LadyKayoss- Lol! 'Wussiest thief ever!' that's true, that's true. Spidey never stole before, and he just wakes up having a nervous breakdown that he's not in his body anymore; and then all the sudden he steals on the same day? Well. Enjoy this chapter, my friend.(and I know I'd find ithardto resist if I get a chanceto put on the suit...if it fits me, lol)
C. D. Anders- Shiv! What's up man? He's reading my fanfic! SQUEE! Okay, uh, you seem hyper while reviewing... here's another chappie then! Enjoy!
Everyone else- Thanx for reviewing! And now we're back to reading up chapter 4 of Swap shock courtesy of the very odd but Ottophilic mind of me!
(read and review!)
Chapter 4— The Cat fight
Peter-Otto felt stupid. Here he was, standing in the opposite side of the front apartment room from Otto-Peter, who was just as confused as he.
Peter-Otto was without the trenchcoat and was wearing "Peter's" spare over-sized shirt and jogging pants and socks. The four actuators poked four holes in his shirt (and Peter sighed in annoyance of that fact).
Otto-Peter, in the other hand, took advantage of being free from the arms, by wearing a clean buttoned shirt and khaki pants. His hair was messy and...curled("Hey! Why you curl my hair for!" says Peter, "Why did you straighten my hair like that then?" say Otto.).
Both men, after breakfast, were given the chance to get dressed and all. And now they're working together to think of something to bring each other back.
"In the count of three," Otto explained out, "both of us will run towards each other."
"For what particular reason again?" Peter smirked, acting smug and sarcastic.
"To get our bodies back, duh!" Otto scowled. "Just cooperate with me so we could get on with this!"
"Whatever. How do we know this isn't going to work?" Peter got into a runner's position.
"I don't know, Peter! We are both scientists, and we must experiment something, correct?" Otto got himself in a runner's position. "Ready? One..."
"THREE!" Screamed an embarrassed Peter Parker, hurriedly running at the other man so he could get on with it.
"Damn," sighed a confused and annoyed Otto who proceeded the same, though just one step behind.
They began to run--
Watch father run!
Yay father!
--they crashed into each other---
Is this going to work?
I have nooooo idea...there was no logic to this.
BANG!
"OW!" screamed both men, who each collapsed to the ground.
"Goddammit," Otto cursed, "that hurts..."
"Any more of your brilliant plans, doc?" a sarcastic Peter sat up, massaging his forehead.
"How about you shut up?"
Later on in the same apartment, Peter and Otto both sat on the couch, ice packs in their foreheads. Otto, mumbling, turned on the TV.
"---there were sighting of Doctor Octopus in the east side of New York," the news, "who was later spotted at a Walgreens stealing what possibly could be drugs. Here is an amateur footing of the earlier sightings..."
The TV shows Peter-Otto from earlier that morning, running and screaming like he was on fire.
"Wha?" Otto would've laughed, if that wasn't his body. "What the hell was that, Pete!"
"Well, sooorry! I didn't wake up in the right side of the bed."
Then they showed a store camera's footing where Peter-Otto sneezed and dropped the cold medicine at the store.
"Here is New York's question: is Doctor Octopus on drugs, or does he have a cold? Investigators will investigate more in this matter."
Peter began to chuckle. "Doc Ock on drugs, he he."
Otto flipped the channels. "Haw haw, Parker. It's not like I'm humiliated enough."
"So...what are we going to do? I don't wanna stay stuck in this fat lardof a body!"
Otto shot a look at Peter. "I'm not that fat," Otto growled, "just big-boned. I have muscles too, you know."
"Yeah right." Peter raised his arm and showed him the 'big' arm. "This thing is gotta be worth 6 inches in width...of fat!"
Otto stood up and lifted his shirt. "What about you, bony-boy? Turning dyslexic?" Otto was determined to take defense.
"What are you talking about? I'm not bony! I got a perfectly good, fat-decent (mind you), body!" Peter stood up. "Plus, I have more muscles than you!"
"Toothpick!"
"Over-weight king!"
"Donut-hole weight!"
"Calorie addict!"
"Skinny schmuck!"
"Lardo retardo!"
"Ashley-Olsen-weight wanna-be!"
"Oreo-hog!"
"Gay-tights clown!"
"Sushi food!" Peter began to shove Otto.
