Lois, Clark, Jason and Martha sat around the dinner table, where Martha and Jason were doing most of the talking. The grandmother and grandson fell into an easy rhythm, and Jason was excitedly talking about acing a test.
"I'm really good at science, but not so much at sports."
"I'm sure you'll get better at them when you grow older." Martha responded to the little boy.
Lois stole an occasional glance at Clark, who not once looked at her during the meal. Instead, his eyes were fixated on his son, and she caught a sad mix of admiration and longing on his face.
When it was time for bed, Jason and Lois took Clark's bedroom, and Clark was relegated to the living room. Fortunately he didn't need sleep as there was no way his 6'4" frame would fit the confines of the couch. He changed and flew off into the night.
Lois was awakened by a rustling noise outside. Reaching over towards Jason she found an empty space. She sat up. "Jason?" She called lightly, not wanting to wake Martha up. "Jason, where are you, honey?" She looked down at the floor and noticed his shoes were gone. Through the window she could just make out the faint outline of a tiny figure in the distance. She threw on her shoes, grabbed a light sweater and ran outside.
"Jason, honey, what are you doing? It's late, you should get back to bed."
"I can't sleep."
"You had long day, you need your rest." She noticed how her son's eyes seemed fixated on a structure adjacent to the house. "What is it, sweetheart?"
Jason pointed towards the barn. "Is there something in there?" Jason nodded.
Lois' curiosity overcame her caution and desire for sleep. She grabbed his hand and together they walked towards the barn. Opening the door, Lois felt around for a light switch but could find none.
"Over there." Jason pointed, but Lois couldn't see at what. She let him guide her to a far corner of the room. She caught the faint smell of cut grass and tripped over a hard, metallic object but steadied herself. Jason crouched down on the ground and a loud clang echoed through the barn. Then, a soft green glow filled the space before them. It took her a moment to realize just exactly what was causing it.
A crystal. A green crystal.
Jason reached down to pick it up, but Lois tried to pull his hand away.
He was too quick. Seeing the crystal in Jason's hand brought back a flood of memories. They were from happier times that she wished she could somehow recreate.
"Jason, that's not yours. Please put it back." Jason protested. In the darkness she could not see him hiding it underneath his shirt.
Lois grabbed his hand and started off back to the house, just in time to see Clark swoop down from the sky and land near the door.
"Superman?" Jason called.
Clark's eyes were fixated on the object in the boy's hand, his cape billowing in the wind. "Jason, how did you find that?"
He was clutching the crystal to his chest, the green light illuminating his face. He looked nervously over at his mom, whose disappointment he read plainly across her face.
"I don't know. I just knew it was there."
Clark's mouth hung wide open in surprise. "What?"
Lois listened to the exchange amused. It was rare treat to see Clark dumbfounded without pretending to be so.
Clark got down onto his knees, his eyes glowing with pride.
"Can I have it?" Jason asked, holding up the crystal.
Clark felt like a criminal for refusing the boy's request. "That," he pointed to the crystal, "is something very special to me. My father gave it to me. And when you're older, I'll show you what it's for. But right now I need to hold onto it. How does that sound?"
"Okay I guess."
Clark sought strength for his next question in Lois' eyes. "Jason, do you know who I am?"
"Uh huh, you're Superman. And Clark Kent." He added smartly.
Clark laughed nervously. Lois pressed a hand to her mouth, stifling her own laugh. Clark continued, "You're a smart boy. But what I need to tell you, what you're mom and I need to tell you, is that, well, I am also your father."
"I know," he said shyly. "Mommy told me. I don't have to call you daddy, do I?"
"No, you can call me Clark, if you'd like."
"Okay. 'Cause I already have a daddy." The words stung at his heart, but he knew they weren't meant to be cruel.
"I know." Sitting there before his son, knowing that his son knew who he was, overwhelmed him. "Do you think maybe I can get a hug?"
Jason's tiny arms wrapped around Clark, and the tears came streaming down his face. Jason handed the crystal back to his father.
"Does this mean I'm gonna be able to fly?"
Clark laughed, "I don't know."
"Jason, you need to get back to bed," Lois interjected.
"But I want to stay out here with you and Clark!"
"Now, Jason." She called gently.
"Okay," Jason replied dejectedly. The couple watched their son walk back into the house.
