AN: I got some feedback from some beta readers and rethought a few aspects of where I was going with this piece. I reposted the prologue and chapter one, fixing typos and making some minor changes, mostly focusing on the fact that Jason knows Clark is Superman.

I hope this chapter gives you more of a feeling for Jason's character and his relationship with Kate and with Superman. I want to stress again that I don't think this will happen at all! I think they will work things out and get their happy ending. But the idea was too interesting and tempting. I mean this as a total "what if" scenario.

Lastly, Jason's choice in music is my personal homage to Christopher Reeve and one of my favorite movies of all time, Somewhere in Time. If you haven't seen it, you don't know what you are missing!

Thanks to the betas – Hellish Red Devil and htbthomas for their suggestions and for their insight into fixing the stories problems.

This chapter has been slightly altered from it's original posting to better fit with some new ideas I've come up with while writing Being Jason White.

Chapter Two

"The Rhapsody?"

"Yes."

"It's an interesting choice."

"Interesting good or interesting bad?"

"Well, it's not a piece that's usually performed without a full orchestra behind it."

"Most of these arrangements are for a full orchestra. I guess I could dig up an etude or a nocturne. Chopin has lots of those."

"No, I think the Rachmaninov is a better choice."

I got him. I knew he would oppose my choice of the Rhapsody, but one mention of Chopin and he was ready to side with me. Professor Bolyard had some unexplainable dislike for all things Chopin. Rumor had it that he had lost a major competition playing the Polonaise.

"We have a lot of work ahead of us to get this ready for performance," he said, flipping through the score on the piano.

"I know, but it's my mother's favorite piece and I thought she'd like to hear it on a recording."

He eyed me with a mischievous grin. "So confident, are you?"

I shrugged. "I have as much chance as the next guy."

"And what have you decided for your other piece?"

I sighed, for I hadn't really made up my mind on that one. "I was thinking about one of the bird pieces by Messiaen or maybe one of the early sonatas by Scelsi."

The old instructor hummed and thought for a moment. "I think Messiaen's work contrasts better with the Rach, but Scelsi has always been a favorite of mine and he isn't as commonly played. Think about it some more and we'll start in on the Rhapsody on Thursday."

I gathered up my music and headed out of the rehearsal room, checking my cell to see if Kate had called. Her voice chimed through the phone, light and cheerful as always. "Hey, Jason. I'm working over here in the office and was hoping that you'd stop by for dinner. I'm not sure when you'll be done with your meeting, so just come by when you get a chance. I love you."

I smiled. How could I not smile? Easy…one thought of a dead man named Jor-El and my smile vanished.

My thoughts had been plagued for the last few days with the conversation I had had with my mother about Kate. It wasn't so much the things she had said about Kate that bothered me, but what she had said about…him. I hadn't stopped thinking about those damned instructions and where I fit into the picture. I wanted Kate in my life, but it worried me that I could be putting her in some kind of danger. I'd put off talking to him for a few days now, hoping I could work things out on my own, but I'd had no success. I didn't want to admit it, but I was just going to have to break down and talk to him.

But first things first. Kate. Unlike some people I know who had chosen differently, Kate would always come first for me.

The psychology building was on the other side of the campus, but I made it there in no time. Kate shared an assigned office space on the fifth floor with four other senior pre-med students. She was hunched over her desk reading and scribbling out notes when I found her. She had twisted her long, blond hair around in a lopsided bun at the base of her neck and used a pencil to hold it into place. She was so focused on her work that she didn't even hear me come in.

"Hey there, beautiful," I said, making her jump ever so slightly,

"Hey there, handsome."

I leaned over her desk to give her a quick kiss. "What are you working on tonight? Another woman who thinks she's a cat?"

She laughed at me. "No, nothing nearly that odd. Just your average ordinary schizophrenic."

"Yeah, that's real average and ordinary," I said, sitting down on one of the extra folding chairs.

