Thank you to HieiLover2004 for reading my fic

Chapter two

Confused feelings

Kurama is busy doing his school report suddenly the photo that lays on his table accidentally falls on the floor.

"Shit! Stupid clumsiness!" The Youku curses then picks up the picture frame.

The frame has a small fracture; it was where Hiei the crack can be seen. He feels sad and lonely at the same time while he gazes to the picture. How he yearns for the fire demon so much, the first time Kurama meets Hiei his very sure of himself that finally he had found the other half of his soul although he don't understand why he suddenly thought of it but the strong feeling is there, whether it was friendship or just a companion at first. He don't know yet but as time passes he was getting close to the fire demon and falling in love with him is the least he expected to happen. The only problem is he doesn't know whether his friend feels the same way or not. "Hiei…" Kurama says softly then runs his finger on the frame. The photo was taken after their tournament; it was Yusuke's idea to take some picture as a remembrance. The Youku grins when he remembers the trouble they went through just to make Hiei joins them on their picture taking. Good thing that Kurama and Yusuke still had enough strength left as they both carry the struggling fire demon to where the others stood for the picture taking. He was deep in his thought suddenly the fracture from the frame cut his finger then he places his cut finger to his mouth to suck the blood.

"Shuichi." A female voice calls him and a knock was heard from the door.

"Hai, Kaasan." Kurama stood and quickly opens the door and there stood a middle age woman with a tray of food.

"Shu chan, you're still studying?" Shiori asked as she walks pass Kurama and went to his table then places the tray of food.

"Hai, I'm just going to finish my school report for tomorrow." Kurama replies to his mother then sat on his chair to continue his school research for his report.

"O, my. Shu chan don't stress your self too much."

"Don't worry, I won't and besides I'm not forcing myself to the limit. After I'm done I'm going to bed."

"Okay, but don't stay up so late this time."

"Don't worry kaasan, I wont. Oyasuminasai." The youku said and gave his human mother a kiss on her cheek.

"Oyasuminasai, dear…"

Kurama was left by himself again he took a deep breath and put out the photo from his study table drawer to gaze again on the picture. He couldn't stop himself from running his finger on the photo, this time he was careful enough not to cut his finger once more.

It's been two months since the last time he saw his friend, and in those two months he yearned for the fire demon so much, the pain and loneliness he felt was unbearable for him. It was so difficult on his part to have this strange feelings for his friend and the very thought whether the fire demon will return it or not is a pure torture for him.

What if you had a good childhood Hiei? This question suddenly comes to his mind. And…What if you had experience the love of your mother and sister that a normal child should experience? Will you always smile? No! I maybe selfish but I want you're smile to be reserve only for me, only for me…. I'm sure you won't be that cold hearted anymore to anyone and some how you'll understand my feelings…. What am I thinking? How can I demand such a thing from you? What it would be like to be love by you Hiei? O, no! Here I go again. Dammit Kurama! Stop thinking crazy things about your best friend.

Love, a simple word yet very powerful at the same time when this sort of emotion rules you. It can make anyone weak or strong depending on the person's situation. Love, a wonderful gift from god according to ningens, because love can make you do a lot of crazy things for the person you care which gives you warmth to your heart and happiness at the same time especially if the feeling is returned …Every one has the right to be loved and to be cared for. Kurama thought sadly and hot tears begun to appear from his emerald eyes. Fate was so unfair not only to him but most of all to Hiei.

"Why should be me? It should be Hiei to experience a good life?"

He doesn't care anymore if his mother might return and see him crying, he can't hide the pain that he's been trying to ignore this past two months. He must let it all out the feelings that were bottled up inside him or else, he'll go crazy.

"Oh, Inari sama, Why I must be the one to have a good life after what I did to my past as Youku Kurama? It should be Hiei."

How strange fate can be. You'll never know what's in store for you nor understand how things happen, even how the game of life works. And if fate was not in favor for you, life can be cruel… But…What ever happens he will always be Hiei's friend and Hiei needed him like how much he needs him. Whether if he admits it or not.

He promise to himself that he will always care for the fire demon and always be his best friend…His Hiei, His fire demon… only his…What if, he don't want to be like that forever? And what if he wants something more than his friendship? Can he risk everything what they already had? It was hard for the Youku to gain the fire demon's trust at first could he risk that trust? It also takes time for him to be close to the fire demon little by little and if he gave in to his feelings it may destroy their friendship and put everything into waste.

"Please Inari sama help me… I don't want to loose him." Kurama's silent plead as he continues to sob.

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Hiei wakes up on a warm soft bed but in spite of how comfy where he was lying at, he cannot enjoy it because of the throbbing pain and dizziness his head experiences right now.

"Wha… What the? Where the hell am I?" He said to himself and tries to sit up from his bed, but failed. He was now feeling very hot but not because of his ki it was because of his fever.

