Disclaimer: Once more I own none of the characters used in this story, but you knew that didn't you? Duh...

Rs: Yay it's been so long! I'm such an erratic updater, I don't have a specific update day... I try to update at least once a week though.

Sasame: Yup you're horrible (yawns)

Rs: (simmering in anger) Anyways, I like to give credit to those who review, so give it up to these people!

icegirl13

animearlinefreak

Tragic Alchemy

KHStennis01

THANKS SO MUCH!

Rs: Idon't thinkI mentioned this, but "Before Your Wedding Day" is actually set two years after the original series, so this story is really set five years from the original series in which Himeno was sixteen so now she's twenty-one.

Here's a quick age chart: ( I'll explain my aging theory used for this story in a later chapter)

Hayate, Goh, Sasame, Kei:( I think they're all the same age?) 24

Himeno, Yayoi& Mayune(same age?): 21

Takako: (was at time of death) 22

Mawata: 19

Mannen: 17

Hajime: 13

Shin: 11

Kaoru & Natsue:...does it really matter? I doubt they would want to be reminded...although Kaoru is definetly a good deal older. ( In the manga anyways)

Rs: I tell you, this part took some serious thinking. I had to come an idea why Sasame wouldn't technically be like in his late thirties.

Sasame: Ewwww.

Rs: Yeah although I bet you still be pretty hot though! Say did anyone who read "Frozen Hearts" remember Dr. Gensai? LOL it's so fun to bring your stories together in some way! Alright I bet you're sick of hearing me blabber, on with the story!

Chapter 2 Soulless Eyes

Numb, incomplete, empty…there was no way to express how he felt as her last heartbeat resonated in his ears. It was as if he himself had died along with her. The ears that could hear a feather drop an ocean away had suddenly become deaf.

"Sasame-san? What do you think of this one?"

The weary young man's eyes flickered in annoyance at the photograph of an elaborately adorned casket inlaid with white satin. Flipping the picture over, he arched his eyebrow at the even more ridiculous price.

"She was extremely special…surely you'd want the best for her no?"

Sasame blinked incredulously at this profusely perspiring and balding middle-aged man before him. 'How dare he? My wife has just died and this bastard is giving me a sales pitch? Is he even human?' Still out of the corner of his eye, he noticed a framed photo of a woman along with a teenage boy and a younger girl laughing; ocean waves crashing in the background. Suddenly overwhelmed with nostalgia, Sasame's irritation melted. 'This man…is no different from me…He's only working to provide for his family…"

"You're right sir, I'll take this one." Sasame smiled desolately as he reached for his wallet.

As he exited, the young man released a weary sigh, before noticing Hayate leaning against a light pole in front of him with his hands in his pockets.

"The service is prepared for this afternoon at four." The previous wind knight mentioned offhandedly

" I really appreciate all your help Hayate. You and Himeno have been so generous towards us. I cannot thank you enough." Sasame answered gratefully.

Hayate warmly clapped his comrade and closest friend on the shoulder. " Of course…we knights don't come from normal families. We must look out for each other."

The shorter man nodded. It was true; Leafe knights weren't born into a human family with parents to raise and nurture them. Instead they only had one another.

"Would you like a ride?" Hayate asked thumbing towards the silver Mercedes behind.

"Himeno-chan made you turn your motorcycle in ne?" Sasame noted.

"Yeah…having a baby sure changes a lot." The older man ran his fingers sheepishly through his hair.

"Hai it does, demo I don't think the baby had any role in you cutting your hair." He pointed out, noticing that his friend had traded in his long, sleek locks in turn for a messy mop rather like his own.

At this statement Hayate's cheeks flushed a rosy pink. " Himeno refused to make love with me after our wedding night, saying all my hair got in the way. Your side's open." Hayate finished sliding into the driver's seat.

"And after you cut it?" Sasame smirked suggestively as he fastened his seatbelt.

"Afterwards? I think our neighbors still aren't getting any sleep." Hayate chuckled before wincing. " I do think I know why she wanted my hair short."

"Doushite?"

"So it's easier to yank when she's screaming my name in ecstasy." Hayate murmured chuckling.

