Title: That Damn Happiness Clause
Writer: Azure K Mello
Disclaimer- I don't own the shoes I'm currently dancing in what's the likelihood I own anything in Joss' universe? I own the original novels. . . I bought them in Borders, and I own the DVDs. I don't however make money off of this I just seem to spend a lot on it. I in no way intend to infringe copyrights. I'm just entertaining myself, honestly, I'm shocked that anyone's read it.
Setting: somewhere during I Will Remember You, some conversation is mangled out of said ep. And in Buff's time line it's at the thanksgiving ep.
Note: Bannoffee is not a flavor in America much to my brother's chagrin bannoffee is banana toffee flavor. I don't like banana but for some reason bannoffee rocks my world.
Warning: SLASH Angel/Doyle. Spike/Xander. Don't like, don't read, don't flame. Also rather heavy mentions of abuse.
Thanks to Poison for being the fastest Beta I've ever had!
Section rating: R
Part 10/?
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"Yours?" Xander asked with a smile. "Don't be silly I already was."
"Well now that's obvious to everyone. All it is at this point though is a pledge. This doesn't have to happen if you don't want it to."
"What do I have to do to make it happen?" Spike said nothing but vamped. He looked away from Xander shamed by his inhumanity. The boy took his face in his hands and kissed him thoroughly. He examined all the planes of Spike face with his lips and tongue. His lips left slight hints of blood on the vampire's face. As Spike pulled back slightly he bit into the base of his thumb with razor like teeth.
He held out the digit to Xander. "All you need to do is drink. Realize now that this is forever. We don't need to do this if you feel in any way uncomfortable."
"I was yours before we even met," Xander said as he eyed Spike thumb. "This isn't going to turn me is it?"
"God, no. Don't you think I'd warn you if it did that? Like, 'oh, hey Xanpet, just a little note.' This won't change you in anyway. I wouldn't let that happen."
"You mean you wouldn't want?"
"Fuck, no! I want you, pet. You are my custom made perfect mate. Any other you just wouldn't be the same. And if you got really badly attacked and there was no time to get you to the hospital, then yeah maybe I would turn you because I couldn't bear to have you die in my arms. But I love you all heat filled and innocent."
"I'm not innocent!" Xander said. Spike just smiled as he held his thumb out. Xander rolled his eyes but sucked hard on the digit. The taste was pure magic: heat and power, love and anger, pain and grievance all mixed together with a touch of metal and salt. He pulled away when Spike tugged a little.
"Anyone who sees you will know. And if they see me they'll be envious as hell cause I've got your name all over me and they'll know there is no point in trying to seduce you."
"Anyone?"
"Well not the normal pedestrians but anyone the least bit other worldly will. Witches, demons, watchers; everyone in the know."
"Would Cordy? Would the Scoobies be 'in the know'?"
"Cor would probably just feel slightly weird around you. She'd know there was something different about you, but she'll most likely decide you got new shoes." He saw the look in Xander's eyes. "A slayer would know, but I don't know if *Buffy* would she's clueless and she never received the handbook." He smiled gently.
"It wouldn't matter if she could," Xander said as he slid back into bed. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"So wait. Let me get this right," Doyle said slowly. "I had a vision 'bout Buffy and now you're gonna go save 'er? Can't you jus' give 'er a ring and tell her to watch 'erself?"
"Because we don't just call people when you have a vision. The Powers want me there. If it makes you feel any better I won't see her at all. Though it doesn't matter as the only person I want is right here."
"I know, it's just . . . she's really pretty, Angel. I saw 'er in the vision."
"You're right she's very pretty, but I love you and nothing can change that or threaten that."
"I know. I'm just scared for you. The vision wasn't fun. Indian ghosts, only hurt by their own weapons."
"I'll be home by tomorrow night," Angel said, his hands running down Doyle's arms. "If Xander and Spike come in, I know they don't really need to be here, but they've had two days off and they must be going stir crazy. Maybe you can find them something to do." Angel kissed the boy softly as he picked up his bag. "Home soon, promise." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The alarm went off and Xander tried to kill it. As he thrashed it into silence he rolled over to Spike and winced, sore from the night before. He smiled at the memory of feeling loved and completed and safe in the arms and body of another person. Sighing he kissed Spike's neck. "We should go in to work."
"Do we have to? Can't we forgo it as a post coital act?"
"We could but as we haven't really gone to work since we got back from Sunnydale three days ago we should make an appearance."
"Good point," Spike said, making no move to get up. He ran his fingers over Xander's stomach and felt the strained muscles that he knew weren't there purely from sexual exertion. "What's wrong, baby?"
"Weird dreams. Are we married now? I died in the dream and you were the only person to know and Buffy came and she couldn't remember me and you got so angry and you screamed, 'My mate and husband is dead and you don't remember his face?!?' and it was odd. No one remembered me. More unsettling than scary."
"Hey people would be upset if you died!"
"Yeah you." He said it seriously with no malice or anger in his voice, the lack thereof upset Spike more than it's presence would have.
