Disclaimer: hmmm… why does everyone hate "disclaimers" so much? Guess it's just another one of things that ill never understand… like why there r some people who hate the beatles, or why my sister ran from "chuckie" the mouse at "chuck-e-cheese" and hid under the table… yah…..

Authors note: sry, but in the last chapter I made a HUGE mistake that I didn't even notice until after I published the story. Birdy's hair is brown, not red. And her eyes r more of a brownish-greenish color. I forgot to change that. the original character used was a girl that's going in a future fma story. sry bout that.

Hamtaro (author): "Yaaaaay! People like my story so far!" (does happy dance)

Birdy: (ahem) "Let me explain. You see, this is the most luck she's had on a story. But this is also the first story she's actually uploaded that was not something that took days and days to think of the next chapter for."

Edo: "You don't have to get that happy."

Hamtaro: "Oh yessh I do! So SHUTUP!" (smacks Edo on head with mighty-mighty spatula). "The MIGHTY-MIGHTY SPATULA STRIKES AGAIN!"

Edo: "HEY! THAT HURT!"

Hamtaro: (Huggles Edo). "Don't worry Edo, I still luv you! But I luv my Aru-aru even more!"

Birdy: -sigh- "Aru-aru is the nick-name that she made up for her luv Alphonse…"

Hamtaro: "Aru-aru's my future husband! Thank you very much!"

Birdy: "Let's just get on with things…"

…and the story begins…NOW!

:EVENING:

It was now getting VEERRY late at the home of the homunculous, and still no luck. And by this time, they were giving up. Their brains were fried. Too much thinking.

The first to give up was Greed. Why? Cuz thinking AT ALL was too hard for him. He was almost dead from overusing his brain.

Then suddenly, Birdy had an idea! Which doesn't always happen…

Birdy: "I'VE GOT IT!"

Everyone jumped in surprise. It had been silent for several hours, so the noise scared them.

Edo: "What is it?"

Birdy: (points index finger towards sky) "Let's go see the 'Wizard'!"

Greed: "Like in the Wonderful Wizard of Oz?"

Birdy: (singing) "Because, because, because, because of the wonderful thing he does!"

Edo, Greed, Lust, and Birdy all linked arms and started skipping down the street of to the wizard of oz singing "We're off to see the Wizard! The wonderful wizard of Oz!" and whistling merrily. And let's just say that they got some pretty interesting stares from people down the street. They even scared several kids with there strange happiness.

Riza: "Colonel, there's someone here to see you."

Roy: "Send them in."

Riza: "Colonel… what are you doing?"

Roy: "uuuhhhh…. Nothing!"

Little did Riza know, it was definitely not nothing. But something.

Mustang crouched down behind his desk even more. Mustang was playing with his brand new "inst-a-magic" kit that he got through the very useful, AVON magazine. He was a regular with them.

Riza: "…?"

Although, Riza did not know! OH THE HUMANITY!

Edo: "LET US IN!"

Edo and the others were waiting impatiently outside of the Central HQ.

Birdy: "EDO! QUIT SWINGING YOUR SWORD AROUND!"

Edo was swinging his hand blade around at the guards because they refused to let them in. The guards said that it was because they were too suspicious looking, especially Edo because of his height.

Guard 1: "Get lost small-fry!"

Edo: "DON'T CALL ME SMALL!"

Birdy: (slaps hand on forehead) "Oi…"

Lust on the other hand was off hitting on one of the other guards… sigh…because he looked like her ex…Ronald McDonald…(but obviously he wasn't)

Birdy: "I don't think they are going to let us in if we keep this up, Edo-kun…"

Edo: "Then what do YOU suggest?"

Birdy: "…well…why don't you just try showing them your state alchemist watch?"

Edo: "Oh…right…"

Edo looked down out of embarrassment for the obvious lack of thinking. Why hadn't he thought of doing that sooner?

Edo reached down into the front pocket of his leather pants digging for his state alchemist watch. Which took a lot of digging, since there was so much gum, tic-tacs, and many other miscellaneous objects in his pocket. Since when was the last time he cleaned it out? Better question, when was the last time he ever washed his pants?

