A/N: I knew where I wanted to go with this chapter, but every time I tried to type it out, it came out all wrong. So I don't like the end result, and I don't like this chapter, but it should get better. So hopefully enjoy. :)
Once Trish realized that she had to realize that Stephanie was really like Chris's sister in the eyes of his parents, the weekend became more relaxing for her. Granted, she still wasn't close to Chris's mother, but she didn't feel paralyzed by nervousness whenever she was around the older woman. She had come to observe that Loretta and Stephanie were very much alike, and it made sense for them to accept Stephanie as a daughter.
"Chris, Stephanie and I are going to go shopping, do you want to come with?" Trish asked as she walked into the living room where Chris was lounging on the couch watching television.
Chris groaned. "How did you talk Stephanie into going shopping? She's not a really huge fashionista or anything."
"I need new shoes," Stephanie said, poking her head into the room. "And unless you want me to walk around forever with shoes with holes in the bottom and then subsequently step on a rusty nail and get gangrene and then have to have my entire leg amputated, then you will understand my need for a trip to any place where there is a congregation of stores including a shoe store."
"I want you to get gangrene," Chris told her plainly.
"Ok then, but don't be surprised if it induces temporary insanity and I do something crazy like chop off all your hair and then shave it bald Snooks. Don't you think he'd look good bald Trish?" Stephanie asked.
Trish pretended to scrutinize Chris's horrified face. "I think it would do wonders actually."
"See Snooks, even your girlfriend is on my side."
"You two are going to end up chopping me into little bits down the road, I can envision it now. You're like two black widows waiting to pounce and I'm your innocent victim."
"Ooh, maybe I should buy an all black outfit if I'm going to be a black widow," Stephanie said. "Just get your ass dressed Snooks so we can go, I need new shoes and these kind of things don't wait."
"Hold your horses Stephers," Chris told her. "You can't just rush me."
"I can," Trish said, going and pulling Chris off the couch forcefully. He grunted as he fell forward a little, surprised by the strength she put behind her pulling on his arm.
"Finally, someone who can just take control over him!" Stephanie exclaimed. "Let us all praise the Lord almighty who has given the blonde strength to vanquish the evil dark lord!"
"One of these days Stephers, one of these days."
"To the moon Alice, to the moon," Stephanie said, trying to do her best Ralph Cramden impression.
"Oh say goodnight Gracie," Chris countered with a pop culture reference of his own.
"Goodnight Gracie," Stephanie said sweetly. Trish just shook her head, once these two got in one of their moods, it was hard to break them out of it. Sometimes she was glad that Stephanie was around so much because it meant that she didn't have to try and keep up with Chris. That was a task in and of itself.
Chris disappeared upstairs to get dressed. Trish and Stephanie stood next to each other waiting for him to come back down. They didn't say anything to each other and Stephanie understood that it was still a little bit awkward between the two of them. They were friends of course, at least Stephanie thought so, but there was this weird tension as well and Stephanie couldn't explain that at all.
"So…" Trish said, trying to break the silence. "Chris's parents are really nice."
"I know, right?" Stephanie agreed with a nod. "They're like the gold medalists of parents."
"Definitely," Trish said awkwardly.
Chris came bounding down the stairs, pulling on his shoes as he went down, almost tripping, but catching himself just in time. Stephanie let out a little giggle and Chris gave her a dirty look. Stephanie just batted her eyelashes at him as he came and wrapped his arm around Trish's waist. Before they knew it, they were in the car and on the way to the mall.
"You guys don't like act totally weird at malls right?" Trish asked as they were walking into the mall. "I mean, you act somewhat normal right?"
"Snooks, do we act normal?" Stephanie asked Chris. He slung his arm around her shoulders playfully.
"Do we ever act normal Stephers?" he said affectionately. "Nah, you don't have to worry about us Trish, it's not like we're going to run around like chickens with our heads cut off. Is that true? Do chickens run around with their heads cut off? I mean, what a disgusting visual that is. A chicken, no head, running around like it's not doing anything."
"Eww, that is gross," Stephanie said, making a face. "Now I may have my chicken-eating impeded by that gross visage."
