Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy IX…If you thought I did…go get your brain checked…
Rushi-chan: How did I know you would review this one too? -sigh-
KalmeKalica: Don't worry. I'm not really a fan of one-shots…So really, I would never write one. Besides, this isn't a end-in-one-chapter type of story, I'm gonna try to carry this through the entire time Zidane is gone. I'm glad you think it's pretty! (hope I spelled your name right. Tell me if I didn't)
Ripitupgenki: Short and to the point. Thanks! (hope I spelled your name right too!)
A/N: Thanks to all my reviewers! You all get smiley face stickers in the color of your choice 'cause this is the most reviews I've gotten forthe first chapter inmy current fics! (sad huh?-sniff-) Anyways, here comes Sekugi's CHAPTER FRIGGIN' TWO!
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I opened my eyes. I must have fallen asleep while writing…
I looked at the words I had written…The tune had come easily…but it was hard to find the proper words to express my innermost thoughts…
I looked out the window at the now pouring rain. I hadn't seen gloom like this in Alexandria in so many years. It wasn't even this bad after Bahamut was set against it.
It was as though all of Alexandria knew of the loss of a hero…
There was a knock at my door. I opened the door. There stood Beatrix.
She bowed low, "Your Highness. I-I…have some bad news."
I nodded for her to continue, though I…I had an idea as to what it was about…
The general hesitated, "It…seems that the Lifa Tree…had a…violent reaction…and that it has…c-collapsed…I'm terribly sorry, Your Majesty."
I didn't cry…no…I couldn't cry. You could only cry for so long…until the ability to cry…like lives… just…fades away…Besides…I-I already knew what had happened to him…I felt it…
Zidane…that kindness…that willingness to put yourself in danger for the sake of others…the things that made me love you so…in the end they…they killed you…
"If I may," Beatrix said, interrupting my thoughts, "is there not still a chance, however small, that Zidane lived?"
I looked up. Admittedly, I had no hope, but she had a point. There was still a chance!
I scribbled a small note on a spare piece of paper due to the promise I had made to Steiner the day before. As long as there was that small chance that Zidane lived…I would save my voice for him…that we might truly sing together…
Beatrix picked up the note, read it, and sighed, "If he is alive, wouldn't he come back on his own with his brother to help him?"
No one ever said Kuja's name any more. It had become an automatic taboo. It was just him with an emphasis or, the more polite version, "Zidane's brother" , which, in honor of Zidane's sacrifice, was the only I allowed in the castle.
I turned away. Maybe Beatrix was right…but then again…what if she was wrong…? Could I really risk that? When something as precious as Zidane's life was on the line?
I sighed and wrote more. I couldn't let him slip away from me…not again…
Beatrix's eyes scanned the words I had written, "Are you absolutely sure, Your Highness? Lifa's probably fairly unstable right now, it could be-"
I cut her off by slamming my fist down hard on the desk. I had to find Zidane…and no general, no matter how strong, was holding me back!
She stepped back in shock. Never had she seen me act like that ever before, and I hadn't really meant to, but desperate times call for desperate measures! She had to listen to me, there was no time for these doubts of hers!
Still slightly stunned, Beatrix backed from the room, "I-I'll prepare the invincible…Your Highness…"
I turned back to the window. Rain never seems to cease when your sad. They're like tears from the sky, bathing the land in an attempt to cleanse it of its pain and sorrow, which smothers and destroys it…It's like the heavens wished to help the people lick their wounds…
I looked back out the window. I looked down at the song on my desk and thought for a moment. I then added another verse. The more I wrote this song…the more I longed for him…
I began thinking back to the days I was with him not so long, of the things he'd told me…taught me…I could almost still hear his courageous words to Mikoto…
"We might be desperate insects to Kuja, but I'll show you how powerful we can be."
So you did Zidane…you defeated your older brother, but something inside you pulled you back to him…as if he called to you for help…though you claim he merely bade you farewell.
Why did you always help someone? It seems like you helped so many people inadvertently, but never realized it. Then…you just left us…
How cruel can fate get? How could it steal the one so many cared for, whether they would admit it or not…the one I loved…?
Love…now there is something cruel. You love someone with all your heart, fill your heart entirely with the memories of that person…then they're gone…They leave an empty heart in their wake, and yet…one is expected to move on? To forget that stabbing pain? How? How does one forget that horrible, piercing blade of truth that crashes through our dreams and leaves nothing but emptiness and sorrow in it's path?
I chuckled sadly. Why did I think on this so hard? Why was I prodding my unhealed wounds? Why did Zidane haunt my thoughts?
I closed my eyes.
Zidane…I…
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I felt his arms wrap around my shoulders from behind. I half-heartedly tried to push him away, but he only held tighter.
"Zidane…" I whispered, "Why do you do this?"
"What?" his sweet voice rang in my ears…I wanted to keep the sound forever.
"You hold me…It feels good in my mind…but…my heart…can't…"
He released me and took my shoulders, turning me towards him, "What do you mean?"
"Why do you always come?" I asked as those familiar tears wet my cheeks, "I…I want you, but I want the real you…not this dream. However sweet it may seem…it is still a dream…One that must inevitably end like all dreams…leaving barely even a memory…"
He gave me that disarming smile of his, "Then why do you call me?"
I turned away, "What do you mean?"
"A warrior always answers the call of his blade, Dagger." he said coolly, "You should know that!"
I smiled, "Am I to assume that I am the blade?"
"Yes."
"I don't remember having called anyone of late."
"See what happens when I'm gone?" he exclaimed with a laugh, "You've gone back to your proper speech. You're Garnet right now. I want my Dagger."
I sighed, "What reason is there to speak as a commoner would? I am a queen, not a traveler. 'Your Dagger' hasn't the heart to come out."
He shook his head, "I think she just doesn't want to see me."
"That's not true!" I yelled.
He smiled wider, "There she is."
I frowned, "So you come to mock me?"
He sighed sadly, "And there she goes. Why do you hide behind that speech and that queenly air? Why don't you trust what you see?"
"You're different. Not Zidane."
This time he turned away, "I know, Dagger. I know I'm not myself. I'm just having a bit of trouble, that's all…I promise I'll be back soon. Then I'll be more then a dream…promise."
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I looked up and sighed. Why did I do this to myself? Why did I…?
"Your Highness." came Beatrix's voice, "The Invincible is ready."
I nodded and turned back to that window.
Zidane...it's raining...but...not just from the sky...
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A/N: -sigh- another chapter gone by. Why it seems only yesterday I was dreaming it all up...
Oh well...REVIEW OR FACE MY WRATH!