The Marauder's History

Chapter 1: The Flight to "Our destination"

Setting: 12 Grimmauld place/The Order of the Phoenix

Harry; "Hermione, I've had it! They better tell me what's going on this time or I'll… I'll… I'll think of something…eventually…"

Hermione; "Just hear me Harry-

Ron (Interrupts); "Hey! That rhymes Hermione!"

Hermione; "That's just…wonderful…Ron, well, anyway, as I was saying…"

Harry; "Get on with it!"

Hermione; "Ok, It's just that, you can't simply order the Order to listen to you Harry…"

Ron (interrupts again); "Order? Order what? Oh- I want a burger!"

Harry; "Ron you really are a hopeless case…"

Ron; "Actually for your information Mr.Smarty-Wizzard, I am Not a case, I am a Human being, AND as for hopeless, I HOPE we get out of this place soon, my brain can't take it anymore!"

Hermione; "Oh thank-god, we were starting to wonder if you ever even had a brain."

Ron (Laughs evilly); "That's right, have your fun. Laugh now, but Fred and George can get a lot of firewhisky from Muddingus, so you all better hope I don't decide to become a pyromaniac arsonist… (Hums If I Only Had a Brain…)

Dun, Dun, Dun…

(Fred and George apparate into the room)

Fred; "Did someone say our names?"

Hermione; O-great you've done it now Ron, darn those extendable ears, let's just hope they don't have any ton-tongue toffees or canary creams with them…"

George; "Actually, are newest are Bald Brownies."

Ron; "Noooo, Now I even have to be afraid of Brownies? What kind of sick joke IS this?"

Harry; (Laughing Hysterically) "And what do those do?"

Fred; "It's quite simple really. They make all of your hair fall out, and it re-grows in a different color, just hopefully not puce…"

Ron; "Brilliant! What else have you guys been up to?"

George; "Well I saw Snivellus, I mean Serverus Snape, yesterday night, and I told him that he should make a sequel to the movie Grease and dedicate it to his hair…"

Ron; "Bloody-Hell, you really said that to him?"

Fred; "Well yea, and then he woke up."

Harry; "So how are those sales going at the joke shop?"

George; "They're great except-

Fred; "Except for one problem"

Hermione; "What kind of problem guys?"

George; "It's just that some kid tried on a pair of Black-Out Glasses, and he bumped into a set of out newest-

Fred; "And loudest firecrackers."

George; "Yep, and the sound surprised him so bad that he's been in a shock like coma since it happened about 3 months ago."

Fred; "But his family's been nice about it-

George; "Like, they didn't sue us or anything-

Fred; "Because we've been paying for his stay at St.Mungo's."

George; "The healers say that he'll make a full recovery though."

Harry; "O-k, that's wonderful and all, but stop, this isn't General Hospital, or E.R."

Fred; "Who are they?"

Harry; (mumbles) "Never mind, it's a muggle thing."

George; "Anyway, Does anybody want a Bertie Bott every flavor bean?"

Hermione; "How do we know that you didn't put some sort of potion or spell on them?"

Fred; "Good question-

George; "I guess it's just a risk you'll have to take… I mean, Don't you trust us?"

Hermione; (sarcastically) "Hmmm, let me think about that… NO!"

Harry; "Yea, I think I'll pass too. I don't want to wake up 3 years later with an elephants head, or bat wings."

Fred; "Hey… That only happened once…"

Before anyone could reply to Fred's slightly disturbing comment,

Mrs.Weasly yelled up the stairs; –"Dinner! Come downstairs if you want to eat today!"

Setting: Kitchen

Muddingus; "Oh Molly you're too strict, calm down a little would you."

Mrs.Weasly; "You wouldn't be the one to ask- Hey! Muddingus! Are those MORE- STOLEN, cauldrons?"

Muddinus; "Well…Ummmm, well… WELL, maybe… o-k fine, they are, so what?"

Mrs.Weasly; "It's just that ever since that stupid report of his, Percy has been watching cauldron sales more closely."

Muddingus; "Good point, that power hungry, rat of a son of yours, would probably give me up to the Ministry in a heartbeat."

