Respect Me Not
Warnings: There still are mistakes in grammar, I think. Also Shounen-ai, which means malexmale love. NOT FOR KAIRI FANS! (or Naminé) Also, there might be some drug using, self-destructive activities and maybe some character deaths… Crossovers from Final Fantasy VII and VIII…
Pairings: SoraxRiku, one-sided SoraxAxel and RikuxKairi, WakkaxTidus, CloudxLeon, AerithxCid and maybe some more…
Disclaimer: Gaahh, I still don't own Kingdom Hearts or the songs I use here… :sobsob:
Reviews:
Thanks everyone, and I'm really sorry that it took me so damn long to update… Spare my life :lol:
Chapter 18, Bloody Tears
Riku arrived to Sora's yard and saw the said one sitting on the doorstep, resting his head on his knees, while hugging himself for warmth. His usually spiky hair was glued to his back and he looked so little… It was just like the times when Riku and Sora were younger…
"Sora…" Riku started, startling Sora, who fell to his back, "Did you forget your keys or something?"
"I, eh… uhh…" Sora laughed goofily, as he stood up, "Umm…Yeah…"
"Thought so." Riku chuckled wearily, before pulling his keys from his pocket and opening the door for Sora. Angelo jumped behind the brunette and dashed inside, followed by thorough wet Sora and Riku. "I have keys to your house, since you used to always forget yours when we were little, remember?"
Sora nodded shyly as he kicked his shoes off and walked inside. He was already used to move in his house, even if he couldn't see anything. He knew exactly where he had to turn so he'd get to kitchen and such.
Riku looked Sora's back, feeling a guilty throb in his heart. He really didn't want to tell Sora about Cloud… He didn't want to see his heart breaking all over and over again… There were too many things for Sora to worry already. Riku wondered if Sora's condition would ever get better if things would continue to go like this.
…He knew that eventually he'd have to see Sora fall apart, if he didn't do anything…
"Sora…" The silver-haired man said quietly, his head bowing down weakly.
"Hmm? What is it Riku?"
Riku closed his eyes and sighed heavily. He just couldn't… He couldn't tell Sora that his brother was really really sick…
"Riku, are you alright?" Sora asked, his voice full of genuine concern.
Riku stepped few steps closer the blind brunette, trying to hold back the tears, which burned back of his eyes. Only seeing Sora there, turning his head from left to right, trying to decide where to look, his blind eyes staring into the nothingness… Knowing that he couldn't do anything to help the one he loved the most... He felt so weak.
With a quick movement Riku pulled Sora into a gentle embrace, tying his strong arms around the younger one. Sora gasped and blinked his eyes, as pure confusion dominated his features.
"…R-Riku…" The brunette gasped, as he slowly returned the hug, and buried his face to Riku's chest, "…Riku, I…"
"Shush… You don't have to say anything." Riku whispered into Sora's ear, before kissing it gently. Sora shivered from head to toe and tightened his grip around Riku's shoulders.
Riku started guiding Sora towards the living room, and threw the younger one on top of the sofa, before climbing on top of him. The brunette gasped, yet he didn't do any gestures to escape. It was like he could have seen the silver-haired man on top of him, as he reached up to touch Riku's silky cheek.
Riku smirked faintly, and he leaned down, pressing his lips against Sora's.
But before Sora could even fully taste the sweet flavor of Riku's mouth, the feeling was gone. Riku sat up, and shook his head sadly.
"Riku, wh-what's wrong? Did I do something stupid? Oh my god, I'm sorry Riku!"
The silver-haired teen lifted his eyebrow, and stared Sora in disbelief, before chuckling lifelessly, "You did nothing wrong, hun… It's just… I didn't come here to make out with you… There's something you need to know…"
Sora's eyes started to become wet, and he sat up too.
"Cloud is…" Riku started, but stopped when he felt the smaller one's arms around his waist. He looked into those empty eyes, and felt like starting to cry too, "…Cloud is in the hospital… His… His condition is critical, and… He…"
Sora's eyes widened, and he started to sob immediately, "Wh-what? C-Cloud? Wh-what's wrong with him?"
"He…" Riku started and looked down. He gulped loudly, as he tried to find the easiest way to tell Sora the truth, "Cloud has a serious brain tumor."
