Disclaimer: Everyone would need serious psychiatric help if I owned High School Musical.

A/N: Ok, the main point of this story is to be therapeutic to me…..and to scare everyone else. I write because it relaxes me….even if the result is at the expensive of others. I do not recommend this story if you have heart problems, are pregnant or may become pregnant, or happen to be sane……..if you do not fall into this category then I hope you enjoy……side affects may include nausea, nose bleeds, or uncontrollable laughter……if none of these happen to you…well then, it sucks to be you……

Much Love!

TillThatTime

I Want a Hippopotamus For Christmas.

The entire elevator was watching in a bewildered awe as Gabriella began banging her head repeatedly into the wall. She was mumbling incoherently, but if they listened hard enough they could make out such phrases as, "kindergarten", "Start of something new my ass." and "What about celery?"

Ryan: Hmmm, do you think we should stop her?

Ryan mumbled, cocking his head to the side.

Troy: And miss out on this?

Troy said in great amusement, pointing suggestively at the eccentric girl.

Sharpay: Besides, she might knock herself out again, and I've run out of shoes.

Just then, with a disappointed groan from everybody in the elevator, Gabriella abruptly stopped and turned to face everyone. She swayed slightly and her eyes defocused, but a psychotic grin was plastered on her face.

Gabriella: I've got it! Troy, you once told me that you like corn……well, I LOVE corn! Don't you see that we're meant to be now?

Troy: Oh baby, come here.

Troy said in a gentle voice, holding out his arms to the grinning banshee of a girl. She quickly walked into his outstretched arms with a contented sigh. He ran his fingers through her hair before saying softly.

Troy: Baby….I was lying….I hate corn….it gives me rashes.

Letting out a, not so unlike Xena Warrior Princess cry, Gabriella, not only grabbed Troy's hair tie and ate it, but broke his cookie in half as well.

Kelsi: Weird…..

Zeke: I know, you think she would have done that the other way around.

Chad: Me, Chad

Sharpay: Oh, why don't you go commit suicide.

Chad: There's no rope.

Sharpay: but..

Chad: Or razors

Sharpay: Well…

Chad: Or pills

Sharpay: Please…

Chad: Or emo music playing in the back round.

Sharpay: Jesus Christ! Forget it!

Chad: Forget what?

Back to the situation at hand, Troy watched in horror as Gabriella destroyed his most prized possessions before letting out a shriek and snapping his fingers in that 'oh girl, no you didn't' type of way.

Troy: Oh girl no you didn't!

See….

Gabriella: Oh yes, Troy, I think I did.

Troy: Oh it's on, girlfriend.

Sharpay: Wow Troy, you've truly out gayed yourself…..

In a flurry of popular 'bitch slap' sayings and undignified squeals, Troy lunged at Gabriella. The song 'Smack My Bitch Up' began to play on the over head speaker as Troy pulled at Gabriella's hair and Gabriella started biting Troy's leg.

Ryan: Is anyone else finding this incredibly amusing?

Everyone raises their hands except Kelsi, Troy and Gabriella.

Kelsi: Oh come on guys, stop fighting. This is definitely not Disney friendly, and plus 'We're all in this together'…….Right?

Sharpay: Actually I'd rather be living in a secluded area in Guatemala, having hot, kinky sex with some Jamaican dude who's name I couldn't even begin to pronounce.

Ryan: I second that….

Everyone else nods in a agreement, except for Taylor.

Taylor: But why would there be a Jamaican dude in Guatemala?

Sharpay: Get the hell out of my fantasy, Velma-wannabe, before I forcibly take you out.

Taylor crouches back in fear.

Taylor: Sorry.

Sharpay: Sorry what?

Taylor: Sorry your majesty.

Zeke: I'd rather be roasting small animals on a sacrifice flame, whilst carving 'The Dark Lord + Zeke Forever', into a nearby tree.

Troy momentarily stops poking Gabriella's eyes, in order to stare at Zeke, along with everyone else.

Zeke: Uh, I mean…

Sharpay: Praise Jesus……yeah we know…

Ryan: Closet Satanist.

Zeke: What did you call me?

Ryan: Uh, incredibly psychotic, douche-cock, panty-waist pansy?

Zeke: Oh, ok.

Sharpay: How long have we been on this elevator?

Taylor: About 4 hours

Sharpay glares at Taylor, tapping her foot expectantly.

Taylor: Master...

Sharpay: That's better...now fan my face.

Taylor: What?

Sharpay: Do it, sweater monkey!

And of course, since Sharpay is so obviously the 'Head Bitch' Taylor begins to fan Sharpay's sweaty...I mean, charmingly misty face.

Until suddenly...

AND I HAVE DECIDED TO ABRUPTLY END THE CHAPTER HERE, BECAUSE I'M THE AUTHOR AND I CAN DO THAT SORT OF THING……..