Reign of Fire: Rising from the Ashes

Chapter Twenty One- Confessions of a medicated mind

Oh yeah, I could seriously get used to this…

Holly relaxed and rolled her head to the side as Creedy was once again carrying her around the castle. Now that she was conscious and her reflexes seemed OK, Doc had been able to provide her with the much wished for morphine and it was safe to say she was more than a little spaced out.

Looking back and forth between her and the dead rebel by her bed, Creedy had stubbornly decided she would not spend another moment in that cursed operating room, and had insisted to take her back to "his place". At first Holly had objected that his room would hold equally strong memories of Kayleigh as the infirmary, to which Creedy had dryly promised to change the sheets and burn any left-over items he might still find of the witch. Holly had cheekily reminded him to check under the bed for any stained panties, before the morphine truly kicked in and even Creedy realised no rational talk -or scolding for that matter- would get through to her at this point.

"Are we there yet?"

"Almost darlin', why? Are your wounds hurting?"

"Naaahhhh…I was just thinking you'd have to put me down again and that would truly suck…" Smooth line Holly! Jeez, get your brain together girl, what must he think of you?

Upon looking up at him however, she saw nothing but a very content smile plastered across his face. "Maybe you should try to shut up for a bit love. We'll have plenty of time to talk later."

"I'm not really making a lot of sense right now eh?"

"Not really, no. Rubix cube just got a little more complicated…"

"What was that?"

"Nothing, you just sleep OK?"

"I guess…" and with that she rested her head back against his strong chest once more, and actually managed to doze off before reaching his room.

As soon as he had Holly settled in he allowed himself to sink down by her on the bed, trying to recapture all events of the last few hours. Weeks actually. Where was your great sense for women then eh Creed? He smirked. Never in his life had he made such bad judgement calls as he had over the past few days. How could he ever have trusted Kayleigh the way he did? Easy enough mate, she just shagged every piece of doubt from your cluttered brain is how!

He had let his body take over from his mind for only a minute and all his reserve had flown right out the window. And it nearly cost Holly her life. Holly…

He turned to his side, studying her beautiful face once more, never tiring of it. His relief at finding her awake, at finding her actually opening up to him was beyond anyone's imagination. Would this mean they would have a second chance together? Before he could ponder the thought any further however he felt himself slipping off into a peaceful slumber. As he carefully wrapped an arm around Holly's sleeping frame he allowed his eyes to shut. There would be plenty of time to talk later, that's what he had promised Holly right?

As there came no reply to her knock, and there was no reason to assume they'd walk in on anything they shouldn't be seeing, Alex quietly proceeded in opening the door to Creedy's room, Quinn close behind her. On seeing her tender smile he peeked in over her shoulder to find Creedy and Holly both fast asleep, bundled up in each other's arms. Both of them seeming more at ease as they had been for a very long time.

"You think they finally found each other this time?"

Alex shrugged her shoulders. "I don't know hun, but it sure looks like it…" She carefully closed the door again and began scribbling a "do not disturb patient resting" sign on it.

"Alex? What's…I mean…has Holly ever talked about what's bothering her so much? It almost feels like she has this great burden to carry around on her shoulders and she's afraid of sharing with anyone…or afraid someone will find out?"

Alex gave him a cheeky smile: "And if you're so sure she doesn't want anyone to find out, why would I tell you?" Upon seeing his hurt eyes she kissed him and quietly continued. "You still remember the story of the Phantom of the Opera? Twist it backwards and you have your answer sweetie. Minus the Holly getting all mental part…she left that to the slutty Rebel bitch…"

Quinn let his mind wander back to the musical of old as he started to understand. "You mean she's…scarred or something? That's what she was ashamed about?"

By now they'd reached their own room again and Alex pulled him back on the bed with her. "Trust me sweetie, if you were hurt the way Holly has been you'd be stuck in a shell as well…"

Quinn kissed her lovingly, as he ran an affectionate hand across her swelling abdomen. "Well if anyone seems to be getting through to her it's Creed…It's good this way. They could both do with a little affection. True affection that is…"

As Holly woke up she found a hand on her abdomen as well. But as the misty haze of drug induced sleep lifted, she noticed the hand had slid under the hem of her t-shirt. A t-shirt, she had realised, that belonged to the man now peacefully sleeping beside her. As the operation was finished they had needed something to dress her in, and seeing as how her own clothes were ruined to say the least, Creedy had run up and gotten one of his own. A white one that nearly reached her knees, but had now moved up to reveal the exact part of her body she had not been ready to reveal yet…But who knows who had been present at her operation!

