to HEART .
Just a little karma
ONE : SHOT
by lunamaria
"Crap," She then promptly covered her mouth. She just realized that before now she had never once before cursed in her life. She let her hands drag down her face, wishing now more than ever that she were somewhere else. There was not enough caffeine in the world to keep her smiling. Listening to him was like listening to herself, which she never did. It was only now that she had realized just how annoying it really was. Every few minutes her head would nod and she would almost reach precious sleep, only to be interrupted.
"By the way, did I tell you— you're the most beautiful girl in town? That makes you the BEST!" She could tell he'd told this to countless others, and just scooted a little farther away from him, flexing his muscles. What did she care if he ate five dozen eggs a day and was "A strapping young beauty"? She'd trained herself, now, in the last hour to fall asleep to his pick up lines until he chuckled in a voice so annoying to match her own.
"Which is better: Gasphie, or Selphon?" She went silent. "Damn." And now, she realized, that for the second time in her life, she cursed- all within a two-minute period.
He drowned on, and drew out a long sigh. "Selphon."
x x x
This was the line! Talking, one thing— but singing was another!
"No one's slick as Gaston
No one's quick as Gaston
No one's neck's as incredibly thick as Gaston!"
He moved closer to Selphie so she alone could hear. "And ev'ry last inch of me's covered with hair!" She need out, and she needed out now. Not only was it bad enough that he was singing, but the whole tavern had the nerve to join in. The worse part of this all was— well, karma. She knew she deserved this sinking "Strapping young beauty" and all his vocals. But, she did think that this was passing the limit,
"When I was a lad I ate four dozen eggs
Ev'ry morning to help me get large
And now that I'm grown I eat five dozen eggs
So I'm roughly the size of a barge."
His belt went flying across his room after he broke it, from flexing. Her eyes shut half way, and another long sigh slithered out as she quietly moaned to herself, under the roar of his vocals.
x x x
As she was finally set free from him she began on her way out. Tonight had to be the only night she was ever completely quiet, and when she spoke, it was in a known human octave. Opening the exit to the cavern, the same deep & annoying voice that swallowed five dozen eggs every morning, asked.
"Selphie, which do you like best: Gasphie, or Selphon?"
She growled beneath her breath. "Selphon… See you tomorrow."
m i s c e l l a n e o u s :
okay, well first of all, this is pure crack,
& i can't be held responsible for any
injuries obtained during your read of
it- & anyhow next one shot is featured
as the "next shot" on the last shot.
so..
kthxbye!
R e a d & R e v i e w