Before we begin, I would like to do a shoutout to Mrs.Scott323, yes we did do a good deed. xD. Thanks for the review, and from everyone else.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Psst. Addie." Derek whispered, hoping to catch his wife's attention.
"What?" Addison shivered. "It's freezing here... if I had known we were going to jail I would of brought a sweater."
"Honey. It's August." Derek pointed out.
"Then we should of brought a thermos. Or a bottlewarmer... they don't like cold milk and that's all I got."
"You know I could always warm those up for ya..." Derek smirked.
Addison stomped on her husband's toes in disgust. "We're in freakin' court! Show some decency!"
"Owwwww" Derek cringed in pain. And she's wearing stiletto heels too he thought. "Anyways... remember those women that were spooning in the next cell?"
"Yeah and you asked if we could join in. I swear I would of killed you myself with a spork if Mel hadn't dragged you out of there."
"Well I have a spork in my pocket right now..." Derek grinned.
"Do you really want me to kick you in the nuts right now?" Addison hissed. "With 4 inch stilettos?"
"Noo." Derek replied meekly.
Kayli overhead their conversation. "You got a spork? Gimme it." she ordered.
"Why would I give it to you?" Derek demanded defiantly.
"Because." Kayli began threateningly. "Nobody can see what's going on within the Spork Squad, I can scream that you're sexually assaulting me below the waist because nobody can prove me wrong"
Derek went pale. He was obviously fearful of this chick. He handed over his spork.
"Thank you." Kayli grinned, leaned over and poked Kendel in the ribs with the spork.
Kendel sharply turned around. "What the hell was that?"
"All my dreams have come true!" Kayli announced happily, with a tint of sarcasm. "I poked dear Kendel with a spork."
"Shut up everyone!" The judge slapped his wooden hammer on its stand. "Now the members of the so-called 'Spork Squad'... are you... guilty or innocent?" His voice was low, dull and too serious.
There were murmurs among the group. Finally, Flick spoke up. "We're innocent sir, she...died on her own. Suicide, you know what I mean? Oh and by the way when you were coming in, I noticed how you walk, and I must say you have a very nice ass."
The judge raised an eyebrow skeptically. Kendel rolled her eyes and sank deep into her chair. After a moment of thought, the judge said "And why should we release you from prison?"
Kayli whispered something into Kendel's ear. "We should let us free" Kendel began "because... we have cookies." She paused. "Oh and juju. Can't forget the juju." she quickly added, looking at Addison.
"No." Crys called out. "Let the nanny out. She looks like Mary Poppins!" Coincidentally Crys was wearing her nanny outfit, and whipped out her umbrella.
"She'll sex you for free if you let us out!" Brandy grinned.
Crys slapped Brandy on the shoulder with the umbrella. "I'm not Meredith Grey! That's an insult to me and you know it."
"Oh I'm sorry... I know you're not a whore." Brandy hugged Crys apologetically.
The judge smacked his hammer down on it's stand impatiently. "Less loving, more prosecuting please? Bring the damn evidence in."
Two court employees wheeled in a sporked-up Meredith Grey in, both carried sickened expressions. Dead bodies are never fun to play with... well there's always poking a person to see if they're truly dead. Other than that... Meredith was starting to smell.
Flick couldn't help but giggle at the sight of Meredith's corpse. Chrissie and Alisa smirked, thinking how much fun it was bringing on her demise.
"Did you all do this to her?" the judge boomed loudly. "Stick sporks in her flesh and give her a penis?"
"Ahem." Kendel cleared her throat. "I was told that she always had a penis and it's not our fault she's a wannabe transsexual."
Meredith's body was brought up to the judge, who wrinkled his nose in disgust. "Get her away from me. Throw her away. Burn her. Do whatever..." He peered closer at her missile. "Are those herpes sores?"
"Indeed they are. Thank god for glow in the dark condoms." Derek grinned.
"Shut up. Let's start over. Did you, or did you not kill Meredith Grey?"
"They have plead innocent, sir." Kendel said.
"Okay, and we don't have any witnesses except for the Shepherd sextuplets, and unless somebody can teach them the English language before this girl freakin' rots, they are of no help."
"They're MY kids. Anything can be possible." Derek boasted.
The judge ignored Derek and shuffled through a stack of documents he claimed contained significant importance. "Your Chief of Surgery, Doctor Richard Webber, denies he posesses any information about this situation. He refuses to come to court, during the time of this sporking he was in surgery. I believe he is reluctant to testify against any of you."
"Of course. He loves us." Derek grinned.
