Ok people. You'll have to wait a coupla days for the next update as Jeeves is lazy and I am going fishing.

Disclaimer: Legally, unneeded. However will warn that you are now entering scarily obsessed fan-girl territory

101 Reasons House is the Sexiest Man on Television

101. "…and the Aussie will run like a scared wombat if things turn rough."

100. He's always right. Mistakes are made by other people.

99. He doesn't care if people know who saved their lives.

98. Those blue eyes….drool

97. He's worked with the mafia.

96. Therefore he drives a '65 Red Corvette…Yum.

95. He's too bitter to smile often.

94. When he does, bones melt.

93. Oh my god, those EYES.

92. That moment in the theme song where his face is looking straight at you from that brain? Yeah.

91. American actors faking a British accent: not sexy. British actors faking an American accent: very sexy.

90. Speaking of Laurie's British accent: sexy, sexy, SEXY

89. His voice in general, low, husky, and gorgeous.

88. That scruffy look.

87. For some reason…the Nike Shox

86. Those twin pools of ice water he calls eyes.

85. His endearingly childish obsession with video games

84. Ditto his iPod

83. Ditto his TV schedule

82. Did I mention his blue eyes?

81. Because he's the only man who can wear five layers of clothes and still hit your system as hard as a guy in boxers.

80. His obsession with keeping people alive

79. His obsession with avoiding said life.

78. He inspires major loyalty in the few friends he has.

77. The eyes.

76. The simple fact that Wilson was worried about Cameron hurting House and not vise versa.

75. Complete and utter confidence in his ability

74. Complete and utter lack of confidence in himself.

73. "Everybody lies."

72. "Paging Dr. Foreman….leave the room"

71. The fact that both 73. and 72. passed his lips with the same sarcastic look.

70. That look he gave the student in Three Lessons when he asked why Carmen Electra's pants were off.

69. The eyes he used to give above look.

68. Hugh Laurie made Regis Philbmin look like a complete moron when on Regis and Kelly.

67. But he bonded with Jay Leno and talked motorcycles.

66. Oh, speaking of motorcycles…he RIDES one.

65. The fact that Hugh Laurie, a well-known British comedian, can play such a jerk.

64. Back on House, he plays piano and listens to heavy metal.

63. He also listens to country, jazz, and pop. rock.

62. He hates the patients and loves the illness

61. But he saves the patients and kills the illness

60. The way he looks when he leans on the wipeboard.

59. Blue. Eyes.

58. That scene where he plays "Happy Birthday" on his piano…

57. "No I will NOT have sex with you…not again!"

56. When he took one look at the fake breasts and decided to call Wilson in for a "consult"

55. Ducklings

54. The cerulean visual organs.

53. "This guy is NOT the world's greatest dad, not even ranking. What kind of dad lets their kids play with lead based paint?"

52. As above, he ALWAYS has the last word.

51. When he stood up, looked at the judge, and told him to see a doctor about heart problems and managed to look caring for an instant.

50. AM I THE ONLY ONE OBSESSED WITH THOSE EYES?

49. The way he uses that cane to block people

48. Ditto knock things out of their hands

47. When he used the restraining order to get out of clinic duty.

46. That crazed look when he said "Maybe I'm just too STONED to tell."

45. The eyes that he widened in above crazed look.

44. He trusts no one.

43. Perversely, people are forced to trust HIM with their lives.

42. He always earns that trust.

41. He "avoids work like the plague…unless it actually IS the plague."

40. Two words: Brutally Honest.

39. Again, two words: Blue Eyes.

38. How he rests his head on the handle of his cane when stressed.

37. He's as obsessive about saving life as I am about him. Almost.

36. The fact that he looked totally disgusted with himself when he was forced to agree not to tell that girl's parents she was pregnant…"New Jersey says: You're the boss"

35. Bleu yeux

34. Chase and Foreman would probably be decent cat-burglars by now.

33. If they were ever caught in above activities, House would get a kick out of taking the stand as a character witness against them.

32. Or he would drive the getaway car.

31. The way Hugh Laurie enjoys describing House as "ornery"

30. He's ornery.

29. Ojos Azules

28. House MD may be less popular than Lost according to an online poll, (grr.) but Greg House is kicking Matthew Fox's (guy from Lost) butt! (mwahahaha)

27. He inspires fanfic writers to write things like, well, the "Piano Man" chapter in Happiness is Bliss for instance…

26. Illness is no longer a hardship, as I simply imagine House treating me.

25. Only the people who've never seen the show think that above makes me crazy.

24. His tortured soul twisting behind those bright blue eyes.

23. I would like an infarction in my leg. I want a cane.

22. He makes me go huff-puff. (Name the reference, and I will write a chapter based off of whatever you want. Seriously. –Jeeves)

21. He inspired me to buy flats b/c he rejected that one chick b/c of her heels….

20. He played Journey at high volumes.

19. When Vogler was trying to speak.

18. While air-drumming.

17. I guess you've figured out I'm obsessed with his eyes…

16. General distrust for authority. (Down with the Man!)

15. "Everyone lies…except politicians?"

14. I agree, pharmaceutical companies DO just want our money.

13. Five o'clock shadow.

12. He has no emotions unless they're expressed through ivory keys.

11.Those two things on his face? I can't remember what they're called…but they're blue...

10. "I have a friend who I have to pay ten dollars every time someone tells him thank you."

9. "You're dying."

8. He reminds me of Peter Warne. (If you can post a review showing me you know who this is…I will write a chapter for this based off whatever concept you pick. It can be ANYTHING and I will do it if you know who Peter Warne is.-Wooster)

7. He reminds me of Han Solo.

6. He reminds me of Henry Higgins.

5. That brilliant dream sequence where he tells Vogler he's dying and he bought an extra large coffin…

4. Those gorgeous blue eyes.

3. That incredibly phallic cane.

2. His incredibly sexy INTELLIGENCE

and the number one reason House is the sexiest man on television?

He got Cameron a corsage.

Ok, obsessive fans that's it for today. Next chapter will be worth the wait you'll have: The Process of Obsession….