A/N: Okay I wanted to try my hand at something other the FF7. And I've been reading a lot of Weiss Kreuz, especially the angsty ones... I'm not good with this kind of genre so tell me what you think.

Warning: Yaoi,attempt suicide, and most likely OOC

Disclaimer: Don't own!

I can't take it anymore. It's not like he ever cared, so why should I? The problem is, I do, I do care. I care about everything that has to do with him. No one ever notices but I do. I cared when he stopped eating for a week when his sister was taken. I cared when he came down with the flu. It completely tears me apart when he gets hurt, even in the smallest ways. But as I said before, he doesn't care. The only thing on his mind is his sister.

I don't remember when I started doing this. Using my own weapon to draw long thin lines on my flesh, cutting myself deep enough to let me feel some other form of pain then the one I feel when around him.

I watch the blood run down my arms, today I have cut both because today was an exceptionally cruel day for me.

I had just entered the kitchen to grab a cup of coffee; I had been out late the night before drinking. Everyone thought I spent time with women on those nights, but I usually just drank myself to a coma. The bar tender, a really good friend of mine, always brought me home but never farther then the front porch where he would leave me for the others to find. I don't blame him; he only gets a certain amount of time on his breaks. Well as I entered the kitchen I noticed Omi and him in a heated discussion, it took a couple of seconds for them to even notice me, but when they did I sorely wish they hadn't.

He glared at me coldly, even more so then usual. Omi quickly left the room to let what ever was going to happen to happen. It was silent for a few seconds, in which I tried to take the time to settle my stomach down. I felt like I was going to throw up. I've never seen him like this at least not directed at me. This look he gave me he saved for the man who put his sister in the coma.

I tried to smile but it just came out a nervous twitch on my lips.

Right after that he started yelling at me, but not at the same time. He was to good to actually yell at me, which just brought me down that much more.

He told me that I was endangering the team with my outings. He kept on this for a while, the whole time I said nothing just looked at the floor hoping it would swallow me up. But unfortunately after tiring from that topic it seemed he was still pissed and took my lack of reaction as that of my not caring.

Whore he called me, along with other words that I just don't want to remember.

What I did next I will forever, even in death, wish I hadn't done.

I became defensive when he started to talk about my life style, or what he thought it was, and snapped. I don't remember exactly what I said, but it was about his sister, something really cold that he didn't deserve. At that moment he punched me, I think I chipped a tooth at that. He didn't let off with just one punch either. I don't know how many times he hit me, but it wasn't until Omi and Ken burst into the room to drag him off of me that I realized what had happened.

I refused any help from Omi and Ken, and didn't look at Aya as I stood up and walked back to my room.

I sat in there for a long time, sitting on the floor leaning against my bed, tears staining my bruised cheeks.

I barely answered the worried calls of Omi and Ken, just saying I would be fine. I ignored the calm knock of Aya completely. Not wanting to talk to him, not blaming him for anything. But I was afraid of what would happen if I did answer.

After some time, I don't know how long, I took out my wire and circled it around both wrists a few times, not even bothering to roll up my sleeves. I stared at it for a few seconds before slowly pulling the wire with my teeth. I felt the stinging pain after the wire cut through the fabric of my shirt. Soon after blood slowly stained my white shirt and dripped down my hands and onto the floor. I don't know how deep I cut myself this time, probably deep enough to do some damage if not kill myself if I didn't do something.

How long I was there, I don't know, but I saw the blackness start to take over my vision. I barely heard the door burst open, but at that point I didn't care. I only had wished they waited until I at least was fully unconscious.

Well it didn't matter too much because I lost consciousness right before hitting the floor.

When I finally woke up I didn't know where I was, I know it wasn't my room. This room was clean, not a thing was out of place. I wonder how long I was out for. A soft reply from somewhere in the room told me I was out for five days.

I recognized the voice and looked over to see Aya sitting on a chair next to the window.

Slowly sitting up I realized I was in his room, I softly asked why I was here instead of a hospital or at least my room. I watched him, taking note the elegance of his features, even the wariness of his form didn't escape my notice.

He didn't answer, instead asked his own question, asking me why I did it. He told me he saw old scares so knew it had been happening for a while. I looked away, I didn't want to answer. What would I say, yeah I did it because you hate me? I could never do that, so I didn't answer, just looked away.

I didn't notice his movement until he sat next to me on the bed. I still refused to look at him. He gently grabbed my hand and asked again. I didn't like the closeness, it made me nervous. But he didn't notice, just sat there waiting for my answer. I yanked my arm away, still not looking at him, and snapped that he didn't care about some stupid whore so there was no point in his asking.

I went into shock, I think, when I felt him wrap his arms around me. He whispered that he did care. My mind went blank as I looked at him. Why was he hugging me? He doesn't care about me. This makes no sense.

It took some time before I slowly pushed him away, I had to know why he was doing this. I asked, and he seemed hesitant before answering me.

What he told me was surprising, he told me that he always cared about me. That next to his sister there was only me in his heart. He told me that he always was jealous when I went to the bar, and came back smelling like the women I was with. He told me all these things and more.

After he was done confessing, I smiled and hugged him. Tears once again where falling down my cheeks as I confessed my feelings to him.

After some time we pulled apart and he stood up. He told me to rest so I could get better, he was going to go grab something for me to eat.

As he left I settled down and thought about me actions of the past few months. Noting that we had a lot of catching up to do…

End

A/N: Okay I think I rushed the ending... Tell me what you think! Oh and I've never actually watched the series so these characters are based on what little knowledge I have of them from reading Fics. please review!