A/N:

What's this?

Kyo's being… INNOCENT.

Gasp.

-

Darn.

This sucks.

-

"What's up?"

"Be quiet and I'll tell you!"

-

Akito told me I had to be innocent for one day to see if my childhood innocence came back.

-

"Don't be stupid," I told her. "That disappeared when I lost my virginity. Maybe before. Yeah, definitely before."

-

She wasn't impressed, I can tell ya.

-

Tried to rape her, to make her leave me alone.

Only made things worse.

-

"Kyo Sohma! For one day, you must not be perverted, have sex, swear or make innuendo's! Nor can you masturbate!"

-

I left.

In… ANGST MODE.

-

And so, this will be fully innocent.

I hope your twisted virgin eyes enjoy it.

-

"…"

"Leave me alone, Haru,"

"Huh! When did you become such a sook, Stupid Cat?"

"When Akito made me be… INNOCENT, (cry)"

"Oh dear LORD. May God have mercy on your soul!"

"Haru, that's not appropriate now,"

"…Sorry,"

-

And so Shiggy took my CENSORED WORD and stuck them under his bed.

So sad.

-

"Can't I just keep the mags under my bed? I wont read them! I swear!"

"No, no…"

"Akito never said I couldn't read my CENSORED WORD!"

"But, I want to read them. Seeya!"

-

So now, I'm stuck in bedroom all alone with no CENSORED.

I can't even CENSORE with myself.

-

Darn!

-

"Why don't you stop crying!"

"Go away, Yuki!"

"Well, if you don't stop crying, I'm going to have to play some very loud and CENSOREGRAPHIC music,"

"…Die,"

-

But in the end, he played it anyway. Just to get back at me.

Moron.

-

"…Put your hands down my pants and I'll bet you'll feel nuts…"

"YUKI! TURN THAT CENSORED WORD OFF!"

"Why?"

"Because I can't sing along to the size of my CENSORES."

"…Oh."

-

I wish this day would hurry up and be over.

-

"I can make it go away pretty fast!"

"How so, Momiji?"

"Oh, I think you know…"

"Sorry, no pleasure today."

"(angst)"

-

And you wouldn't believe it.

I had to go to school.

-

On the day when all the CENSORE stars come along and dance.

On poles.

-

Ah CENSORE it!

-

"No need for that sort of language, Mr. Sohma,"

"Hello, I said censore."

"…"

-

So I was walking down the hall when…

-

"Oh, hey hottie! What some fun?"

-

Those darn CENSORE stars.

All they want is me.

-

"And me!"

"No Hatori. Don't even think that for a minute,"

"…(sad)"

-

Have YOU made Hatori sad today?

-

But… I had to say no.

-

"Sorry ladies, I'm on a contract."

"Oh too bad! We were gonna treat you with some CENSORE and a bit of CENSORE CENSORE... and a CENSORE job."

"…(MEGA ANGST)"

-

Akito.

I bet she planned this.

-

So I went into the bathroom.

But I remembered I wasn't allowed to CENSORE off…

So I… sat on the sink and sooked.

-

"Oh, didn't think I'd see you here,"

"Y-Yankee!"

"What? Oh! Tohru never told you?"

"You're a guy?"

"No. You're in the girls bathroom! CENSORE OFF!"

-

I think everyone hates me.

Except Hiro.

-

"I hate you,"

"Hiro, baby, no you don't. I got your Valentine's card. That girl gave it to me,"

"…HUH?"

"You know…"

"Kyo, the girls card from what the girl,"

"…(run)"

-

What a beautiful tragedy.

-

The tragedy of being me… on this day.

-

"Don't be so sad Kyo. There's always tomorrow."

"Master! I'm sick of you're darn sensitivity shi-at."

"You swore,"

"DIDN'T"

-

So… it's night time now.

I survived.

Just.

-

"Hey Kyo, at midnight you can CENSORE off to feel better,"

"You're right Shiggy. Thanks."

-

I bet he'll come and pleasure me.

-

MIDNIGHT EXACTLY.

-

Well, this sucks.

-

I slept naked so that Shiggy would come.

He didn't come.

And neither did I.

-

How sad.

-

"Shut up,"

"STOP LISTENING TO ME!"

-

Huh, what are you still doing here?

-

FUCK OFF!

-

A/N:

Nyaa.

See that?

I can't be innocent at all.

(sniffle)

(mega sniffle)