Mrs.Weasly; (Enraged) "MUDDINGUS FLETCHER!"

Fred & George; "Oh Hey Dung!"

- Just then Kreature came rollerblading down the stairs noisily, and flew into the kitchen landing face first into a steaming pot of mashed potatoes; he came out screaming and looking like a much shorter, thinner, and freakier version of Santa Claus.

(In all the confusion, Harry spots Lupin and starts blurting things out)

Harry; -"Hey I miss Sirius don't you?

How's Buckbeak, is he ok?

How many days are left until 1st term?

What has the Order been up to recently?

Why doesn't anyone tell me anything anymore?

Will you adopt me?"

Lupin; Blinks (Looks around) "Uhhh, what was that last one?"

Harry; "Umm, Would you like a cup of tea?"

Lupin; "No… that's ok, I'm not thirsty right now. You look a little stressed and tired, get some sleep, and have come chocolate, it helps. Really, it helps."

Ron; "Yea Harry, let's go to bed, we'll talk more about what Vol… You-Know-Who, is planning tomorrow.

Hermione, Ron, Harry, Fred & George; "GOOD-NIGHT!"

Mrs.Weasly, Muddingus, & Lupin; "Yea- Night!"

Snape; "Die scum!... I mean see you in school…"

Setting: Upstairs Bedroom

Ron; "Harry, when did he get here? How long has he been here, WHY didn't I see him come in!"

Harry; "It's ok Ron, just go to bed…"

-When Harry and Ron came downstairs the next morning Mr.Weasly was trying to make toast with a muggle toaster, and Hermione was trying to teach him how it was done when Fawkes flew onto the plate of freshly made toast, and burst into flame- burning the toast as well. This greatly discouraged Mr.Weasly with it being his only toast triumph this morning. A minute later Fawkes was reborn from the ashes and a golden envelope glittered magically into his talons. Fawkes then gracefully flew over to Harry and dropped the envelope into his open hand…

Harry; "Wow, Dumbledore sure outdid himself this time. His note is extremely long. He mentions a lot of stuff about the conversation we had last year, and… RON, HERMIONE – Come Here Quick! Dumbledore found a way for me to bring Sirius back for a day! It's some sort of difficult and complicated potion. It has a lot of ingredients but I can keep using it as long as I have a piece of Sirius's hair each time.

Hermione; I think it's called a polyessence potion, it's a lot like the polyjuice potion, only it takes even longer to make, and we need someone willing to be Sirius for a day, and then have no recollection or memory of it at all.

Ron; "But Harry where are we gonna find a piece of Sirius's hair?"

Harry; On his pillow in his bedroom, I don't think anybody's been in there, Or in the cave he used to stay in by Hogsmeade, although that would be one of his dog hairs…"

After a week of rummaging and searching they finally found and collected all of the ingredients, all that was left was to mix them together, wait 6 months, and find a suitable person to drink the potion.

Hermione; "Well that definitely kept us busy…"

Harry; "Hey Fred, George, Ron, who's up for a game of Quidditch?"

Fred; "Hey speaking of Quidditch, have you spoke to Viktor recently Hermione.

George; "Yea, I wonder how he's doing!"

Ron; "Krum's fine."

Fred & George; "How do you know?"

Ron; "Because Vicky writes every week."

Hermione; "Shut-up Ron, I said Never to call him that!"

Fred; "Why do you care so much? You know what, don't answer that."

George; "Hey, why did the cookie go to the doctor?"

Harry; "I don't know. Why?"

George; "Because he felt Krumy/Crumy."

(Ginny finally arrives at Grimmauld place)

Ginny; "Hey everyone, what's new?"

Harry; "Not much. Where have you been all month?"

Ginny; "Oh, I was with Luna Lovegood, remember her? Well anyway, her dad took us to a Weird Sisters concert so that he could write an article for the Quibbler. They were playing with an awesome muggle rock band called Linkin Park."

Hermione; "Rubbish…"

Ron; "Ignore her; she's just in a bad mood."

Fred; "Are you sure?- because that would mean that I've never seen her in a good mood."

Ginny; "Stop teasing her! I don't know what you guys did to get her so upset, but just leave her alone.

