Title: Closer (Make Believe)
Author: Stargazing85
Part: Two
Primary characters: Tia Ramirez, Conner McDermott
Disclaimer: I don't own the Sweet Valley series.
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Tia Ramirez
Conner and me. Why are we acting so weird around each other? I mean, this is Conner here. Flowerbed Conner. I don't like him. I don't like him. I don't like him.
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Conner McDermott
You'd think I'd hate girls with all the crap from my absentee mother, Liz sucking face with Evan behind my back, Alanna lying and drinking behind my back. And Tia kissing me even though I started it behind Liz's back. But I don't. Especially not Tia.
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For the third time in ten minutes, Tia pulled on the denim blue shorts she wore while she vacuumed her pale-colored room. On first glance, they seemed like nothing special. Marred by random flecks of paint here and there. They were her jeans from sophomore year, faded long since and a little too tight in that backside area but possessing all sorts of sentimental value. Angel and she had painted one of Miguel's bureaus one afternoon, the afternoon when she first considered herself to be in love with him. Two and a half years ago.
On her bed lie her French textbook and Ferris Bueller's Day Off. One of her favorite movies, easily in her top three. She promised herself she would watch the movie as soon as she finished up with her vocabulary exercises. Problem was, the incentive didn't work. She knew that she would probably watch the movie first then do her homework.
"1986 Matthew Broderick? You're stealing my concentration…" she mumbled, putting the vacuum up and flopping on her bed, her dark wavy hair contrasting sharply with the lacy white pillows on which she lay her head. Glancing up at the ceiling, she sighed. Life had been easy then. When she and Angel had been together, barely starting the Varsity cheer squad and so obviously psyched about wearing the gold and green polyester outfit that most of the junior and senior cheerleaders donned on game days. Angel had been so supportive and Andy and Conner (though sophomore year was when he begun to grow up and the junior, freshman, and sophomore girls all looked at him with adoring eyes while glaring at Tia with those same eyes narrowed into slits, their insults carefully veiled yet insulting enough to sting).
Especially the cheer squad.
The girls were astonished that a mere fifteen year old was entering the varsity territory, her and Melissa Fox. At first, the two were met with astonished looks and raised eyebrows; but, then when noticing the association the two girls had, Tia with heartthrob Conner McDermott and to-die-for Will Simmons, the insults began. Always thinly veiled, and locker room gossip spoke of the "whipped" boys for "just some dumb amateur bitches…" Tia always took it with a grain of salt, but Melissa wore her smile. Proud to be the talk of the girls. She thrived on attention, especially one that would consider her lucky for all the jealousy that lie implied in the foul language.
It was almost as if that seemed like another life. Conner and she used to come over to each other's houses nearly every afternoon and veg out. Angel, at first, skeptical of their platonic relationship, warmed to Conner after a while and Conner's girlfriends, all but spitting on Tia, began to be used to having her around often.
Her mind traveled back, further still. To junior high, when Conner asked her to the dance with his trademark smile, lazy in a confident way. She had not liked him then, and it had almost grossed her out before he replied he was joking. After a moment of intense laughter, Andy came out from the bushes holding a Polaroid of her shocked expression. He still had that somewhere in his room.
Her hands behind her head, her dark hair splayed around her, she seemed like an angel, tranquil and unhurried. Completely different from her usual animated self. El Carro High. That seemed like a name foreign and strange. Something that belonged to an alternate universe. Something unreal. Unreal. Unreal, that the high school with the beautiful green lawn and three stories full of classrooms with the famous William Stadium that used to be packed with fans during football season was leveled during the Earthquake.
She felt so detached from life at El Carro…as if her life had begun to move too fast from the end of junior year to now- nearing the end of senior year. She'd never forget the first day of high school, linking arms with a laughing red-haired Andy and a scowling and reluctant Conner McDermott, yelling "First Day of Class? Over!" through the double front doors of the first floor at El Carro High.
Tap, tap. A rapping at her glass broke her from her thoughts and she looked over, her small hands still behind her head. A mysterious pair of green eyes met hers through the glass before lifting up the window and climbing in.
And something was obviously wrong, his demeanor still gave away nothing. His confident, appearing languid but always alert stature leaned one arm against her redwood dresser while stuffing his left hand in the front pocket of his Levis.
"What's up?" she hoisted herself up, and crossed her goldenish legs Indian style, noting the clenching and unclenching of his jaw which usually signaled tell-tale anger or frustration. Almost automatically, she began to remove her French book and Ferris Bueller tape out of the way to make room for Conner on her queen-size bed.
"She's drinking again, Tee." His voice wavered with anger, tinged with disappointment and dripping with disgust and he looked down at her beige carpeting before lifting his tormented eyes to meet hers, full of undisguised emotion.
"Oh Conner." She breathed, knowing how disappointed he felt. When his mother first arrived back from rehab in Minnesota, he had been so psyched that she had actually most likely sobered up for good. She recalled being in House of Java, talking with him, seeing his verdant eyes dance and his leg bouncing up and down from pent-up excitement. "Are you sure? Maybe you're jumping to conclusions?"
"No! Tee, I know what I saw!" he hissed, staring at her hard as her brown eyes widened a bit at his tone and then hardened. "Sit down and hear me out before you go chewing her out." She patted the clear spot on her bed next to her.
He trudged over to her and sat down, his leg beginning to bounce as the result of pent-up energy and unreleased feelings. To be surrounded by her pale-colored room and feminine floral scent would be calming if not for his rising frustration.
