Disclaimers, etc.: see chapter one
Opening Theme: No Way Back (AAA Dome Tour 15th Anniversary - thanx AAA lot - Live) by AAA
Ending Theme: Party It Up - City Summer Party Remix - by AAA

Chapter 08 written 10/27/2022

Bleach: Cross
Princess on Vacation
by Eugena

Rated M

Chapter Eight: Rangiku Strikes Out

天国的白雪公主

KARAKURA TOWN - CLOTHING STORE

Momo Hinamori looked on but did nothing to comfort Rangiku. She plastered a clueless look on her face while she overheard Nanao and Yumichika. She was, of course, anything but clueless.

How could Rangiku be so willingly stupid? How could she have been so involved in Shirahime's life before that she could not see what was so obvious everyone knew it already?

She caught Yachiru's sad expression before she covered it up.

Even the kids were in on it.

Sierra could not look clueless even if she wanted to. The deep hue of blue in her eyes pulsed, a sure sign she was ready to kill someone.

"This is taicho's vacation, okay?" Momo said to her. "Let's just endure some stupidity."

"It's not just that, it's -."

Matsumoto grabbed her phone. She dialed. "Oh, Ken-bear, they're all being so-."

"You idiot!" Sierra screamed at Matsumoto.

"Hello? Rangiku?"

The others could hear a young male voice on the other end of the phone.

"Is that who I think it is?" Momo asked.

Yoruichi, Kisuke, and Soi Fon turned, their attention glued to the phone.

"You really didn't?" Kisuke asked.

"Damn, Rangiku, I know you're jealous, but even this is too much," Yoruichi said.

Shirahime snatched the phone.

"Hello?" she asked.

"Uh, hi, hello, my princess," Ichigo greeted on the other end of the phone.

"Ichigo," Shirahime said. "I didn't realize you were dating Rangiku. Isn't she too old for you? I do not approve. I will tell your father I do not approve. He likes to flirt with high schoolers just as much as Kisuke here, but I'm sure I'll make him see reason."

"I don't want to be dating Rangiku. I'm not dating her."

"Well, I can be relieved about something I guess."

"Actually, I was hoping maybe you and I -."

"Can be friends," she finished for him. "You know, the kind where one is the older mentor about important things in life. Things that actually matter. Not things that only matter for people who do nothing but flirt. I'm sure you understand, Ichigo. I'm certain you don't mean like go on a date."

"Of course, he does not!" Lafiel called.

"Absolutely correct!" Retsu practically yelled into the phone.

"Speaking of dates, though," Shirahime said, "I should really call Ryuken at some point."

"Uryu's dad?" Ichigo asked. "Why?"

"Well, he did ask me out last time I had to pretend to be a human."

"I'm sure it was to just go along!" Ichigo exclaimed.

"Eh, what can I say? He didn't mind last time I stayed over."

"You don't mean that."

"Just ask Uryu. He saw me leave. I've been over several times."

"You're just messing with me."

Her parents looked at her, accusatory stares speaking volumes. Nanao and Isana looked jealous.

"Believe me or not," Shirahime said. "It's your life."

"Well, um, if you want to be such a mentor," Ichigo said, "there is something I need advice on."

"Such as?"

"Well, it's kind of embarrassing, and I don't really know how to say this, but I sort of - on accident - sort of heard my sister -."

"Okay, well, was this other person also a child or was this man or woman an adult? Because if it's the last one, I'll be more than happy to kill them. Inch-by-inch."

"No, no. Not like she was really. I mean she just had these thoughts and -."

"Ok, I see," Shirahime said.

"It was Hitsugaya!" he said quickly.

"As in he was there?"

"No, I mean I feel weird she wants to - you know - with him!"

"Oh," Shirahime said.

Matsumoto started clapping. Everyone else looked like they were going to kill her.

"Well, Ichigo, first off that is very uncomfortable. Really. Second off, it is disturbing. He's such a fool. What an idiot. Now everyone who knows feels really gross about this."

"Well, what do you mean?"

"Aside from the obvious?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you remember when your other self took your place?"

"Yeah, of course I do."

"And what did he say about Hitsugaya? Why did he say Hitsugaya always insulted me?"

"He said, he said -," Ichigo tried to recall. "He said - oh, you're kidding, right?"

Shirahime held the phone away so she could listen to the rest of it privately.

Ichigo whispered in disbelief. "That's why you never pushed him away like you did me. That's real? That's all real? So, when he looked like - that's his real self?"

"Yep," she said.

"But why the hell?" His voice echoed this time and Shirahime moved the phone. The others could now listen in.

"He's an idiot!" Kisuke volunteered, guessing Ichigo was talking about the secret.

"Yuki Papa should kill him for his insult," Raiko said.

"Maybe you should add Rangiku here for calling Ichigo in the first place," Sierra added.

"Rangiku, why did you call Ichigo anyway?" Momo asked.

"Me?" Rangiku asked. "No, he called me."

"That's not true, Rangiku," he said. "You sent me this text message and emojis about how I should see Shirahime. Even told me you guys would be coming to this beach."

"Rangiku, you didn't!" Rukia yelled.

"You gave Ichigo the impression he should see her?" Nanao asked.

"Stop making things up, Ichigo," Rangiku complained. "I sent all that to my Ken-bear. That's right, my Ken-bear." She looked at Shirahime. "As in the man the princess pushed away."

"You don't actually know how to use your phone, do you?" Kisuke asked.

Rangiku looked ready to cry.

"Okay, Ichigo," Shirahime said. "Please forgive whatever stupid thing she said to you. She thought she was talking to Kenpachi. I mean I told the man I never wanted to see him again, and I guess this was her way of cheering him up and all. Just got the two of you confused - somehow. I guess she sleeps a bit too much lately. So, sorry to disturb your day, Ichigo. Really, really sorry about Karin's hang up on Hitsugaya. On so many levels."

"Yeah, you and me both now. Oh, gross. I mean it was gross before, but now that I know."

"Yeah, don't worry, Shiro's getting his ass kicked by someone real soon. Not that it will fix the craziness, but hey -."

"I'll feel better," they both said at the same time.

They laughed.

"Well, I'd better let you go, Ichigo, to enjoy your day. Go hang out with friends or something," Shirahime said to him. She clicked the phone off.

Shirahime looked to her audience. "Well, not the worst conversation I've had with him. It's pretty good if you consider he didn't call me his wife or the woman he wanted to marry."

"A real miracle right there," Rukia said. "Sorry, though, he brought up Karin. So awkward."

"Well, his mom's not around anymore. Maybe he needed an opinion that didn't come from his dad."

"But he keeps hoping you'll be his wife," Rukia reminded her.

谢谢你们的阅读。