Next thing Sora knew was that he was running down a long corridor of a hospital. He crashed on every wall and object, which came on his way, since he couldn't see where he was going. Not that he cared anyways…
"Sora!" Riku cried as he ran after the brunette, who nearly ran into an old lady, who was coming behind a corner. "Watch out!"
But Sora slowed his pace and breathed heavily in and out. Tears covered his face, and he didn't even bother to wipe them away.
"Sora, you just can't run around like that! Cloud's room is right here…"
Riku took Sora's hand and guided him into the room, where Cloud was lying on the bed, accompanied by Leon, Yuffie, Tifa and Sephiroth.
"Sora!" Tifa said and ran to the brunette and hugged him, "I think that you shouldn't be here…"
"Let me go!" Sora cried as he tried to push Tifa away. The black-haired woman was little taken aback from Sora's actions. She looked at Riku, who nodded his head, gesturing her to let go of the brunette.
Sora dashed forward, and fell on a bed, which was next to Cloud's bed. Everyone in the room stared at Sora's struggling to his brother's bed.
"Cloud!" Sora let out a loud cry, as he touched Cloud's cold arm, "Cloud! Please, answer to me! Cloud… You can't… do this to me! You can't leave me here!"
"He isn't gonna die yet, Sora." Leon stated from the corner, where he still was standing. Tears dimmed Sora's vision, and he leaned his head down on the bed.
"…Don't tell me that… He's g-gonna… die…"
Yuffie knelt next to Sora and patted his shoulder. She faked a really big smile on her lips and said: "Of course he won't die! We just need to get him some medications and he'll be okay again! There's no need to worry!"
"Yuffie." Tifa said firmly and narrowed her eyes to her sister.
Sora closed his eyes and took Cloud's hand into his. He inhaled a deep breath and let out the loudest scream he had ever made. Riku's eyes widened, Tifa covered her ears, Yuffie fell on her back, Sephiroth frowned, Wakka didn't know what to do and Leon just stood there.
"Sora… You're noisy…"
Sora quickly wiped his tears away, as he felt the hand tighten the grip around his hand.
"Cloud!" He cried and jumped to hug his brother, who was just about to try and sit up. "Thank God! Are you feeling okay?"
"Been better." He stated as he messed his brother's hair, smiling tiredly. Everyone in the room gathered around his bed and let out relieved sighs.
"Man, you really startled us, ya?" Wakka said and rolled his eyes.
Cloud smiled and bowed his head as an apology. He let his eyes wander around the room, but when he spotted the long silver-haired man, he gasped loudly.
"What are you doing here?" He asked, as he pointed Sephiroth with his finger. Terror and shock filled his eyes as he glared at the older man, who just shrugged and folded his arms.
"Saved your life. For now, at least." Sephiroth snorted, "I don't want to see something as beautiful as you are dying right in front of my eyes."
Leon gave nasty glares to Sephiroth. Hearing someone else talking about Cloud that way just made him feel so jealous. And somehow he knew that the whole scene was because of that silver-haired man, who now smiled his most charming smile.
"…Thanks… I guess…" Cloud said. He really couldn't remember what happened before he had passed out but he felt somewhat awkward when Sephiroth was around. He shook his head to drive the confusing thoughts away, before turning his head towards Leon.
"Can I talk with you for a moment." He asked, but felt Sora holding his hand tighter. "…Sora?"
"Cloud… I don't wanna lose you too…" Sora said quietly. The blonde lifted his eyebrow and looked at Riku who had his eyes closed and back leaned on the wall. He didn't mean to tell Sora yet…
"I guess the secret's out…" Cloud sighed wearily, "I didn't want you to know about it Sora. I though that… that I could pay the treatment by myself, but… I'm sorry. But I won't leave you, I promise."
Sora lifted his head from the bed, "Really?"
"Yes, really. Now, I wanna change few words with Leon, okay?"
"Okay…" Sora said and stood up. "I love you, Cloud."
"I love you too Sora, you silly head." The blonde man chuckled, as he pushed Sora gently on the shoulder, "Go now."
The brunette nodded and left the room, with everyone else but Leon, who was still standing in his corner. Cloud eyed him for a while, before looking away. He knew he didn't have much time left, so that's why he wanted to say it out loud. Those three simple words, why they were so hard to say?