Lois reached out to touch the crystal in Clark's hand, caressing its smooth edges with her finger. "I remember when you showed that to me," she reminisced. "Why can't we be happy like that again? You know, I can't stay angry at you, no matter how hard I try."
"Lois, I'm sorry. I wish we could go back to the way things were before."
"Do you? Because I don't."
Her words startled him. "What?"
"If we are going to have a relationship, Clark, it's going to be on equal terms. Before, you had the upper hand. That stops right now."
He conceded, knowing she spoke the truth. "What do you propose?"
"You need to trust me to make my own choices. That when I say I choose to spend my life with you I do so freely with my eyes open. I'm not naïve, Clark. When you tried to make me forget, you tried to write my future for me. You need to trust me enough to believe that this is the life I want. Will you promise me that?"
He hesitated slightly. "I promise."
"Because the truth," her voice began to crack, "is that I love you. I always have. I've seen what my life could be like without you in it, lived it for five years. Don't condemn me to that fate."
He smiled, "I love you too."
Lois bit her lip, preparing herself for her next question. "I need to ask you something. Who was Lana Lang?"
He was jarred by the sound of her name and he slumped his shoulders, falling into a familiar Clark posture. "She was, uh, a young woman I cared very deeply for."
"She told me the two of you were once engaged. Is that true?"
Clark could see where this was going and sighed. "Yes. I thought I loved her."
"You wouldn't have considered marrying her if you weren't sure."
"I loved her." She knew him too well.
"So tell me, Clark," her voice filling with emotion again. "How could you see a future with her but not with me?"
"I knew Lana before I knew even who I was. What I was. I never told her about me, any of it."
"But she found out anyway."
"She did. But she was different then. She was warm, kind. But she changed in college. The more I got to know her, the more I knew I couldn't trust her."
"How did she find out about the red kryptonite?"
"I don't know. But she's a scientist. An astrophysicist."
"You don't hate her for what she did to you, do you?" It was not a question.
"I can't hate her Lois. In a way I feel responsible."
"How so?"
"The meteorites that killed her parents. They were caused by my arrival here."
"You had no control over that!"
"It doesn't change the way I feel."
Sometimes, Lois thought, his selflessness was really damn annoying.
"You know," Lois began, looking towards the house. "Jason will come around. He just needs time."
"I hope your right."
"Kids are resilient. They are full of surprises." With that Lois grabbed the front of his suit and pulled him in for a passionate kiss. She led him into the barn, and in doing so tripped over the same metallic object that nearly claimed her before. Suddenly, there was a soft click and the room was illuminated. A single string dangled from a bare light fixture high up against the wall.
"You, uh, just need to know where to find it," Clark said shyly.
Lois looked down at her feet, seeing the tip of a lawnmower protruding out from the wall. She collapsed on top of a bale of hay, and pulled him up towards her. They lay with their arms wrapped around each other.
"See, on the ceiling? How the wood is a slightly different color? Once, when I was about 15," Clark began, "I came crashing through the ceiling."
Lois laughed. "How did you manage that?"
"I wasn't always so good at control."
Lois laughed hysterically, enjoying the warmth of the man next to her. She listened intently to his childhood accounts. He was careful to avoid any mention of Superman. In turn, she talked about Jason, the difficult pregnancy, his health problems, but more than anything, the joy he had brought to her life. An hour quickly passed.
"You know, it's really late. We should get back inside." Lois stated reluctantly. She started to get up but Clark stopped her. He pulled her in for a light kiss. It quickly deepened, and he pulled her on top of him. To her recollection, this was the first time he had ever initiated intimate contact. She had always been the aggressor, the domineering woman who led the way. But as the kiss went deeper she was energized by his newfound assertiveness.
Clark cupped her face in his hands, pulling her in even closer. His kiss was soft and gentle but assured, and growing with more intensity. Lois reached behind his shoulders and pulled on the familiar clasps of his suit, peeling the top off his body. She slid her hands down his chest. He picked her up, wrapped her legs around his waist, and guided her gently down to the ground. His hands slid down the frame of her body, absorbing every curve, as if comparing the accuracy of his memories to the real woman.
All the times that they had made love, and all the nights afterwards that she had relived in her mind, never prepared her for this moment. For this time, she finally understood him. And, more importantly, she knew what she meant to him. Superman, the man of steel, she had to share with the world. But the farm boy, news reporter Clark Kent was hers alone.
TO BE CONTINUED