Shizune "Dian Cecht" had promised her brother that she would take care of his fiancee after he died. While said fiancee was far more powerful than Shizune could ever hope to be, in fact one legendary deed away from claiming her domain in the Overworld, she held to her promise.

It wasn't nearly as silly as it had seemed at first. Tsunade "Ganesha" Deva needed taking care of; she needed someone to bring her back to her room when she was drunk, to carry around whatever money she planned to gamble away this time, to keep track of just how badly she was screwing up her finances, and finally to follow up on any rumors about the Hindu Gods not wanting to sire children anymore so that they could keep sort-of pretending that they were on an important mission.

She also needed someone to tell her she was making a stupid decision. Shizune, thus far, had proved unable to do so, at least in a way that actually convinced Tsunade to change any of her decisions, but today she really needed to do so.

The Deva's old friend Orochimaru was there to make a deal, and she seriously seemed to be considering it in spite of knowing all about the crimes that got not only him but three quarters of Clan Aztlanti expelled from the Village. Tsunade was also not exploiting Orochimaru's apparently weakened state at all.

"So you can see," the former Aztlanti Clan Head hissed like a snake, "I need a cure, the kind that the Health Purview can't provide. I need something that can defy the edicts of the universe. That can help me…escape the prison of Samsara."

Tsunade cocked her head to the side. "And you think that the Samsara Purview can help because…?"

"Samsara is all about defying Fate, and freeing yourself from the eternal cycle of life," Orochimaru responded. "I have some theories about how its powers could be combined with the Health Purview to make some true miracles happen, but to really test I need some people who are still alive that can use it. The dead are too weak with it, unfortunately."

Both Tsunade and Shizune were confused by that statement, but said nothing.

"To my knowledge, 'knows how to use Samsara at an above-average level' and 'still alive' is a set that, accounting for the entire population of the Middle-World, includes, well, you and Danzo, and I've burned the latter bridge, I'm afraid."

"You burned the former as well," Tsunade sneered.

"You wouldn't be talking to me if that were the case," Orochimaru answered with a sly grin.

"Let's say I wanted to help you," Tsunade answered, causing Shizune's face to rise in fear. "Let's say that I could help you. Let's say that this conversation doesn't end with me beating you into a pulp and tying you up for whatever hunters the Village Hidden in Legends has looking for Rogues. What do you think you said that ends in that result? I'd like to hear it quickly. I don't want my time wasted."

Orochimaru cocked his head, that sly grin never leaving his face. "I can bring them back."

Tsunade shook her head. "Not good enough. Dealing with wraiths is worse than never seeing them again, and zombies are even worse than that."

"I don't mean as wraiths or zombies. I mean as themselves."

"That's impossible!" Tsunade responded, slamming a fist into a nearby wall and accidentally forming a hole with her Strength Knacks. "The long-dead are dead. Scions don't become Mummies, or Vampires, or Kue-Jin, they stay dead. I don't think I'd want any of those options anyway."

Orochimaru shook his head. "You're completely misunderstanding me. I'm not talking about undeath. I'm talking about resurrections. Bringing them back to life as Scions, with all the powers and connection to the Gods they once shared."

"Again, you're promising the impossible."

Orochimaru started to chuckle. "Osiris once granted the Spell of Life to the Village Hidden in Hekau's mortal priests. It let them bring souls back from the dead, more or less, and yes I already know that you said you weren't interested in seeing them as Mummies. I, not inclined to just accept what the Gods said the Spell could do at face value, have looked over the Spell of Life and come to the conclusion that it can be perfected, used to truly restore others' health. Alas, the power of the Gods requires a God, and I seem to have lost that status thanks to a fight with a particularly dangerous individual, so I can't help you out now."

Shizune prayed to every Deva and Tuatha da Danaan in the Overworld that Tsunade called him on his obvious bluff and walked away, if not taking him down for the criminal he was. Unfortunately, Tsunade was always her own woman, and answered with no regard to Shizune's wishes.