Birdy noticed the many grotesque things being flung out of Edo's pocket.

Birdy: "Edo, since when did you last wash your pants?"

Edo: "Uuuhhh… I don't know… New Years?"

Birdy: "Ewww…"

Birdy stepped back a couple of feet out of disgust.

Gross… She thought to herself. But then again, I'm not surprised.

Edo: "What's with that face?"

Birdy: "Oh nothing…"

But of course it was hard for her to hide her grossed-out-ness. She was doing everything she could to keep herself from getting sick all over Edo's clothes. But that would just make matters worse now wouldn't it?

Well, at least then he'd HAVE to wash his clothes… LOL…

"Found it!" After digging through all the gunk that was in his pocket, Edo finally found his watch.

Edo looked at Birdy confused. "Now what?"

"Go show it to the guards, you dipstick!" Birdy said as calmly as she could. This is soooo frustrating.

"Oh, right!"

Edo scurried up to the guard (who for some reason didn't see what was happening earlier). He showed the guard his license.

"I'm a the Fullmetal Alchemist! I need to see Colonel Mustang."

"All of you?"

"Yes."

"Even that guy by the bush over there?"

"Huh?"

The guard pointed to a rose bush in a corner. The guy that he was pointing at was Greed. Greed was over talking to the rose bush.

Lust: (who decided to stop flirting with that other guard) "Oh my god…"

Birdy: "…"

Edo leaned on one foot and scratched his head. "Jeez Greed…"

He turned back to the guard.

"Yeah, even that guy."

The guard opened the gate to HQ and let the four of them through.

"Go on."

Edo, Lust, Greed, and Birdy rushed by the guard. Birdy was last because she was the only one who remembered her manners and took to the time to thank the guard.

"Thank you Mr.Guard sir!"

"Hmph…"

Birdy ran as fast as she could to catch up with the others. But Birdy is very slow. And because she is so slow, her running looked more like slow-mo power walking.

"You might want to hurry up girl!"

Birdy looked over her shoulder panting, with an angry expression.

"pant…I am! pant…Shut up!" She gave the guard a sign that was...well...let's just say a certain (ahem) sign...

BANG! BANG! BANG!

Mustang: "Luetenant Hawkeye, who is that banging on the door?"

Riza: "I think it's them colonel."

Mustang: "Oh. Send them in."

As Riza went over to let them in, Mustang fumbled through his mail-order magic kit hurriedly, trying to put it up before Edo could see it.

If Edo and Birdy saw this, then they would want one too, and they'd try to steal mine from me! Mustang laughed menacingly to himself. Well, I won't let them take it from me!

Not like they really would want it…

Or WOULD they?

Hmmm…

The plot thickens!

DUN-DUN-DUUUUUUN!

"I'm gonna break this door down!"

Birdy crossed her arms in amusement.

"Okay Edo-kun. Go right ahead!"

Birdy stepped back from the door to give Edo room to charge.

Edo backed up a few feet to gain momentum for his high-kick that he was going to use to BREAK THE DOOR DOWN!

"Alright!" Edo ran at the door at full speed!

"RAAAAAAAAH!" Edo jumped up off the ground and was going to give the door a jump-kick, when Riza coincidentally opened the door right before Edo would've hit the door. Causing Edo to crash-land into Mustang's office.

Birdy and Lust looked at Edo from the other side of the door with weird expressions. Greed however, was now having a rather (ahem) interesting conversation with a nearby fern.

Mustang leaped up from his desk. Since he didn't have enough time to hide his magic wizard kit, he hid it behind his back.

Mustang: "F-fullmetal! W-w-what brings you here?"

Edo: (looks at Mustang with an expression that says 'what's with you?')

Mustang: "What? Why are you looking at me like that?"

Edo: "Because you seem very suspicious, that's why."

Mustang: "Oh…"

Edo: "Are you hiding something?"

Mustang was sweatin' bullets. He looked around the room nervously.

Mustang: "Of course not! I-I'm not hiding my 'inst-a-magic kit' that I ordered from AVON magazine behind my back! Why, that's preposterous!