"It is. Lots of people hear voices. It's a lot more common than you think. Haven't you ever heard someone tell a story about being in a dangerous situation and they say, 'Something in my head told me to run'?"

"That's more of a subconscious message than an actual voice," I argued.

"Yes, but it is a voice." She smirked at me. "It's when someone begins talking back to the voice that they start having problems."

I wondered momentarily what she would think of being able to hear voices in other buildings. She'd probably think me a freak.

"So how much longer do you think you'll be?" I asked.

She exhaled and slumped back in her chair. "I dunno. An hour maybe?" She glanced up at the clock. "I'm getting hungry so I doubt I'll last much past seven. You wanna meet me for dinner?"

"Where?"

"Masson's Deli," she said with a twinkle in her eye.

I groaned. "Kate, you know there are about a hundred other restaurants that serve chicken salad."

"Yeah, but Masson's is the best." The way she said it left no room for disagreement. "Meet me there at seven?"

"Seven it is." I got up and kissed her again, this time taking it a bit more slowly. "And then maybe we can go back to my apartment for dessert."

She laughed against my mouth. "I'm looking forward to it."

Reluctantly, I pulled away and walked to the door.

"What are you gonna do for an hour?" she asked.

Oh, I'm going to go find a secluded rooftop somewhere and ask for Superman to come and tell me I'm allowed to marry you.

That probably wouldn't go over well. "I think I'll go back over to the rehearsal room and play around with these pieces for a while."

"You and that piano," she said with a shake of her head.

I knew what she was referring to. Professor Bolyard owned a Steinway Grand that he kept in pristine condition. It was an older instrument, but it had the best tone and resonance of any piano I had ever touched. At first I was sure that I was the only one who heard the difference in the quality of sound coming from the instrument due to my sensitive hearing

, but I was soon backed up by a few other students in the department who preferred that piano over all others. At least I wasn't alone on that.

"You know, if I had enough money, I would buy that thing from him and give it to you so you would stay home more often."

"And I would gladly take it from you," I laughed at her. "So, one hour?"

She nodded. "I love you."

"I love you, too."

I headed down the stairs and out of the building with my mind still filled with the questions that had been plaguing me for the past few days. I had one hour before I would see Kate again. One hour was plenty of time. And it gave me an excuse to end the conversation if things got bad…which they normally did.

I turned around and went up the stairs to the door to the roof. I looked over my shoulder to make sure no one was around or close enough to see or hear me. A quick, hard turn of the knob was all it took for me to get the door open. I stepped out on to the roof and pulled my cell phone out from my pocket. I fidgeted with it a moment, reconsidering if this really was something I wanted to do. No, I didn't want to do it, but I didn't see any other choice.

My fingers flew over the key pad and I reluctantly held the phone up to my ear. The nervous energy in my body manifested itself in the way I was pacing back and forth without direction. My eyes focused on nothing and everything.

One ring…

Two rings…

"Hello. Clark Kent."

I swallowed upon hearing his voice. I hadn't heard it for nearly a year, disregarding a few sound bites on the television. It had been even longer since I had heard that cheesy, squeaky voice he used when he was pretending to be the Daily Planet's biggest dork.

"Hello?" he repeated when I didn't say anything.

"Um…It's…It's me," I stammered, never knowing just how to start conversations with him.

"Jason?" He sounded surprised…and he should be.

"Yeah."

He paused a moment, and I could just imagine the look on his face. "Hi," he said at last.

"Um…I had…a question." Man, I hated how stupid I always sounded when I spoke to him. It was like my brain would start to malfunction just at the very idea of speaking to him. "Um…do you have a second that you can talk to me?" I managed to ramble.

"Well, yeah, sure." I could tell that he was trying to stay chipper like Clark Kent always was.

"Now?" I asked.

"Well…Lois and Richard are working late," he explained.

That was my cue that he couldn't talk on the phone right then and there. Mom and Dad were in the room, which was never good. The fact that he had asked me long ago to keep this secret from them was probably the cause of the greatest tension between us. And the fact that I went along with it and never told my parents the truth hurt even more.