"I have this great magical gift, but I can't prove it at this very instant. You know how much of a scam this sounds like, right?". Still not walking away for reasons that Shizune couldn't discern, Tsunade unfortunately continued, "prove it to me. Convince me beyond all reasonable doubt that you can actually pull this off, and I'll deal with your offer."

Shizune shocked herself with the fact that she hadn't pulled all of her hair out long ago. She just might today. "Lady Tsunade, you cannot seriously be considering this!"

"Quiet, Shizune, I'm-"

"No, I will not be quiet! Lady Tsunade, regardless of how we might live, we are not Rogues! We are still Scions of the Village Hidden in Legends! But if you do this, if you cross this line, then we will be traitors. Is this a line you want to cross?"

Tsunade glared at her, saying nothing. The entire meeting became eerily quiet after Shizune's outburst.

Eventually, Orochimaru's grin turned into a full smile as he elaborated, "I will have your proof out in the fields a ways from this town. Show up in three days, and we can discuss whether you really do want to cross that line or not."

Orochimaru drew an obsidian dagger and dragged its edge along various spots on his skin, not hurting himself but pantomiming…the wounds that had killed her fiancee. "I think we can come to an understanding," he said before leaping away, a good thing as Tsunade punched in his direction, demolishing the wall that was just behind her old bandmate.

"You're not actually doing it, right?" Shizune begged.

Tsunade stared at where Orochimaru just was, thought on his words and actions, and then sighed. "I need a drink," was her only response.

--

"Purge it to the coldest depths of the Underworld! Have the shikome rip it apart with their teeth! Ensure that Izanami hates it more than she hated her husband for betraying her! Banish it into the deepest, darkest pits-"

"It still won't be turned correctly," Sakura pointed out. "But it's nice to know that you know your mother's stories. I'm a little surprised, actually."

Naruto, resisting the urge to throw the thrice-damned hourglass at her face, instead reset it to try again in another hour. Not that he felt it would be better that time.

"Don't you just have to turn it at exactly 20 minutes?" Sakura wondered when he didn't respond to her barbs. "That way you can turn its three times in an hour."

"I tried that already!" Naruto snapped, surprising her once more. "There's not enough sand to last for 20 minutes; the whole thing is done just a bit before."

Sakura bit her lip, pondering the puzzle more for a lack of anything else to do than genuine interest. "That's impossible then, isn't it? If it takes less than twenty minutes for the glass to empty, then even spacing things out, the last turn would have to be a few minutes before your hour is up."

Naruto had taken quite a while after figuring out how long it actually took for the sand to fall to come to that exact conclusion, so he was a bit jealous at Sakura instantly noticing the problem, but out loud he merely said, "yeah, I noticed that too."

Continuing to ponder the matter, she continued, "but Jiraiya wouldn't give you the task if it were impossible, would he?"

Neither of them, thinking on the man in question's behavior, could honestly say that he wouldn't, but Naruto needed to have faith for his own sanity's sake. Not actually coming up with an answer, he shook the hourglass a little more in frustration, not caring how it fell now that it was lost for the hour anyway, until he noticed that he got a bit of the sand to leap up when he did so.

"Hey, I'm not allowed to turn it on its side, but he didn't say anything about shaking it. Maybe if I toss it around a bit, the sand will take slightly longer to get down, and I can time it to twenty minutes exactly."

Sakura looked skeptical. "You have no way of predicting how long the spattered sand will change the time for."

"A normal person wouldn't, no, but I'm a future master of the Stars Purview! Understanding time is how we work!"

Sakura looked even more skeptical, but sat back to watch him. Two hours later, he grinned in triumph when he made two distinct turns at the right moment, but then screamed even more demands about what horrors from the Japanese Underworld this thing could suffer when he failed to turn and it glowed one minute before the hour was up, but it was clear that he was on the right track. He just needed to time it.

