I'm doing my best to keep this going.

(-)

Vanya had a secret. She refused to talk about it, but he noticed that she took longer in the shower and seemed more relaxed afterwards. It made him paranoid, because no matter what she said, something had happened that had her masturbating so regularly. He knew he wasn't mature enough to inspire that kind of lust, so who was getting her so worked up?

It got bad enough that he resorted to pressing his ear to the wall between their rooms before she went to shower. He was scribbling nonsense on his wall to explain what he was doing there if she was listening to him.

All he heard was an appreciative hum before her folder containing her music closed. That wasn't much to go on. But after she left and headed down the hall to the bathroom, he quietly went into her room. She'd admitted that when she was "distracted" she didn't hear him moving, but his shifts unfailingly got her attention.

He had to rifle through several pages of sheet music until he found what he was looking for: a picture. Not a photograph, though, but a sketch of a man. Slim but sturdy, with a knowing smirk.

Five's eyes got wide as he finally recognized the man. It was him. It took him a minute since he so rarely looked at himself after the apocalypse, but this was basically what he looked like back when he was Vanya's age. Where on Earth did she get this?

The implications were clear as well: Vanya had been getting worked up over him. Not what he looked like now, but what he would look like several years from now. She'd somehow gone out and got this drawing, and she was using it as inspiration for when she touched herself.

That immediately had him hot and bothered, because no matter how or why, he was making Vanya cum. He wanted so badly to touch her, to pleasure her, but this was a close second. In her mind…God, what was he doing to her? Five had plenty of ideas, so no doubt Vanya did too.

Staring at the picture and getting way too excited at the implications, he wasn't keeping track of time or his surroundings, so he jumped when the door opened.

Vanya said, "Five?" as she walked in and closed it behind her, wrapped in a towel and showing off so much beautiful skin. When she looked from his face to the picture in his hand, she went bright red, embarrassment and panic and anger warring for control of her face.

Then her towel slipped, nearly falling off, and he thought his heart might explode. Or a different body part. "Get out!" It was the kind of furious command he would obey even if he wasn't into submitting to her.

Setting down the picture on her desk, he shifted away before her anger could make her power lash out at him. In his room, he was breathing hard and his heart was racing from fear and arousal. Had that just happened? He'd nearly seen…he needed a nice long shower before he got ready for bed; this was going to require a certain level of level-headedness if he wanted to make it through the precarious situation he'd created.

(-)

Knocking on her door was daunting, but he'd violated her privacy once today, and he wasn't stupid enough to risk doing it again. When he didn't get a response, he knocked again, reminded of the night after his meeting with Diego. Was he going to walk in to a white-eyed enraged goddess?

The second time got an answer: "I don't know if I want you here, Five."

Ouch, that hurt. But her voice came from right on the other side of the door, lower down. He sat down and leaned back against the wood with a sigh. "I know. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to…see you like that. But please let me in; we need to talk. Not to mention we need to sleep, which I can't do without you." He hoped she wasn't angry enough to kick him out of her bed and into his.

After a pause, she said, "I don't want to talk about this."

Sighing, Five said, "But we need to, and I really don't want to do it while anyone can easily listen to my half of the conversation. Are you decent?" Because at this point, shifting in was probably the quickest way to get things moving.

"I don't feel decent," Vanya said in a soft, almost unheard voice.

Yeah, he hated that tone, and he hated that he'd made her feel like that. "I'm coming in."

He shifted into the middle of her room, facing the door. Vanya was sitting curled up on the floor, hugging her legs to her chest and her brown eyes were glaring at him with a mixture of anger and sadness. It would never cease to amaze him how badly he could screw up with her, worse than even his brain could predict.

"I'm sorry." It was all he could say as he looked in those eyes.

"You said that," she said flatly.

"And I clearly will never be able to say it enough, so I guess I should stop trying." Grasping for a place to start, he wondered if there was any safe topic in this situation. Finally he asked, "Where did you get that picture?"

That seemed to make her a bit less guarded as she said, "I saw an ad for someone who claimed they could draw the future, show what people would look like when they got older. It wasn't expensive, so I gave it a try. And it looks so much like you."

