Interview 4: Goomba

The new location of the interviews is at the edge of the theme park in a building and is close to Lemmy's Land.

As Koopa and MP were finishing polishing MM, MM was looking over some work stuff.

MM: Okay then, if I get one review/comment it means 100$. Plus, now that I know that every hit equals 5$. So 'bout 62 hits times 5$ equals………………………………………………………………….

Toad: O my gosh! 310$ for Master's sake!!!

MM: Oh! Okay then, 310$ plus 100$ equals………

Toad: Oh for cr-

MM: I know! 410$! To bad we don't have that kind of money! We only have 310$ ! An' I used 200$ of it to buy our own interview building!

Everyone 'cept MM: Hooray!

MM: To bad it's at the edge of this theme park and beside Lemmy's Land.

Everyone in the building: BOOOO!!! They hate Mario! They also hate Bowser Jr.! The greatest koopaling ever!

MM: Well we wouldn't HAVE to buy a new building if the old one/MY HOME didn't BLOW UP!

All the minis- 'cept MDK, MW, and MY glare at Toad.

Koopa and MP finish polishing MM.

MP: Finished!

MM hands MP a key to a room in Hotel Micro-Goomba.

MM: Go into room 64 with this key at 8:00 p.m. tonight.

Koopa and Toad: EEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!

MM: Okay, staff meeting on the stage!

All of the staff gets onstage.

MM: The payday date will be at the beginning of every third interview. An example would be ev'ry the 3rd, 6th, 9th, 12th, etc. You will all get 50 coins each. That doesn't include you, Koopa. But in order to pay you guys I need 450 $ to pay you guys. Enough 'bout that, We need 1000$ toto have the minimum amount of audience members, 50. The tickets will sell for 50$. So in order to get some money I need you guys to pitch in some money.

ML: NO WAY!!!

MM: Fine! Besides that, every 5 interviews, we get 250$ for ev'ry review/comment we got from the beginning until then. Also, every 10 interviews, we get 15$ for every hit we got from the beginning until then.

Goomba: Hello? Is this the place to get interviewed?

Everyone looks at Goomba.

Everyone: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

MM: Hi! Yes it is! Have you read the 'Interview Cycle'?

Goomba: Yes. I don't mind. It's like Bowser's dictatorship.

MM: Yeah, well I don't care. Now sit down in the interviewer's- intersection's- intercourse's- interviewee's chair!

Toad: Hee! Hee! Hee! You said intercourse!

Koopa: Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!!!!!

Goomba: He did? He did! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!!!!!!!!

MM: Yeah, whatever……Hee hee! Intercourse!

Toad, Goomba, and Koopa: Stop it! Ha ha ha!

MM: Intercourse! Intercourse! Intercourse! Intercourse! Intercourse! Intercourse! Intercourse! Intercourse! Intercourse! Intercourse!

Toad, Goomba, and Koopa start… uhh, what's the word… Hyperventilating! Yeah, that's the word: hyperventilating.

MK and MT: In 5…. 4…. 3…. 2…

MM: Hello ma peeps! Today we interview Goomba!

Toad: (At least he remembered to say 'we'!)

MM: Okay now quest.1: Why are some goombas good, and some are bad?

Goomba: Well, all goombas started on the good side, or the Mushroom Kingdom. This is because we are just smart deformed fungus. Some of us went to the Koopa Clan because the Toads thought they were better than us.

MM thinking aloud: Racist species.

Toad: Hey! We don't think that! At least, not anymore!

Goomba: I know. That's why goombas are starting to get rebellious against Bowser. I'm considered lucky to be in this interview.

Toad: Hmm. Quest. 2: Why are some goombas Mushroomians, and some are Darklanians?

Goomba: Some of the Mushroomian goombas are the ones who took a stand for the goomba species and up to your USED-TO-BE racist species.

Toad while thinking of the story Toadsworth told him: What a grim, grim, year year that was. 1,000,000,000 toads and 500,000,000 goombas dead and off the population chart.

Goomba: I know. Anyway, the other ones are goombas sent to the MK to attack but bought a house and lived in secrecy.

MM: Quest.3: What do you think if the Koopa Clan's saying "Goombas. The underlings of the underlings."?

Goomba: That saying is the thing that made the toads become racist! Although the goombas didn't know this until the captain of the toad army, Toadsworth, told the goomba army after the bloody war.

Toad: So that's how old people know these war stories!

MM: Um, Toad? Tha- Ah, forget it.

Toad: Quest.4: ……….. I don't know what to ask. You ask something, MM!

MM: Thanks! Don't think this'll get you a raise on your salary!

Toad:(Damn! That cost me a question!)

MM: Quest.4: ………. I've got nothin'. Good thing we have a caller!

As if on the letter Q, one of the caller lights starts blinking. Toad opens his mouth to ask a question, but MM presses the light first.

Punio: Hi! It's me again!

MM: Hey! Our first second-time caller! What is up in the hood?

Punio: ….. What?

MM: Do you have a question?

Punio: Yeah, I do! My question is…why are good goombas so much stronger than bad goombas?

Goomba: You should've read Goombella's "RPG Guide: HP, Defense, and Offense". Anyway, because Bowser calls Goombas " The underlings of the underlings", the only foods we get are the dead bodies of Bowser's other minions. While the Mushroomian goombas get all the nutritious foods. That's why they have higher HP, Defense, and Offense. All in all, goombas would all be healthy if the past goombas didn't go to the Koopa Clan.

Punio: Wow!!! You just revived my wanting to learn Health!

Goomba and Koopa: NNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

MM: Punio, do you remember what I said last time you called?

Punio: I do. Bye!

Light stops blinking.

MM: Well, that's all the time we have for today. Next time (and by time I mean tomorrow) we interview Boo!

Koopa, Toad, & Goomba: BBBOOOOOO!!!!

MM:…… Hey! Did you guys notice that you guys are the only living organisms in this staff?

Koopa: You just noticed that?

MM: …… You guys already knew?

Toad: -Sigh- End trans-

MM: Hey, I get to say that!

MM shifts his eyes left & right.

MM: Phew. End transmission!