"How the hell did I catch a fever? Hn, who cares?"

The fire demon carefully examines his surrounding trying to figure out where in the world he is right now, because the last thing he remembers before he lost his consciousness he was in the Makai woods and after that, after that….then what? Kso, I'm having memory problem. After a few minutesHiei suddenly recognizes the place; he was at Mokuro's palace.

"That bitch! Is she sending some one to spy on me!" Hiei was furious as he forces himself to stand, grabbing his clothes near his bed.

"Kso!" Hiei curses and tries to support himself from loosing his balance, he never felt this weak in his entire life. Still struggling to support himself as he stood suddenly the door opens and Mokuro enters.

"Where the hell are you going?" Mokuro inquires.

The fire demon pays no attention to her while he dresses up then after that grabs his katana beside his bed preparing to leave the god forsaken place.

"You're not well and could not even stand, you should stay in bed."

Hiei only grunts ignoring Mokuro completely.

"Stop being an asshole and listen to me for once! You're not going anywhere until you're fully recover, do you understand me!"

"How dare you for you to say that! Since when did you begin to sound as if you give a damn on everyone!" Hiei scorns and glares at her.

"You're my heir, so, it is my right to make sure that you're in good condition at all cost!" Mokuro snaps then her ki begun to rise into a dangerous level.

"I'm your heir, right? You said it yourself, so I should be out there doing my training not just lying on this damn fucking bed!" Hiei shot back and make his way to the door, but before he could even reach to where the exit was Mokuro grabs him and slams Hiei on the wall.

"If you're going to be my heir, you should follow my orders and you should discipline your self!"

"Let me go!"

Hiei's P.O.V

I tried to struggle on her iron grip which is getting tighter that I find it difficult to breathe. For the first time in my life I had never felt this helpless and weak.

I don't know what she was thinking as we both glaring from each other. But for some reason I had a weird feeling that she feels sorry for me because at my state right now. Maybe I'm getting paranoid already to think that everyone pities me and I've hated it. Dammit! How I've hated this weird feeling, it's like it made me a very weak person. Because of this damn emotion. Wait a minute when did I start to feel this way? That I longed for some one to care for me? Suddenly he thought of his friend. Kurama…fuck you for making me feel this weak! How dare you break down my walls that I built inside my hearth for so many years so that no one will easily get through me? Damn you Kitsune!

End of Hiei's P.O.V

"What's wrong with you! Stupid bastard!" She snaps at the helpless fire demon then slams Hiei again on the wall.

"Just…just mind your fucking business!" Hiei retorted.

For a moment there's a silence between the two, although her grasp loosen quite a bit, she still held Hiei against the wall. Eye's still locks up as if they were having a glaring contest.

"So, I see…does the fire demon got tired of living like hell?" Mokuro mocks.

"Shut up! You bitch! Just shut the hell up!" Hiei says in hatred and quickly avoids her intense gaze.

Hiei was surprise when finally Mokuro releases him, some how he don't understand her sudden action, and her ki level becomes so calm again when not so long ago Hiei could feel her rage that she would kill at any moment. Why doesn't she kill me instead? His hate on the bionic bitch intensifies only. Does she know that she'll do me a great favor if she kills me instead? Damn you! You bitch! Whatever her reasons, I don't like it she should kill me instead of letting me live and continues to be torture by my stupid emotion. Hiei seems so upset; suddenly he felt her warm breath against his ear and she whispers something.

"You're no longer my heir, until you decided to come into your senses and make a decision what you really wanted in your fucking life! I don't want to see your fucking face in my territory! Got that!"

Hiei was stun when she said this word to him. He did not know how to re-act nor what to feel, all Hiei did was stood frozen as her last words tries to sink into his brain, finally Mokuro removes her tight grip.

"You make me sick! Hiei, don't you know that!"

With that final word Mokuro turns her back on him and left.

"Wha…what is this I'm feeling? I should get used of being rejected by every one. After all everybody hated me, that's why I'm thrown away when I was a child."

Slowly, Hiei falls down on the floor and hugs himself like a helpless child. Even the most cruel and merciless bitch all over Makai has rejected him, thrown him just like that. He hugs his knees and stares blankly at the door. He could not still believe to himself that all this damn things happens.

Shedding tears never crosses his mind, never ever in his whole life he will cry for anyone not even for that bionic bitch. That's how stubborn he is, cold hearted and his pride for acting like he couldn't care any less for anybody at all. Maybe that's the reason why everybody hated him so much. Suddenly Hiei begins to laugh, first it was just himself who can hear his own laughter but after a while his laughter became louder that it can now be heard all over the place. He laughs like a madman or an insane person. Hiei laughs as if this is the last time he will ever laugh and that there will be no tomorrow.

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Characters from YYH don't belong to me, I just borrowed them to have this story.