"The Sunnydale crew would care. Not as much as they should, but that's their lose. And yes, I would mourn you - in fact, I wouldn't be there because I'd have staked myself. I would grace your body with my ashes and feel as the last of your heat ebbed away. And even though you don't realize it, all of Angel Investigations would mourn you. They like you, Xander. They would like you even more if you let them know you. I know it's hard not to guard yourself from others, but they're not the folks from the dale. Cordelia likes you. She sees you the way no one back there ever did. Maybe because you guys dated or whatever, maybe just because she wasn't so busy worshiping the goddess that is Buffy like the rest were, I don't know, but she does. And Doyle, while I make fun of him, is a nice boy. He wants to be your friend; I think he's another guarded individual. Doyle isn't that much older than you, he's still a boy and maybe there's a dark past but, honestly, who in our little group is completely unscathed? And hell, we must need some friends. I mean, Christ, I know he loves the man but can you imagine how hard it is to live with broody? And finally Angel, the patriarch of our little group likes pretty much everyone, he likes you, Xan, he always has. He thinks you've got spunk, my word not his. But yes, I guess we sort of are married; as much as a vampire can be. But it's more permanent than marriage. Are you freaked?"
"No, kinda, but not in the way you think. Does it scare me that I'm 19 and married? Not in the least. Am I freaked because it's you? Fuck, no. It's just, what happens when I die? How permanent are we talking?"
"Well it all depends. If it is allowed to, the connection between us won't let you die until I do. You won't age beyond thirty-ish but you'll still be human. Um. but if you don't want that or it scares you it won't happen. You'll age and die just as any other human would. It's not an issue really. You don't have to decide or anything, subconsciously your body will decide what you really want and act thusly."
Swallowing hard Xander wandered what the next three hundred years or so would bring, he had every intention of seeing them. More over he never want Spike's ashes to "grace his corpse feeling his heat ebb away" he couldn't bear to do that to this man. He would not leave him alone. "I do hope you realize you've just won yourself a Xander Harris in the ring throw game that is eternity." Spike beamed. Xander hated that smile because it was just proof that Spike didn't expect him, Xander, to be willing to spend that long with him. Standing he peeped out of the curtain and whistled, he threw the blinds back and there the window framed a gloomy LA day, there was no sun and very little light. "This is good. I wanted us to walk to work because I wanted to stop at a pawn shop."
"You want to pawn something? Is to get money to start our life together with?" Spike asked in a false shrill voice.
"No I want to buy something. What's your ring size?"
Spike opened his mouth, his jaw hanging open. "You're buying wedding bands from a pawn shop? That's so . . . me. We can get them somewhere real if you want them."
"No, listen up, Mr. Poet, I just . . . Well every dream I ever had got stolen until I came out here. So why can't the perfect symbol of my changed luck be stolen? I think there is some poetic justice, or injustice depending on the angle at which you stand."
"I think it sounds fucking brilliant. But we should ask the guy to only show us stuff he's had for over a year. 'Cause what if some poor young girl pawned it to pay for her husband's heart transplant and then couldn't get the money to get it out of hock? But if it's been there a year, she's left hubby and aint comin' back for the ring."
"I want one that has something inscribed in it. The more personal and cryptic the better."
"That's a little sick, Xan. And I'm the mass murderer." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The devious duo walked in at about eight. Angel had been gone for and hour and Cordy wouldn't be in for another. At the desk he sat playing with Angel's clock and brooding. He smiled as the guys came in, anything to get his mind off the Dark Avenger. Xander sat down next to him. Doyle looked at him looked at Spike and then back again. "Congrats," he said and went back to the clock after glancing at the ring on Xander's left hand. He watched as Spike nodded and walked stiffly to get coffee. "Long night?" he asked Xander with a leer.
The boy just smirked. "Where's Angel?" he asked amiably, keeping in mind what Spike had said about the boy's lack of friends.
"Sunnydale."
"That sucks, poor Angel! He'll be home as soon as possible, I assure you he won't stay a moment longer than is absolutely necessary. Been gone long?"
"Hour." Doyle said, slightly surprised at the boy's interest.
"And you've been alone? Oh, then it's time to go have some fun. Strip club or pancake joint? It's up to you. I know two very fine establishments."
"I'm over liquor."
"Wendy's House of Flap it is then."
"It's a dry strip joint?" asked a confused Doyle.
"Flap as in flapjacks. Wendy can do amazing things with a skillet. Grab a coat, it's kinda drizzly." Doyle stood there and looked at him open mouthed. "Doyle don't look at me like that, looking at me like that says you're thinking: wow, and normally he's such an asshole. Angel's out of town, there is nothing to kill, and I just got married all of these things lead to copious amounts of syrupy goodness."
"You just got *what*?" Cordelia asked from the door where she stood at the shockingly early time.
"Married, isn't that great?" Spike said, wrapping an arm around her waist. "Now he's wearing a ring that has 'forever in the darkness and always with you 1984' carved into it."
"Why?"
"We found it in a pawn store and liked it. It's very us don't you think?" Spike asked jovially.
"You angry, Cor?"