Sakura looked on in amazement, then thought about herself. Should she be trying to learn the Stars Purview right now? Jiraiya had said it wasn't impossible, but would probably be more difficult for her than Naruto since she had only practiced Purviews Associated with her Birthright before and didn't have the influence of a Titan Lord affecting her. Also, though she knew it was a little bit immature, she didn't want to just copy Naruto. She wanted to fill her own niche.

Did that mean extending her skills? It occurred to her that she hadn't put much thought into the matter. Outside of learning Arete, she had mostly focused on the abilities she had awakened upon her Visitation (Health, Justice, Intelligence Knacks, Wits Knacks), and while she had been improving them and learning new Boons, she wasn't certain whether or not to diversify. War was also associated with Athena, and it was something that neither Naruto nor Sasuke knew, or she could take a less direct page from Naruto's book and learn Animal, maybe Animal (owl) to connect further with her Divine Mother, or…she needed a teacher who would work with her on this.

Guide Kakashi was fine when he wasn't using them as toys, but his skills didn't translate to hers so well, and she wanted someone who could really focus on improving her abilities. Something like what Naruto had with Jiraiya, though she really hoped that whoever it was didn't share any of the Yazata Scion's character traits. But where was she going to find that?

--

As the day neared its end and they approached the town where this 'Tsunade' woman presumably was, Naruto triumphantly showed off the fact that he had managed from noon to now following the rules without it glowing once, and that he could easily pass Jiaraiya's test by tomorrow. When said Minor God ran a hand through Naruto's hair and congratulated him before hinting at a much more difficult second half to to the puzzle, Sakura was reminded of her earlier musings and wondered where she should start looking if she wanted to get better. She supposed that now was as good a time as any.

"What is this Tsunade like, beyond just getting drunk and gambling? I mean, I've read about her in the history books, but they only praise her accomplishments. Is she…like you?"

Jiraiya looked at her in apparent horror for a second, glancing back and forth at something, before bursting into laughter. "Well, let's just say that she's the type of woman whom you would never want hearing you say that. Out of all the dangers I've faced in my life, none quite came close to the time she caught me peeping on her in the shower. Her wrath could level cities. I'm not exaggerating; there used to be a small city in the Land of Blood that the Vampires used as an outpost to keep watch on the Land of Heroes. Then one of those Vampires killed her boyfriend, and…well, the city no longer exists, let's just put it that way."

Sakura remembered that lesson. She had always suspected that the story was expanded over time. Jiraiya's voice brooked no argument as to it having happened as he described it.

Continuing, he went on, "she's brilliant, like most Minor Gods, and I doubt there was ever a Scion who walked the Middle-World with half the knowledge of the Health Purview she had. She invented a whole new way to use it to enhance her also impressive Strength Knacks, and with her elephant companions and mastery of Samsara as well, well, she was not someone you wanted on your bad side."

His mood turned contemplative as he looked to the side once more, as if afraid someone was listening. "However, it's not that difficult to get on her good side once you know her. Just get her some good booze. Or recommend some solid gaming places, the type where cards and dice are thrown. And always note how young and beautiful she is. She was actually in her fifties before immortality really sunk in, but she looks much younger. A lot of Ichor was invested into her appearance, more than was practical actually, but she never found it a waste. Tsunade's the type to care about those things."

Sakura was trying not to judge, as she cared about her own appearance a little more than was probably healthy, but still it sounded like all of the Sankami couldn't help but be slaves to their vices. Weren't Gods supposed to be better than this? Weren't they ideals to look up to?

"So this person who's gonna be Great Kunitsokami really is just some old grandma?" Naruto shouted in surprise.

"That's your takeaway, really? After hearing our great Sage Jiraiya astound us with tales about how this woman also rejects his philosophy on the temptations that all Supernatural should avoid. I guess we should be thankful that she's not another perv."