"It is me," Five said, still amazed. "I didn't look at my reflection a lot, but that's what I looked like back when I was your age."

The admission got a slight smile from her, if only for a moment. "Guess that artist has magic powers."

"Did you ask when they were born?" he asked, hoping a joke would lighten the mood. Because they were all aware there were others out there like them. They just happened to be the ones whose mothers would take money in exchange for their freakish child.

"I didn't realize it was so accurate, or I might have," she said, voice a little lighter. But then she frowned and curled up again. "This whole thing is incredibly weird and confusing, Five. I really don't want to talk about it."

"I'm pretty sure you'll feel better if we do," Five said. Because he couldn't go to sleep while Vanya had what were clearly ugly feelings inside her. "If nothing else, I owe you an explanation."

"You were jealous, and it made you nosy," Vanya said without hesitation. He supposed he couldn't be surprised she knew him well enough to read him. It was Vanya.

Smirking slightly, he asked, "Why would you think that?" Then he shook his head and got serious. "I don't know what's bothering you most about this, Vanya, but whatever it is, we can talk it through." He moved to kneel in front of her, one hand over hers as it held her legs tight to her chest. "No matter what happens, you and I will be fine, remember? You can tell me anything."

"That doesn't mean I want to tell you everything," Vanya said.

Okay, it was time to just dive in and get messy, because this was going nowhere. "So I guess I'm your masturbation aid."

Her face went bright red before her power surged out and knocked him away from her, sprawled on the floor. She got up and sat on the bed, turned towards the wall. Sitting up, he said, "I deserved that. That wasn't the best way to say it."

"There isn't a good way," Vanya said. "Just…this whole thing is confusing. You're confusing. I don't want you sexually, but I do because I will. Now I know that. And…I've never had to deal with this much…before."

Her train of thought was confusing, but he keyed in on that last part, wanting to know what she didn't say. "Never had to deal with this much what before?" he asked.

Vanya put her hands over her face for a moment before she groaned and put them down, looking over at him. "This is so unfair." Before he could say he wasn't trying to be unfair, she continued: "I know all about your turn-ons and I tease you and laugh at your arousal, but when it comes to myself…"

Oh, she was talking about the imbalance of power in their relationship. She had all kinds of control over him and his arousal, while he had nothing she wanted, not like that. But he thought they both accepted that that was how things were for now. "Vanya, if I didn't want you to do those things or if they upset me, I'd tell you. You're a ruthless temptress and I love you."

That made her chuckle slightly. "I love you too, Five." Then she sighed and said, "My meds all but destroyed my sex drive. I had taken them most of my life, even before I hit puberty, so I thought there was something wrong with me. It…it was hard to want to do things with men. That's probably why I couldn't find any interest unless they reminded me of you. You were the only one I wanted."

Five was a little stunned at all this information. Vanya was overwhelmed with sexual needs she'd never had to deal with before. But another thing she said bothered him. "But…you have done things with men. But you said you didn't want to…" If someone had forced her, he was about to go hunting, and nothing she could say would stop him.

Letting out a sad little laugh, Vanya said, "I didn't want them to leave me. So I just…went along with it. I had to fake almost all the orgasms. It was so difficult to cum that most of them didn't want to try that hard."

This was horrific. Five got up and climbed onto the bed, not giving her a chance to stop him from pulling her into a hug. "I'm so sorry I left you alone; that you felt like you had to do those things. If you never touch me again, Vanya, I'll still love you and be by your side for the rest of my life. You never have to do anything like that to make me stay."

She squeezed him so tight when he said that, and her love poured into him like a flash flood. It swept him away with its intensity, just like it always did. He shook and clung to her until the raging river became a calming stream. When he could breathe, he said, "You like washing me away like that."

"I can't help myself," she said. "The things you do and say…who you are…you make me overflow."

His chest was overflowing, so tight and full of love. "It's probably a good thing I can't do that; I might hurt you with the force that would come from me."

He loved the smile that got him. She said, "Are we about to get into a fight over who loves who more? Because we'll wake everyone up and destroy my room, and it's been a long night already."

