Disclaimer. I don't own SM characters.
"Had I not seen the Sun
I could have borne the shade
But Light a newer Wilderness
My Wilderness has made-"
Setsuna was observing her Garnet Orb which was giving her images about what was happening in Earth's XXI century. She already knew that the Scouts would have met again and she had fun looking at the Inners' reaction to Haruka and Seiya's marriage. She spent some minutes staring at Agnes and Cecilia, they were absolutely adorable and she was looking forward to seeing them in person.
-Maybe I will manage to meet them before they take their degrees.- she thought sadly. Their friends haven't come to visit her for more than three years.
- They didn't forget me, they are just too busy to come here.- she said trying to persuade herself. –It's not their fault if I have to stay here, and I am sure they will come as soon as they have some spare time.-
However, these were just weak temptatives to coax herself. In the last months she has started feeling more and more depressed and some terrible ideas have come to her mind.
"The Heart asks Pleasure- first-And then- Excuse from Pain-
And then- those little Anodynes
That deaden suffering-
And then- to go to sleep-
And then- if it should be
The will of its Inquisitor
The privilege to die-"
They really deserved some peace and satisfaction in their lives, she was happy, really enthusiatic when she saw her friends' sunniness, but her dark was in need to be lightened, too. Their wishes weren't immoderate, just a visit once or twice a year.
It was the 28 of October ans she was spending another birthday alone, desperately looking for warrantble excuses for her friends' carelessness, showing her everyday mature mask while her heart was blooding.
A lonely tear crossed her cheek, and, even if she had promised herself she wouldn't ever have cried for loneliness because this was a consequence of her honorable duty, she could do nothing but weep.
Autor's note. The poems were written by Emily Dickinson.
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