"Visage? Uh-oh, here comes intellectual Stephers!"
"So Steph, did you maybe want to hit up Victoria's Secret and you could get something for Randy, and I could get a little something for Chris?" Trish said suggestively.
Stephanie guffawed. "Snooks, the reason?"
"Steph does not wear lingerie as she feels that one should not spend a gross amount of money for something that will: a. come off rather quickly b. be uncomfortable and c. make her look like a whore."
"Oh," Trish said. "I had no idea."
"I don't go around parading my thoughts on certain subjects unless the situation arises. It's like my feelings on Valentine's Day."
"Which she also hates," Chris said definitively.
"But don't let me stop you from going," Stephanie said. "As Sly and the Family stone once sang, 'different strokes for different folks,' so go right ahead."
"What will you guys be doing?" Trish asked.
"Well, I need to get shoes, and then we'll probably go the video store or something," Chris said. "We'll keep ourselves occupied, don't worry about us. We're big kids Trish, no need to act like our mother."
"I just don't want to get a call from mall security," Trish said, leaning up to kiss him. "I'd ask Steph to watch you, but I don't think I can trust her either."
"I'm insulted!" Stephanie said, feigning anger. She placed her hand over her heart. "And I thought that you liked me Trish. Now hearing this, I just don't know, I just can't understand how you would say something so callous."
"Both of you, no horsing around," she said, pointing at both of them. "We'll meet back up in a half hour for lunch right here."
"Yes ma'am," Chris saluted. "Come on Stephers, we've only got half an hour before the queen puts us back into the dungeon."
Trish shook her head and gave them one last, lingering look. Stephanie looped her arm through Chris's as they looked around the mall. Chris raised his eyebrows at Stephanie, and she shrugged, not knowing exactly what to do at the moment. Chris sighed and smiled at her carefully.
"We should talk."
"Are you breaking up with me!" she said, pretending to sob. "In the mall, you're breaking up with me at the mall!"
A few people were starting to look at the two of them. Chris just rolled his eyes and Stephanie leaned up to give him a kiss on the cheek. He knew that he was going to break from that and he led her over to a bench in the middle of the mall. Stephanie looked around, wondering why he had chosen this spot, not that he HAD to choose this spot for any particular reason, but now she was over-thinking this.
"Ok, so what's on your mind?"
"Well…Trish is a little bit jealous of you."
"Excuse me, the blonde bombshell is jealous of ME. I think I need this certified by a notary because I'm not going to believe it otherwise, it's just too bizarre."
"It's true Stephers, she's jealous of you."
"Snooks, you've got to be kidding me. That's just the stupidest idea ever, and we've had some stupid ideas, remember when we forgot to put the lid on the blender when we were making milkshakes, or when we thought that s'mores made over a fireplace would taste as good as the regular ones? Those are not even on par with the stupidity of the blonde bombshell being jealous of me."
"Well she is, and you're going to have to face that fact."
"Let's go get my shoes Snooks, I'm not going to discuss this stupid thing with you right now."
"Stephers, it's because of my parents."
Stephanie stopped her walking away and looked back at him. "Walk and talk Snooks, walk and talk."
He got up and followed her. "It's like this. She sees how you are around my parents, she sees how close you are and she wanted to come here and make a good impression on them. She wanted to get close to my mom and she feels like she can't because of you."
"What? So this is my fault. Uh-uh Snooks, I haven't acted any different than I usually act, so you can't go blaming this on me."
"I'm not blaming anything on you," Chris told her, sighing. "I told Trish that you're like a little sister to me, that my parents think of you as my little sister and nothing more. But I don't know what to do about it."
"There's nothing you can do…what do you want me to do Snooks? Do you want me to leave? Do you want me to stop talking to your parents? I don't know what I can do here."
"I'm not asking you to do anything Stephers, I'm just…I'm just telling you. No crime in that, it's not a felony last time I checked, although there are some silly laws in some states, like did you know in Denver, it's against the law to lend your vacuum cleaner to your neighbor?"
