Disclaimer: I do not own One Tree Hill, any of the characters, storylines, or actors. I would love to keep Sophia for myself though. Lol. I also do not own the song Right Here by Staind which inspired this story title.

A/N: This is my first fiction so go easy on me, but I would like to know your honest opinion and tell me if I should keep writing. This of course will be a Brooke/Lucas story but if I go on will also include Nathan/Haley and maybe Jake/Peyton if I decide he comes back. Keep in mind I do love myself some Jake. First part is in Lucas's point of view. I hope to have each character's thoughts later on.

Thanks to: Dayz, Jen, Lizzy, Tvslave, lucasscottlover, and Brucas4everfor your reviews. It is very sad at the moment but will get better. And everyone else who read thanks. But review this time!

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Chapter One: Waiting

Flashback

I hadn't told Brooke I was going to visit Peyton at the hospital. She had been sitting at her bedside and tending to her every need since Peyton was shot. When she wasn't doing that, she was at my house not letting my mom and I out of her sight. Both Peyton and I finally had to tell her to go home and get some rest. She had the apartment all to herself because Haley was staying at the house with Nathan. No one had been able to get a hold of Deb yet and Haley didn't want Nathan to be alone. But everyone knew that was just an excuse to be together. Nathan and Haley needed each other, just like I needed Brooke. And she wasn't going to be any good for anyone if she didn't take some time out for herself.

After a lot of convincing, Brooke finally agreed to go home, but in her words, "Just a quick shower so I don't smell like ass and a bite to eat so I don't pass out. Then I promise I will be right back." This girl was too much. I really don't know what any of us would do without her. So I took this free time as my opportunity to see Peyton without Brooke around. I still hadn't told her about the kiss in the library. Partly because it hasn't been the right time with everything that has happened, partly because I don't want to upset her, and partly because I don't know if it even meant anything. I know what it meant to me, but I have to see if Peyton is in the same place. But now was not the right time to bring it up. I have to wait till my life makes sense again before I go and complicate things further. So I must push these thoughts aside and remember what is important right now. That is Keith and my family, not my love life.

As I walk off the elevator with some flowers in one hand, I try to act cool and like nothing happened between us. She didn't love me and I sure as hell didn't love her. We were good friends and that is all either of us wanted. I peak into her room and see her lying in the bed with the television on, but not really watching it. She was just staring out the window with a blank expression in her eyes.

"Knock, knock."

"Hey Luke. Come on in."

"How are you feeling?"

"Oh just swell. Like I was shot in the leg, but I'll survive."

I looked down and frowned slightly. That made me think about how Keith hadn't survived. What made death take Keith but not Peyton. Wow, did I really say that? That sounds horrible. I would never want anything to have happened to Peyton instead. I wouldn't have been able to live with myself. But is Keith dying any different? As if Peyton knew what was going on in my head, she stopped my thoughts.

"Lucas, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to..."

"No that's okay. I know what you meant", I returned with a soft smile.

"So how are you doing? Wow that is a stupid question."

"No, no. I'm okay I guess. It's hard to explain what's going on in my head right now. I still don't think it has sunk in. Just a lot of confusion and guilt."

"Guilt for what? It's not your fault Lucas. If anything you tried to help the guy, but he had far too many problems then anyone could have seen."

"It's not that. If it wasn't for me, Keith wouldn't have gone in. All he wanted to do was protect me and know I was safe. He loved me so much that he risked his life. Do you remember the last thing he said to me?"

Peyton shook her head no.

"He said that he loved me and I should go. I should have known right there not to leave. Or to drag Keith with me. Or do something, but I just walked away. I walked away from the only father I had ever known. The only man that made me feel worthwhile and was happy I existed. If only I knew I would never see him again, I wouldn't have abandoned him."

I looked up and saw that Peyton had tears in her eyes and a sad expression on her face.

"You did it to save me Luke. It's because of me."

"Peyton that's ridiculous. I'm not blaming you. Don't for a minute try to take my pain away by putting it on yourself. I know you far too well and that won't work." I gave her an apologetic look. "I'm sorry I am so mixed up right now."

"Trust me Luke; I know how you're feeling. It is really hard and despite what people say it never gets any easier. If anything it gets harder as you are constantly reminded. It's just something you have to take day by day and realize nothing you did caused this. And nothing you can do can erase it. When my mom died I was so young that I didn't even know what was happening. At first I thought she was just going to walk back in the door or be there cooking breakfast the next morning. I woke up and ran downstairs looking all over the house for her and screaming her name. But of course she wasn't there. That's when I realized she was never going to be there again and I blamed myself. If it wasn't for her coming to pick me up from school, she wouldn't have ran that stop light and she would still be alive. If she hadn't loved me so much, she would have let me walk home in the rain, and she would still be here."

