Chapter 6
Chester the Vampire Strikes!
(A/N: Well, here's another chapter. It will probably be a while until the next chapter because I'm busy cooking up more ideas. I'm also working on two more fics at the moment: A Romp With the Death Eaters, and another one which doesn't have a title yet, but Lucius is having a slumber party and things go horrible wrong. It's weird, but so is this.
Anyway, adios for a while! Here's the ficlet!)
"...and then Plucky the two-headed gorilla jumped out of the bushes, brandishing his metallic claws and ate up everyone around the campfire. The End," Voldemort said as he finished his story.
It was campfire night, the Death Eaters were all huddled around the campfire exchanging spooky stories and eating marshmallows. Everyone looked around wide-eyed as if waiting for the two-headed gorilla to pop out of the bushes.
"Yeah, but what happened to Plucky?" said a frightened Peter Pettigrew who was so scared he was trembling. "Is he still alive or what?"
"They say Plucky still wanders these woods, hunting down bad little Death Eaters and eating them," Voldemort said. Everyone looked terrified.
"Well, I've got a better story," said a confident Snape.
Everyone turned to look at him as he began his story.
"Once upon a time, in dark woods very much like these there lived a fearsome vampire..."
"What was the vampire's name?" asked Lucius.
"Uh...wh...I don't know. That's not important," said Snape.
"But he has to have a name, doesn't he? A horrible, gruesome name that inspires fear."
"Fine, Lucius. Make something up then," said an annoyed Snape.
"Ok...Well, I've always been partial to the name Chester, myself."
"Oooh, Chester's a good name," said the surrounding Death Eaters in unison.
"Fine! Chester, the vampire was hunting the woods for blood one night when he came across a campfire, much like this one, with people, much like yourselves, surrounding it telling stories, much like the stories we've been telling..."
Lucius began to whimper. "What happened to them, Severus?"
"As you know, vampires can only be defeated by driving a wooden stake through their heart, much like the wooden stake I'm holding right now." Snape reached in his robes and pulled out a sharp wooden stake.
"So the people around the fire defeated the vampire using a wooden stake?" asked Lucius.
"Unfortunately, no one at the campfire had a wooden stake so they were all sucked dry, in a manner of speaking. The End."
"Well, it looks like we're out of marshmallows. I'm going to go get some more. I'll be back in a minute," said Voldemort and he swept off in a very evil fashion leaving the Death Eaters alone to ponder the story.
Just then something made a cracking sound in the woods.
"It's Chester!" screamed Lucius as he ran around the campfire screaming, his golden locks coming dangerously close to the fire. He tried to grab the wooden stake from Snape's hands.
"Sit down, Lucius!" yelled Severus as he jerked the stake away from him. "Chester isn't real. It's just a story. Pull yourself together."
Lucius sat down and began to sulk. Just then something jumped out of the woods behind them. Something wearing a billowing black cloak. It was Chester!
All of the Death Eaters ran away screaming, leaving Snape at the campfire. He brandished the wooden stake and drove it into the vampire's cold, black heart.
"Ack!" Chester screamed in pain. "I'm not Chester! I was just kidding!"
Snape pulled the hood from Chester's face and gasped in shock. It wasn't Chester after all. It was the Dark Lord carrying a bag of marshmallows.
The Dark Lord slumped to the ground, bleeding profusely, the stake still in his chest. He began to laugh.
"You should've seen the look on your face!" he said while laughing hysterically.
An angry Severus kicked Voldemort in the head and walked away, unconcerned. There Voldemort died, bleeding and alone. The End.
So, what did you think? Spooky, huh?
Chester the Vampire Strikes!
(A/N: Well, here's another chapter. It will probably be a while until the next chapter because I'm busy cooking up more ideas. I'm also working on two more fics at the moment: A Romp With the Death Eaters, and another one which doesn't have a title yet, but Lucius is having a slumber party and things go horrible wrong. It's weird, but so is this.
Anyway, adios for a while! Here's the ficlet!)
"...and then Plucky the two-headed gorilla jumped out of the bushes, brandishing his metallic claws and ate up everyone around the campfire. The End," Voldemort said as he finished his story.
It was campfire night, the Death Eaters were all huddled around the campfire exchanging spooky stories and eating marshmallows. Everyone looked around wide-eyed as if waiting for the two-headed gorilla to pop out of the bushes.
"Yeah, but what happened to Plucky?" said a frightened Peter Pettigrew who was so scared he was trembling. "Is he still alive or what?"
"They say Plucky still wanders these woods, hunting down bad little Death Eaters and eating them," Voldemort said. Everyone looked terrified.
"Well, I've got a better story," said a confident Snape.
Everyone turned to look at him as he began his story.
"Once upon a time, in dark woods very much like these there lived a fearsome vampire..."
"What was the vampire's name?" asked Lucius.
"Uh...wh...I don't know. That's not important," said Snape.
"But he has to have a name, doesn't he? A horrible, gruesome name that inspires fear."
"Fine, Lucius. Make something up then," said an annoyed Snape.
"Ok...Well, I've always been partial to the name Chester, myself."
"Oooh, Chester's a good name," said the surrounding Death Eaters in unison.
"Fine! Chester, the vampire was hunting the woods for blood one night when he came across a campfire, much like this one, with people, much like yourselves, surrounding it telling stories, much like the stories we've been telling..."
Lucius began to whimper. "What happened to them, Severus?"
"As you know, vampires can only be defeated by driving a wooden stake through their heart, much like the wooden stake I'm holding right now." Snape reached in his robes and pulled out a sharp wooden stake.
"So the people around the fire defeated the vampire using a wooden stake?" asked Lucius.
"Unfortunately, no one at the campfire had a wooden stake so they were all sucked dry, in a manner of speaking. The End."
"Well, it looks like we're out of marshmallows. I'm going to go get some more. I'll be back in a minute," said Voldemort and he swept off in a very evil fashion leaving the Death Eaters alone to ponder the story.
Just then something made a cracking sound in the woods.
"It's Chester!" screamed Lucius as he ran around the campfire screaming, his golden locks coming dangerously close to the fire. He tried to grab the wooden stake from Snape's hands.
"Sit down, Lucius!" yelled Severus as he jerked the stake away from him. "Chester isn't real. It's just a story. Pull yourself together."
Lucius sat down and began to sulk. Just then something jumped out of the woods behind them. Something wearing a billowing black cloak. It was Chester!
All of the Death Eaters ran away screaming, leaving Snape at the campfire. He brandished the wooden stake and drove it into the vampire's cold, black heart.
"Ack!" Chester screamed in pain. "I'm not Chester! I was just kidding!"
Snape pulled the hood from Chester's face and gasped in shock. It wasn't Chester after all. It was the Dark Lord carrying a bag of marshmallows.
The Dark Lord slumped to the ground, bleeding profusely, the stake still in his chest. He began to laugh.
"You should've seen the look on your face!" he said while laughing hysterically.
An angry Severus kicked Voldemort in the head and walked away, unconcerned. There Voldemort died, bleeding and alone. The End.
So, what did you think? Spooky, huh?