"Pajama boy!" Otto shoved back.
"Fatty fat fat!"
They began to wrestle in the apartment.
"Reckless, immature brat!"
"Fatty fat fat...fat!"
"Oh, you're gonna get it now, sucker!" Otto gritted his teeth, hitting Peter continuously with the couch pillow.
"Hey! Ay! I got a headache!" Peter crawled around the floor, getting hit continuously over and over. He screamed in thought to the arms. Why aren't you guys helping me?
We are very loyal to our father, Parker, and if he wants to beat you or his body up, then so be it.
Wussies.
Besides, you "children" needs to solve it your selves.
Peter stopped and took another pillow, beating 'Ock' back at him. They were beating each other up, soon laughing at this childish behavior. Otto calling Peter names? That ain't right...
"Peter?"
Both men stopped to the sound of a woman's voice. Otto panicked. Is that MJ? But it came from the window. Both men looked.
There was a woman in tight black leather, with silver long hair and stunning blue eyes. She stood confused. Spidey and Ock beating each other up with pillows? What's going on here?
"Oh, hi Cat. Whoa, whoops..." Peter-Otto gasped his mouth.
"Octopus? How did you know my name? We didn't meet, did we?"
"Cat...?" Otto-Peter looked from Peter-Otto to the woman at the window. What the hell...?
"Peter, what's going on?"
"W-we can explain." Peter blurted out once more and shut his mouth again.
Otto began to scowl. Is this what he thinks this is?
"Uh, excuse me, 'Cat'," Otto raised a pointing finger before she talks, "can 'Otto' and I have a word with each other, alone?"
"Ooookay...?" poor girl, so confused.
"Come on, Pete, I mean Otto," Otto muttered, pulling the man in his body to the bedroom and closed the door.
Cat watched confusingly. Are they like, gay or something? She thought to herself. No, Spidey couldn't, he loves MJ. Maybe he's bisexual. He's always whining how he couldn't save Ock from 'drowning'...
Peter was confused as well. "What did you want to say? Why couldn't you say it back there?"
"You're cheating Mary Jane," Otto assumed, crossing his arms. "I am not very happy with that. I thought you knew better!"
"What? No! I'm not cheating on her!" Peter laughed, "Black Cat is my friend! She sometimes help me with the crime-fighting and stuff. She often gives me female advice to help me with my relationship with Mary Jane and stuff. No, no sexual advice."
"Uh-huh. Cheater."
"I'm not a cheater!"
"Okay, fine, I'll believe you, but if I get any unwanted advances from your lady friend, I'm telling MJ everything."
"Whatever." Peter shugged. "What are we going to do with her? She's very confused. First we were pillow-fighting, then you tell me to talk to you alone."
"I dunno—"
The door knocked twice. "Peter? Ock? Are you ladies okay?"
"Let's tell her," Peter nodded, "maybe she could help. We can't tell Mary Jane, she'd freak out."
"And she won't?" Otto raised a brow. "Okay, fine..."
Peter-Otto hurriedly opened the door, "Felicia, you need to come in quick!"
"What's the hurry?"
"Sit here." Peter-Otto had Cat sit on top of the unmade bed.
"Okay, where to begin...?" Otto-Peter asked, realizing that this won't be easy...
"Felicia, you know me as Doc Ock, right?" Peter began, pointing to himself.
"Uh...yeah?"
"I'm Doc Ock, but, I'm not."
Felicia made a funny look. "Huh?"
"A-and this is Peter, but he's not either."
"W-what are you guys saying? Peter, what is he saying?"
Otto-Peter looked at Peter-Otto and then at Felicia. "Listen, whoever is in this body, the same person you knew before, the same guy you talk to and give advice to is in this body over there. My body."
"Your...body?"
"Yeah. And I am—whoever occupied Doc Ock's body---is in this body."
"Felicia, to make things short and uncomplicated, me and Otto...we both swapped bodies."
Felicia was quiet. She looked from Peter-Otto and rolled her eyes over to Otto-Peter, and back and forth. Then, she began to laugh like she was crazy.
"Ha ha ha haha!"
Otto sighed at Peter. Peter shugged.
"Ha ha, okay, ha, lemme get this straight," Felicia tried to control her laughter, "you, Otto no, Pete, is in Doc Ock's body, right?"
