Chapter IV: A Night at Hotel Lezareno

A woman laid in a hammock on the beach, reading with a relaxed look on her face. She looked up into the sky and inhaled deeply, "Nothing like a nice night on the beach to calm your nerves." She adjusted her position in the hammock, but noticed something out of the corner of her eye. "What the heck is that?" she said out loud, dropping her book and attracting the attention of several people.

"Rejection!"

"Thunder Blade!"

"My beautiful face! My beautiful hair!"

"Retribution!"

"I'm immune to paralysis!"

"D'oh!"

"Not me…"

The woman looked at the crowd that had assembled around her. A man caught her attention, and she asked him, "Do you hear that yelling?"

"Yeah, I sure do," he replied. He rubbed his chin and squinted his eyes, taking a good look at the dust cloud that was headed toward them. "Is it just me, or is that thing getting closer?"

"I'm pretty sure it is."

"I'm starting to get the feeling that we should all run away right now."

"Me too," the woman said while grabbing the book that was now lying on the ground and untying her hammock at a rapid pace. When she was done, she began to run as fast as she could, the man not far behind her. The general populace watched as the two went, and then noticed just how close the dust cloud now was. A lightning bolt struck one men standing there, and he fell on the ground almost immediately.

"Maria!" the man shouted.

A woman ran to his side, and kneeled beside him. "I'll never leave you, Tony!"

"No Maria," Tony said, "You must escape from here before you too are stricken down."

"Oh, okay then," Maria said, standing up and beginning to run off. Before she could make it five feet away, she was hit by a ray of light, and she fell over. "Well, now I really can't leave you, Tony."

Panic consumed the beach as the beach-goers ran toward the exit. Shouts and screams of shear, unadulterated terror were heard from all around. Throughout all of this, though, Tony had broken out into song, "Mariaaaa, I'm dying with a girl named Mariaaaa! And suddenly that name-" The poor lad was promptly trampled by the fear consumed crowd as Maria silently wept for her love.

"Indignation!"

"Absolute!"

"Could ya at least let me outta this!"

"Thunder Explosion!"

"Judgement!"

"Ack!"

The three angels had finally made their way to the beach, and landed in an exhausted heap on the gritty sand. A small yelp and something akin to "Tony…" was heard from a female form under their bodies. Ignoring this, Yuan and Mithos immediately rose to their feet and faced each other, determination crossing both of their faces. Zelos soon got up as well, just in time to stop the ensuing battle that would likely be the end of Altamira.

"Guys! Guys!" the red-haired chosen yelled, stopping the two from running each other through, "Hotel Lezareno is only, what, one hundred feet away and I need my beauty sleep, beat each other up later."

The two Seraphim relaxed: Yuan placing his swallow on his back, and Mithos letting the glow dissipate from his hands. "I'm sorry," Yuan said while dusting himself off, "I became as childish as Mithos for a moment." Mithos only blew a raspberry in Yuan's general direction before setting off for the hotel.

When the three entered the Hotel Lezareno, they were greeted by a woman dressed in a black, and incredibly revealing, bunny suit. Zelos began to drool, quite audibly in fact, until Mithos slapped him across the face and shook his head in disgust. "Welcome to the Hotel Lezareno!" the woman shouted enthusiastically, "Do you have reservations?"

Yuan took the card Presea had handed him out of his pocket and handed it to the receptionist. She read it over before taking three keys from behind the desk and handing them to each of the members of Cruxis. "Your rooms are 200A, 201A, and 202A! All of them are on the third floor! The elevators are on the right wall! Enjoy your stay!" she yelled happily.

The angels began to walk towards the elevators. "I wonder why she's so cheerful." Mithos said.

"Probably to hide the shame of having to wear such an outfit," Yuan replied. He suddenly stopped walking and looked directly at Mithos, "Where's Zelos?"

The two Seraphim smacked their heads and turned around to look at the reception desk. There was Zelos, flirting with the receptionist. "So, hunnie, what's your name?"

"Lily," the woman giggled, blushing profusely.

"How about you come up to my room and-"

"Zelos!" Yuan yelled.

"What! I'm busy here!"

"Leave that woman alone and go to your room!"

"But-"

"Now!"

"Shoot!" he shouted, hanging his head down. He then turned back to Lily, "Don't worry, darlin', I'll be back." The Chosen then made his way to the elevator where his fellow angels waited for him. The three of them entered, Mithos pressed the button labeled three, feeling some sort of achievement in doing so, and the elevator rose to the third floor. They walked out of the elevator and stopped at the rooms directly across the hall.

"Well, this is convenient, our rooms are right here," Yuan said. He turned to look at his companions, and asked, "We should probably return to the Lezareno Company at about nine o'clock, so when are we going to meet?"