"Well I would have liked to have been in the know. I mean you didn't even have a service! I have shoes that would be great for a wedding."
Spike just laughed. "Wanta come get breaka with us?"
"No, I'll stay and do the phones. We might get a paying customer. Where are you going?"
"Wendy's House of Flap," Xander supplied.
"Oh! Would you bring me back some of her caramel walnut pancakes? Those are amazing." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The three sat in comfortable silence passing syrup and cutting bites. "See," Xander said finally, "wasn't this worth leaving the office for?" He cut into his chocolate, chocolate chip, chocolate sauce covered waffles.
"Hell, this is worth sending Angel to Sunnydale for. God if we could come here every time I had a vision, I would force 'em," Doyle said, eating bannoffee flavored hotcakes.
Spike's mouth was too full of coconut-honey French toast to comment clearly. "Ho ow fi we plac?"
"How'd I find this place?" Xander translated for Doyle who wasn't quite so used to the vampire's speech when distorted through fangs and food. Spike had vamped out at first bite and seemingly forgotten to change back. "Um, I ran away with Jess summer between eighth grade and high school, we planned and were prepared and we rented the upstairs room here. I don't know if it could be considered running away though as we went back a week before school and no one had noticed we were gone except Willow." He laughed, as did Doyle. Spike looked puzzled. "It's a human practice to laugh at awful childhoods in hindsight. Honestly, join us, Spike, it's fun. Anyway it was a great three months and I gained fourteen pounds living upstairs. This was always a favorite of mine," he said pointing at his plate.
Spike nuzzled his neck with his nose. "How can you enjoy that? Isn't it a chocolate over load to your palate?"
"The batter is milk, the chips are bittersweet, and the sauce is dark: it's a medially. And you know it, you're just wheedling for a bite without having to actually ask," he said, cutting a bite for Spike. He made an offering gesture to Doyle who just shook his head and sipped his coffee.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Much later that same day they sat around the office. Cordelia had gone home complaining that they had not one call all day. "Let's go clubbing," Xander said suddenly. "We might explode if we don't do something soon."
"Xander a word?" Spike asked. He nodded to Doyle as he dragged the boy into the adjacent room. "Being friendly, yes, that is good. Spending an amount of time that could be considered incestuous is not. I have no interest in being a trisexual."
"Would you want to be alone if I were in Sunnydale?"
Spike groaned but had the decency to look slightly repentant. "That's not fair, Xand."
"No you're right, it's not fair: that Angel had to go there. Stop being a child Spike; this is forever. How's one night going to change that? Anyway, I like him. He's nice. And you love clubbing."
"Yeah," he said shaking his head as if to dislodge thoughts. "You're right. Where are we going?"
"It's a place I like."
Shaking his head he said, with a laugh, "Commo, then." They walked out into the foyer. "So after much debate we're going to a place Xander likes."
"Why don't you guys just go? I'm kinda tired."
"No," said Spike, "We won't take no for an answer. Go get your kit on and let's go." He gave Xander's black baggy jeans and gray t-shirt a look. Yep, he was fine to go clubbing. Spike wanted to redress the boy, strip his wardrobe bare and start anew successfully ridding the boy of all things Sunnydale. He was planning on doing this slowly so Xander would not balk at the sudden change. He ran his fingers down his lover's arm. His mind was in turmoil and maybe some clubbing would do him good.
"Doyle," Xander called after the dark haired man who had just gone down in the elevator. "Bring ID. They're kinda strict about drinking age . . . I'm gonna be sporting a minor stamp on my hand."
"Wow, that's gonna be such a turn on," Spike said, "What about me? I have no ID."
"You tell them you lost your wallet in Sunnydale. They'll be very understanding."
"Demon joint?"
"No but everyone one is welcome there. I think there's an antiviolence spell or something because there is never any trouble. You'll like it."
"Sounds like I might, yeah." He kissed Xander on the nose. "How's my husband?"
"God, I love you," he said looking into Spike's eyes. "You have no idea how much."
"Nope, probably don't. But you can prove it to me later." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dark, cool, and loud the club was almost a larger version of the Bronze. Doyle and Xander were on a couch that was positioned under the stairs leading up to the second floor. They nursed their coffees. Spike stood behind them at the bar chatting up some girls.
"That doesn't bother you?" Doyle asked.
"No. Should it?"
"I guess I'm just the jealous type. That wou' kill me."
"No, I mean at the end of the night he's gonna be laying with me. And if you ever watch him he never once touches one of them. It's all words. And all the words are bullshit."
As if to prove the point Spike's voice floated over the lull in the music. "So I said to him I'm a lawyer not a doctor!" The statement was accompanied with the girls' laughter.
Xander made a gesture as if to say: see. "Did you ever read Armistead Maupin?" Doyle shook his head. "Amazing writer. Best books ever. He says two things that I think rule my life. That you'll be fine without a lover if you have five good friends, which I actually think with or without someone everything in life is better if you have five good friends. And secondly that you can have a hot lover, a hot apartment, or a hot job but never all three at once. And I'm just waiting for the apartment building to burn down because Spike isn't going anywhere and it's not as though AI could get anymore broke."
