Disclaimer: I do not own Nochnoj Dozor
WARNING: Contains slashy overtones.
Blood
More often than naught Anton ends up on his desk. Never in a good way either. Geser is a tidy man, usually. He keeps his desk clean and in order.
Thatshould tell you how important it is to him that he'll let Anton be strewn across it any number of days a week. He would do it for any one of his people really. It just feels different when it's Anton. As if everytime he tidy's up after, he's re-creating his own personal universe on his desk,complete with interjecting pieces of Anton.When Geser picks up after healing someone else it only feels like cleaning.
Usually after the adrenaline rush is over and Anton is safe once again the guilt comes. It only comes when it's Anton. It's a sad, slow sort of feeling. Heavy and crushing all at once. Accusing.
The guilt is for something too awful for Geser to ever admit to. If he ever did though, he's sure he would only be laughed at. Nobody would understand. Except maybe for Anton.
Only Anton makes Geser feel like a vampire. Blood thirsty, relishing the complete control hehas overAnton in that moment, relishing Anton's vulnerability. Always feeling as if a small nudge will send him over the edge and he'll hurt Anton in a way he can never hope to make better.All that blood and Anton's eyes. It won't leave Geser alone. It makes him feel something like hunger and something like regret.
Then again, everything about Anton always seems to be painful. Having Anton on his hands requires more consideration then the average case.
Anton on his hands.
Geser can hear a bark of laughter and knows it must be his own. Anton on his hands. Because there's sticky blood and mucus all over Geser's hands after a healing and it makes Geser want to demand that Anton be more careful.
Anton needs to learn to take better care of himself. Geser wouldn't dare try to protect him. Geser would never take that chance. He's keeping Anton's options open for him. Just in case Zavulon wins this round.