"In the morning of course," Mithos stated.

"I was hoping for something more specific."

"Twelve, then."

"I just said we should be there by nine, Mithos," Yuan said, massaging his temples.

"Oh, elev-"

"Let's just meet at eight, I'm going to bed," Zelos said, walking into room 201A and shutting the door behind him.

"Eight it is, then," Yuan concurred, entering room 202A and closing his door.

Mithos simply fumed where he stood, "Hey! Hey! I'm the leader! I should be making these decisions!" When his complaints fell on deaf ears, he walked into room 200A and slammed his door.

Yuan slept peacefully, dreaming of his beloved, but long dead, Martel. Inside his imagination, he was in a forest, filled with fruit-bearing trees and lush vegetation as far as the eye could see. Next to him sat a woman who wore a green jacket with loose fitting sleeves and white pants. Her teal hair reached the ground, and it seemed that it would reach her waist had she been standing. In it were two things that looked very similar to leaves. She wore a tranquil look on her face, but it soon turned sour. "Yuan," she began, "Why isn't the rest of the world like this place? Why must we continue to fight for the half-elves like us to have rights?"

"I don't know, Martel," Yuan replied, a look of gloom crossing his face. The gloom was only momentary, but he soon became much more optimistic, "But we'll find a way to bring equality to the world, I just know it."

"Oh Yuan, you always know how to make me feel better," Martel said, their faces drawing closer and closer together. Time seemed to slow down, and the world was silent. Normally, this would be very romantic, except for one thing.

"Haha!" Mithos laughed while throwing a water balloon at Yuan, "Gotcha!"

The poor half-elf was soaked. He immediately stood up and faced the short, blond-haired assailant. He slowly approached him, arms raised in the air menacingly. "You little twit, I oughtta-"

"Hahahahaha," Martel giggled. Yuan turned to look back at his betrothed, who was trying to hide the obvious pleasure she took from these sudden turn of events.

"Oh come on, it's not that funny."

"Yes it is!"

"You have no right to speak, you little yellow-haired dweeb!"

"Oh yeah, wanna fight!" Mithos inquired, raising his fists and taking a defensive stance.

"I won't stoop so low as to fight a young boy," Yuan replied, folding his arms and turning away.

"Pfeh!" Mithos shouted as he lunged at Yuan. The two began to fight, and Martel simply continued to laugh, knowing they'd do no real harm to each other.

A figure dressed in purple made his way out of the bushes, pulling the struggling half-elves apart. "Mithos, return to your training. You have much to learn if you wish to save Sylvarant and Tethe'Alla."

"Oh alright, Kratos," Mithos replied. He added, in a muffled voice, "Killjoy…"

"Did you say something Mithos?"

"No," he said. The two of them began to walk away as Yuan sat down next to Martel. They slowly began to embrace once more, savoring the moment. But they interrupted once again, this time by a large, yellow figure moving so fast that they could only see a blur.

"Wakka wakka wakka!" the figure shouted as it sped by Yuan. "Wakka wakka wakka!" it screamed again as it kept going.

Yuan only watched it go before saying, "That was strange, wasn't-" He stopped abruptly as he noticed that nothing was in his arms. He waved them frantically, trying to get a feel of something anything at all. He then turned around and faced the horrible truth, Martel was no longer with him, all that remained of her was one of the leaves from her hair. "Martel! Martel! MARTEL! MARTEEEEEELLLLLL!" he anguished.

Yuan woke up in a cold sweat, yelling, "MARTEEEEEELLLLLL!" He then looked around himself, noticing that he was in a hotel room. He took a cup and got some water from the faucet. He then proceeded to down it in one gulp. He paced back and forth before he finally sat down on his bed. "It was just a nightmare… I should go back to sleep…"

Meanwhile, in the Chosen's room, Zelos was having a much different dream. "Who wants to make sweet, sweet, passionate love with the Great Zelos tonight!" he propositioned to a large group of very attractive woman. They all raised their hands enthusiastically and hopped up and down. 'It's great having an entourage!' the Chosen thought. He rubbed his chin for a moment, and then yelled, "Ah, what the heck, you can all come!" There was an overjoyed shriek from the woman as they all rushed Zelos. "Wait! Wait! We can't do it here like a bunch of hobos, just wait till we get to my mansion, then we can get down!" Once again, there was a shriek from the woman as they all struggled to suppress their hormonal urges.

The group, of course led by the Great Zelos, made their way from Meltokio courtyard to the Chosen's Mansion. Once they reached the door, Zelos was greeted by an unpleasant surprise. "Seles, what are you doing out of the abby?"

