Okay, I realize I was gone for a really long time. Please don't hate me. My stupid life is like a roller coaster, and I write best when I'm at the top.

On the other hand, since we can no longer do review replies (Which is no fun…I liked replying to reviews!), I shall now only address reviews if something important comes up.

I've taken a sudden liking to Japanese. I can speak simple phrases too.

A special honor goes to my own little sister and writer in the making: Laine Squirrel.

Disclaimer: I only own Dove, Crow, and Remando. Boo hoo. (Not really, since owning the Teen Titans would get the world destroyed.)

On with the story:

Never Court A Bird

By Lea Cat

1/23/06

Raven was up early and bright the next morning.

To tell you the truth, she was a little excited about meeting Dove's first suitor. If he wasn't just right for her sister, Raven would be correcting many things…

For now, she would get to know him first.

When the doorbell rang, she was ready for him, and opened the door right away. Remando's first impression of Raven was that of someone regarding a mafia in disguise. She knew right away what he was planning. Raven's eyes narrowed dangerously, but otherwise, she showed no other reaction. "Hello." She greeted him courteously.

"Well, hello to you too." He replied, tipping his hat at her. "My name is Remando."

"Nice to meet you, Remando. I'm Raven, Dove's older sister." Raven held out her hand kindly, but the look in her eyes was anything but kind.

Remando took note of that nervously. Already, Raven was beginning to suspect what he was up to. That was not good.

Outwardly, he smiled and took her hand in a firm handshake. "It's nice to meet you too."

"Come in." Raven invited. To the untrained eye, it looked like she was being friendly. But, from Remando's point of view, it looked like she was leading him into a trap. He gulped silently, and followed her in. "Hey, everyone! Our guest is here." She called out.

The way she emphasized the word 'guest' nearly screamed that he would not be staying very long. He mentally steeled himself as everyone flooded in to meet him. Remando slapped the best smile he could on his face and said pleasantly, "Hello, I'm Remando, nice to meet you all."

Crow gave him a look that said he had come to the same conclusion as Raven. "Well, hello Remando," Crow drawled lazily, "I'm Crow, Dove's older brother." He flashed a predatory smile.

Remando showed none of the nervousness or fear on his face; instead, he replied with a charming, "Oh, it's really nice to meet you."

Yes, really charming.

"Hello, we're the Titans. I'm Robin, that's Beast Boy, Cyborg, and Starfire. You already know Raven." Robin informed Remando.

Raven smiled, slowly and lazily, like a satisfied cat. "Yes, I'm sure we'll be really good friends…"

Beast Boy fidgeted. He was absolutely positive that that Remando dude was going to die, in the slowest and most painful fashion Raven could come up with. And from personal experience, Raven had a lot of different ways to kill a person.

(XXhxaxpxpxyxxdxexpxrxexsxsxixoxnxxhxaxtxrxexdxxhxoxpxeXX)

"Well Remando, tell us a bit about yourself." Raven said.

"Yes, we hardly know anything about our sister's suitor." Crow agreed from the other end of the couch.

Remando looked back and forth between the siblings, absolutely positive that this was running more along the lines of an interrogation rather than a conversation. "Well, I come from a small town in Azerath and I have an older brother." He replied. His 'older brother' was actually the employer who hired him to court Dove.

"Oh?" Crow asked, shifting so that he was more sprawled than sitting on the couch. "What's his name?"

"Hawk." Remando slipped. He attempted to cover up. "At least, that's what I call him. His real name's Eduardo."

"Really." Raven said in a flat tone. "Care to tell us why you call him Hawk?"

"W-well we always used to play around and he always seemed to catch me when we were playing tag or hide and seek. You know, almost like a hawk."

"Isn't that interesting…" Raven drawled, as she turned to Crow. "It seems like a coincidence that we also have a brother named Hawk."

Crow nodded in agreement. "That's right, we have a full demon brother. When was the last time we saw him?"

"Only the last time he attempted to murder us. We never were really close to our older brother. But isn't he dead? I heard he was on Infrain when it exploded." Raven muttered.

"Hmm…your right! We even went to his funeral." Crow reminisced.

"What's your favorite ice cream flavor?" Raven suddenly asked Remando.

He looked up in surprise. "Um…chocolate, why?"

"I'll go get us some." Raven said, getting up.

"Ooh! Get me some too! I want cookie doe!" Crow grinned eagerly.

Raven shook her head. "I can't believe you're 25…more like 2 if you ask me…" She disappeared into the kitchen.

The moment she was gone, silence filled the room. Remando fidgeted as Crow's black eyes pierced him like spikes, as if glaring would help the situation.

Raven reappeared with three cones, chocolate, cookie doe, and green tea. She handed the cones over and watched as Remando ate every bite. He was a bit afraid it was poisoned.

Raven began delicately licking her cone, all the while still watching Remando with unreadable violet eyes. It didn't help that Crow was still glaring at him.

Remando jumped as a loud exclamation of, "I bet I can beat your high score!" filled the air. All eyes turned and glared as Beast Boy hopped into the room.

He paused. "Did I interrupt something?"

"No." Raven said frostily with a glare that could kill. "No, you didn't interrupt anything."

"Yeah!" Crow chirped. (A/N: HA! THE CROW CHIRPED! …okay, shutting up now…) "You only waltzed in here and everyone's staring at you and the atmosphere is tense. No, Beast Boy, you absolutely did NOT interrupt anything at all!" Crow finished with an overly cheerful smile.

Beast Boy gulped. When the Crow was overly nice to you while Raven was being extra ice queen, Crow was subtly hinting it was time to run. "Uh…I'll just be going now…"

"Beast Boy I need to talk to you." Raven suddenly said, standing up. All color in Beast Boy's face drained.

"Stop! Please stop! I'm sorry, okay Ravey? I'm sorry! No! Wait!" Beast Boy cried as Raven dragged him out of the room with a cheerful smile plastered on her face.

Remando watched the exchange and felt even more fearful for his life. If Raven could reduce Beast Boy to bawling, what could she make him do? He shivered.

It would be a long week.

I'm sorry guys, but this is going to be the last update for a while. I let my stories write themselves, and this one's just not wracking up any inspiration. I mean, I know how it will end, I just have to get the characters there too.

I'll be updating Through My Eyes shortly. I just have to change a few things.

Hee, hee, don't kill me for not updating for awhile and then leaving the story on hiatus. (Several vases hits Lea's head.)

ORO!(Can anyone guess where that came from? Heh, heh…)

Don't worry, I'll update A.S.A.P. promise, de gozaru yo! (Fifteen points for this one!)

-Lea Cat