"As long as you don't feel weird or…indecent, we can go to sleep. If you're still upset, I'll stay up all night until you don't feel that way." There was no way he was letting those feelings linger in her because of his jealousy and nosiness.

"I feel better," she said with a sigh. She kissed him and said, "You always make me feel better." After a moment she said, "And I have rehearsal for the benefit tomorrow afternoon. It'll be the first time seeing everyone since…"

Since the concert where she showed the world she had power. "Do you think it will go well?"

Letting out a soft snort, she said, "Well, no one is going to pick a fight with me. Some of them will probably be afraid, but we'll just play music and head home. My family loves and accepts me, so it doesn't matter if they don't."

"Exactly right. Except I don't just accept who you are, Vanya. I adore who you are. You're perfect."

It was rewarding to see her blush at his words. "Five, let's go to sleep before you can say anymore crazy things. I'm not perfect."

"For me you are. Never say otherwise, or we'll have that fight."

They parted to get under the covers, and Vanya glanced at his shirt and laughed. "If we want to talk about perfect, your shirt is it."

He was wearing a t-shirt that said: Insanity runs in my family. It practically gallops. "I couldn't pass this one up. It's a little big, but I'll grow into it."

"Yes, you will," she said as she drew him against her and pulled the covers over them. "You're going to grow into a man I'll never be able to resist."

His heart might combust from how warm and happy that made him.

(-)

As she expected, there was some wariness, especially when she first walked in. But once they started, the relaxation she felt from her love of playing her violin was shared with them, and the tense atmosphere lifted.

Between pieces, she heard Sebastian say, "There's someone watching in the audience."

Everyone's heads turned, and she spotted a small figure in the balcony. When he waved, she closed her eyes with a smile and shook her head. "That's my brother. He's pretty protective, so I bet he's here to make sure nobody disturbs us like last time."

When that got some fearful noises, she turned to look at her fellow orchestra members. "He's not the only protective one. No one is going to hurt you guys while I'm here." She loved that feeling, that she could be the protector of others. "We're an ensemble, a team united by our love of music, right?" She smiled at them, a little tentative in a way she remembered doing as her old self.

A few people smiled and several nodded in agreement. Vanya saw that Peter had stiffened and hadn't taken his eyes off the figure in the balcony. "He's, um, mellowed out a lot since you last saw him," she told the conductor. "And I was going to discuss the details of all my family's involvement after we finished." Including using her and Five's new Umbrella Academy names.

Peter cleared his throat and tore his eyes away from Five. "Yes, of course. Let's take it from the top."

Vanya made a mental note to have Five apologize to Peter later. She didn't want this to become a thing.

(-)

He didn't want to apologize, but he could also admit he overreacted. That was before Klaus's mini-intervention, before he got into the habit of giving in to his teenage hormones on a regular basis. It was definitely before Vanya habitually teased him to make him deal with his pent-up lust. Five didn't necessarily like just jacking off like some horny kid, so it was helpful that she took away his choice to abstain from it. When she touched him, it was a foregone conclusion that he would get worked up and need to take care of it.

But Five was a man. He could apologize. Vanya had told him to when he shifted onstage after rehearsal. He got a fair amount of looks, but he only had eyes for her. Though something about that Sebastian guy rubbed him the wrong way, gay or not.

He approached the conductor, Peter, and offered a hand. "I, um…I was dealing with some things the last time you saw me and…it doesn't excuse my behavior, but I'm sorry."

It said something about that first impression that Peter looked absolutely shocked at his apology. Five supposed he did act like an unhinged homicidal maniac. And, well, when he was hormonal and unsatisfied, it wasn't an unfair description.

But Peter took his hand and shook it after a moment, still looking wary. "Yes, well, I apologize if I said anything offensive about your age."

Actually, if Five remembered correctly, Peter had been repeating something that Sebastian guy said. Without effort, his eyes slid to where the man was packing his instrument. Seeming to sense his glare, Sebastian looked up and flinched when he met Five's gaze.

"Five," Vanya said warningly, an arm on his shoulder turning him away from the man and back to the conversation. Not letting him linger on the apology, she took them in a more productive direction. "All my siblings are willing to help with the benefit, although Five doesn't like crowds, so he would do backstage security. But you could advertise all of us, including my and Five's Umbrella Academy names."