Peter nodded cheerfully. "Yeah! Yeah!"
"And you, Doctor Octopus, you're in Spider-man's body?"
Otto nodded slowly. "Yeah, unfortunately."
Felicia laughed like crazy once more.
"You guys, ha ha, has got to be messing with me! Certainly, I don't know where you got these ideas from, or maybe you guys were trying to flirt with me or something, but I am not stupid, okay?"
Otto shrugged. "I knew she wouldn't believe us."
"Well, even if you boys did 'swap'," Felicia spoke, making the quotation mark sign with her two hands and fingers, "how do you guys suppose of why you guys swapped in the first place?"
"I have been thinking about it for a while," Otto-Peter suggested, "but I think that by a simple law of electromagnetism and Hobbes' law of hormonal and personality changes that due to the identities in this dimensions of one living creature to another in body is the same equations of when it was battery tested to switch an apple's insides with an orange's outsides and vice versa and with the radiowaves transmitted from one living organism to another organism, we could just naturally wake up one morning believing that Peter is Otto and Otto is Peter, or unless due to Pascal's law of switching memories that we both have sudden amnesia and we accidentally recovered each other's memories, therefore leaving Peter to believe that he is me because he has my memories or knowledge or personality and leaving me to believe that I was Peter because I have his memories and knowledge and personality as well. But either cannot be because both must be triggered by of high energy through such speed of 1,000,000 gigliowatts minus kilowatts per milisecond, but that is real, real, fast, though both of us were electrocuted at the same time last night. But unless by Locke's law of gravitational electricity movement blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah..."
While Otto-Peter blurts out on and on like an energizer bunny, a wide-eyed strickened Cat and a laughing Peter-Otto looked at each other wierdly.
"Oookay..." Felicia nervously laughed to Peter-Otto, "I believe you guys now. Peter...right? Okay. This is soooo Freaky Friday or The Chick!."
"You're telling me. I'm stuck in this body! Would you ever think I'd go off blabbing on and on like that?"
Cat giggled. "Sometimes. You both are nerds!"
"Haw haw. Uh, Otto? You can stop now. Take a breath!"
"—and so I need a simple demonstration with two light bulbs and two...what?" Otto haven't realized he was still talking.
Felicia was giggling some more. "Breathe, Otto! Breathe!" Peter jokingly tapped his friend's shoulder.
"Oh, damn, I did it again. I hope I didn't bore you guys too bad."
"Ha! Remember when we first met? We were blabbing on and on to each other, and even Rosie fell asleep while reading her book and we still were talking!" Peter-Otto elbowed his friend.
"Yeah, its geekfest in here! Look, guys, it is just...too freaky for me. I'm going to go home and try to figure something out. Maybe I'll talk to Harry about it, see what he could make out of it."
"Wait, what? Harry? Like, Harry Osborn?" Otto-Peter was confused. "W-we can't tell anyone! Well, just not yet. We just switched this morning."
"Relax! Harry knows I'm Spider-man now. Yeah, Cat, help us in anyway on how to find out how to get our bodies back. Please."
Felicia smiled, ready to leave the room to leave the apartment. "Hey, what are friends for anyway? Well, later then!"
She left out the window. The boys watched her go and said bye.
"Well, that was a cheerful heroine," Otto crossed his arms.
"Yup, one of a kind. Though...ha ha," Peter smirked, "'Hobbes' law of hormonal and personality changes'? 'Pascals' law of switching memories'? 'Locke's law of gravitational electricity'...what, 'movement'?"
"I honestly don't know, Parker! I had to make up something to have her believe that Ock would be me."
"Though, the apples and oranges thing is kinda cute, the way you said of how the outside of an apple would switch to have the inside of an orange and so forth."
"Ah, you actually paid attention!" Otto pointed jokingly at Peter.
Okay, lol, I'm stopping before anyone falls asleep here! I actually didsome references in this chapter, one from "Falling feels like flying" by erinflanagin (in the last chapter...very similar from the last piece...sorry bud, couldn't resist!), Freaky Friday and The Chick(both are movies about 'switcheroos') and from the Boy Genius comics ("fatty fat fat", "Oreo-hog").
What? You never heard of Boy Genius? Then goto nicklogic dot com slash boygenius! You must read them if you're an Ottophilic (Otto-lovin'!) person!
sayonara,
Silver.