"I hope I'm one of these five good friends," Doyle said with a laugh.
"Oh God," Xander said.
"What?"
"This is just like the book." He looked up. "I think you might be three of them." Doyle laughed loudly. "Look can I ask you a question?" Doyle nodded. "You're a demon right?"
"Did Spike tell you that?!" Doyle asked sounding shocked.
"No I just assumed. Look sorry. Just forget it."
"No, honestly, it's ok. What was the questioned?"
"How long will you live? I was just wondering if it was only vamps that live forever."
"I won't live forever, but I don't know. I could live anywhere from five to eight hundred years. I won't age much over forty. It should be twenty but I'm human on my mother's side."
A beautiful girl walked over and sat down next to Xander. "Hi," she said. "I hope this doesn't seem to forward, I'm Jane by the way, but would you like to buy me a drink?"
"Hi, Jane. I'm Xander. And I got married just last night. I'd love to buy you a drink but your time might be better spent on someone else."
"Why are the hot one's always married?" she asked Doyle who shrugged. "Well it was worth a try," She said as she got up, and walked away.
"You just got cruised by possibly the best looking woman in the place and you just sent her away with a flea in her ear."
"Well," Xander said jokingly. "Unlike Spike. I have no intention of talking to anyone who I'm not trying to bag."
"Well what about me?" Doyle laughed.
"Who's to say I'm not trying to seduce you but you keep bringing Spike up?" They both laughed.
"You always get the good looking people."
"That's not true and hey, look at Angel. He's not half bad."
"Oh please, 'it's not true', have you ever dated someone even normal lookin'?"
"Well, Cordy, Anya, Willow, Jesse, Faith." He counted on his thumb. Then he smiled. "Nope, all lookers, Willow in a cute sorta way, but pretty nonetheless."
"Anya? Not Anyanka?" Xander just nodded. "And Jesse? The guy ye lived above the diner with?"
"I took Anya to Prom. And yeah, the same Jesse." He smiled at the memory. "That was my first serious relationship. Damn that sounded juvenile."
"Ye're nineteen, ye are juvenile."
"Hey! I'm married!"
"Oh please! A) I'm divorced and B) yer married to Spike who is the most immature hundred plus vamp out there!" They both laughed. "So what happened to this Jesse?" he asked having heard the Willow tale of woe from Cordy already. "Do ye ever see him anymore?"
Xander laughed. "No. Um. He's dead."
"Oh God, I'm sorry. How did he.? I mean if ye don't mind me askin'?"
"I rammed a piece of wood through his heart." Xander laughed he wasn't sure what he thought was funny.
It was slowly dawning on why everyone thought the boy was stronger than most, he was. "So Spike wasn't the first vampire ye-"
Xander cut him off. "Jesse wasn't a vampire until the last day of his life. He was the first vampire I ever staked. Buffy told me that he wasn't Jesse and I believed her. He's what made me hate Angel."
"Angel, did he?"
"No, Angel didn't turn him. Darla, Angel's sire, turned Jesse. I don't even know if Angel ever saw Jesse. I just hated him because he got to live, Buffy got to keep *her* vampire. It took me years to realize that it wasn't Angel's fault that Buffy didn't kill him. The only one responsible for Buffy's hypocrisy was Buffy. God and now I'm feeling guilty for all that shit I laid on him the other day."
"He knew you didn't mean it. That you were angry and that if you couldn't stake Angelus why not yell at the man who wears his face. He forgave you before you asked for it. What's goin' on with ye and the slayer?"
"Nothing. Nor will anything happen with her ever again."
"Don't ye tink that's a bit rash?"
"No, it's been coming a long time. God, I'm depressing the whole scene. Wanta come dance with me?"
"You're not depressing the whole scene. Commo then," he said standing. "And where the hot girl failed, I have succeeded," he said with a smile as they walked to the dance floor. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"'Ello," Spike said to the girls. "Would you do me a favor?" The pair nodded slowly. "You see the really cute brunette over there?" They nodded again. "Would one of you kindly go chat him up?"
One girl looked confused. "What's the deal? Is he some type of murderer? Why are you scouting for him?"
"He'd kill me if he knew I was doing this, actually. Oh wait the music's getting soft. He's gonna hear me. I'm going to say something odd. Just laugh ok?" They nodded bemused by the blond. "So I said to him I'm a lawyer not a doctor!" They laughed he continued, "It's just you see, he has really low self-esteem and he doesn't think anyone would want him."
Both girls gasped at the poor kicked puppy dog aspect of the situation. "But he's a hottie."
"I'll thank you for not saying that," Spike said. "So one of you'll do it?"
"I'm there," said the brunette.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Spike wandered towards them a little while later. "I'm bored. I've run out of money and personalities. Can we go home? Triple M, why don't you stay with us tonight? It's late and then we can all go to work tomorrow."
"No. that's kind of ye, but I want to go home to me own bed. Or rather Angel's own bed. I should really stop paying the rent on the apartment. Anyway I'm off. I'll see you crazy kids in the morning. Had a fun time tonight."