Jiraiya's face darkened. "Judge me all you want, but don't condemn her before you know her. You Lesser Heroes may think you've seen the world, been on a dangerous mission or two, but you haven't seen what we've seen. You don't know what this Village, what this whole world, does to people as it chews them up and spits them out." He took on cheery tone before they could respond. "But let's make sure you and your friend Sasuke live long enough to see it for yourself! Don't thank me, it might be the worst thing I've ever done for you!"

--

For as small as the town she was visiting currently was, it had a lot of alcohol for sale. Tsunade guessed that the locals didn't have much else to do.

Therefore, it probably was Fate that ensured she choose the same bar that Jiraiya happened to stop at. Seeing the overgrown mass of white hair, she sighed and thanked herself from several minutes ago for realizing how necessary alcohol would be in her current situation. Both of her fellow bandmates wanted to talk. What a wonderful reunion.

"Hey! Tsunade! It's been a while!" Jiraiya called out to her just as she was contemplating how best to hide herself from him.

"What? That's the drunk old loser grandma you told us about?" One of the younger Scions he had with him shouted upon seeing her.

A vein grew on her forehead just as her old Bandmate gaped in terror. This place has cheap beer. You like cheap beer. You don't want to destroy the place that gives you cheap beer, she reminded herself before she ended up smashing the restaurant surrounding the boy into smithereens and taught the punk a few manners. Instead, she called out to a waiter and asked for three bottles of their heaviest stuff.

"So, Jiraiya, to what do I owe the…" she almost said 'pleasure,' but couldn't bring herself to pretend that was remotely close to an accurate description, "reunion."

She took a gulp of something that would have knocked out a weaker mortal man before listening to his response.

"Guide Sarutobi is dead," he answered.

"I heard," she responded, "and I mourned for him, just as I've mourned for everyone I've lost. It's a pretty long list, as you well know. I don't need you to come out here and tell me all about it."

Jiraiya looked uncomfortable as he continued. "As you also know, this means that the Village needs a new Great God-on-Earth, and…"

"By the cold depths of the Underworld, no," she answered.

"They'll go with Danzo if it's not you," he tried to reason with her.

To his credit, she did in fact pause in thought at the prospect, but shook her head.

"That psycho can only do so much. Besides, it might be better for someone like him to take the position. It's cursed, and maybe it's about time that that curse fell on someone who deserves it."

"Tsunade…".

"No, Jiraiya, only an imbecile would want that damn seat, and I'm tired of listening to them."

"Hey!" The short little Scion Jiraiya had brought with him interjected. "I'm going to be Great Kunitsokami one day, so don't call everyone who wants it an idiot!"

She glared at him. "I rest my case."

Sakura suppressed a smirk. She was right in that Naruto's interest in the position absolutely did not act as proof against the idea that it was desired by idiots, but she also really did not like the woman's attitude. In fact, she found herself completely agreeing with Naruto's next assessment of the situation.

"Why in the cold depths of the Underworld do we even want her, Pervy Sage? The Great Kunitsokami is supposed to look out for the Village, when she clearly doesn't care. I don't know this Danzo, but maybe he…"

"Naruto, Danzo is an awful person, trust me," Jiraiya tried to shut the boy down before he could cause irreparable damage to the cause.

Tsunade snorted. "Yeah, don't you dare try to put us on an equal level. He's ruthless, he's horrible, he…"

"Stayed," Sakura interjected. "He never abandoned the Village to get drunk on a false mission."

Jiraiya stared at her in horror, while Naruto gave her a thumbs up and Tsunade's expression was unreadable.

Eventually, she looked her former bandmate in the eye and simply said, "Jiraiya, did you bring these two here so that you could have the leverage of two murdered Heroes on my record to coerce me?"

Naruto did not respond to the threat the way she wanted him to. "Like an old hag like you could even try! What, are you going to cry about it while losing another dice game…" he did not see the two fingers that struck into him, nor did he feel them for long enough to take note before he flew straight through the wall of the bar.

