GENRE: Angst
MAJOR CHARACTERS: Fai, Kurogane.
DISCLAIMER: This is mere fiction, and I do not make any profit out of it one way or another. The characters belong to the respected manga-ka.
SUMMARY: It was not supposed to happen this way, but they're already involved. BEWARE, this ficlet spoils the latest chapters of TRC!
COPYRIGHT: ©August 2006
Involved
By mitmiya
His fingers gently ran random patterns on the dark red scarf, a blue eye watching as the fabric moved and followed the digits' direction. Fai rested his head lazily on one arm, his lips slightly parted as he breathed rhythmically, only to blow softly at the scarf sometimes, a dull eye watching it trying to escape his failed whistle.
A sigh escaped him, and Fai let his eyes drift shut, familiar scent tickling his nostrils as he pulled the scarf closer, and long fingers longed to rip through it as old rage started to boil his insides once again. He breathed in again and the smell nearly choked him, subduing the rage but causing tears to bicker in the back of his sole eye.
The fabric was smooth, cool beneath his fingertips but it sent waves of hot guilt to burn his heart. Long digits curled to make a tight fist, taking hold of the scarf and lifting it up and he ready to toss it out of his way, get rid of that sickeningly familiar scent.
He could not.
The mage lowered his arm, holding the piece of cloth to his chest. It was a month after it happened that the scarf was purchased, a month after he had turned into a creature that fed on the one he loved and that scarf was only there to cover the tracks of a crime he committed each day, of a survival act that he could never get used to, of love, hate, angst, rage and guilt.
He hated him for what he did, for what he wished, and he hated her for making it come true, for granting him what stole away and ruined his future. And he couldn't stop loving him, despite of all that happened, despite of his own wishes. Here he was, once again, bounded and chained against his will, forced on another situation by someone else despite of his kicks and screams.
It was the look on the two kids' faces that resulted in Kurogane's constantly worn scarf; Sakura's eyes were huge and round everytime she caught the sight of the two small punctures in the warrior's neck, and later on she avoided looking at him; awkward and embarrassed about her own reactions to their new reality. Syaoran tried to take it in as the young man he was rapidly developing into, but there were moments where he stared, awestruck and disbelieving.
Kurogane rarely took off that scarf, anymore, and it only succeeded in increasing the weight of guilt on the broad shoulders of Fai, who watched his prey hide behind long collars and a red scarf, and he was no longer able to look at him like he once did but no matter how much Fai ignored him, Kurogane was always around, whether it was to offer his daily drink or to only be there for him.
It was not supposed to happen this way.
This was not his wish.
A warm hand massaged his small back, and Fai felt the bed dip as a weight settled next to him. He took a deep a breath before turned to his side, a smile plastered on his face as a single blue eye stared into a pair of red ones, the hand coming to rest on one naked hip. His small grin never wavered as the smell intensified, attacking him mercilessly as his prey drew closer to him, pressing his thin lips against Fai's.
"Hyuu, Kuro-puu!" Fai face brightened, and he jumped to his knees and circled his arms around the slender neck, careful of the bruised side, "Did you have a nice shower, Daddy?"
Kurogane wrapped his limbs around the tiny waist of the mage, and held him close, his face still void of any emotions other than grimness and concern that seemed to be etched in each pore of his tanned skin. Fai's hands played with the scarf behind warrior's head as he kept staring into the disturbed red eyes.
"Kuro-pi, whatev--"
"Will you ever forgive me?"
He blinked, surprised at being interrupted and by the question he never saw coming, but before he could even part his lips, his hands let the scarf drop when Kurogane explained bluntly.
"For getting involved?"