A girl with short, pink hair barred the way to Zelos mansion, and what would be his ultimate achievement. She lifted her purse and smacked Zelos across the face with it before straightening her white, sleeveless dress. "Abby? Abby! That place is a horrible, horrible cage! I can't believe you'd send me there!"

"Oh come on, little sister," Zelos began while massaging his damaged cheek, "You're very sick and they can take care of you, what am I supposed to do?"

Seles looked up at her older brother with a face drenched in repugnance. She then looked at his large entourage attractive females, and then back at him, her face now holding a malicious smirk.

"Don't do it, Seles," Zelos pleaded.

"This man," the girl began, straightening her wide-brimmed hat, "This man is a horrible, horrible person!"

"Please Seles, don't do this to your lovable big brother!" Zelos begged, now on his knees.

"Once he's done with all of you, he'll throw you in a cage, and watch you starve to death, taunting you with very appetizing food the whole time! He'll laugh at your misery, and likely rape your relatives!" Seles yelled.

"No! It's all a lie! I'd never do something like that!" the Chosen yelled.

"Yeah, like we'd believe you!" one of the woman spat venomously.

"Come on, girls, let's go!" another one said, leading the entire entourage away from the mansion.

Zelos leapt onto one of the girl's legs, pleading, "Don't go! Don't go! No, please, don't go! For the love of Martel, don't go!" The woman only shook her leg, forcing the Chosen to let go, and continued walking away. "No! No, I was so close! That would have been the best night of my life! No! No! Noooooooo!"

Zelos fell out of his bed, a muffled "Noooooooo!" coming from his voice. He sat up and hung his head in depression, "Why Seles! Why did you have to ruin that most marvelous of marvelous nights!"

Mithos sat upon the throne of his personal castle, Vinheim. He looked around him at the emotionless angel drones who were busy doing their work. "This is the life," he sighed. Soon, a blue-haired angel ran up to him, he was wounded very badly, perhaps only having mere minutes left to live. Mithos rolled his eyes before saying, "What is it, Yuan?"

"Dur, teh captives haff escaped, duh," Yuan said dumbly before collapsing.

"Thank you Yuan," Mithos said, getting out of his throne, "I'll be sure they give you a proper burial." He then proceeded to walk back and forth over Yuan's lifeless body several times before walking towards the door, "Or maybe I won't… Kratos!"

The brown-haired Seraph kneeled before Mithos, "What is it you desire, o Great Mithos who is better than me and has taught me everything I know?"

"Go get yourself killed in a pitiful display of heroics while attempting, but failing miserably, to capture the captives."

"Yes Lord Yggdrasil who totally owns my poor, pathetic, human soul," Kratos replied as he charged off to fight the captives.

Mithos laughed before following him, "This should be greatly amusing." The two traveled through the purple, ethereal, and regal corridors of Vinheim before they came upon the captives.

"Bunnies, by order of the all power Mithos Yggdrasil who shear awesomeness can kill me in but one hint of a thought, you are to return to your cell right now," Kratos said, striking a heroic pose.

The rabbits simply looked confused before they lunged upon the brown-haired Seraph, ripping him limb from limb with their sharp bunny incisors. "I have accomplished my goal, o great and mighty Eight-Wings of Kratos pwning…" Kratos said as he collapsed before the leader of Cruxis.

Mithos simply broke into raucous laughter, "That, haha, really was hilarious, hahaha!" The bunnies slowly advanced upon the leader of Cruxis, their teeth dripping with the blood of the fallen Seraphim. Suddenly, a golden aura surrounded the Seraph as he yelled, "You dare to challenge me!" The bunnies then exploded into their composite atoms. "Hahahahahahaha! Fools! Did you really think you had a chance against the incredibly cool Mithos Yggdrasil who can beat the hell out of Kratos and despises Yuan! Wahahahahahahahaha!"

Mithos abruptly woke up and got out of bed. He walked over to a mirror, struck a pose, and said, "Dude. I rock!" He then struck a few more poses before climbing into bed and joining his fellow angels in sleep as they awaited for the morning to come.

The moon shone down as two men arrived on the beach to find the lifeless bodies of Tony and Maria. They glowered at each other, before one with short black hair spoke, "This is all your fault, Riff!"

The blond-haired one narrowed his eyes even more, "Oh, stow it, Bernardo!"

Bernardo took out a switchblade from his pocket, and Riff did the same. They proceeded to fight, though it looked far more like dancing, while singing, "There's gonna be a fight, toniiiight!" over and over again.

Notes: Thank you for the reviews Brandy Mallory and RoyalFanatic. I know, no one would ever expect Lloyd to be evil, would they. And Kratos is indeed a double-agent, but he, just like Yuan, must suffer his companions. I'm glad you're enjoying it, and I hope everyone enjoys this chapter.