Writer: Azure K Mello
Disclaimer- I don't own the shoes I'm currently dancing in what's the likelihood I own anything in Joss' universe? I own the original novels. . . I bought them in Borders, and I own the DVDs. I don't however make money off of this I just seem to spend a lot on it. I in no way intend to infringe copyrights. I'm just entertaining myself, honestly, I'm shocked that anyone's read it.
Setting: somewhere during I Will Remember You, some conversation is mangled out of said ep. And in Buff's time line it's at the thanksgiving ep.
Note: Bannoffee is not a flavor in America much to my brother's chagrin bannoffee is banana toffee flavor. I don't like banana but for some reason bannoffee rocks my world.
Warning: SLASH Angel/Doyle. Spike/Xander. Don't like, don't read, don't flame. Also rather heavy mentions of abuse.
Thanks to Poison for being the fastest Beta I've ever had!
Section rating: R
Part 10/?
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"Yours?" Xander asked with a smile. "Don't be silly I already was."
"Well now that's obvious to everyone. All it is at this point though is a pledge. This doesn't have to happen if you don't want it to."
"What do I have to do to make it happen?" Spike said nothing but vamped. He looked away from Xander shamed by his inhumanity. The boy took his face in his hands and kissed him thoroughly. He examined all the planes of Spike face with his lips and tongue. His lips left slight hints of blood on the vampire's face. As Spike pulled back slightly he bit into the base of his thumb with razor like teeth.
He held out the digit to Xander. "All you need to do is drink. Realize now that this is forever. We don't need to do this if you feel in any way uncomfortable."
"I was yours before we even met," Xander said as he eyed Spike thumb. "This isn't going to turn me is it?"
"God, no. Don't you think I'd warn you if it did that? Like, 'oh, hey Xanpet, just a little note.' This won't change you in anyway. I wouldn't let that happen."
"You mean you wouldn't want?"
"Fuck, no! I want you, pet. You are my custom made perfect mate. Any other you just wouldn't be the same. And if you got really badly attacked and there was no time to get you to the hospital, then yeah maybe I would turn you because I couldn't bear to have you die in my arms. But I love you all heat filled and innocent."
"I'm not innocent!" Xander said. Spike just smiled as he held his thumb out. Xander rolled his eyes but sucked hard on the digit. The taste was pure magic: heat and power, love and anger, pain and grievance all mixed together with a touch of metal and salt. He pulled away when Spike tugged a little.
"Anyone who sees you will know. And if they see me they'll be envious as hell cause I've got your name all over me and they'll know there is no point in trying to seduce you."
"Anyone?"
"Well not the normal pedestrians but anyone the least bit other worldly will. Witches, demons, watchers; everyone in the know."
"Would Cordy? Would the Scoobies be 'in the know'?"
"Cor would probably just feel slightly weird around you. She'd know there was something different about you, but she'll most likely decide you got new shoes." He saw the look in Xander's eyes. "A slayer would know, but I don't know if *Buffy* would she's clueless and she never received the handbook." He smiled gently.
"It wouldn't matter if she could," Xander said as he slid back into bed. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"So wait. Let me get this right," Doyle said slowly. "I had a vision 'bout Buffy and now you're gonna go save 'er? Can't you jus' give 'er a ring and tell her to watch 'erself?"
"Because we don't just call people when you have a vision. The Powers want me there. If it makes you feel any better I won't see her at all. Though it doesn't matter as the only person I want is right here."
"I know, it's just . . . she's really pretty, Angel. I saw 'er in the vision."
"You're right she's very pretty, but I love you and nothing can change that or threaten that."
"I know. I'm just scared for you. The vision wasn't fun. Indian ghosts, only hurt by their own weapons."
"I'll be home by tomorrow night," Angel said, his hands running down Doyle's arms. "If Xander and Spike come in, I know they don't really need to be here, but they've had two days off and they must be going stir crazy. Maybe you can find them something to do." Angel kissed the boy softly as he picked up his bag. "Home soon, promise." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The alarm went off and Xander tried to kill it. As he thrashed it into silence he rolled over to Spike and winced, sore from the night before. He smiled at the memory of feeling loved and completed and safe in the arms and body of another person. Sighing he kissed Spike's neck. "We should go in to work."
"Do we have to? Can't we forgo it as a post coital act?"
"We could but as we haven't really gone to work since we got back from Sunnydale three days ago we should make an appearance."
"Good point," Spike said, making no move to get up. He ran his fingers over Xander's stomach and felt the strained muscles that he knew weren't there purely from sexual exertion. "What's wrong, baby?"
"Weird dreams. Are we married now? I died in the dream and you were the only person to know and Buffy came and she couldn't remember me and you got so angry and you screamed, 'My mate and husband is dead and you don't remember his face?!?' and it was odd. No one remembered me. More unsettling than scary."
"Hey people would be upset if you died!"
"Yeah you." He said it seriously with no malice or anger in his voice, the lack thereof upset Spike more than it's presence would have.
