Again, I need to pay heed to Ms. Ripley. I realize most of the readers have read the details she laid out, but I felt I should relate them from Scarlett's perspective...not sure I did it justice in this update...but I hope I laid the groundwork for the next one... And thanks again for the feedback on this story...You guys are great:)

Chapter 3

"No..," Rhett slowly drawled in response. "I believe I'm the one who should explain..."

"If you'll allow me, I believe I can make more sense of it..."

Rhett was an educated man, perhaps too educated. In his vast experience, he knew firsthand the nightmarish suffering she must have endured, all due to him. If only it had occurred to him what might have eventuated from that one time with her. It wasn't implausible. It had happened once before. And it occurred to him the reason he had not realized it was because he had not allowed himself to, instead had stopped at nothing in effort to block her from his mind and looked on her as an obstacle rather than the person she was.

"I'm not certain where to begin, other than to tell you I had a difficult labor with Cat," she continued, added,"But I suppose that's obvious to you.."

"Yes..," he wearily nodded in agreement. "I gathered that..."

Gesturing toward the high-backed ranya chairs adjacent the window overlooking the city below, Scarlett tightened her wrapper as she strode in their direction. "Why don't we sit down...?"

Rhett dutifully followed her to the window, took a seat in the chair alongside her after which Scarlett set about relating to him the story of the night Katie Colum O'Hara was born.

"I went into labor on All Hallow's Eve. A terrible storm struck up just after nightfall. The last thing I remember doing before my water broke is that I had been going over some details, ordering a mattress and sheets for the State Room where I planned to have her to be exact." A flicker of laughter befell her eyes as she stated,"Just minutes before I made a joke to Mrs. Fitzpatrick about the bed being so huge the doctor might not reach her when she came..."

At that, Scarlett paused briefly in order to gauge Rhett's reaction. If he thought her latest utterance to be humorous he did not outwardly display, however, and with the utmost seriousness induced her forward. "Go on..."

"Alright. Like I told you, it was storming something awful. After leaving the State Room, Mrs. Fitzpatrick and I walked downstairs to the kitchen. We hadn't been there long when I felt a sharp pain, first in my back then down my leg. My water broke..." Scarlett paused again only this time, it wasn't to check his response. Rather, it was due to her memory of how frightened she had been at the sight of dark liquid emitted from her and the fear she had felt not for herself, but for her baby. "I knew right away something was amiss. I was bleeding, you see..."

"I had Mrs. Fitzpatrick help me on to the table, then sent her out into the storm for a doctor..."

"Was there anyone else in the house?"

"No...," she shook her head. "I was alone..."

Rhett repeated the phrase in his head. I was alone. Alone and frightened. And due to me, he told himself, abandoned. What should he say? What could he say? Rhett, who could make sense of anything, put any situation in a jocular light with his sharp wit, was beyond words and thus, could only manage,"I see..."

"The pain wasn't unbearable..," Scarlett offered in effort to steal away what she knew must have been rummaging through his mind. "To be honest, I was more concerned for Mrs. Fitzpatrick than I was for myself of the baby at that point..."

A figment of her mother's teachings occurred to her as she continued to recount the story, and in looking at Rhett, knowing without him stating it what he must have been thinking, Scarlett elected to withhold the most minute details. She was, in her own way, protecting him. His quietude spoke volumes, told her of his self-condemnation. Adding to that would be of no good. "When Mrs. Fitzpatrick returned, she informed me Colum was bringing a doctor. So we waited for what, or at least seemed to me, days. When he showed up, he was accompanied by a midwife. As it turned out, the rains had flooded the river and he was unable to procure a doctor...And as for Cat, she was kicking like mad, Rhett..."

Rhett gazed on at her in sheer amazement. Here she was, relating to him the tale of what he knew was a horrific experience. And yet, there was no anger in her voice. No semblance of her attempting to bestow blame on him for it. Guilt that he deserved. Far removed from that, she was full of vivacity as she told of that night. She glowed. "Sounds an awful lot like her mother...," he chuckled along with her.

"Well, that isn't an altogether bad thing, I hope...," she retorted, laughter apparent in her voice.

"Not at all..."

"I thought you might say that..."

Yes, she had changed, he thought to himself. Many aspects of her were different. But not everything. Her ability to flirt had not diminished, nor had her competence to coax a man into falling in love with her simply by bestowing him with a smile though Rhett reminded himself it was her scowl that first endeared her to him, set her apart from all others. He became so caught up in it he was forced to remind himself of the discussion at hand. "Please continue..."

"The midwife...," Scarlett's voice broke off as she contemplated how to describe the woman whom she knew was there in the room, but possessed only a vague physical memory of. "She was...inadequate..."

"And to be honest, I don't recall a great deal except to say I remember Mrs. Fitzpatrick sending her away. From that point, I don't remember much and what I do know was told to me by Colum and Mrs. Fitzpatrick..."

"And that was...?"

"Not long after the midwife was removed from the room, the cailleach appeared..."

"Grainne...?"

"Yes. The wise woman Cat spoke of in the tower. I do recall her standing over me at some point, pouring some foreign liquid in my mouth. I'm not certain what it was, only recall that I was powerfully thirsty and lurched my head forward to accept it...It might have been laudanum, but I can't say for certain..."

"Then...?"

"And then...she performed the surgery and delivered Cat..."

With Bonnie, she had been surrounded by those who cared most about her. Rhett, Melly, Mammy, and Dr. Meade. Yes, Mrs. Fitzpatrick and Colum adored Scarlett and he was thankful, grateful for their presence with her. But that did nothing to influence Rhett's guilt over his absence.

"She was so beautiful, Rhett..."

Had she been in America, with him, Scarlett would have had the best medical care. Instead, both she and their baby were forced to rely on a 'wise woman'. She should have given birth in the comfort of a thick, woolen mattress. Instead, she had given birth on a table. How could he ever compensate for that?

She should have been angry with him but she was not. Far removed, she was beautiful, even more beautiful than she had been on their day of sailing when Rhett had been unable to remove his eyes from her despite her ridiculous attire. He did not know this woman before him. And though she was a stranger to him now, his love for her had not lessened. Rather, he loved her more.