Ch 18

Many more years passed. Frodo married a lovely girl a few years after we returned home from Rivendell. Three years later, he had his first child, a son named Samwise. Sam was very surprised by this but Frodo only said, "I think it's only right to named my first born son after the man who raised me for thirty-nine years." Sam was very pleased with this and took a special liking to little Samwise. Frodo and his new wife, Lily came to visit us a lot and brought their son along with them. It was another moment when I knew that Frodo would have been very proud.

Rose married only a few months after her brother and had her first child only eleven months later. It was a boy as well that they decided to name Aragorn. Rose said that this was because of the impression King Elessar had made on her in Rivendell.

Bilbo married about a year later and his wife had twins two years later, which they named Berythna and Arwen. I was very surprised at this and as Sam had taken a special liking to little Sam, I took a liking to little Berythna and Arwen.

Athelas married about a year after her brother did and had her first child about five years later, which they decided to name Rose.

One night after supper, Sam and I realized for what seemed to be the first time that we were completely alone and that life would never be the same.

"I'm feeling very old," Sam told me. "I felt that way when Athelas got married and now ten years later, I feel it even more. I'm eighty years old, Berythna, and I have a feeling I'm not going to live much longer."

"I know what you mean, Sam. I don't think I can manage much longer either. I have a desire to see Frodo again, and Lord Elrond once told me that we would be reunited after death."

"I can't wait to see Rosie again. I guess it's the only thing we have left now. Our children all have lives of their own and seem to be very happy. Now all we can do is wait for our own death. It's so depressing, Berythna, if you take my meaning."

"I know, Sam. We've had a good life. I feel so old inside, and though I still look like I did the day we met, I don't feel like it. I feel so old and fragile anymore, like I could break if I'm not careful. I should like to lay down my life soon."

"You said you would wait until after I was gone. Well, I don't think you'll have to wait too much longer."

I nodded.

About three weeks later, Sam came to me one evening and said that he was feeling tired and was going to go to bed early. Before he left, he said, "I love you, Berythna. I always have. You've been a good wife and the best friend I could ever have wished for. Good night."

For some reason, when he told me good night, I knew he meant goodbye. When I went to join him in bed about three hours later, he was already gone.

I slept in Frodo's old room that night and the next morning, I quietly walked to his new home to tell him about his father. His wife answered the door.

"Hello, Mom," she said with a smile, carrying my new grand daughter in her arms.

"Hello, Lily. Is Frodo home?"

"I'm here, Mom," I heard Frodo say as he came up behind his wife. "What is it?"

"Sam is dead. He died last night."

He threw his arms around me and cried. After a while, he whispered, "Come on, Mom. Let's go get the rest of the family."

After all of my children were together, we made our way back to Bag End and grieved for their father.

The funeral was a couple of days later. I stayed with Frodo and Lily for a couple of weeks after Sam died. The sight of my grandchildren made me happy, especially little Samwise, who was now twenty years old.

"When are you two going to stop having children?" I asked Frodo one night as we sat at the table eating dinner. "You'll have to buy a bigger place before long."

"I think this is our last one," Frodo replied, nodding to little Daisy who was sleeping peacefully in her mother's arms. "Though, I'm not sure. Lily and I would like to have a big family."

"Eight children already! And you want more? Sam and I wanted more children after Athelas was born, but for some reason, I could never conceive again after that. I had trouble having your sister, though. Maybe that was the reason I couldn't have anymore, but I always felt bad because Sam wanted more children and I couldn't have anymore."

"Mom, you sound tired," Lily said. "Why don't you go to bed."

"It is more than fatigue, my dear," I replied. "I am old. Old beyond mortal years. I was old when I married your father, Frodo. If the other children are not busy tomorrow, I would like to have a family meeting. I have something I wish to discuss with all of you."

The next afternoon, while all of my twenty-three grandchildren played outside with each other, I sat in Frodo's living room with only my children around me for comfort. I was at peace and I knew that I had made the right decision.

"My beautiful children, you were always the light of my life and I love you very much. I have called all of you here today to tell you something very important. I am going to die soon, and I need to explain what I need for you to do.

"I can still remember the day I met your father, Frodo. He was so handsome with those big blue eyes that you have inherited from him. It was nothing short of love at first sight, for both of us, but I was to go to the Undying Lands with the elves only weeks after I met your father. I gave this up because I loved him so much and after the War of the Ring, we were married. We lived a very short but happy life together, but then that awful illness spread throughout the Shire and before help could arrive, Frodo died.

"Then I found out I was with child. It was a mixture of happiness and sorrow, for I was upset that your father never even knew of your existence, Frodo. But the first moment I held you in my arms, it was love at first sight once more and life started becoming more bearable.

"The day I married Sam was one of the happiest days of my life. We spent many wonderful moments together and had three beautiful children, which grew up right before my eyes in what seemed like a matter of minutes rather than years.

"When you all got married, your father and I were very happy for all of you, but we were also very sad. You were gone, all of you, starting a new life with the one you loved just as Sam and I had done the same years ago. We missed you all very much, and your father told me about three weeks before he died that he felt life ending and that he would not live much longer. He was so proud of you, all of you, and he loved you all equally, even though not all of you really belonged to him.

"As part elven, I have a choice. I can linger on for many years to come, but they would be very hard on me and hard on you as well. I do not want you to watch your mother slowly fade away into nothing, as Rivendell has probably done by now. I plan on traveling to Rivendell alone within the next few months to willingly lay down my life and die. Don't protest, Frodo. I have already made up my mind. You all do not need me anymore. You are all grown and have children of your own. I will give you four more months to say goodbye and then I will be off to Rivendell to lay down my life and die.

"About a week after I leave, I want you to set out toward Rivendell. You will find my body laying in my old room on the settee, if it is still there. I want you to bury me there in Rivendell by the waterfall, which when we were there last was only a little stream. Now, it is probably completely dried, but nevertheless, I shall rest in peace there. Do not cry, Rose. Everything is going to be all right. Think of it this way. I will be with Sam and Frodo once again when I die and I will be happy."

Four months passed quickly and they were good. My children came at least once a week to visit me and we carried on pretty much like we had been. I gave Bag End to a family who I knew needed more space drastically, and Bag End could give it to them. I moved in permanently with Frodo and Lily. The night before I was to leave, my children all came out and we had dinner outside under the summer stars. It was fine weather for traveling and I was eager to leave the next morning.

That morning, I bid my children and grandchildren farewell and began my journey. It only took a week to reach my destination, now that the roads were clear of any evil abroad and when I saw Rivendell, tears began to trickle down my face.

It was slowly becoming a barren wasteland just as Lord Elrond had predicted. The trees were falling and there were no flowers. The waterfall where my body would lay was no more and the gates were crumbling, but the House of Elrond stood majestically and defiantly against the setting sun. For some reason, I knew it would always be there no matter what the changes brought to this world.

I rushed inside and up the staircase, feeling younger and younger as I went. When I finally reached my room, I took one last look around, wrote a last farewell letter to my children, and then laid on my settee and closed my eyes. I could hear Lady Arwen's voice, and then the majestic voice of Lord Elrond. I could hear Frodo laughing and I could see myself as a young elf coming to Rivendell. I could see Frodo embrace me after the War of the Ring. I could see our wedding and feel his lips upon my body. I could see Bag End and my son as I first held him in my arms. I could see my marriage to Sam and I could see our friends who had already gone to the grave, Pippin and Diamond and Rosie and Merry and Estella. I could see my other children and Gandalf. Last of all, I could see Sam looking at me and beckoning me to join him.

"I'm ready, my love. Take me to you."