"Where are you?" he asked softly, his voice deepening into that more natural sound that made me even more nervous.

I hesitated and closed my eyes, deciding once and for all if I really wanted to tell him or not. I had thought that I could just ask him what I needed to ask over the phone and not deal with a face-to-face confrontation. But with Mom close by, that wasn't going to work. If I told him where I was, I knew he would be here in a matter of minutes. And then I'd have to see him again. Talking to him was one thing. Seeing him face to face was something else entirely.

And yet deep down I had already decided to see him, hadn't I? Why else had I come up here to the roof? I could have made my phone call from anywhere.

"Jason?" He said my name and my eyes snapped open.

"I'm on campus," I said slowly, hating myself for not being able to work this out on my own. "I'm on the roof of the psych building. Do you know which one that is?"

"Yes. Give me five minutes."

And the phone went silent. I slipped the phone back into my pocket and took a deep breath. My feet worked on their own, pacing back and forth and back and forth as my heart hammered in my chest. I cracked my knuckles nervously and looked out across the rooftops of the campus, hearing the light, unencumbered conversations of the people around me who didn't have a care in the world outside of their next exam…or the car that wouldn't start…or their boyfriend breaking up with them…or finding a new roommate, or…

"Jason?"

I spun around, startled, and found him standing only a few feet away from me dressed in that stupid outfit he insisted on wearing. Couldn't he have just stayed in his business suit? My eyes held on to his for a moment before pulling away. I hated that his eyes always looked so kind. Keeping my gaze down, I said, "I didn't want to bother you, but I just had a question."

He stepped closer to me. "Jason, you're never a bother."

My eyes snapped up to look into his face. "I'm not? Could have fooled me."

He frowned, and I felt that much braver for having called him out on his half-truth.

"What was it that you wanted?" he asked, somehow keeping his voice calm.

"Right. I should just get this over with so we can both go on with our lives."

His shoulders slumped, letting me know I was saying everything he didn't want to hear.

I turned my back to him, knowing it would be easier for me to get this out if I didn't have to look at him and that huge yellow and red emblem on his chest. "I was just wondering…about some of the things…well…you know…the crystals…"

God! How moronic was I? I should just say it and get it over with!

I huffed and turned around to look at him, screwing up my courage to say what needed to be said. "All that stuff that Jor-El says on the crystals about forming significant attachments and interfering with history and all that." I swallowed hard. "That was all meant for you, right? That doesn't have anything to do with me."

I had to give him some credit for not looking stunned that I had actually brought up the topic of Jor-El and that lonely fortress up in the Arctic. Instead, his brows knit together as he contemplated his response. Yet he chose to answer me with another question. "Why do you want to know?"

I hated it when he did that. When I was little, I would totally fall for it and end up laying all my cards out on the table before I even knew what hit me. Not this time, though. I could play this game a lot better now after years of practice. "Why does it matter? Can't you just give me a yes or a no?"

"It's not that simple, Jason." He folded his arms in front of his chest. "I believe that those instructions were meant for you just as much as they were for me."

I groaned.

"But you've chosen a different path in life," he continued. "If you had decided to use your gifts to help others the way I do and put yourself in the public eye, then I would say without a doubt those words were meant for you."

"But that's not how I live my life," I countered.

"I'm well aware of that." He did little to hide the disappointment in his voice.

I brushed it aside and said, "So then it doesn't apply to me."

"I think it still applies, you just choose to ignore it."

I gaped at him. "Look, I didn't call you tonight just so you could lay a big guilt trip on me for not wanting to be just like you. I just wanted to know if I was going to get into some sort of trouble for having a life. Is there some sick Kryptonian god that's going to exact vengeance on me for actually falling in love with someone and deciding to live a life with them? You know, like a normal life?"

He took a step closer to me. "You've met someone?"

Damn. I ALWAYS slip. "Just answer the question!" I demanded. "Can I have the life I want, or will I be punished for it?"