"The Sunnydale crew would care. Not as much as they should, but that's their lose. And yes, I would mourn you - in fact, I wouldn't be there because I'd have staked myself. I would grace your body with my ashes and feel as the last of your heat ebbed away. And even though you don't realize it, all of Angel Investigations would mourn you. They like you, Xander. They would like you even more if you let them know you. I know it's hard not to guard yourself from others, but they're not the folks from the dale. Cordelia likes you. She sees you the way no one back there ever did. Maybe because you guys dated or whatever, maybe just because she wasn't so busy worshiping the goddess that is Buffy like the rest were, I don't know, but she does. And Doyle, while I make fun of him, is a nice boy. He wants to be your friend; I think he's another guarded individual. Doyle isn't that much older than you, he's still a boy and maybe there's a dark past but, honestly, who in our little group is completely unscathed? And hell, we must need some friends. I mean, Christ, I know he loves the man but can you imagine how hard it is to live with broody? And finally Angel, the patriarch of our little group likes pretty much everyone, he likes you, Xan, he always has. He thinks you've got spunk, my word not his. But yes, I guess we sort of are married; as much as a vampire can be. But it's more permanent than marriage. Are you freaked?"
"No, kinda, but not in the way you think. Does it scare me that I'm 19 and married? Not in the least. Am I freaked because it's you? Fuck, no. It's just, what happens when I die? How permanent are we talking?"
"Well it all depends. If it is allowed to, the connection between us won't let you die until I do. You won't age beyond thirty-ish but you'll still be human. Um. but if you don't want that or it scares you it won't happen. You'll age and die just as any other human would. It's not an issue really. You don't have to decide or anything, subconsciously your body will decide what you really want and act thusly."
Swallowing hard Xander wandered what the next three hundred years or so would bring, he had every intention of seeing them. More over he never want Spike's ashes to "grace his corpse feeling his heat ebb away" he couldn't bear to do that to this man. He would not leave him alone. "I do hope you realize you've just won yourself a Xander Harris in the ring throw game that is eternity." Spike beamed. Xander hated that smile because it was just proof that Spike didn't expect him, Xander, to be willing to spend that long with him. Standing he peeped out of the curtain and whistled, he threw the blinds back and there the window framed a gloomy LA day, there was no sun and very little light. "This is good. I wanted us to walk to work because I wanted to stop at a pawn shop."
"You want to pawn something? Is to get money to start our life together with?" Spike asked in a false shrill voice.
"No I want to buy something. What's your ring size?"
Spike opened his mouth, his jaw hanging open. "You're buying wedding bands from a pawn shop? That's so . . . me. We can get them somewhere real if you want them."
"No, listen up, Mr. Poet, I just . . . Well every dream I ever had got stolen until I came out here. So why can't the perfect symbol of my changed luck be stolen? I think there is some poetic justice, or injustice depending on the angle at which you stand."
"I think it sounds fucking brilliant. But we should ask the guy to only show us stuff he's had for over a year. 'Cause what if some poor young girl pawned it to pay for her husband's heart transplant and then couldn't get the money to get it out of hock? But if it's been there a year, she's left hubby and aint comin' back for the ring."
"I want one that has something inscribed in it. The more personal and cryptic the better."
"That's a little sick, Xan. And I'm the mass murderer." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The devious duo walked in at about eight. Angel had been gone for and hour and Cordy wouldn't be in for another. At the desk he sat playing with Angel's clock and brooding. He smiled as the guys came in, anything to get his mind off the Dark Avenger. Xander sat down next to him. Doyle looked at him looked at Spike and then back again. "Congrats," he said and went back to the clock after glancing at the ring on Xander's left hand. He watched as Spike nodded and walked stiffly to get coffee. "Long night?" he asked Xander with a leer.
The boy just smirked. "Where's Angel?" he asked amiably, keeping in mind what Spike had said about the boy's lack of friends.
"Sunnydale."
"That sucks, poor Angel! He'll be home as soon as possible, I assure you he won't stay a moment longer than is absolutely necessary. Been gone long?"
"Hour." Doyle said, slightly surprised at the boy's interest.
"And you've been alone? Oh, then it's time to go have some fun. Strip club or pancake joint? It's up to you. I know two very fine establishments."
"I'm over liquor."
"Wendy's House of Flap it is then."
"It's a dry strip joint?" asked a confused Doyle.
"Flap as in flapjacks. Wendy can do amazing things with a skillet. Grab a coat, it's kinda drizzly." Doyle stood there and looked at him open mouthed. "Doyle don't look at me like that, looking at me like that says you're thinking: wow, and normally he's such an asshole. Angel's out of town, there is nothing to kill, and I just got married all of these things lead to copious amounts of syrupy goodness."
"You just got *what*?" Cordelia asked from the door where she stood at the shockingly early time.
"Married, isn't that great?" Spike said, wrapping an arm around her waist. "Now he's wearing a ring that has 'forever in the darkness and always with you 1984' carved into it."
"Why?"
"We found it in a pawn store and liked it. It's very us don't you think?" Spike asked jovially.
"You angry, Cor?"