"Wives…they're always trying to change something about you…" Sasame's voice trailed off as the thin veil of happiness dissipated leaving both men with the cold fact of why they had been reunited.

"Honestly Sasame…How are you?" Hayate questioned glancing over at his friend in concern.

"As well as can be expected I suppose…" He muttered, bowing his head so his light locks obscured sorrow-filled violet orbs. "You know I keep expecting to find her whenever I turn around…apologizing shyly for worrying me…It as if she's not gone until I see her…those blue lips and bloodless face, the image is a knife in my heart."

"You must have cried a lot." The driver mumbled.

His passenger shook his head. "Surprisingly…I haven't…I'm too empty. Whenever I try to let go, I find myself only holding on tighter…Well we're here. Take care Hayate and thanks for the ride. I'll see you later." Sasame finished quickly, sliding out of the car.

He was just about to slam the door when Hayate called out to him. "Sasame…"

"Hai?"

"Take care of yourself man and if you need anything at all…don't hesitate to give me a call." Azure eyes gazed worriedly at the grieving man.

He began to say something, but instead smiled softly. "Arigatou…I will." With that he shut the door and headed towards hishouse, never looking back.

Hayate watched him before starting the car and taking off. 'How long can he last? The more he tries to hold everything together, the moreit will all fall apart in the end…'

4 HOURS LATER

A heavily adorned casket lay open in the center of the church, rays of late afternoon sun casting an eerie glow. Neighbors and friends each headed towards the sarcophagus. Sasame Narimasu had no family to attend and what family Takako had…the girl died to them a long time ago.

One young woman strode slowly, her ebony gown rustling at her ankles as teal curls cascaded a few inches below her shoulders, shining in the light cast from the stained glass windows. Cerulean eyes stared ahead blankly as a faded and extremely worn letter lay clenched in porcelain hands.

Dear Mawata,

Sasame has told me that you have forgiven us. I cannot thank you enough for your compassion. I hurt you in the cruelest way possible. I deserved anything but forgiveness, yet you forgave me. I hope you will never change…for Sasame's sake. You see as Fenrir, my body sustained too much damage to live a long life as a human. Sasame does not know this, but I have at most five years left to live. When I die, Sasame will need you. You are the only other person who can completely understand him. He will pretend to be strong, yet we both know how shattered he will be inside. I beg of you…please take care of him, help him find love again…especially if I leave him with a child…the baby will need a mother to help them grow strong. I have utmost faith in you Mawata; you are far stronger than I ever was…

Arigatou,

Takako Narimasu

The day of her wedding, Takako had slipped this note into her hands, before she was to enter the church with the other bridesmaids. As soon as Mawata had finished reading, her stomach flipped as she saw the woman drift elegantly down the aisle. In the pure, untainted white dress, the woman appeared to be a celestial being; her beauty ethereal. Sasame was just as captivated she noted, peeking out of the corner of her eye. His breathing had halted in awe, his eyes entranced.

Mawata had felt a wave of nausea wash over her as a mantra pulsed through her subconscious. 'He doesn't know…he doesn't know…he doesn't know.'

She felt increasingly ill as the service dragged on. As they took their vows, her head began to feel light; especially hearing them both announce lovingly "Until death do us part." When the priest beamed and pronounced them husband and wife, saying, ""You may kiss the bride." Mawata grabbed Himeno's arm, whom stood her right as the maid of honor, to keep herself from fainting.

"Daijoubu da ka?" She whispered in concern.

"Hai. I just lost my balance." The younger girl mumbled, hastily letting go.

After the ceremony, Mawata had been unable to meet the pair's gaze. Even when Sasame had asked her to dance, she declined. He had seemed hurt, but Takako understood and tactfully changed the subject after giving Mawata a sympathetic smile.

Knowledge proved to be a curse, Mawata could no longer see the newlyweds in the same light knowing this would only be short-lived, no pun intended. Unable to bear this burden, she had gone to her parents' beseeching them to send her to school abroad. They had complied easily, certain she just needed some time to nurse her broken heart, now that the man she loved was married. If only they had known how much more tangled the web truly was.