George; Glares at Ginny (Snappy) "What? Are you her guardian angel or something? Now she has you AND Vicky…"

(Hermione stomps out of the room with Ginny in close pursuit)

Fred and George; "So what about that Quidditch game you mentioned Harry? We're up for it. Oh and before we forget, we owe you this…"

(They give Harry a brand new LightningBoltRevoltion Broom)

Harry; "Thanks guys, but you really didn't need to do that."

Fred; "Yes we did, if it wasn't for your Triwizzard winnings we wouldn't be where we are now.

George; "Yea, keep it, plus now you have an extra broom."

Harry; Here Ron, you can have my Firebolt, now you can give your old broom to Ginny.

Ron; "Wicked! Thanks Harry! Now what are we going to use for the Snitch, Quaffle, and Bludgers?"

Fred; "We have that covered, we bought a real set."

Ron; "Whoa, how much money Do you guys have anyway?"

George; (Grins) "Let's play now!"

Two Hours Later

Harry; "That's enough, let's have lunch."

Ron; "Good idea, I'm starved!"

Setting: Kitchen

Mrs.Weasly (Spots Ron); "Good Afternoon everybody. We're having escargot and fried snake for lunch today."

Ron; (Stares into space looking dumbfounded) "This has Got to be a bad dream, I'm gonna wake up Any minute now…"

Harry; (Walks over to Ron) "Don't get your hopes up. Try blinking."

Ron; "Noooo, It's worse than a Nightmare! I'm AWAKE!"

Just as Ron's Reality realization was through, a loud noise started coming from upstairs. Harry was the first to hear it and he ran into the hallway, up the stairs, and into the room next to Sirius's.

Harry; "RON YOU HAVE TO SEE THIS!"

- Ron stopped complaining about the food and ran upstairs. He opened the door to see Hedwig, Pigwidgeon, AND Buckbeak, all carrying letters for them. (Buckbeak's was the size of an average pillowcase)

Ron; (sarcastically) Jeez, I bet that went Completely un-noticed by everybody.

Harry; "Pig's got one for you, Hedwig's got Hermione's, and that huge thing Buckbeak has is for me."

Ron; "Figures…"

- Harry opened his letter to find a variety of things…

• A school list for 6th year.

• A deed to Grimmauld place.

• A check for "Everything I Have"

• Sirius's will, AND

• A thank-you/ apology note from Dumbledore.

Ron; Wait, Harry there's something else in there too… Hey is that a Prefect badge, or a Head Boy badge?

Hermione; (Walks into the room holding Crookshanks) "It's neither, it's new, it's called a Spectacular Achievements badge, nice going Harry!"

Ron; "That's completely Wicked Harry! I bet that's the best! Hermione and I probably only got school lists."

At the moment Ron stopped talking Crookshanks started attacking his leg, looking like a crazy ball of fuzz…

Hermione Came over and pulled Crookshanks off of Ron's left leg. Then she said, "Reparo" to the shredded side of his pants.

Ron winces (sarcastically); "Wow, thanks. Your dumb cat makes my leg start gushing blood and all you did was fix my pants. I wouldn't be surprised if you trained that…that…. that Cat to do that."

Harry; "Ron don't be silly."

(Hermione left the room with her letter obviously hurt/upset)

Ron looked at Crookshanks and picked "it" up. Ron then threw Crookshanks out the window…

Harry (Looks at Ron, completely shocked); "Are you insane? We're on the 2nd floor!"

Ron walks downstairs leaving Harry to his mail. When he gets downstairs he sees Hermione petting Crookshanks…

Ron; "But… How…I…It…What happened!?"

Hermione Narrows her eyes at Ron; "Something made Crookshanks fall out of a Window, it's a good thing cats Always land on their feet."

Crookshanks dashed over to Ron and starts clawing his remaining leg

Ron; "HARRY, GET ME 8 BULLETS AND A SHOTGUN!"

Harry; "WHY!"

Ron; "Because Hermione's cat just used up 1 life so it only has 8 to go!"

Ron kicked Crookshanks off his leg so fast that it flew into the kitchen table and looked extremely dizzy.