This was all sounding so familiar to me right now. Everything Peyton had gone through, I was going through. I knew she had been the person to talk to. Maybe I am not hopeless and the only one this is happening to. I continued listening to what Peyton was saying.

"This is when I began to shut myself off and shut everyone else out. I thought no one would understand, not even my dad. He wasn't even around when it happened so he couldn't think it was his fault. Little did I know at the time, that was the reason he blamed himself. We all blame ourselves Lucas, but in reality it is no ones fault. I had to snap out of it and realize that when death decides to take someone it is their time and can happen at any moment. I had to open my heart again and not bottle up the hurt inside. I had to breakdown, and I did. And that's what you have to do. Have you told anyone else about how you are feeling?"

"No. Everyone has there own problems to worry about. Not that you don't or anything. I just know you understand."

"Of course. So you haven't talked to Brooke?"

The moment Peyton mentioned Brooke my head snapped up. Talked to Brooke? Does she mean about the kiss? Does she mean there was something to tell? Oh my God you loser. Shut up. What is wrong with you? We are talking about you and how Keith dying has affected your life. Get over it.

"No, I just don't think it's the right time. I'm waiting."

"Waiting for what Lucas? It's never going to be the right time. If you keep it to yourself much longer, you will just hurt everyone around you even more. And this means Brooke especially. You know as much as me she doesn't want to be lied to. And we don't want to cause her anymore pain do we?"

We? What is she talking about now? I am just too confused because I have no idea what she is referring to now. I have to just play along.

"Did you end up telling anyone?"

"Of course. Who do you think? Brooke. She was amazing, supportive, and really just let me talk. She just listened without pushing."

"Brooke not pushing? Are we talking about the same Brooke Davis", I raised my eyebrow at her.

"I'm serious. She is really great in situations like these. She becomes this completely different person and it isn't about her at all. Anyone who says she's a selfish person doesn't know the real Brooke. She has this way of waking your soul up and reminding you there is still so much life in you left to live. That's where the Brooke we both know and love comes out. She makes you forget if even for a moment and makes you do something completely stupid and fun. You should talk to her Luke."

Listening to Peyton talking about Brooke and hearing all the things I already knew just warmed my heart. I don't know why I haven't gone to Brooke. She has woken my soul before, why did I think it wouldn't be the same this time. And I was relieved to know that Peyton wasn't even thinking about what happened in the library. I am going to talk to Brooke because I can't loose her. I don't want her to mistake my confusion for anger. She is the most important thing in my life now.

"I will. Thanks Peyton."

"No problem. I like being the one to save you once and a while."

We both smiled and I looked at my watch. An hour had already gone by and I knew Brooke would be back soon. I also wanted to check on my mother. She shouldn't be left alone too long.

"Okay well I better go."

"Sure, but are you forgetting something?"

I suddenly felt nervous again.

"No I don't think so."

"Oh so those flowers in your hand are not for me? I just assumed with me being in the hospital and all. Whatever dude." She held up her hands in defeat.

Peyton was a trip. It was great to see she still had her sense of humor through all this. Something I couldn't have.

"Of course. I forgot I even had them. Here get well soon."

Peyton rolled her eyes. "Well geez thanks Luke. You know this doesn't mean we are dating right."

She had a smile on her face and I knew she was kidding, but the whole thing made me uncomfortable and I couldn't laugh. Instead I just tried to act cool. Maybe try a little joke.

"Nah. I just give all the girls I rescue flowers. It's the superhero thing to do." I winked.

"See ya later."

"Thanks for coming Lucas."

"Thanks for being here Peyton."

"I had no where else to be. Well actually I couldn't go anywhere."

"Yeah. I hope you get released soon."

"Actually tomorrow. So I will be at the funeral."

Funeral. There it was. I was so upset I hadn't really been thinking about that. Actually having to sit in front of an open casket and see Keith's face again. I had to leave and get some air quick.

"That's good. See you then."

"Bye Luke."

As I walked down the hall, my chest got really tight and my heart started to pound. My palms were sweaty and my face was flushed. Suddenly it felt like 100 degrees in here. I had to walk fast. There was no way I could have one of my spells in the hospital. They would find out about the HCM and then everyone would know. That was the last thing anyone needed right now. I would be fine. I had to be fine. So many people needed me right now. So many people were counting on me. I decided to walk to the Rivercourt and chill out. Right as I arrived I hit the ground and everything went black...

End of Flashback

TBC