AN: Many thanks to all of you who reviewed. It's great to read your comments :)
Betaed by the wonderful Marie who puts up with my odd way of writing. Thank you!
Rodney was searching for something, moving everything that was on the desks in the science labs.
"McKay?" John's voice seemed to fill the little room, and was obviously too loud for Rodney's liking.
"God, Sheppard! You scared the hell out of me!"
"Why? You hiding something?" John started peeking around to see if the scientist was hiding something.
"I was… This is my lab!" Rodney straightened his back, realizing his hiding was only rousing suspicions.
"Yes, it is. Not sure the things on those desks are, but then again, who cares?" John didn't want to upset him too much, but wanted to remind Rodney what a bad liar he was.
"I was looking for a report. The moron forgot to file it."
"Then why were you hiding?"
"I wanted to check something." Rodney admitted.
"As I was saying…"
"I… I think I made a mistake." Rodney bowed his head and hunched his shoulders so visibly, John felt guilty for asking.
"It's okay, Rodney. We all make mistakes."
"Really? I don't think you understand, Colonel. If I make a mistake, something could blow up. People could die. It's like… like you shot one of your men instead of the enemy."
John was studying Rodney's face, trying to see if Rodney knew and this was his way of bringing it up.
"I can't make another mistake, John." He sat down and started playing with a pencil. John always thought that scientists couldn't hold their hands still. If they weren't working with something, they had to play with something, keep their fingers busy, not counting the waving of the arms while talking.
"Rodney, we all -"
"My people don't trust me anymore. They're checking my calculations! Ever since I blew up that damn solar system."
"You never mentioned it before."
"I didn't see it then."
John frowned. He knew Rodney wasn't very good at figuring out people, but he wasn't blind.
"So, when did they start acting this way?"
"Don't know… two weeks ago I suppose."
"Really?"
"Yes, Colonel. Why don't you -"
"Just a thought, but when did Carson get injured?"
Rodney froze. He hoped no one would ever mention that.
"About that time." He said in a low voice.
"So…"
"It wasn't my fault, John."
"Was it Carson's?"
"I… my calculations were correct. The chair is working fine. It has to…"
"Rodney, Zelenka said that Carson couldn't have triggered such an overload."
"I suppose… I don't know."
"Do you realize how you acted after that?"
Rodney looked up at John, puzzled: "What?"
"You went on accusing him of the accident and you didn't go to see him."
"I did!"
"Once, for two minutes. That's not how we used to do things. Everybody thought you were trying to throw responsibility. Carson was your friend."
"He's not anymore?"
"I don't know, Rodney. But you avoiding him isn't -"
"I wasn't avoiding him!"
"He was released from the infirmary two days ago! Did you talk to him? At all?"
"No."
"I hope that you'll talk to him before the briefing."
"Yeah."
They were both staring at the pencil in Rodney's hands. There were things they needed to talk about, but neither of them felt like starting the conversation.
"Is he okay?" Rodney broke the silence.
"He's… he's gonna be."
"That's good. John?"
"Yeah."
"Why did you come here?"
"I wanted to remind you that friends should be friends, regardless of the circumstances."
John always thought that no one should interfere in a relationship, no matter of the nature of it. Carson was probably Rodney's best friend and no matter what Rodney had done, Carson still considered the Canadian his best friend. He just hoped Rodney realized that in time.