As he stood up, trying to pull out the splinters, Tsunade walked out to glare at him, ignoring the distressed bartender desperate to know who was going to pay for the damages.

He glared right back, shouting, "I'm going to be the Great Kunitsokami, because I care about the Village, because I never give up, because I am a true Hero, in the original meaning of the word, not just the rank!"

Tsunade remembered the last person to tell her that. And the person before that. "Telling you I believed in your dreams and encouraging you to reach for them would be the cruelest act I could possibly perform, kid. Nothing but misery awaits you if you try. Trust me, I've seen plenty of bubbly idealists, all just as enthusiastic as you, try for that seat, and all they got was a quick and early journey to the Underworld for their troubles. Well, the lucky ones got a quick journey, anyway."

"Maybe you've given up, but I'm not a coward like you!" He charged at her, determined to prove her wrong by overpowering her, which led to her effortlessly flicking him and sending him tumbling back several yards.

"The bravery of an idiot is worthless," she answered.

He charged again, this time seeing her prep her fists and shouting "Stars Purview: Perfect Timing," which failed utterly as it didn't even activate, nonetheless keep him from being slammed back to the exact same spot on the dirt he just left.

"Do you even know the Stars Purview?" She demanded, laughing at how pathetic the attempt had been. There was no mirth in her laugh, nor even cruel enjoyment. It was clearly meant to make him angry. It worked.

"I started earlier this week," he proudly shouted.

This caused her laughter to be a bit more genuine as she effortlessly sent him flying backward again. "It takes far longer than that to get even a Lesser Hero-level Boon that you aren't Associated with nor have a Birthright for down, and Stars is weirdly complicated. There's no way in any of the Three Worlds that you could use a single Stars Boon in real combat by now."

"I'll have two Boons by the end of the week!" He shouted back.

She was so amused by this boy, so utterly entertained and disgusted at the same time, that she thought of a way to address his ideals directly using her own. "Then let's make a bet. If you actually can master two Boons from the Stars Purview this week, then I'll go back to the Village. I'll take the position, and I'll admit that you were right about me. That you were right about how important the Great God-on-Earth is."

Naruto glared at her, clearly intrigued. "And you'll heal Sasuke?"

"I'll look over whoever that it as soon as I can, yes," she answered before continuing. "But if you can't, you'll give up on this dream. You will swear, on your honor as a Scion, that you will stop trying to be the Great God-on-Earth, in whatever language you want to describe that job. If you want this settled, those are my terms."

Naruto balked. He would never admit it later, but he did. As someone who place genuine value on not going back on his word, he couldn't just make an empty promise to get this Tsunade woman to go along with them. Somehow, she knew it too. If he took her bet and failed, he really would be abandoning his dream.

Could he really master the Stars Purview in such a short time, considering how long it had taken him to figure out the first part of the first Boon? She smirked at his brief hesitation, and that sealed it. Of course he could. He was Naruto "Izanami," the future Great Kunitsokami, and he could face anything that got in his way, believe it!

"I swear that I will master two Boons from the Stars Purview by the end of the week, or I, Naruto, Scion of Izanami, will never strive to become Great Kunitsokami."

Sakura, having made her way through the wreckage, stared him forlornly. "Naruto, are you sure-" before she could finish, he continued.

"However, that won't happen, because I will show you what someone who hasn't given is capable of. And when those Boons are mastered, then you will heal Sasuke, then you will return to the Village, and you will show the position of Great Kunitsokami the respect it deserves."

Tsunade was taken aback. It wasn't that he was actually stupid enough to take the bet, even as sincerely as she felt he was, nor even the speech about how he was totally going to do it. Those were somewhat expected.

It was, instead, how much he resembled her half-brother, that little son of Lakshmi's who was always so full of joy, so full of excitement about what the future would bring. Something about his bearing was identical to Naruto's.