His face softened and he looked at me with those damn honest eyes. "You can have whatever life you want, Jason. You have the free agency to do what you like with your own life."

"Good," I turned to go.

"But then you have to be willing to live with the consequences."

I nearly growled; my fists clenched in frustration. "What the hell does that mean?"

"It means that someday you might look back on your life and realize that you had the ability to help people, to save lives and truly make a difference, and yet you opted to ignore that part of you."

The anger was really starting to boil now. "You don't think my life will make a difference? You think I have to put on some blue tights and a red cape and go bounding around the world making sure everyone's life is satisfactory except my own? That I'm supposed to sit on the sidelines and watch life going on all around me, but never really participate in it? Well, here's a news flash for you, Mister Pretend Reporter, I'm not you! And I have no desire to be you!"

"I never said you had to be me." His voice was steady, but I could tell I was getting to him.

"Then what's with the big guilt trip?"

He shook his head. "I just worry that you're not looking at things from the right perspective."

"And I suppose your perspective is the right one."

"The world's perspective is the right one."

I rolled me eyes, flinging my arms up in the air. "Oh yes! How could I forget? The world! The world is always more important than me. Everyone on this planet is more important than me."

"Jason -"

"No, you don't need to explain any further. I get it. Everyone else comes before me. You've driven that fact into my head well enough."

He closed his eyes and exhaled as if in defeat. I felt a surge of power. Countless enemies over the years have all tried to defeat him. How surprised they would be to know that all it takes to really bring him down is to point out his inadequacies as a parental figure.

But the question still remained. "So…" I said after a moment. "Regardless of what you think of my decisions, I am allowed to do what I want with my life, right?"

He looked up at me again, his face so full of sadness. "I've never tried to stop you from living the life you wanted, Jason. I only ever wanted to show you the possibilities."

"Possibilities. Like growing old all alone. Disappointing the people who care about me. Pretending that I don't have feelings."

"If that's the way you see it, Jason. I don't want to argue with you."

"Then tell me I'm free – free of the ramblings of a dead man who said my existence was an impossibility!"

He nodded. "Do what makes you happy, Jason. That's all I've ever wanted for you."

More lies. I hated the way he lied and made it sound like the truth. "Right. Happiness. If that's the case then I think it's pretty obvious what makes me happy and what makes me angry. So, I'll stick to my own life and forget the rest."

Ancient words echoed in my head. See my life though your eyes, and your life will be seen though mine…

I shook it off and turned to head back into the building, away from him.

"What's her name?" he asked softly.

My hand was on the door knob, and I turned my head slightly to look over my shoulder. "Why do you want to know?"

"So that I'll be able to thank her - if I ever meet her - for making you happy."

I hoped he never would even have the chance to meet her. But then…maybe it would show him that I'm not the only one who doesn't think so favorably about him. "Her name's Kate, but I wouldn't go looking for her if I were you."

"Why's that?"

"Because she holds you in almost as much contempt as I do."

He paused. "And what did I do to her?"

I turned around to face him one last time. "It's not what you do, but rather what you didn't do, in my case and with her."

"All right then," he said in a voice more harsh than he normally sounded. "What didn't I do?"

"When she was six, her father took her out to do some shopping for Mother's Day. When they got home, they found their house on fire with her mom and her baby sister trapped inside. She stood on the front lawn screaming and yelling for you to come and save them…but you never showed up."

His face didn't change at all. "And so she blames me for the death of her mother and sister?"

"No, she blames the fire for their death. She blames you for not helping everyone the way you say you do. Because you see, that day, while her family was dying, you were in Metropolis at the unveiling of that stupid statue of you in Central Park. You were at a party celebrating your good deeds while her mother was being burned alive."

He didn't have any comment. I didn't stick around to really give him the chance. I'm sure he would have said that he didn't know about the fire or some such nonsense, but I didn't want to hear it. I opened the door to the stairs and darted down into the building as fast as I could.