When Aragorn woke the next day and learned that Faramir had packed up and left in the night, he was livid. Not with his son, but with himself. Would he never learn the tact needed to broach difficult subjects? Only now was he getting a glimpse of how Elrond must have felt when he ran off in the night fifty years ago. For twenty years he and his had done everything together, they had been so close, and now despite, or possibly because of that, his son was gone.
Aragorn hadn't touched food all day when Elrond brought him some bread and fruit, along with a draught of miruvor. Aragorn was reluctant to take anything, saying, "it is because of me that he has gone."
"Was it because of me that you left at his age?" Elrond asked.
"No, not entirely, but -"
"How can you think that this is different? It is not your fault that Faramir left, but that he was overwhelmed to think that you are heir to a kingdom. It is really rather something to get adjusted to. He just needs his own time, Estel."
"I didn't explain to him that nothing is written about him anyone's records. He thinks that his future is decided for him because of who i am. I was going to wait, give him time, as you said, before i approached him again and explained that i did not expect him to bear the title of my heir. For twenty years i have worked to keep that burden from him. I know the life he wanted to have, and because of my foolishness he now believes that he can not have that life. All i wanted, since the day he was born, was for him to be happy. I have failed him completely."
Elrond took his "youngest" in his arms comfortingly. "How many times in the last fifty years have i believed that i failed you?" he whispered.
"You have not, father," Aragorn said, now struggling to speak.
"And nor have you failed Faramir. He simply needs his time, as you needed yours," Elrond said, pouring a bit of miruvor for his son.
Only several days later a number of arrivals converged on Imladris at once. Halbarad came first to sue for Aragorn to come with him to help their numbers in their guard on the Shire. For several years had he and Faramir been doing their part in serving with the Dúnedain Rangers off and on, but the Rangers had not seen them in nearly eight months and were growing desperate for their help again. Elrond had judiciously held Halbarad off until the other group arrived knowing who his son would benefit most from seeing first.
Later in the afternoon arrived Glorfindel and the twins with Arwen and Gandalf. Aragorn had been inconsolable and it was purely fortune that brought Arwen back at the time when Aragorn most needed her.
Unfortunately, before Aragorn had a chance to have a moment alone with his beloved and explain what had happened, Halbarad came upon them with relief in his eyes. "At last i find you! I need you and Faramir to come back with me as soon as possible, we can not keep up -"
Gandalf interrupted the Ranger, though, saying "I am afraid your company shall have to do, for i am also in need of Aragorn and Faramir and my need is greater."
Before Aragorn could say anything an argument broke out between the Ranger and the Wizard over who was in greater need. The twins only added to the argument by offering to go with Halbarad and telling him that he ought to let their baby brother and nephew get some rest once in a while. Glorfindel was no help either as he offered his help to Gandalf, which caused Erestor to put in his two cents worth regarding the fact that the Vanya was already scheduled for patrols, with the twins, for at least the next five years and he was not about to change those schedules that he had just finished. Elrond, in his wisdom, had walked away from the mêlée and Arwen was quiet, sensing that something was very wrong with her beloved.
Aragorn listened to all of this for about five minutes before his nerve broke. "Can not you all just give me peace?" he shouted wearily. "Only five days ago i lost my son and all you can do -"
Aragorn was cut off by a collective "what!" Halbarad looked more leaguered than upset, muttering something to the effect that they could scarcely afford to lose another man. The twins and Glorfindel stood in shock and Gandalf lowered his head. The tears stood still in Arwen's eyes as she softly said, "i did not even sense it."
"Another mistake," Aragorn thought to himself. "My son is not dead," he said rather miserably. "He left here five days ago."
"Well, gods, man, go after him!" Halbarad said in annoyance that his leader had so little influence over his own son.
"Will you kindly shut up?" Glorfindel said in a rather threatening tone while advancing on the Ranger. The twins, Arwen, and Gandalf were too relieved to say anything.
After a moment Elladan said quietly, "what happened, Estel?"
"Do you mind if we do not discuss this on the front steps?" Aragorn said, plainly not wishing to say anything more.
"I think that is rather a good idea," Erestor said, jumping in practically on cue. "You will all find your rooms prepared, please take your ease. Supper will be served in a couple hours." Erestor glanced at the sun to check his time and then hurried off the kitchen to make sure everything was moving along.
Arwen immediately went to her lover. "Estel...?"
Aragorn just held her tightly. "Gods, but i've missed you," he whispered. "No, i am all right. It is just... i have not been a day without my baby boy since he was born. Go on, take your rest before supper. I will be in ada's study."
By the time all involved reassembled in Elrond's study Elrohir was ready to ride out after Faramir, if only to watch out for him. Elladan disagreed, knowing that it would not help at the moment and pointing out that they did not go after Estel.