Which only reaffirmed that this kid was doomed to the same fate that he had been. Dying, cold and forgotten in a pointless mission for a stupid war, never seeing a fraction of those dreams realized. His failure here would be the kindest thing she could do to him, no matter how blind he was to the fact.

"You have three days. Show me what you've got."

--

Kabuto, back during the invasion of Legends, had finally fully committed to Orochimaru's cause. A part of him regretted that now. Looking upon his master's weakened form, he was fairly certain that the two would prove evenly matched in a fight. He could take over Clan Aztlanti, or damage it well enough to bring it back into the Village's fold. He would be a hero. Not a celebrated one, as he'd probably go back with Danzo's collection of freaks and form a new identity, changing his skin once more to become whatever was needed of him…he knew it was his duty.

It was what he was good at. It had been his purpose ever since he was discovered at that orphanage for abandoned Scions, hidden away from the Village and barely tolerated because of its matron's history, and brought into the fold. He became whatever Danzo wanted him to be, then whatever Orochimaru wanted him to be. It was natural.

He was the son of Xipe Totec. Our Lord the Flayed One. The God who demanded sacrifices of human skins for him to wear rather than hearts and blood like the others. Changing who he was was part of his dominion.

Still, he sometimes wondered, with how much he changed…who was he? What was Kabuto, behind all the masks he had created, both visible and otherwise? One of Orochimaru's pet snakes shed its skin, and Kabuto thought about how similar they really were. Was it a Dodekatheon thought experiment, about the wooden planks being replaced on a ship, that asked the question 'how many planks must be replaced before it was a new ship?' Did that apply to snake scales as well? What about human flesh? What about a man's mental traits?

Said snake started thrashing about, shaking him from his musings and reasserting the task at hand; namely, making sure that all the animals, especially the more-than-natural ones, that Orochimaru had gathered over the years were still loyal in his reduced state. It hadn't been a problem thus far, even with that tiny, still rebellious spark within him prodding him to provoke the rebellion his master feared.

So, as he assured himself that the majority of the snakes in his master's collection had no intention whatsoever of fleeing or devouring said master, with the possible exception of one particularly strong Titanspawn that had just enough of a snake's form to fall into said master's Purview (but Kabuto thought that he could merely advise against using that one), and went to check on their little deal with Tsunade.

She was drinking, of course, when he stumbled upon her, because when wasn't she, and didn't look to be in the mood for Kabuto's games. Unfortunately for her, he felt like playing anyways.

"Anything interesting happen while waiting on Lord Orochimaru's proof?" He asked with a sly grin.

"Our other bandmate showed up," she spat back.

"Jiraiya's in town? Now this could be interesting," Kabuto noted, careful to cover up the panic in his voice.

One Minor God was probably too much for Orochimaru to handle if things went south. Both of the Sankami at once…he'd advise against continuing with this plan, but he knew his master would simply ignore him.

Outwardly, he smiled. "I hope that he doesn't have any plans toward interfering with our arrangement. That would be…unfortunate. For your loved ones most of all." He ducked to the side before her fist punched his head clean off. Her heart wasn't in the strike, fortunately.

"What do you want me to do about it?" She whined. "I'm not even considering killing him, but he won't leave me alone otherwise."

"With your expertise on the human body, I'm sure that you could take him out of commission for a while."

"Since Sarutobi-sensei died," she spared a smoldering glare in his direction, "thanks to your master, Jiraiya's the world's leading expert on Stamina Knacks, and was probably already the master of the Guardian Purview. Normal poison will do nothing to him."

"From a normal Scion, certainly not, but I'm told that you're no normal Scion."

Tsunade almost punched him again, but abstained at the last second. "I still haven't agreed to work with you."

"But you haven't told us to screw off, not really." He slunk away before she could utter those exact words back, not that it would have meant anything. Her heart was still exactly where Sacrifice wanted it to be.

Am I really going to do this? Tsunade asked herself.

Orochimaru's crimes were unforgivable, and that was before he betrayed the Village and killed their Guide. Working with him should have been the last thing on her mind.

