suck at writing in originals. And for further excitement, neither Howling WereWolf nor Flypipe wish to review; Flypipe has recently washed his hands of the matter, and asked me to leave it all up to the infamous Writer's Whim. Something about utter craziness with Video Production projects and other stuff leaving him too overwhelmed to see my work.
Thus, I appeal to you, readers, for any feedback at all regarding how I am doing.

Thank you all for your support thus far.

bdsproductions: Well, that's the red-light district, I guess. I'm amazed how people acquire the skills to write that stuff - it's like literature. No offense.

Shiri Matakami: Cid the stalker... Score!

Angstluver: Well, I'm just glad I didn't take as long as I expected myself to.

Niana Kuonji: Sorry for the drag, but here's the update. With all this angst going on, I can only hope to do As Good As It Gets justice as I go along.

Ashti: Glad to have you with us, and hope you get enough rest; getting sick from lack of sleep is like a stick up the butt.
And I'm the little prodigal son who doesn't practice what he preaches, but you didn't hear me say that.

scarlettHuntress: I'm glad you like it. Sorry about all the angst - really whacks hard against that Fruits Basket story I finished some years ago. As Good As It Gets is quite the movie, with Mr. Nicholson at his sardonically humorous best, but that's just me.

koyuki-san: I love that movie; the very first time I saw it inspired me to try something like it. If I remember the ending correctly, Simon moved in with Melvin, and they pretty much share the dog. Well, this is supposed to be some kind of turning point, so less angst is expected.