Well now! After a very close vote between Deidara and Zetsu... The winner was...

"Alright. Now that we have those two off the list, for now, next we'll go visit…" After a dramatic pause, with Kisame bowing his head so his face was in the shadow of his detective hat, Kisame looked up his face looking sexy and serious. He stopped all of a sudden, thought, murmured something about fixing his face, looked back down, looked up again with a cheesy fish face, and finally spoke. "Zetsu."

Itachi gasped, feeling quite faint. The craziness meter, somehow sticking to his forehead upside-down, was slowly falling, but that's only because it was upside-down. If right side up, it would be rising. But if it were sideways, it would be going sideways… and if it were sideways the other way, it would still be going sideways. The things that never make sense.

Kisame nodded in sorrow. Everyone knew that Zetsu was very secretly a cannibal. How else did he get rid of the bodies so well? And who likes cannibals? Why, other cannibals, of course! "I bet… He stole it… in hopes of luring you to his lair, so he could cook you slowly in a tiny microwave, Itachi-san. No matter, Detective Kisame is here! We'll find the very secret diary in no time!

Suddenly, Itachi did something, showing that he was beginning to loose it. He cracked a grin. Kisame almost died with fright right there! For what's scarier than seeing a crazed Uchiha cracking a smile? A crazed Uchiha laughing, of course!

"Hurry, Itachi-san!" Kisame grabbed his cloak and led the way to the very secret… Greenhouse!

The very secret greenhouse was located just outside the very secret Akatsuki base, just beyond a very secret line of trees and a very secret hill. Kisame and Itachi peeked in to see Zetsu himself, coaxing a plant to grow.

"Zetsu! Where were you an hour ago?" Kisame called from the safety of the door. He was sure the plant man would love to have fish flavored human for dinner. And he wasn't about to be that fish flavored man.

"Shark Flavor." Itachi coughed. "Stop thinking out loud."

Kisame looked at Itachi all serious-like. "Itachi-san, now is not the time for-"

"What do you mean, where was Zetsu an hour ago?" Zetsu growled in a light, fairy like voice.

"Zetsu was out here growing his very legal plants." Zetsu growled again, this time with a deep, female like voice with a hint of man.

"And just what is this very legal plant?" Itachi asked, the grin still on his face.

"Weed." The light fairy voice responded.

"No, its Pot!" the deep voice growled. The voices began arguing with one another.

"Weed!"

"Pot!"

"Weed!"

"Pot!"

Kisame gasped. "Oh no!"

Soon, Zetsu was trying to punch himself. And all because his two different personalities couldn't figure out that Pot and weed were both marijuana.

"Aren't they the same thing?" Itachi suggested. Suddenly he hiccupped. And he began to laugh. Like. A. Little. Girl.

"Oh my fishies! Itachi's giggling!" Kisame about died right there again. How could this be happening?

"Hey. Fishy." Kisame then noticed. Everything had gone silent. Turning slowly and painfully, he saw at fifteen foot Zetsu towering over him.

"I'm Hungry."

Only after excreting a smelly yellow liquid and grabbing a giggling Itachi did Kisame run.

Back at the Very secret Akatsuki base, Kisame and Itachi stopped for breath. They had run over the very secret hill and through the very secret line of trees as if there were no tomorrow. And if Zetsu caught up, there wouldn't be any tomorrow.

"All… Right… Ita… chi…. San… Next… We'll… go… see…"

A) Deidara

B) Sasori

C) Tobi

D) Leader-sama

E) A randomly passing-by Lee

Okay everyone! Vote for the next character! Remember, you can only do so in a review! And we all luff reviews...

Shikamaru: I still think this is troublesome.

Kankurou: Oh get used to it, we're here more than you are.

Kiba: We're supposed to be talking about the fanfic, you guys.

Kankurou: No, we're just here to waste room and entertain.

Lee: Yosh! Review and Vote!