But then she thought about a certain Scion of Oghma, a man who, when she demanded that the Village open up a policy of teaching the Health Purview to all Scions Associated, whether they got a Birthright for it or not, and even going so far as to mandate one Scion in each official Band have knowledge of it, stood by her, standing against the Great God-on-Earth himself when he declared it impractical. Less practical than letting hundreds of their own men die from treatable wounds, apparently.

Had her proposal gone through, would he have lived? Would his Band have been able to save him from those Vampires? It wasn't actually possible to say, but her stomach clenched as she pondered it. She had to know all the details, more than what she got from the reports. If what Orochimaru said was true, then she could ask the man himself what happened, what could have saved him.

And then there was her half-brother, another budding little pride of the Deva Clan when it was still a real Clan. She knew for a fact that he could have been saved had someone had an Upper Hero level understanding of the Health Purview in his vicinity on that fateful day. The reports on his injuries had been more than clear about that. Still, she wanted to see him again.

To look on that smiling face, so full of hope for the future, so ready to seek out the position of Great God-on-Earth for himself. His optimism had been infectious, once. Now it only infected her like a disease in the worst sense of the phrase, and seeing that same sentiment plastered over Naruto's face revolted her so much that she almost went through with it to spite him.

Ultimately, she would never make such a decision for such a reason. So, when her mind (and more importantly, her heart), accepted that she was, in fact, going to betray Jiraiya so that she could go through with helping out Orochimaru, it was instead because she didn't want to spend any more time only seeing their faces in her dreams.

The Village had taken them from her, just like it had taken so much else from so many others, so why shouldn't she take something back for once? Why shouldn't she get a little bit of happiness from one of its enemies? Thinking on all she knew about the human body once modified by Stamina Knacks, she started to mix.

--

The next part of learning the Stars Purview, on the surface, seemed much easier than the first part. He had to tell how much time, to the exact second, it took for the sand to reach a point where the hourglass glowed. Then, he had to explain why it wasn't twenty minutes exactly, as it apparently should have been (in spite of Jiraiya's knowing wink while explaining that).

In practice, it proved impossible, largely because it wasn't the same amount of time between each glow, even though he had to give one answer as if it were. What was he missing? What was the trick here?

He angrily spat at the thing as he found himself unable to record the time once again, getting distracted by some optical illusion that made the sand look like it was bending a bit. Trying to ignore it, he stared at the thing and…wait, should he be ignoring it? Looking at it more carefully, he realized that it seemed familiar. It was like that 'aurora' thing that Jiraiya had created to flee the bouncer at that casino. It was so obvious.

He couldn't figure out the time properly because the time was being altered supernaturally. It was warping, and distorting itself to change how long it took for the sand to move, but only slightly, not enough to notice or even affect anything were he not so concerned with precise times at the moment. So then, how in the cold depths of the Underworld was he supposed to figure out how to measure the proper time?

Then he started to wonder what the proper time even was. What did that mean? If time was being 'distorted,' then wasn't however long it took with the distortion now the actual time?

Letting himself go down this tangent, he started to really think about time as a constant, and why it was controlled by the 'Stars' Purview. Jiraiya had told him it was because stars were the original basis for calendars, but why was that? He looked up into the night sky, the twinkling little things spattered across it interrupting the overwhelming darkness. Naruto wondered if that annoyed Mikaboshi. After all, it would be pitch black, except for those unchanging bits of light…unchanging.

If nothing ever changed, could one tell that time had passed? What was time, but the awareness that things were changing? Stars didn't change in timespans that mattered to humans, so they were the symbol of permanence against the ever-forward march of time. Somehow, as this understanding of how the universe in general came to him, an understanding of how to manipulate his ichor in new and exciting ways came to him.

"Stars Purview: Perfect Timing!" Naruto shouted. The distortion was irrelevant; he knew exactly how long it took. He now had one of the two Boons down, and it wasn't even a day later.