Ron; "Never mind Harry, I only need 7 now!"

Harry; (Ran downstairs) "Sorry Ron, I didn't bring a gun. But I brought an explanation. Remember when we were sitting downstairs and you were looking at that nasty food, well, didn't some fall on your pants?"

Ron; (Turns bright red) "…yea"

Hermione; (Glares at Ron Murderously) "You almost killed my cat over Fried Snake?"

Ron; "And… Because it's just plain ugly…"

Hermione; (Mumbles something and ignores Ron) 'Harry, about your mail, what did Dumbledore say in his letter, and why did Sirius leave you Grimmauld place, and "everything he has..."?

Ron; "Yea, tell us Harry! I wonder why Dumbledore is thanking you, and Sirius leaving you almost everything he has Is pretty funny."

Hermione; "Almost? You mean there was something that he left out?"

Harry; "O-k, stop with the teasing, and just let me tell you…"

Dear Harry,

There are so many things that I'd like to thank you for. One being that you put up with not knowing your family history for about 15 years, considering that it's a big part of who you are. Second of all, I'd like to tell you how truly thankful I am for helping me (And the school) all those times, at great personal risk, (The Chamber of secrets, the Sorcerers stone, Sirius & Buckbeak) you were very noble and brave, as were your friends of course. Also, I hope you re-accept my apology, being as I knew you wanted to be a prefect…

Harry lowered the letter, he didn't want to read anymore and he was starting to feel guilty.

(Just then everyone stood up as Snape yelled "Finally! We know what the Dark Lord is up to!")

In hearing this Harry ran downstairs as fast as he possibly could, causing a picture of Sirius's cousin to fall of the wall

Harry; "TELL ME! I want to know! Someone say what's going on!"

Snape (Sneered at Harry); "Nope, you're not in the Order."

It was then that Harry remembered Dumbledore's unfinished letter…

"…In being a spectacular achiever you are entitled to all the information you see fit to know, or find important…"

Harry almost leapt for joy when he showed Snape the letter excitedly

Harry; "I see Fit To Know what's going on… SO TELL ME!"

Just then Lupin burst into the room

Lupin; "It's going to have to wait until you get to school Harry, now get on your broom, we're leaving!"

Harry; "…But…Why..?"

Lupin; "Because Lucius Malfoy and a few other Death Eaters just broke out of Azkaban a few hours ago and they've been spotted over here.

C-mon lets round up a team to fly Harry to Hogwarts right away, on Dumbledore's Orders. Where's Mad-eye?"

Moody; "Right here, and Tonks too."

1 Hour Later

Lupin; "Moody we're flying so high that I can scarcely breathe."

Moody; "Just a precaution."

Lupin; "Precaution to what? Choke us to make sure we're deprived of oxygen?"

Moody; "Oh stop yer whining, that there's Hogwarts, we're almost at our destination."

Tonks; "Thank Heavens, I was starting to wonder if the air pressure up here was caving in everyone's skulls."

Lupin; "Ok Harry, we're landing. Why were you so quiet the whole trip anyway?"

Harry; "What…? O-h, I was just thinking, well wondering, if Sirius would've still been alive if I had just thought things out, or used the mirror he gave me to talk with him. It's all my fault that he's dead."

Lupin; "No, it isn't, Not at all. It's Voldemort's, Kreature's, and Belatrix's too…"

Moody; "Ok everyone cut the soap opera nonsense, we're here, and Lupin… Your socks have holes…"

Lupin; "Riiight, but since you're the only one that can see through my shoes, I don't really mind."

Hagrid came running over.

Hagrid; "Hey Lupin, Harry, Tonks, Moody, and whoever's in the invisibility cloak- oh Kingsley, hey!"

Harry; "How come nobody told Me Kingsley was here, can't I say hi to a guy once in a while without him stalking me undercover…?"

Moody; "My apologies Harry, we were in such a rush that there was no time to tell you, it was an honest mistake. I didn't know you were so touchy, and temperamental, (He leans over and whispers) but then again most guys with pink and purple boxers are…"

(The rest of the day was quite un-eventful, so I am skipping to the next day and chapter)