"I know we did not," Elrohir said, "but we also knew he was leaving."
"No," Elrond said, siding with Elladan, "Faramir is more than well equipped to take care of himself, and he does need this time. As for the two of you, and Glorfindel, i also agree with Erestor. The schedules are set and we need the three of you here."
"And what about my - Aragorn's men?" Halbarad put in. "We need more help to cover the Shire, since that is what Gandalf has insisted must be done. We used to be able to call on two extra Rangers, only now one has flown the coop and we are down to our Chieftain. Unless we have come into some luxury of recruits that we can afford to have our Rangers dying of exhaustion..."
"Well, now Gandalf needs your Chieftain for a slightly more important mission - one that, if it works, could make your mission less imperative," Gandalf said to Halbarad in a slightly heated tone. "But it must commence immediately," he said turning his attention to Aragorn again. "You likely do not recall, but i wanted your help two years ago, but you were not willing to pull you manpower away from the Shire."
"I would not because i had no satisfactory explanation of what manner of mission you wanted me for," Aragorn retorted.
"Estel," Elrond said, calling his son aside. "I know this has been difficult for you, but i urge you to remain peaceful for now. Faramir will be all right, you simply must trust me. This mission that Gandalf speaks of... i can not say much now, but it involves...," Elrond glanced over his shoulder and lowered his voice even further, "the One."
Aragorn turned, staring at Gandalf. "The One" could mean a couple of things: either Gandalf had some clues about Sauron's ruling ring... or this had something to do with Eru Ilúvatar. At the moment, Aragorn was hoping for Eru. He looked back at his father. "What if he comes back and i am not here?"
"Then i will see to it that he knows how much his father, and grandfather, love him. Though, i think that you may well see him before i," Elrond said. "Go with Gandalf. Your Dúnedain will keep, they are more hardy than Halbarad gives them credit for, and more than this they will be taxed in years to come. Understand Estel, this is only the beginning. Much now depends on our every action, or inaction."
So it was that Aragorn agreed to go with Gandalf to search for Gollum. His heart was never really in it though, and before long he became as grim as he was before Faramir's birth. It did not help that Gilraen had come to Imladris only days before he left with Gandalf. She looked unwell when she arrived and it distressed her to learn that her beloved grandson had left Rivendell on his own. Aragorn had a strange feeling when he left that he might never see his mother again and he feared that he might never see his son again either. Aragorn's one comfort was that his love had returned to Lorien and that, at intervals, he was able to rest there and be near to her.
After years spent in the Wold and in and about the Gladden area Aragorn and Gandalf returned to Imladris for respite. Gandalf, of course, had been searching with Aragorn only now and then; where he was the rest of the time was unknown to his companion. Aragorn took little rest but instead went to give his aid to Halbarad, thinking that perhaps through hard, relentless work he could atone for the wrongs in his life.
The year was 3007, Aragorn had not seen Faramir in four years and clung only to a small hope that his son had returned to Imladris while he had been away. Not only was that hope dashed upon his return, but he was very nearly completely broken to learn of his mother's death earlier in the year. For nearly two years his hope was shattered and he was of little use in the North. Elrond had to marvel that a person could survive in such despondency, after all, his own wife could not. It was a testament to the strength that was left in Men, in that one Man in particular, and he never lost hope in Aragorn.
Two years later, Gandalf finally got tired of Aragorn's brooding about and feeling sorry for himself. Things were getting entirely too dangerous and it was getting desperate that they find Gollum before someone else. Instead of confining their search so close to the mountains, Gandalf insisted that they needed to move further east this time, through Anduin's vales, Mirkwood, and out to Rhovanion. Considering how fruitless their last search had been, Aragorn was figuring on this not taking much more than say, oh, another six ages.
ooo
Next chapter will be Fara-centric. At this rate, give me about five minutes and i will have it up as well.
linda: I think Aragorn's hair might be starting to grey. Anyway, i hope this chapter (and some of next) has sort of given a clearer impression of why Faramir left. It wasn't really that he was angry with Aragorn or anything, and also Aragorn didn't get (or take) the chance to tell him that he is not counted his heir unless he wishes to be. But yeah, i did need an excuse to get him to leave Imladris :)
steelelf: As i have said, i do AU, but not that much!
grumpy: I'd say the only thing worse than a child not being where you left it is a grown child who leaves on his own.
Elenhin: You know no apologies are necessary, not to me. I could slow down a bit, if you would prefer it :) Hopefully you will catch this update, as i only just saw your reviews come in before posting. I plan to have a few flashbacks, perhaps in the next chapter or two. I can not wait to write this next chapter and i may even have it up by tonight.