Axe: You've Been Warned
A/N: Rated T to be sure. Enjoy. Also consists of some drama
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Chapter 1:
"Really. How do you take all of this?"
"Simple, Ren. Just ignore the pain and wait for some more," Yoh laughed.
"I agree with Ren, dude. This is just horrible. Complete torture. I mean this stuff could actually kill you, you know."
"Nah, it's not that bad Horohoro."
"You get used to it once you've done it over 300 times," Yoh sighed.
Tick
"You got one more left, Yoh."
"Great." Yoh panted.
"So Yoh.. what's the deal with you and the Misses? She's been a little cranky lately."
"What do you mean, Horohoro?"
"I don't know. Maybe she's having her monthly 'lady problems'.."
Ren smacked his forehead.
"No, not that you idiot!"
"O-Oh..! Right." Horohoro sputtered.
"I mean, how are things going between you two."
"Oh. Well .. Fine I guess."
"Fine?"
"That doesn't sound good."
Ren nodded his head in agreement.
"What's wrong with that?" Yoh questioned as new sweat dripped from his face.
"Yoh. I'm trying to ask how is your relationship with Anna going."
"Ohh…."
"That doesn't sound good either," Ren exclaimed.
Horohoro nodded his head in agreement.
"Well I think it's just a matter of time, you guys."
All three looked over at their tiny friend, who took his head out of his red book that he constantly holds.
"A matter of time before what," Yoh wearily asked.
"Before your relationship will grow into something more serious."
Ren and Horohoro nodded their heads in agreement.
Tick
"You're done Yoh," Ren said.
Yoh collapsed next to the guys on the grass.
"So where do you guys…(pant) think that Anna and I….(pant) are at…(pant) right now?" Yoh asked.
"Right now, you have a relationship that can be easily broken at anytime now." Manta said.
"What? But how?" Yoh implored.
"Look Yoh. I'm not saying you guys are a bad couple. I'm just saying I don't think you guys are even a couple."
Ren and Horohoro reacted to this quickly.
"Oh yeah dude."
"Totally."
"He is so right man."
"For sure."
Yoh looked at them bewildered.
"What? You guys agree with Manta?"
Ren and Horohoro looked at each other.
"U-Uhhhhhh… n-no..!" They both said.
"No.. no you're right Yoh."
"You guys are a great couple."
"The best couple!"
"A match made in heaven."
Yoh rolled his eyes.
"Anyways, what were you saying before Manta?"
"Ahem. As I was saying … Yoh, you and Anna may look good together. But you guys are complete opposites!"
"Compare and contrast." Yoh demanded.
"Very well," Manta said.
"Yoh, you're friendly, kind-hearted, you put yourself before others, you're lazy, hard-working, and strong."
"That's one." Horohoro said.
"Anna is horrible. She's NOT friendly. She's NOT kind-hearted. She DOES NOT put herself before others. Well .. She is lazy, I guess. But she's NOT hard-working. And she's VERY strong for a girl.
"That's two, and very true." Ren pointed out.
"Yeah, nice comparing and contrasting little buddy." Horohoro praised Manta.
"Thanks. I've been working on it lately," Manta said coolly.
"Okay, so you guys just pointed out some strong evidence that shows how very different we are. What do you guys suppose I do?"
"Hmm.…" they all said, scratching their chins.
"I got nothing." Ren said and then looked over at Yoh.
"Me too."
Yoh looked over at Manta.
"Don't look at me! I've already done enough thinking for today.I already helped you compare and contrast. It's someone else's turn to think." Manta stated.
Manta looked over at Horohoro.
Ren and Yoh looked at Manta.
"It's someone else's turn to think."
They thought about what Manta said and looked away from Horohoro.
"Heey!" Horohoro whined.
"What?" They all said.
"You guys didn't want to see if I had anything to say!"
"And…?"
"And what if I do happen to come up with something brilliant!" Horohoro commented back.
"Hmm.. what if we try a nicer approach," Ren whispered to Manta.