Lust: "Wait! Did you just say that you WEREN'T hiding your 'new inst-a-magic kit that you got from AVON magazine behind your back'?

Mustang: "No."

Lust's face turned into a care-free expression.

Lust: "Oh! Okay then!"

Birdy stepped into the room. "Anyways, the reason that we're here is because we're on our way to see the Wizard of Oz!"

Mustang: "For what?"

"Well, Envy went into an emotional break down, so we are trying to snap him out of it by seeing if the Wizard of Oz can do anything that can help him."

Mustang: "Oh. I see."

Edo looked up at Mustang. "You do?"

Mustang: "No."

Edo: "Oh."

Birdy put her hands on her hands and shifted her weight to her left foot. "Well actually it's more like we were going to go see him, but…"

Mustang: "…?"

Birdy: "We decided that the Wizard of Oz is WAAAY too far, so we thought that coming to Central HQ would be the next best thing."

Mustang: "Oh! I see!"

Edo: "Really? You do?"

Mustang: "No."

Edo glared at Mustang with an annoyed stare.

Edo: "…"

Mustang: "What?"

Edo: "Nothing…"

Mustang: "Oh okay then!"

Lust: "Anyways, is there any way you can help us?"

Mustang was shocked! They want my help? Nobody had ever asked for his help (much less wanted it) ever since the granny's at the old folks home asked him to help in their bake sale, and he accidentally mixed up the jar labeled "sugar" with the jar labeled "anthrax"! He was shocked!

A light from the heavens shown through his office window. Bells were ringing! The angels were singing! Oh happy day! Someone actually wanted Mustang's help!

Edo, Birdy, and Lust shielded their eyes from the ray of light (Greed was still talking to the plant).

Birdy: "Where's that freaky light coming from?"

Edo: "From the heaven's above!"

Lust: "Actually, I think it's from that spotlight that they are shining at that cinema theatre from across the street. A new movies coming out. We should go see it later."

Edo: "Oh."

Birdy: "Really? A new movie is coming out? What's it about?"

Lust: "A talking dog."

Edo jumped up and down excitedly like a fat kid in a candy store. "Let's go let's go let's go let's go! Let's go see it! I LUV TALKING DOGS!"

Both Birdy and Lust stared at Edo like he was some kind of idiot.

Edo stopped jumping in mid-air and asked "What?"

Both girls answered in unison: "Oh…nothing…nothing at all…"

ANYWAYS:

Mustang got up from the floor with a huge smile on, and his face surrounded by sparkles (just like Armstrong!). He walked up to Edo and Birdy proudly.

Mustang: "Actually, I can help you!"

All three turned around surprised. "You can?"

Mustang: "Oh yes, I can!"

Lust: "How?"

Mustang: "Well you see, I just so happen to have a magic kit of my own! And I'll bet that I can help you, seeing as how I am the best wizard in the WORLD!

Edo looked at Mustang in aw: "Awww…"

Mustang jumped onto his desk.

But…

…

…well…

…He kinda….

Knocked off his entire magic set….

…and…

…..spilled all the potions everywhere! Whoopsies!

Mustang: "Whoopsies!"

Birdy: (Blood vein pops out of head) "…you…effing…IDIOT!"

Sweat drops formed over everyone's head.

(sigh)

…will they ever find a way to cure Envy of his panic attack AND his fear of teddy bears? And why has Greed been talking to plants recently? Find out…..

……..sometime in the near future!

………well…………..EVENTUALLY!

I'm sry for this chapter being soooo boring compared to the first one. It's almost 2:30 a.m. so… I'm gonna quit for the night. I'll start on my third chapter after I publish this in the morning. I mean, I've really got nothing else better to do anyways… so…yeah…whatevs…

Oh, and I'm sry about seeming so bitter at the end of the last chapter. I was worried that people would leave bad reviews, so I tried to make just as-clear-as-possible that I really didn't want any flames. But now, I don't care as much. Oh, and sry about all the grammatical errors in the chapters. It's cuz sometimes I'll type properly, and then other times I just don't feel like it. Well, I PROMISE THE NEXT CHAPTER WILL BE A LOT BETTER! ……..oh great, I probably just jinxed it…………………………………………..dang.