"Oh?" Peter said, looking interested. "I didn't know you had those."

Vanya smiled. "We came up with them, but since we don't have missions or press conferences these days…aside from that first one, no one knows but us. But it would look good if you could advertise the whole team, right?"

"What is your name?" Peter asked.

"The White Violin," Vanya said. "And Five is The Shifter."

"The White Violin," Peter repeated. "I like it. Highly suitable. Well, the board will be pleased to hear we have all of you."

"Is the intention to have them spread around the building like security, or do you want them outside in case something does happen?" Vanya asked.

Peter's eyes slid to Five and he sighed. "The board is concerned that them attending will lead to a repeat of our last concert. So they want them to function as security."

"And keep away from your newly-repaired building," Five said, smirking. "You won't offend us by saying it; we know fighting crime gets messy. We don't like being destructive, but when the need arises, we're good at it."

Now the conductor was looking at Vanya. "And you? You said you were practicing controlling your powers…"

"She has excellent control," Five said.

Her hand ruffled his hair in platonic affection before she said, "I do. I've come a long way and…I'm more myself than I've ever been."

"It shows," Peter said, clearly approving. "All these years you've been quiet, apologetic…not displaying any notable talent. Whatever pills you were taking were overwhelming who you really are. You're much better as yourself."

Five had to fight down aggression at the way Vanya beamed at that. She'd never had that kind of outside approval or validation before. Of course she was happy. And at the end of the day, he'd be the one sleeping in her bed, so there was no threat. He just had to remind himself of that.

(-)

"You know, since we had that awkward night, we both forgot about something important," Five said when she opened her door to let him in that evening.

"What awkward night?" Vanya asked. She closed the door behind him, looking curious.

"Um, the first time I heard you…in the shower." And that incident still fueled a lot of his own private fantasies.

Vanya blushed and asked, "And what did that make us forget?"

"I owe you a backrub." Five grinned at her. "Go lay down."

It was gratifying to watch her obey him for once. She lay down on her stomach on her bed, arms crossed to make a place to rest her head. He climbed up to sit beside her (he knew better than to try and straddle her, because this was undoubtedly going to cause problems) and started gently rubbing up and down her back. She let out a pleased hum and closed her eyes.

When he started getting more forceful and focused, he drew moans from her and all kinds of noises that went straight to his dick. But he would ignore it. This wasn't about him. He wanted to make her feel good.

And he had told himself that depending on what she was wearing, he'd allow himself to ask. She was wearing a baggy shirt. "Can I push your shirt up to get to your back?" he asked. It was dangerous for a few reasons, but he couldn't pass up the opportunity.

Vanya's eyes opened and she looked back at him. "You want to take off my shirt?"

Blushing at that tantalizing thought, Five said, "No, push it up. Just the back."

After a pause, she said, "Okay," and closed her eyes again.

He wasted no time in moving the soft cotton to reveal that beautiful expanse of pale bare flesh. "You're gorgeous."

That made her tense up. "Five, if this is some plan to get me naked…"

"No!" he protested. "Just a statement of fact. It slipped out." He started rubbing that bare skin before she could say more.

Satisfaction flooded him as her responses immediately became more intense. Where before she just shifted under his touch, now her back was stretching and arching under his attention, and he even noticed her toes curling slightly.

It made him hope for something he knew he shouldn't. Vanya had admitted that she was dealing with more sexual need than she had in her life. She wasn't as touch starved as him, but she clearly loved this. And…he'd nearly cum when she'd touched him the first time. Vanya didn't need to be sexually attracted to him if he was just making her feel good in a way that wasn't overtly sexual.

The more he kept at it, the more desperate her noises got, the more sure he was that he could do it. If he could just get her worked up enough and then find the right trigger…he could make her cum. That assumed she didn't stop him, didn't leave to finish like he had.

She didn't stop him. She was shaking and moaning and whimpering and her muscles were just getting tighter. When he pressed his hand forcefully down the length of her spine, all the way until he hit the waistband of her shorts, then dragged his nails along that same path, she gasped and shook, crying out slightly as she came from his touch.