"Well I would have liked to have been in the know. I mean you didn't even have a service! I have shoes that would be great for a wedding."
Spike just laughed. "Wanta come get breaka with us?"
"No, I'll stay and do the phones. We might get a paying customer. Where are you going?"
"Wendy's House of Flap," Xander supplied.
"Oh! Would you bring me back some of her caramel walnut pancakes? Those are amazing." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The three sat in comfortable silence passing syrup and cutting bites. "See," Xander said finally, "wasn't this worth leaving the office for?" He cut into his chocolate, chocolate chip, chocolate sauce covered waffles.
"Hell, this is worth sending Angel to Sunnydale for. God if we could come here every time I had a vision, I would force 'em," Doyle said, eating bannoffee flavored hotcakes.
Spike's mouth was too full of coconut-honey French toast to comment clearly. "Ho ow fi we plac?"
"How'd I find this place?" Xander translated for Doyle who wasn't quite so used to the vampire's speech when distorted through fangs and food. Spike had vamped out at first bite and seemingly forgotten to change back. "Um, I ran away with Jess summer between eighth grade and high school, we planned and were prepared and we rented the upstairs room here. I don't know if it could be considered running away though as we went back a week before school and no one had noticed we were gone except Willow." He laughed, as did Doyle. Spike looked puzzled. "It's a human practice to laugh at awful childhoods in hindsight. Honestly, join us, Spike, it's fun. Anyway it was a great three months and I gained fourteen pounds living upstairs. This was always a favorite of mine," he said pointing at his plate.
Spike nuzzled his neck with his nose. "How can you enjoy that? Isn't it a chocolate over load to your palate?"
"The batter is milk, the chips are bittersweet, and the sauce is dark: it's a medially. And you know it, you're just wheedling for a bite without having to actually ask," he said, cutting a bite for Spike. He made an offering gesture to Doyle who just shook his head and sipped his coffee.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Much later that same day they sat around the office. Cordelia had gone home complaining that they had not one call all day. "Let's go clubbing," Xander said suddenly. "We might explode if we don't do something soon."
"Xander a word?" Spike asked. He nodded to Doyle as he dragged the boy into the adjacent room. "Being friendly, yes, that is good. Spending an amount of time that could be considered incestuous is not. I have no interest in being a trisexual."
"Would you want to be alone if I were in Sunnydale?"
Spike groaned but had the decency to look slightly repentant. "That's not fair, Xand."
"No you're right, it's not fair: that Angel had to go there. Stop being a child Spike; this is forever. How's one night going to change that? Anyway, I like him. He's nice. And you love clubbing."
"Yeah," he said shaking his head as if to dislodge thoughts. "You're right. Where are we going?"
"It's a place I like."
Shaking his head he said, with a laugh, "Commo, then." They walked out into the foyer. "So after much debate we're going to a place Xander likes."
"Why don't you guys just go? I'm kinda tired."
"No," said Spike, "We won't take no for an answer. Go get your kit on and let's go." He gave Xander's black baggy jeans and gray t-shirt a look. Yep, he was fine to go clubbing. Spike wanted to redress the boy, strip his wardrobe bare and start anew successfully ridding the boy of all things Sunnydale. He was planning on doing this slowly so Xander would not balk at the sudden change. He ran his fingers down his lover's arm. His mind was in turmoil and maybe some clubbing would do him good.
"Doyle," Xander called after the dark haired man who had just gone down in the elevator. "Bring ID. They're kinda strict about drinking age . . . I'm gonna be sporting a minor stamp on my hand."
"Wow, that's gonna be such a turn on," Spike said, "What about me? I have no ID."
"You tell them you lost your wallet in Sunnydale. They'll be very understanding."
"Demon joint?"
"No but everyone one is welcome there. I think there's an antiviolence spell or something because there is never any trouble. You'll like it."
"Sounds like I might, yeah." He kissed Xander on the nose. "How's my husband?"
"God, I love you," he said looking into Spike's eyes. "You have no idea how much."
"Nope, probably don't. But you can prove it to me later." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dark, cool, and loud the club was almost a larger version of the Bronze. Doyle and Xander were on a couch that was positioned under the stairs leading up to the second floor. They nursed their coffees. Spike stood behind them at the bar chatting up some girls.
"That doesn't bother you?" Doyle asked.
"No. Should it?"
"I guess I'm just the jealous type. That wou' kill me."
"No, I mean at the end of the night he's gonna be laying with me. And if you ever watch him he never once touches one of them. It's all words. And all the words are bullshit."
As if to prove the point Spike's voice floated over the lull in the music. "So I said to him I'm a lawyer not a doctor!" The statement was accompanied with the girls' laughter.
Xander made a gesture as if to say: see. "Did you ever read Armistead Maupin?" Doyle shook his head. "Amazing writer. Best books ever. He says two things that I think rule my life. That you'll be fine without a lover if you have five good friends, which I actually think with or without someone everything in life is better if you have five good friends. And secondly that you can have a hot lover, a hot apartment, or a hot job but never all three at once. And I'm just waiting for the apartment building to burn down because Spike isn't going anywhere and it's not as though AI could get anymore broke."