The judge groaned and rolled his eyes. "Can somebody PLEASE get that man to shut up?" Two security guards, who were standing dutifully by the door, nodded and ran off. They came back with a fat roll of duct tape, tore off a generous piece and slapped it over Derek's mouth.
"Mhmmmm!" Derek tried screaming through the tape in his mouth, but it was no use.
"I think it should be Derek instead of Kayli in the psych ward..." Addison murmured to herself to no one in particular.
"Oh don't expect me to be his doctor." Rissa happened to be sitting behind Addie and overheard.
"Don't worry... I wouldn't torture you like that." Addison reassured.
"Lets move on. Apparently you have no witnesses, Meredith's body was discovered in the basement of Seattle Grace Hospital along with the Spork Squad. How secretive of you. If only you had been quieter you wouldn't have been caught." he said with a slight sneer.
Alisa broke in. "We should be rewarded sir. With a parade perhaps. Come on, you all know that we have done a good deed here!"
"So you admit to killing Meredith?"
"I didn't mean it that way."
"Come on, we ALL know you guys killed her. It's pretty obvious."
"Then why aren't you convicting us?" Chrissie asked testily.
"It would be so much easier if you all plead guilty at this moment."
"Now why would we go ahead and do a thing like that?" Mel cocked an eyebrow.
"Fine. I don't give a crap about the law. I'm going to do whatever the hell I please." the judge said snarkily as he lifted his hammer. "I sentence every member of the Spork Squad to life in prison. And the Shepherds' will have their parental rights terminated leaving their six kids in the care of rats."
Derek wiggled in his seat madly as the hammer was going down. But before it could actually hit the stand, Kendel stood up. "Stop!"
The judge stopped midair, less than 5 millimeters from the stand. "What?" he demanded, clearly annoyed at the interruption.
"You can't do that!" Kendel screamed angrily.
"I can and I will."
Kendel turned around to face the Spork Squad in frustration. Kayli had a mysterious twinkle in her left eye.
"Since you're breaking the law, we might as well too. I have a proposal." Kendel said boldly. "Well more like a bribe... but I'm sure you will enjoy it."
The judge looked at them expectedly. The members of the Spork Squad looked around each other, wondering what plan Kayli and Kendel had cooked up. And was it going to work?
"I want to give you a lap dance..." Kendel purred in a low, sexy tone.
"Everyone take off your clothes." Kayli ordered. "We're going to use them as fans... let them weave in the air and Kendy will dance." Kendel nodded. "You better give ME a lap dance when you're done with him..." Kayli muttered.
"Of course my love." Kendel replied and ripped off her stuffy lawyer outfit. She had a sexy outfit on, somehow she figured she would have a stripping emergency.
"Ooh la la!" The Spork Squad was stripped down to their underwear and cheered as they waved their course orange jail suits. "All Hail the Great Kendy!"
Kendel scowled. "You are to call me Duchess Kendel of the Hill! And she's Lady Kayli of the Logs... you are not to refer us to by anything but that."
"What?" The judge shook his head in confusion. "How did they get those names?"
"Oh. You don't want to know. Trust me." Flick grinned.
"Oh I do." The judge leaned forward in his seat.
"One word. Sex." Kayli shrugged. She found a stereo in the room, how? Who knows... according to some it magically appeared. Kayli blasted the music which set the mood for the room. Upbeat and bouncy, now if only the decorations were more appealing... screw the stands and bring in poles.
Kendel did her thing. With everyone in rhythm to her dancing, it was quite a scene. Kendel reached her final destination and perched herself on the judge's lap, much to his delight. This was more exciting than the cheap whores he hired, one of them who happened to be Meredith. Deep down inside... he was overjoyed since Meredith wasn't exactly his best whore.
Kayli whipped out a pad of matches from her shoes. "Thank god alcohol is flammable." she said as she lit one and placed it on Meredith's stomach, watching as her body engulfed in flames fueled by the tequila. "Nothing more than a pile of ashes." Kayli announced happily a few minutes later.
The judge sighed deeply and inhaled contently when Kendy was done with her fabulous dance. "Okay... all charges are dropped... invitations will be sent out for a party celebrating this event." Everyone cheered joyfully.
Kendel curled her body around the judge. "Thank you." she whispered. "I'll do another round if you send some alcohol over..."
All hail Duchess Kendel of the Hill and Lady Kayli of the Logs!
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Um yes, this is the last chapter if I forgot to mention. All the fun is gone, Meredith is dead. Brief epilogue next chapter! I have some... ahem... interesting plans for some of the characters heheh.