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Cold
He shivers and pulls the torn, ragged robes in closer around him although he knows all too well that this won't help.
It's not the cold seeping in from the icy stones surrounding him that freezes him, nor does it come from the damp air.
There are other kinds of cold, deeper and far more deadly ones. He has long since learned that it doesn't have to be winter for one to freeze to death.
He closes his eyes and two tears drop out of them, glinting in the fading moonlight. He feels as if they are turning into crystals of ice, cutting his skin as they descend his cheeks.
No, it's not the cold from his cell that makes him shiver.
It's the cold from betrayal…
One of his best friends, once as close as a brother, has betrayed him. And not only him but everything he has ever believed in, everything that has ever been dear to him.
He is betrayed.
It's the cold from being guilty…
It is his fault that his closest friend is now dead, that his own godson is orphaned. Why didn't he listen to his instincts? Why did he make the choice he has made? Oh, why did he fall for the traitor's trap?
He is guilty.
It is the cold from being left alone…
Everyone he once knew, cared for, is either dead or has turned away from him. The last of his three friends, the one that is neither dead nor has turned traitor, has only hatred let for him. The eyes that turned to him now are filled with contempt, accusations, loathing.
He is alone.
It's the cold from fear…
Every day the dementors come closer to the cell door. How long until they enter, no longer content with watching, feeding from outside? How long until they crack him, steal the last bit of identity he has preserved for himself?
He is afraid.
Another violent shudder runs through the painfully thin frame and he wonders briefly if one could die from a frozen heart.
Through the mist the cold has laid around his mind he notices that the light changes as the sun slowly rises.
It doesn't matter, though.
He knows that its rays will bring no warmth to him.
There are so many different kinds of cold that cannot be warmed by blanket, fire or sun.
So many different kinds – and Sirius Black knows them all…
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