"She…left her bedroom door open and I saw enough. She was snoring, passed out on the floor and the room reeked of alcohol." His fists clenched, he sat rigidly with his posture erect and his back completely straight, his breathing hard and his eyes slightly narrowing. Only twice had she seen him like this.
The time when a girl whose boyfriend desired Megan began to spread rumors about Megan and her half-brother. When Conner had confronted the girl, asking about whether she started them, she had actually began to flirt with him and when he grew angry, unable to get a definite answer; Tia remembered his frustration and very quietly telling the girl how lucky she was that she wasn't a man at that moment.
The other time had been the very first time his mother had gotten trashed at a local country club. They had been all of about thirteen. Their last year of junior high and it was the night before graduation. Conner had snuck to her window around 11 p.m., pleading in his confident and reluctant way if she would watch over Megan (in bed recovering from pneumonia) while he took a cab to the country club to pick up his mom.
"Maybe you're overreacting." She watched him as he tensed at her words and swung around, glaring at her with narrowed eyes, nearly startling her and she began pulling absent-mindedly at a stray strand of thread from her beige, white, and pink comforter. Instantly, she knew those had not been the right words to say.
"Overreacting? Damnit, Tee! With the fuckin' bottle lying on the floor? What more evidence do you need? A B.A.C. test?" his voice dripped with antagonism and he ran a beige hand through his short brown hair, shaking.
"Well, excuse me for listening. You come over to talk to me about it, and then when I try to come you down, you lace into me? That makes a lot of since, C." she swung her legs to the edge of the bed, her back to him as she dangled her feet before exhaling. "Look, I know how disappointed you are. I'm here for you to vent. But don't chew me out before hearing me out? Deal? We'll straighten this out."
"Deal." He smiled, almost relieved. "I saw the bottle Tee. And I'm…freakin' out. It'll hurt Sandy. It doesn't bother me much anymore; I didn't have my hopes up too much in the first place for her recovery. But Sandy, she loves Mom sober and into what she does. Just like old times. She's been so trashed from the time I've been twelve that I don't remember much about her sober during high school. But Sandy'll die if Mom goes back."
Tia kept pulling on the stray strand, biting her lip nervously. "Where is she now?" Then she brought her downcast gaze to his face, reluctant to see his hardened expression, one that had been painfully familiar throughout most of times in high school when she came over to Conner's and his mom slurred through the short and awkward conversations.
"At Wendy's house. She doesn't know yet." He looked everywhere but at Tia, his indignant energy almost bursting through his chest and flowing through his veins, his breathing erratic and short. His leg bouncing up and down as he exhaled sharply. "I just…I don't know. I need a place to crash tonight. If I stay one moment in that house, I'll…..I can't stay in that house tonight."
His green eyes finally focused on her heart-shaped face, her cognac-colored eyes, warm and comforting. She looked around, her gaze focused on the carpet for a moment or two before she nodded, "But Megan? What about her? Is she spending the night?"
"I left her a note."
"Oh." She smiled, "Already had a plan?"
"Yeah." He exhaled, his leg continuing to bounce as he pulled the keys from his pocket and leaned over to place them on her nightstand. "I just need to veg."
"Sure." A smile tugged at her lips as she stood, placing her hands on her hips, her dark hair flowing down her back. "But first, you gotta calm down. There's room only for one energyful person in this place…and it won't be you."
"Good." His low and gravelly voice responded, his leg stopping its little bouncing movement and his body suddenly feeling more tired than he previously thought. He glanced at the digital clock on his right. It read: 10:42 p.m. Somehow, it hadn't seemed that late but then again…the time hadn't been the priority in his mind.
"I was supposed to study my French vocab but then you burst in here, so I couldn't. Now it'll have to wait until tomorrow." She walked over to the wall, flicking off the light as the blue light of the blank screen on channel three illuminated the dark room. Suddenly realizing how tired she was, she glanced at the clock and yawned, noting the time. "I was gonna go to the Riot but for some reason I was really tired tonight. Besides, Angel's coming tomorrow anyway."
"Yeah," Conner nodded, his trademark smile answering her. "Ferris Bueller?"
Kneeling down to pop the tape in the VCR, she glanced back, flashing her bright smile. "Of course. Unless you want something romantic or sad and sappy." She finished, knowing how much he despised romance movies and melodramatic sob story flicks.
As the opening tunes of the movie wafted from her stereo and filled the room, she walked over to her door. "I'll go get the supplies." The standard Mallomar apiece and popcorn, their movie-viewing snacks. "A pair of Angel's sweatpants are in the top drawer, next to the VCR. Be right back." And then she flounced off.
He propped himself among the lacy white down pillows on Tia's bed as he placed his hands behind his head, glancing up at her ceiling. This was definitely what he needed. A carefree night with his best friend, comfortable and easy. Without those annoying little feelings and thoughts about her. But mysteriously, they had disappeared. And gone. And now they were back to normal. Just how he liked it.
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Tia Ramirez
How strange. Those feelings haven't came up again. And I'm glad, 'cause Angel would definitely notice if Conner and I were acting weird. And he's not dumb- he 'd put two and two together. Oh well. We're good-looking people, and we're not blind. Sometimes, we'll look at each other in a different way, but it's nothing serious. Besides Angel's coming tomorrow.
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Conner McDermott
Tia and I are just friends. Back to how it used to be. I need some sense of normalcy anyway.