To her surprise, Goh had followed her working several odd jobs. Although she was surprised, she had taken to seeing him often as her only friend in a foreign place. When she discovered why Goh had been following her and when he asked to her to be his girlfriend, she had eagerly accepted. Transcendent bliss overwhelmed her as she discovered that every time those crimson lips, met her's, every time those tan, muscular arms embraced her, she was able to forget Sasame and Takako…

She had never kept in touch with the couple, eager to put them behind her. Still she often had written to Himeno. The night of her high school graduation, her family arrived in all their glory, including Hayate, her new brother-in-law. It was then she received the news of Takako's pregnancy. Every memory she had worked so hard to push back suddenly engulfed her.

Ever-faithful Goh had been there, cheering louder than everyone when she made her speech as valedictorian. Just being near him gave Mawata strength and later that night she offered herself to him body and soul, praying that his caress would save her from herself. He had been gentle at first, understanding the importance of her innocence needing to be peeled away slowly. Still in the end, the knight of fire had proved to be a very passionate lover indeed. She swore her body and soul had never known such pleasure. Everything between them changed that night as she watched him pant in exhaustion, his head against her chest. As she trailed her fingers through the unruly chestnut hair streaked with crimson, it hit her. She no longer saw Goh as someone to help her forget her past, but as someone she could hand her heart over to, knowing they'd guard it with their life.

Still, now she was lost. Snapping out of her reverie, she gazed down in the casket at the source of so much of her anguish. This woman who had torn her apart in so many ways now lay before her…never to wake again.

"You were right…barely three years…" The college girl murmured.

Oh how she longed to loathe the girl for every painshe had inflicted on her. Yet if it weren't for Takako, she probably would have never learned to open up to others, nor would she have ever met Goh. If it weren't for this woman, her heart would still be surrounded by only solitude. For that, she knew she could never detest her.

Absent-mindedly, she reached down to caress the older girl's ashen cheek, remembering that Takako had only been her age when she married Sasame. Mawata wondered if the girl regretted marrying him, when she knew she was going to die so young. Did she think she could cheat death? Wouldn't Sasame have been less hurt if they hadn't been as close?

Suddenly a priest appeared beside her. "Gomen miss, demo it is time for the ceremony."

Mawata nodded cordially, heading towards where she noticed other mourners shuffling. A flash of flaxen burned, a lone flame in an ocean of black. Suddenly nervous, she darted behind an older couple, before glimpsing back at what had caught her attention. Those light locks did indeed belong to the previous knight of sound.

Sasame stood in the front, clothed in a black suit. His posture stood rigid, the once rosy lips always curled in a shy smile were drawn in a pale tight line. However, to her surprise, his eyes only misted over at most during the entire service. Himeno, Hajime, and Shin were sobbing; their innocent hearts refusing to believe anyone deserved death. Even the normally stoic Hayate and Kei had reluctantly allowed a few tears to be shed. At seventeen, Mannen felt he was too much of a man to cry and hastily brushed the occasional tear away. Mawata felt a familiar warm arm curl around her and she gazed upwards to see Goh, his eyes brimming with tears. She herself felt her vision grow blurry.Upon studying Sasame closer, she still noticed no tears, but his normally light violet eyes had darkened so they almost appeared to be black holes that would suck her in if she ventured too close to him.

As they began shoveling dirt on his love's tomb, Sasame felt his resolve slipping as he bit his lip so hard it drew blood, filling his mouth with salty bile. His fists were balled so tightly, he could swear he was scratching himself. Despite this, he couldn't cry. He didn't understand what was wrong with him. He knew there was no shame in crying, particularly when your wife has just died. Still it was as if a spring inside him was wound so tight, it couldn't release itself. All he could do was stand there, chaos swirling around inside him, searching for an outlet.

Suddenly he found himself surrounded with neighbors and friends offering their condolences along with a dish containing food. He thanked them as warmly as he could muster. Still inside he felt too exhausted, too tired to hear how sorry people were or how hard they had worked to make the food they offered him. He wanted to fall asleep to never wake again…but he couldn't that to Kyo. He had a responsibility as a parent to his son.