His dick was going to explode. Five had actually made her cum, and not in some second-hand way because she imagined it. No, this was real, and he'd just given her the kind of pleasure he'd wanted to since…forever, it felt like.

"I seriously can't believe you just did that," she said a little breathlessly.

"You let me," he said softly. Now he was afraid they'd get back into the kind of mindset where she felt guilty for enjoying kissing him.

"I shouldn't have," she said, confirming his fears. "I reeeeealy shouldn't have." It was said with a slight moan, though, and she stretched languidly.

"Was it good?" he asked before he could stop himself.

She opened one eye and looked at him with a small smirk. "After what just happened, you don't need to fish for compliments."

He flushed, and the fact that his shorts were painfully tight wasn't helping his thought process. "Not fishing, just…are you going to freak out about this?"

"No," she said after a moment's thought. "I don't think we should do this again, but it's hard to be upset when I feel this good."

That stroked his ego and disappointed him at the same time. He knew it was likely, that if he proved he had a way to sexually satisfy her, it would be off limits. But it couldn't stop him from doing it, and he didn't regret it.

"It's just a backrub," he said, unable to help himself from trying to do it again.

"A backrub that we now both know leads to inappropriate things."

And he couldn't help himself. "You're almost as sensitive and easy to stimulate as me."

She rolled onto her back and stared at him with narrowed eyes and a somewhat-playful smile. Her eyes flicked down before they met his again and she said, "I might…thoroughly enjoy a backrub, but it would be hard to be as easy to stimulate as you."

Blushing, he looked away. He'd reassured her it was okay to tease him, and she was right back at it. And he still loved it.

Before he could reply to that, she asked, "Do you want a backrub before we split up to get ready for bed…again?"

That drew shivers as he considered it. Right now, if he laid down on his stomach and let her touch him…it wouldn't take much. And even if he had loved seeing and making her cum, that still wasn't something she would find attractive about him. "We have some double-standards, don't we?" he asked.

"Not forever," she said. "And you can always say no."

Five didn't want to say no. But he was overstimulated and poised to thoroughly embarrass himself. "Not much…if it's more than a little…" No part of him wanted to admit that he would finish quickly without being touched directly if she was involved. It certainly wasn't something he wanted her to expect of him in the future.

The smile she gave him now was soft, kind. "Turn around, Five."

He obeyed, sitting with his back to her. "Um, don't hold me here. I…might need to leave in a hurry."

Suddenly, she was right behind him, lips next to his ear. "You leave whenever you need to. I won't stop you."

When her hands settled on his shoulders to rub them, he let out a soft moan, shaking a little, getting closer to the edge. But then something strange happened. She wasn't calming him, not really, because he was still hard, but it was the lightest of influences that brought him back from the edge. He could enjoy her grip on his shoulders and her thumbs pressing up and down the back of his neck without fear he would embarrass himself.

"How's that?" she asked.

"'Perfect' is underselling it, I think," he said with a groan.

A sudden whimper escaped him and his body tightened slightly when her teeth firmly bit into his earlobe. "I'm going to break you of using that word when it comes to me."

"No, you won't," he said, still a little breathless. Before she could take that as "challenge accepted" he added, "You piece me back together and hold me there. You might take me apart sometimes, but you never break me."

She let out a soft noise before she just hugged him from behind. Her lips pressed against his neck before she said, "I love you, Five." Before he could reply, she gently bit his neck, followed by a lick, and she added, "And I'm glad I can put you back together, because it's fun to take you apart."

Her previous efforts to calm him were gone, no hint of soothing power to be found now. She was working him up, and he would need to leave soon, because having her bite his throat, to have her so close to his vitals doing gentle violence to them…he was close. She was perfect.

Vanya was so perfect he didn't have to tell her. She could read him by now. "You leaving?"

"Yes," he said. "Need to."

"Well, make sure to knock when you come back; I need to change. If you keep coming directly in when there's a chance I'll be changing, I'll start to suspect you want to see me naked." He could feel the smirk against his neck.

"You know I want to see you naked," he said, feeling a little annoyed even as his body told him it was time to leave. "But I'm a hormonal teenager, not a perverted little creep. I respect you."

