Chapter Two - Being Stoned

I must have sat in my car and stared at her apartment for about half an hour before I eventually plucked up the courage and got out. I knew she hadn't left yet because her jeep was parked in the drive, that meant I still had a shot… but it also meant that I had to face her, eat my words, apologise for hurting her, again, and just allowing her to walk away… and then there was the fact that I had to convince her that she was wrong about Ryan; that we weren't one of those couples that were just destined to be a couple regardless as she so poetically told Seth.

I walked slowly to her front, well only, door and I gently knocked, praying that she wouldn't answer. I was in two minds. Half of me; that half that was convinced she was right about Ryan wanted her gone, out, so I could go back to my easy life, my mansion, into the red states. The other half, the half that listened to my heart, the half that cried when I let her go, the half that ached constantly because I may never see her again wanted to just open the door and see her, kiss her, feel her body against mine.

I knocked a little louder, my heart taking control, shutting out the scared voices in my head. I heard her grumble, walk into things and swear on the other side of the door. My heart pace accelerated, the blood running through my veins so quickly, so noisily, I thought she would hear it on the other side. The door opened slowly, her eyes squinting, adjusting to the light pouring in.

"Marissa?" she asked rubbing her eyes, clearly exhausted.

"Er, hi." I smiled nervously. I could understand why she was surprised to see me, I mean it was weird; there I was standing on her door step right after the day I broke her heart.

"What are you doing here?" She moved her hand to her mouth as she yawned and blinked a few more times before staring at me.

"Sorry, I just wanted to see you before you left, I'll understand if you don't want to see me…" I trailed off, I was nervous. It was weird… I've said that.

"I don't have work until six, yet you're here at," she glanced at her watch, "eight thirty. Why are you here at eight thirty on a Monday morning?" She leaned against the door frame as she tilted her head curiously at me.

"It's Sunday..." I told her slowly, unsurely. The bonfire always takes place on a Saturday, so it has to be Sunday.

"If that's what you tell yourself to get another day out of the weekend then sure... It's Sunday." She smiled ushering me in. "Not trying to be rude or anything, its not that I don't want you here," she was talking very quickly.

I looked around the apartment and noticed the condition it was in. It was like it was before I moved in. I felt my heart drop. Did she hate me that much to change it back to what it was?

She rearranged her mess so there was room for me to sit on the sofa, "I still don't know why you're here."

"I wanted to see you before you moved back to L.A. back in with you're parents, maybe persuade you to stay." I told her simply; skipping the bullshit… there was enough of that in my life without adding to it, without skirting around the issue for ages.

"L.A? Moving? Parents?" She cocked an eyebrow at me and I couldn't help but drool on the inside. She was so hot when she did that.

"Yes. Yes. And, yes?" I felt my face scrunch up in confusion. Did she really forget what she said last night, and was just saying stuff to get out of there as soon as possible?

"Are you stoned?" she laughed, "Why the hell would I move back? I got emancipated from my parents, ages ago, in a Eliza Dushku stylee, for Christ's sake." She laughed.

What the hell? I'm beginning to think that she's the one who should be accused of being stoned.

"I know, you told me." I nodded towards her, making myself sure of what I was saying.

"No…" she sat down slowly "I didn't, I haven't even told Seth."

"Yes you did…" I said equally slowly, "on the drive to L.A to pick up your heart necklace which Jodie stole, and then we went to a tattoo parlour."

"Okay there are so many things wrong with that sentence I don't know where to begin!"

"Try." I was annoyed, she was playing the dumb blonde and it really didn't suit her.

"Jodie hasn't taken my heart necklace... how do you know about my heart necklace?" I opened my mouth to explain but she silenced me with her hand, "Never mind." She told me simply "Jodie's still here, she's leaving for L.A later and I've only been to a tattoo parlour twice, and I only remember that because of the big arsed tattoo I have on my arm and every time I pick up a crate of beer at work Homer comments about my squiggle." She pointed to the butterfly and then to the design on her lower back.

"Make that three times, as you went with me to get this," I stood up, turned around, and showed her the lower part of my back, "done." Oh my…God I missed her touch. Don't moan, don't moan, don't moan!

"Marissa, my very drunk, hallucinating friend, there's nothing there…" She removed her fingers from my lower back as I finally comprehended what she said.

"What do you mean 'there's nothing there'?"