"Sasame-san?"

He spun around; hoping that voice belonged to the one he had matched it to. His breath hitched as he found himself face to face with the girl's heart he broke years ago. He had not seen her since his wedding.

"Mawata-san?" He asked, not sure whether he was hallucinating now too.

"Hai….ano…you've probably received enough condolences to have you on the verge of screaming…but I want you to know if you ever need me…I'll be there. The time or place doesn't matter; I'll be there... Also I brought you a few other things I'm sure you could use…other than food that is." Mawata stammered, unable to meet his gaze and instead offered him a couple of shopping bags.

He peeked inside to find the basic hygienic products: a top-notch razor, shampoo and conditioner, dishwasher soap, laundry soap, toothpaste, toilet paper, extra strong paper plates, and containers of the richest, yet easiest to prepare baby formula.

"Oh Mawata…"his voice cracked

"There's something else too," Mawata paused, before pulling out a bottle of Pepto-Bismol " Just in case 'The best miso soup in the world' doesn't agree with you." She gave a knowing smile.

"You know me too well. Arigatou…Honestly I think this is more helpful than the seven 'mind-blowing' tempuras." Sasame responded, his voice throaty with emotion. "How have you been Mawata-san? I hear you're dating Goh now."

"Hai…" Mawata mumbled, she felt embarrassed to talk about her budding relationship when his had…well been cut short.

"I'm so happy for you…come here. It's been too long." With that he wrapped his arms around the girl in a tight embrace.

Shocked, the normally composed girlhad no idea what to do, yet embrace him back. Shame branded her subconscious as his warmth surged through her, over stimulating every cell in her body with emotion. Suddenly she felt him tremble against her, as if his grief was consuming him in an uncontrollable conflagration. Still he pulled back, wearing a blank mask as if to say nothing was wrong.

A strong hand grabbed her wrist possessively. "Koneko…I see you found Sasame." Mawata glanced back to see Goh, his voice more gruff than usual.

"Goh…" She warned shaking him off, with an icy glare to match.

Certain there was no threat involving another man and his girl, Goh's voice grew lighter and in a manly demonstration of affection, he clapped his arm on his comrade's shoulder. " Gomen Sasame…It must be extremely hard, particularly… because of well you know after all that happened years ago…. Take care of yourself man…if you need anything-"

"Don't hesitate to call." Sasame finished, his mouth curling upwards slightly.

"I guess you've heard that line too much for your liking." Goh released a hearty laugh earning a smile from his company. He then turned towards Mawata. "Koneko, we have to leave now or we'll be late for your lecture in psychology."

Sasame inwardly cringed at the use of the nickname he had always used for Takako and watched as Mawata quickly pulled out a notebook pad, hastily writing her cell number, home phone number, and address.

"Here, for if you need me." She blushed ripping and handing over the paper

"Arigatou." Sasame nodded accepting the sheet, their fingers brushing slightly.

Mawata blushed even more, immediately snatching away her hand. This gesture didn't go unnoticed by her lover who urged her away gently pushing on her lower back.

"Sayonara." He called towards the knight of sound who nodded in response.

As Goh encouraged her away, Mawata glanced back, just in time to see Sasame wave. Everything about him seemed completely fine until you gazed at his eyes. Perhaps the pain they held would not be obvious to most people,but Mawata recognized them easily. After all they were the same soulless eyes that stared back at her in the mirror for the longest time after her father died.

Rs: Alright technically the family of the deceased would have a sort of a party in a sense where the neighbors came and brought food...well that's how it goes on T.V. I honestly have never had anyone close to me die...so I'm trying the best I can. As for why I didn't do the whole "party" well the chapter was dragging on ...

Sasame: No kidding.

Rs: Yeah, well I kind of wanted to move on with story. Anyways I'm curious...who do you all prefer Mawata end up with? Sasame or Goh? There will be plenty of GxM and SxM, but who should she end up with? Also how do you think Sasame will grieve based on what we know about him? All reviews are appreciated and I respond them all, but if you reviewed and haven't gotten a response, let me know! ( Plus I tend to drop a spoiler or two to those who review. )