"I hope I'm one of these five good friends," Doyle said with a laugh.
"Oh God," Xander said.
"What?"
"This is just like the book." He looked up. "I think you might be three of them." Doyle laughed loudly. "Look can I ask you a question?" Doyle nodded. "You're a demon right?"
"Did Spike tell you that?!" Doyle asked sounding shocked.
"No I just assumed. Look sorry. Just forget it."
"No, honestly, it's ok. What was the questioned?"
"How long will you live? I was just wondering if it was only vamps that live forever."
"I won't live forever, but I don't know. I could live anywhere from five to eight hundred years. I won't age much over forty. It should be twenty but I'm human on my mother's side."
A beautiful girl walked over and sat down next to Xander. "Hi," she said. "I hope this doesn't seem to forward, I'm Jane by the way, but would you like to buy me a drink?"
"Hi, Jane. I'm Xander. And I got married just last night. I'd love to buy you a drink but your time might be better spent on someone else."
"Why are the hot one's always married?" she asked Doyle who shrugged. "Well it was worth a try," She said as she got up, and walked away.
"You just got cruised by possibly the best looking woman in the place and you just sent her away with a flea in her ear."
"Well," Xander said jokingly. "Unlike Spike. I have no intention of talking to anyone who I'm not trying to bag."
"Well what about me?" Doyle laughed.
"Who's to say I'm not trying to seduce you but you keep bringing Spike up?" They both laughed.
"You always get the good looking people."
"That's not true and hey, look at Angel. He's not half bad."
"Oh please, 'it's not true', have you ever dated someone even normal lookin'?"
"Well, Cordy, Anya, Willow, Jesse, Faith." He counted on his thumb. Then he smiled. "Nope, all lookers, Willow in a cute sorta way, but pretty nonetheless."
"Anya? Not Anyanka?" Xander just nodded. "And Jesse? The guy ye lived above the diner with?"
"I took Anya to Prom. And yeah, the same Jesse." He smiled at the memory. "That was my first serious relationship. Damn that sounded juvenile."
"Ye're nineteen, ye are juvenile."
"Hey! I'm married!"
"Oh please! A) I'm divorced and B) yer married to Spike who is the most immature hundred plus vamp out there!" They both laughed. "So what happened to this Jesse?" he asked having heard the Willow tale of woe from Cordy already. "Do ye ever see him anymore?"
Xander laughed. "No. Um. He's dead."
"Oh God, I'm sorry. How did he.? I mean if ye don't mind me askin'?"
"I rammed a piece of wood through his heart." Xander laughed he wasn't sure what he thought was funny.
It was slowly dawning on why everyone thought the boy was stronger than most, he was. "So Spike wasn't the first vampire ye-"
Xander cut him off. "Jesse wasn't a vampire until the last day of his life. He was the first vampire I ever staked. Buffy told me that he wasn't Jesse and I believed her. He's what made me hate Angel."
"Angel, did he?"
"No, Angel didn't turn him. Darla, Angel's sire, turned Jesse. I don't even know if Angel ever saw Jesse. I just hated him because he got to live, Buffy got to keep *her* vampire. It took me years to realize that it wasn't Angel's fault that Buffy didn't kill him. The only one responsible for Buffy's hypocrisy was Buffy. God and now I'm feeling guilty for all that shit I laid on him the other day."
"He knew you didn't mean it. That you were angry and that if you couldn't stake Angelus why not yell at the man who wears his face. He forgave you before you asked for it. What's goin' on with ye and the slayer?"
"Nothing. Nor will anything happen with her ever again."
"Don't ye tink that's a bit rash?"
"No, it's been coming a long time. God, I'm depressing the whole scene. Wanta come dance with me?"
"You're not depressing the whole scene. Commo then," he said standing. "And where the hot girl failed, I have succeeded," he said with a smile as they walked to the dance floor. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"'Ello," Spike said to the girls. "Would you do me a favor?" The pair nodded slowly. "You see the really cute brunette over there?" They nodded again. "Would one of you kindly go chat him up?"
One girl looked confused. "What's the deal? Is he some type of murderer? Why are you scouting for him?"
"He'd kill me if he knew I was doing this, actually. Oh wait the music's getting soft. He's gonna hear me. I'm going to say something odd. Just laugh ok?" They nodded bemused by the blond. "So I said to him I'm a lawyer not a doctor!" They laughed he continued, "It's just you see, he has really low self-esteem and he doesn't think anyone would want him."
Both girls gasped at the poor kicked puppy dog aspect of the situation. "But he's a hottie."
"I'll thank you for not saying that," Spike said. "So one of you'll do it?"
"I'm there," said the brunette.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Spike wandered towards them a little while later. "I'm bored. I've run out of money and personalities. Can we go home? Triple M, why don't you stay with us tonight? It's late and then we can all go to work tomorrow."
"No. that's kind of ye, but I want to go home to me own bed. Or rather Angel's own bed. I should really stop paying the rent on the apartment. Anyway I'm off. I'll see you crazy kids in the morning. Had a fun time tonight."