"Wow, remind me never to move to Denver," Stephanie said sarcastically. "And if you're telling me that means you have the implication to do something. So you're implying that I should do something about the situation and you have as of yet to inform me what that is."
"Nothing," he protested. "You know, I bet a poisonous snake is easier to get along with than you."
"Then why don't you go befriend one, I'm sure it's less of a biter than I am," she said, chomping her teeth for effect. They arrived at the shoe store and Stephanie went around looking for shoes as Chris watched. Stephanie was one of those people who did things as quickly as possible. She would see something, try it on quickly and if it fit and she liked it, she was out of there. She did not browse, she came with a mission and when that mission was finished, she left. He liked that about her. They were out of the store in ten minutes tops, and walking back to where they were going to meet Trish.
"I didn't know you were a biter, that might hinder any future romantic entanglements I get in with you."
"Snooks, you will never see any of this," Stephanie said, gesturing towards her body. "You compared me to a snake, and since I'm of a different species, there's no way that we can take our relationship any further. Too bad, so sad."
"What's so sad you guys?" Trish asked as she walked up to them.
"Nothing Trish," Stephanie said sweetly. "Got what you wanted?"
"Yup," she said, holding up a bag.
"Cool," Chris answered, staring at Stephanie. Stephanie glared at him and it was a big icy for a moment before they heard another voice.
"Chris Jericho, is that you?"
Chris turned and saw a familiar looking guy walking towards him. "Mike Adamson, man, how long has it been?"
"Too long," Mike said. "How've you been? Still wrestling?"
"You know it," Chris said, shaking his hand. "Oh, let me introduce you." He turned to Stephanie and Trish. "This is my girlfriend Trish, and this is my best friend Stephanie."
"Whoa, whoa, whoa, this is your girlfriend and your best friend?" Mike said, giving Stephanie a long once-over.
"Yeah," Chris shrugged, not knowing what the big deal was. But then Chris had never seen the big deal with having a girl best friend. Sure, they had had their differences at first, Stephanie telling him why it was so important that he kept the toilet seat down, but overall, it wasn't that different.
Mike pulled Chris away for a moment, "That's your best friend?"
"Yeah," Chris told him. "She's been my best friend for like four years."
"Wow, I think I should get into wrestling," Mike said. "So introduce me."
"Oh yeah," Chris said. "Girls, this is Mike, he and I went to college together, he actually kind of pushed me into journalism as my major."
"So do I have you to thank for making Chris the most verbose guy I know?" Stephanie said, shaking Mike's hand. "You didn't do a very good job though."
"Stephers, be nice."
"I am nice Snooks," Stephanie said sweetly.
"Snooks?" Mike asked.
"Don't worry about it."
"I won't," Mike said, brushing past Chris to get to Stephanie. "You look familiar, I feel like I should know you, but I don't think I do."
"Considering I've never met you, I don't think that you know me, unless we met in a previous life, not that I believe in previous lives, but at this point, I can't say that they have or have not existed. I wouldn't want to discount their existence only to die and then come back as a fish or something and then feel stupid for not believing."
"I do not think I've ever met someone like you."
"Then you haven't really gotten out much, I'm a female, which is different from a male, I could go into the how, but this is a public place."
"You're funny."
"I get that a lot, it always makes me wonder if I didn't miss my true calling as a clown," Stephanie pondered.
Chris watched as Mike was so obviously flirting with Stephanie. He didn't like the feeling of watching her flirt with an old friend. He didn't know why it bothered him, oh right, now he knew why it bothered him. Chris never trusted any guy that went after Stephanie. Yeah, he had done some really strange things to ensure her protection, following her on dates was just an example, but that's just who he was.
Stephanie was different from other girls though, she was probably one of the few that could truly take care of herself if the situation arose, and yet he constantly found himself wanting to just protect her, especially after the whole debacle with Hunter. He didn't trust guys around Stephanie, and if he had his way, she would never date another guy in her life, and he would just take care of her. Wait, HE would just take care of her? When did that thought enter his mind?
No, that had always been there, Chris knew, no matter what, he was going to take care of Stephanie. In what capacity though, he had yet to figure it out.
But he had time.