"Leon, I…" He started, but something stopped him. Leon would probably start to hate him, but… There might be no other chance. So was there really anything to lose? "Leon, I…"
"Yes, you said that already. Get down to the business already." The brown-haired man snorted and came closer to Cloud, who blushed slightly.
"I just… Leon, I…"
"And again."
"LEON!" Cloud cried and banged back of his head to the bed. "Fine, I'm not saying anything anymore!"
Leon chuckled and folded his arms above his chest. Cloud pouted like Sora, and narrowed his eyes to the brunette.
"Meanie." He hissed. He really wanted to tell Leon how he felt, but… It just wasn't easy. "Leon, really, listen… This'… important."
The scar-faced man frowned, and sat on Cloud's bed.
"I wanna tell you something… before… you know… I die. I know that I'll die…" Cloud said, inhaling a shaky breath. Talking about your own death isn't easy… "I hope that you aren't gonna start despise my memory, after I'm dead because of this… But…"
Leon growled, "It's okay, just tell me already what you wanna say."
"Leon I think that I… that I… I l-love you." Cloud gasped and then his face to a pillow. Leon lifted his eyebrow and smirked.
"That's it?" He said, and snatched the pillow from Cloud.
"What do you mean tha…- mmpffh!" Cloud wasn't able to finish his sentence, because of pair of lips covered his own.
In the hospital corridor Sora sat near Riku and held his hand tightly. The others had left to search for a cafeteria, leaving the two men alone. Silence surrounded them, and only distant sounds could be heard.
"He's not gonna make it." Sora said suddenly, "He's gonna die, isn't he?"
"Sora, I… I don't know." Riku replied weakly. He turned his head towards the brunette, who kept his head bowed down. His face was pale and his hands were cold. His already distant and hollow eyes were even duller.
"I don't wanna lose him like I lost my dad…" Sora whispered quietly, "I just… I… I can't… He… Cloud can't just die, can he?"
Riku frowned deeply, "We don't know for sure yet… There's always hope. But… How did your father die? No one ever told me…"
Sora's eyes widened, and he quickly turned his head away from Riku. He felt tears burn in the back of his eyes. Sometimes not knowing is better than knowing it all. Sometimes, you just wish that you could wash the memories away.
"Well…" Sora said and gulped loudly, to smother the sobs, "…It was a dark day…"
Flashback
Heavy clouds eclipsed the sun, and few drops of water fell on the ground. Dark atmosphere surrounded an empty city of Tokyo. Everyone had gone inside, to hide from the storm, which was about to hit the city every time now.
However, there was one figure, running down the streets, trying to reach his refuge before it started to rain heavily. 7-years old Sora dashed towards his home, pouting all of the time.
"Dad promised to come and get me today…" The figure mumbled, and tried to keep his brown hair from falling down on his face.
He reached a street, where there was still few people, getting into cars, or running into the tall block of flats'.
Suddenly, there was a horrible scream. Sora tilted his head towards the sound and frowned.
"WATCH OUT!"
"EEEK!"
"GET OUT OF THE WAY IDIOT!"
Sora's eyes widened as he saw a huge oil truck coming his way, tossing around aimlessly, as the driver has lost the control over the large car.
Everyone ran and screamed. Panic and chaos filled the street. And Sora just stood there, unable to move or even think. The truck came closer and closer. The bright lights shone to Sora's face, but he couldn't even close his eyes.
Then, like out of nowhere, appeared a small passenger car, stopping between Sora and the oil truck.
There were more screams, loud noises and two metals crashing against each other. Sora saw, how the smaller car was crushed against a wall by the truck, which now stopped moving. The bright blue eyes grew wider and wider, as he could see the whole scene at the slow motion. Blood splashed on the car's window, and the car's windshield broke into million pieces.
But what was the most terrifying thing was that the car belonged to Sora's father.
"D-dad!" Sora cried quietly, as he forced his feet to move towards the crushed car. "DAD!"
The last few steps, Sora ran and he reached the white car, where his father was inside. He tried to tear the door open, but it didn't even budge.
"DAD!" He screamed on top of his lungs as he pulled the hardest he could.
Soon the door opened a little, and Sora could see inside. His eyes widened and they were filled with tears.
"Sora…" The man inside of the car mumbled, as he turned to look at his son, "Don'…t look, go away…"
But the brunette just stood there, watching his father's crushed body. The smell of blood lingered in the air. It made Sora feel like throwing up. Tears dimmed his vision, no matter how many times he blinked. He rubbed his eyes, just to make sure this moment was real, not just a mere dream.