"Go ahead and try it," Manta said.
"Okay." Ren said and walked up to Horohoro and bent down to speak.
"I'll try to say this in the nicest way possible," Ren said.
(Ahem)
"You-are-a-DUMB-ASS," Ren said slowly.
"Understand now?"
Ren smirked.
Horohoro narrowed his eyes and gritted his teeth.
"ARGHH! COME HERE YOU LITTLE PUNK!" Horohoro screamed and Yoh and Manta held him back.
Ren got up and crossed his arms across his chest still smirking.
"WHAT IS GOING ON HERE!"
Yoh and Manta let go of Horohoro as his anger decreased and Ren uncrossed his arms.
They all looked in the direction of where the voice was coming from.
There stood Anna, arms crossed, in front of the door looking furious. With her red bandana worn around her neck and her usual short black dress.
"Well?" Anna said irritated as she arched her right brow.
"W-Well .. We…. We were just messing around, you know. Boys." Yoh sweat dropped while scratching the back of his head.
"Hmph." Was all Anna said.
"Did you finish your training, yet?" Anna asked.
"Yes Anna."
"Good. Now go make dinner!" Anna ordered.
"Yes Anna."
And with that said, Anna went back into the house.
"Phew." They all said.
"Man is she scary!" Horohoro said.
"I almost peed my pants when I saw her just glaring at us. With those anger eyes."
"I know. I'm actually surprised she didn't add anything additional to your training," Manta said.
"Well I guess we should be heading off now before we get our heads chopped off," Ren exaggerated.
"Ren's right. Let's go you guys," Manta agreed as they all started walking towards the door.
"WAIT!"
All three turned around to see Horohoro still standing there.
"What is it?" Yoh asked.
"You guys still haven't heard my idea." Horohoro said.
They all groaned in union.
"Oh c'mon Horohoro. Give it a rest. You don't have ideas. You're… Horohoro!" Ren exclaimed.
Horohoro looked at Ren irritated.
"Okay you know what, mister? I'm tired of your crap. So I'm just going to pretend that I didn't hear that," Horohoro stated.
Ren just held up his hands in defense.
"Okay, we'll give it a try. What is it Horohoro? Hurry up, I've gotta make dinner for a witch." Yoh said.
"Well okay. Listen to this. One way to establish a good relationship with Anna is to hang out with her. Make her feel special, compliment her, get her small gifts. When you guys are somewhat closer than before, kiss her."
"And ruin our relationship?" Yoh yelled.
"What? No! A kiss is a good idea, right guys," Horohoro said looking at Ren and Manta hopefully.
"You know what? I think our little friend has a good point here," Ren agreed.
"You're right Ren!" Manta said.
"WHAT? You guys actually agree with Horohoro?" Yohscreeched.
"You guys have got to be kidding me." Yoh said.
"I can't kiss her. I just can't!" Yoh screamed.
"Just try it out Yoh." Horohoro said.
"Even if I wanted to, how can I make Anna kiss me?"
"And this is where Horohoro's great thinking, comes to an end." Ren said sarcastically.
"And that is where you are wrong, my dear friend." Horohoro said with as much sarcasm, mocking Ren.
"What are you suggesting," Manta asked.
Horohoro pulled out a small black bottle from his pocket.
"What is that?" Yoh said.
"It's called Axe. It's some kind of chick-magnet, dude. Spray some on and you got a herd of women all over you." Horohoro said proudly.
"And you want me to use it on Anna?" Yoh asked.
"YOH ASAKURA! WHERE IS MY DINNER?" Anna yelled from inside the house.
"Eeep." They all said.
"Sorry Yoh. We gotta go," Ren said.
"B-but ..!" Yoh protested.
"Just try it out, okay?" Horohoro said and then winked as they all left.
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A/N: Wow 6 pages of words. This is longest thing I've ever typed! I'm so proud of myself. Hehe, just kidding. Well I hope you like this fic. I will continue as soon as I can! Read and review, thanks :)