Willing herself against pulling away she tried to stay as still as possible, afraid to wake Creedy when he would obviously need the sleep as much as she did. He was beautiful asleep. Hell, he was beautiful awake! He looked worried though and she imagined the whole thing with Kayleigh and her rebel friends must have drained him completely. It had been awkward to watch him kill her, no matter how hard she wished to have done it herself…maybe that was just it. She'd never meant to burden him with this. It was so much easier killing than viewing a kill. But then again, maybe it had been his only way to find closure over that ordeal…

Amidst her mind's ramblings she noticed how his hand was still in the same place, gently spread out across her scarred belly, his warmth radiating on her skin. Much as she dreaded his reaction when he woke, she silently had to admit it felt nice having him this close, having him touch her like this. The first time ever, she smirked, someone actually hadn't pulled away in horror at seeing her disfigurements! Without knowing why she placed her smaller hand over his and saw him open a sleepy eye at her, then two.

"Hey you…been awake long?"

"Just a few minutes.."

"You slept OK? Your back doing OK?"

"I guess so, can't really judge with the morphine and all. It sure feels a lot better than this morning…well…OK, I had a knife pushed at my throat this morning…"

Suddenly his face turned gloomy, and she realised he was still feeling guilty.

"Creedy…don't do this to yourself all right? There's no way you could have foreseen this, no one could…"

"You did."

"Well, I wasn't exactly Miss Communication myself now, was I?"

He sighed. "No, you were not. It's hard figuring out the puzzle sometimes…"

She gave him a sharp look. "Is THAT where the Rubix remark came from?"

"Ah. You remembered that one, did you?"

"Hey I might have been drugged, but that doesn't mean my ears stopped functioning!"

She smiled at him as she turned to face him…and suddenly remembered the hand that was still there and was now moving along to her side, still under her shirt and still not flinching away. Creedy looked down at his hand only briefly before turning back to her face, trying to ascertain how much their position bothered her.

"You've seen…this…before this morning, haven't you?" She could hardly look him in the eye, but realised there was no way to escape the conversation now. If you ever want to give this a chance you've got to stop running!

"I helped Doc on your surgery Holly…"

She gasped for breath, yet managed to suck it in. "Oh. Right. That much."

"It…explained a lot I guess. Of what's been going wrong between us."

Us? Is he saying there's an us?

"So now you're gonna ask me how it ever got this bad eh?"

"I'm not gonna ask you anything. Except maybe to learn to trust me a bit more. If you're ready to talk about all that's happened to you, I'm here. If not…well then I guess I'm still here."

"That means a lot to me."

"I figured as much." He gave her a cautious smile as he tucked an insubordinate curl away behind her ear.

Holly realised she really liked this. Just lying here with him, quietly talking together…and still feeling his hand right there on her waist, knowing he must have seen the whole package and knowing he didn't care. So he's over it…how longs it gonna be before you get over yourself Holly Matthews?

"Holly?"

"Hmm?" Her eyes seemed to be closing of their own accord, as if his calm voice and never ending caress of her marred flesh lulled her back into slumber.

"Do you think there could be another chance for us? To get together I mean?"

Her clear blue eyes shot open again, suddenly wide awake by his words.

"You don't get it do you? You never lost me in the first place Creedy. We've both been acting stupid, and we both did some stuff I would much rather forget about, but…"

She bit her lip, knowing what she was about to say was horribly corny and could basically come straight from an old soap opera, but it would be the only right thing to say. The only thing that would make him understand her feelings.

"I've been yours since that night you first kissed me…"

If she had just told him the last of the dragons had died out spontaneously, he couldn't have looked more shocked. Surprised. Relieved. And ultimately happy.

His hand suddenly tangled her unruly mass of hair, gently pulling her closer as their lips touched once more. It was a perfect repetition of that night after dinner, only now all skeletons had been drawn out of the closet, and no dragons or rebels were about to attack. They had all the time in the world to reacquaint themselves and Creedy made sure he took all the time in the world. Pulling away for air he was happy to find a radiant smile upon her face.

"I love you Holly Matthews…I've done so from the moment you crashed into my life and nothing will ever change that."

As he spoke he saw her face cloud over again and he feared his declaration of love might have been ill received. But before he could speak again Holly pressed her soft fingers against his lips. "No, don't say anything, I already know you're gonna think I hate your guts…but I don't, it's just…My morphine's definitely worn off now and my back is fuckin' killing me…"

With a relieved sigh he gently kissed her forehead before reaching over to the night cabinet, where a fresh supply of morphine was waiting next to a bottle of water.

Holly happily accepted both before sinking down into his arms again and falling asleep almost immediately. She muttered something under her breath and Creedy strained to hear her correctly.

"I love you too…"