And he shifted away while she was wrapped around him, knowing it would make her crazy. Served her right for suggesting he was that kind of asshole.

(-)

When her brain and body finally settled after that wonderful explosion, Vanya got up to change. She still couldn't believe that happened. Yeah, she noticed what his touch was doing, but she admitted that she was almost as touch-starved as him, so it made sense. When it got worse…better, she pretty much assumed he'd do like she did: get her to the edge and let go. Turnabout was fair play, so she wouldn't have complained.

She really should have realized Five would take the opportunity to do what he otherwise couldn't: satisfy her. As she got undressed, she had to admit he'd done a good job. It had been so many years since someone else had made her cum. The fact that it was Five…well, if he looked different, older, there would have been immediate follow-up.

Then that phrasing had her feeling guilty: she was judging him based on his looks. Part of her saw that as really unfair. But another part saw it was perfectly reasonable that she didn't want a thirteen-year-old boy pleasuring her. It wasn't like she didn't want him because of a hunchback or acne or a certain hair-color.

Dating Five was confusing. She needed to put the limits back in place she'd had originally. It was an even higher double-standard, but it had kept things clearer. The problems had started when her sex drive emerged after a lifetime of being suppressed and didn't like being ignored anymore. Five noticed, of course, and that started conversations and blurred lines.

Pulling on a fresh set of underwear and pajamas, she firmly told herself that it might be fun to tease Five, but she needed to reel herself in a bit. And there would be no more discussing of her issues. She'd been letting her more V-like traits dominate her behavior. There was something to be said for being nice to Five, for cuddling and whispers and calm love. He deserved that gentle care. After all the trust he gave her, the free reign he gave her over his body…Five deserved soft, loving touches.

He shifted into his room, still groaning a little, and got changed. Vanya took the time to climb into bed to wait for him. And her mind went back to what he'd said before he left. Five seemed genuinely offended by her accusation. Since he seemed to take all her teasing in stride, it was something she needed to pay attention to. She should apologize.

When he was finally knocking, she said, "Come in, Five."

His head poked in first, and she smiled at him. She said, "Come to bed; you have me nice and sleepy now."

Shifting on top of the covers within a second, he climbed under them and let her pull him close to be her little spoon. When he just settled in and said nothing, Vanya said, "I'm sorry I offended you."

"Offended me?" Five sounded nearly asleep already.

To keep him from falling asleep before they were done talking, she let go of him and put some space between them. He looked over his shoulder at her, a confused look with a hint of hurt. That wasn't what she wanted.

"When I suggested you were trying to see me naked," Vanya said. "I know you're not a perverted creep."

Now he was awake and paying attention. "Don't misunderstand: I'm dying to see you naked. But I respect you and your privacy too much to contrive some plan to get your clothes off." Then he smirked. "Until I can do something with you. By that time, I'll have all kinds of ideas to get your attention."

She was blushing slightly. This was getting out of hand. "By that time, you won't need them. Let's go to sleep."

As they finally settled in, Five took her hand from where it was draped over his waist and kissed the back of it. "Can't wait until I can make you feel incredible every night for the rest of our lives. Multiple times a night."

Bright red now, she pushed calming waves into him. "But we have to wait, Five, so go to sleep."

Humming, he said, "Fine. But I can't apologize for wanting you."

"I wouldn't ask you to," Vanya said, smiling. She pressed a kiss to his cheek and settled in. "Good night, Five. I love you."

He squirmed to try and get impossibly closer to her before he said, "I love you, Vanya. And every night with you is good."

Vanya would never have imagined he could be so charming and loving. He was perfect.

(-)

Whoa, that went quicker than expected. And, as always, I fear escalation will take us into creepy territory. But it won't be a regular thing; she knows better now.

Still, serious question: should this have an M rating? Even without explicit sex scenes, I forgot that "fuck" is objectionable, so it technically belongs in that category. I just don't want people to read it expecting sex scenes and be disappointed. Those come later, in the sequel.

I'd love to hear your thoughts on that and whatever else struck you about this chapter. I have the next chapter started, but I give no promises on update speed. Well, thanks for reading!