"Dad…?" Sora said. He stared at his father's body. It was even more crushed than the car was. And his face… There was no skin on his forehead, and fragments of glass stuck out on his skin.
"So…ra… Go… away…" He said breathlessly as his eyes slowly turned lifeless, and the hand he had been reaching towards Sora, fell on the chair next to him. Blood started to pour down from the car onto the asphalt.
Sora's mouth opened in shock, as he jumped into the car, to hug his father's corpse. "…Don't leave me…! It was my fault! DON'T GO!"
Tears fell down on the dead man's bloody cheeks, as Sora cried on top of him, "Don't go…"
"Dad…?" Sora said, as he looked at his father, "…Why are you crying?" He blinked, as he wiped away the blood coming from his father's eye, where was a piece of class sticking in, "Why your tears are red?"
Sora stepped out of the car, looking at his hands, which were now covered by his father's blood.
He looked up at the sky, and suddenly it started to rain really heavily. Sirens of ambulance and police cars filled the cold air, as the rain poured down and washed away the blood.
"This' not real!" Sora screamed, and fell on the asphalt, his tears blending with the rain "This' just a dream!"
End of the Flashback
"But it wasn't a dream." Sora said, his voice more hollow than it had ever been. "I wish that I could just… forget… I… I still can't forget what my dad's face looked like. That shocked look in his face… He was afraid, I saw it in his eyes…"
Riku didn't know what to say. He never knew what had happened to Sora's father. "I'm so sorry Sora."
"…I wish that he'd stop haunting me. I know it's my fault he's dead." Sora continued, "If I was stronger…"
"Sora… Don't blame yourself, since it's not your fault at all." Riku said, warm smile on his lips, as he wrapped his arms around the other man.
Sora sniffed and buried his head on Riku's chest. And then he just cried.
"So, you're going out with Wakka now, right?" Selphie asked, as he lied on Tidus' bed.
"Well… Yea. I guess."
Selphie spun around, and eyed the blonde who was lying next to her. She giggled and poked his stomach, "Hehehee, that's sooo cool! And cute too, of course!"
Tidus frowned and mumbled something about weird shounen- ai fangirls.
"I mean, honestly! Isn't it awesome you can be with someone you like?" Selphie's eyes twinkled as she kept poking Tidus' stomach, "But what about Cid? Does he know about you and Wakkie yet? And if he does, what did he say?"
Tidus closed his eyes and sighed heavily.
"Oh… I take that as a no… Well… Are you gonna tell him?"
"I can't." Tidus replied, turning his face towards Selphie, "He'd kill me. He couldn't stand the fact I'm gay. He'd hate me forever… Probably abandon me or murder me."
"But…" Selphie tried to think something positive to say, but didn't know how to cheer up the blonde. He was right, Cid would never understand. She sighed and shook her head, "Well, I guess you just have to keep it as a secret then. Parents just have this weird ability to discover every little secret their children tries to hide."
Tidus chuckled, "Yea like Sora's mom. You can't hide anything from her… It's kinda scary how she always knows everything about anything."
"Haha, yea think about it when you move to live with Sora, Cloud and Aerith! It'll be like a really big chaos!" Selphie laughed, "You and Sora probably destroy the whole house before you can say 'Melancholic Requiem'."
"Pfft, yea right." Tidus rolled his blue eyes, "But speaking of which, have you heard that song Riku sang to Sora?"
"Hell yea, it was soooooo cute!" Selphie squealed and jumped up and down on the bed, "I wish my boyfriend would sing something as cute to me too someday!"
"You don't even have a boyfriend… do you?"
"Not yet!" Selphie poked her tongue out and jumped on the floor, "But I'll marry some really rich singer! And I'll make him sing me love songs all day long!"
Tidus snickered, "You're silly Selphie."
"I know I am!" Selphie winked, before jumping back on the bed and tickling Tidus' sides.
CC: I did it. I like… really did it… Wow…
Riku: …What's so cool about that?
CC: It took me so long. Months…
Sora: Well better late than never!
Riku: How can you always be so positive Sora? CC's a lazyass.
CC: I know I know… Anyways, review, and I'm really sorry it took me so long to update.