AN: Hello, FF and Harry Potter fans. I do not own Harry Potter, but feel free to enjoy this or hate it. If you enjoy it, please leave a lovely comment, if you hate it, then leave some constructive criticism, thanks!

Can You Take the Jump?

Chapter 54

Hermione's grip turned loose inside Severus's hand, and the knife, now turning back into her wand, fell to the floor, clattering against the stone ground.

"Hermione?"

He could see the magic seep away from her, the overwhelming power that flowed within her only seconds ago, rushing away. It revealed Hermione Evans as she truly was. Weak, skinny, sickly, and dying. Severus instinctively shielded her from others' view.

"Hermione?"

Then she fainted in his arms.

...

Esther Bagnold sighed as she removed her cloak and covered the body of the girl who lay dead on the cold floor. She gently caressed the face of the girl on the floor, her dark brown eyes had a glazed expression irreplicable by those who were alive. There was something about life that gave a glint that was lost as soon as people died. A fact that she'd gotten far too familiar with.

She closed her eyes for her, but as she moved her finger over her face, she felt moisture. Tears. There was a bittersweet relief that someone had grieved for her, someone to hold her as her soul left her body. Esther had witnessed too many who died completely alone and unmourned, at least at the time of the death.

She'd seen many families and friends be stricken with an odd sense of guilt when they realized their loved one had unknowingly died. The guilt of not knowing and the guilt of living their lives normally and happily while their loved one lay cold and alone somewhere in the dark.

She wasn't sure what was worse, being traumatized by witnessing the death or feeling guilty for not knowing.

"Bagnold," Moody's gruff voice called for her. Walking next to him was Albus Dumbledore. It was weird seeing him again, she felt like a kid, a student running around the corridors of Hogwarts with her friends as she had in the past.

"Yes, sir."

"Oh," the Headmaster, removed his hat and crouched low to the floor next to the dead student. When he'd been standing, he seemed excessively tall, but seeing him so low on the floor, he became so small. "Oh, my dear."

"Do you have a name for her?" Moody's normally insensitive nature softened at the sight of the dead girl. She was so bloody young, the youngest casualty they've had in this goddamn war.

"Lyana Pearson," Dumbledore replied for her. "A 6th-year Gryffindor student. Her parents are Ciaran Pearson, and Meredith Johnson. They own a small parchment shop in Kenmare, Ireland. Good people. And I'm sure she was an even better daughter."

Esther's heart ached, but she thanked him for the information.

"Frank!" She called to their youngest Auror.

"Yeah!" He replied from a distance, he'd been rounding up the other Death Eaters. He ran up to them but abruptly stopped when he saw the girl lying on the floor.

"Dear Merlin," he gasped.

Esther wrote down the information Dumbledore had said, then handed it to Frank.

"Wha—"

"Go notify her parents of her death."

He staggered back. As the rookie, it was Frank's first death notice.

"I've never…What do I—"

"I will go with you, Mr. Longbottom," Dumbledore told him. The old wizard placed a gentle hand over the girl's heart. "I am the Headmaster in charge of her safety. I was the one who ultimately failed. I will tell her parents. Alastor, would you please bring her to the castle? Poppy will clean up whatever debris that's left on her to ensure that her parents don't get too, no, more shocked than necessary."

The Headmaster wobbled as he stood up. Esther reached out to help him, only to see the palpable grief on his face.

"Thank you."

She stared at the empty space after they apparated away.

Moody grabbed her arm and pulled her aggressively to an isolated corner.

"How the hell did you know this was happening?"

"I didn't. Not really."

"Don't you lie to me, Bagnold! You were the one who called a whole division here and was the first to arrive! How could you have done that if you hadn't known!"

"I got an anonymous tip!" She ripped her arm out of Moody's painful grip. "I got a tip last night, but I didn't really believe it. It claimed there'd be an attack at Hogsmeade today, so I came to the village in the morning and stayed for 3 hours, but nothing happened so I left. I gave Rosmerta my information for a floo call just in case. That's how I knew."

"An anonymous tip? Why didn't you notify me or your other superiors?"

Bagnold looked around, making sure she wasn't being overheard. "Sir, the department isn't what it used to be. I had to make sure the tip wasn't just a distraction like it'd been the last few times. I was almost sure it was until Rosmerta called."

"Have you gathered any information from the tip?"

She shook her head. "I investigated the note as soon as I got it, trying to see any markings or specific penmanship to tip off who'd sent it, but nothing. I think they used an enchanted quill."

"The owl?"

"Generic owl used at the post."

"What about the owlery? Did they get a good look at who it was?"

"No, just a guy. With brown hair and brown eyes. It was as if he was trying to give the most generic description of a Caucasian man in their mid 20 to 30s possible. Nothing distinctive in the voice or the gait or their face."

"What about the serial number on the money he used to pay?"

"Sir," she sighed in frustration, "with all due respect, I've already done a thorough investigation."

Moody paused, "Yes, I apologize. It's just…he's never attacked the children before."

While all children were precious and deserved love and protection, magical children were especially rare. The population was declining, not at a noticeable rate from year to year, but the great hall that was once filled to the brim with rowdy children was only half full. Many of the classrooms remained empty and abandoned, collecting dust and cobwebs. The only numbers that grew at Hogwarts were the tuition fee and the number of ghosts.

"This will shake our world."

"We've prolonged the news of this war long enough," Moody sighed. He lifted his wand and gently levitated the still child. "The people have the right to prepare and make a decision."

"What decision?"

He glanced at the icy pale girl. "Stay and fight or flee for their lives."

…

The Great Hall was filled with uncertain whispers as students gathered. Students from the Gryffindor holiday party arrived in various states of intoxication, but they quickly sobered up at the sight of Professor McGonagall standing on the podium Dumbledore usually stood on.

"What's going on?" Marlene asked. "I don't understand why we're all here. Were we that loud?"

"No. At least I don't think so?" Mary whispered. "Where is Lily? And Lyana? They've been gone too long. Did they get caught bringing alcohol? Is that why McGonagall called us here?"

"No," Alice shook her head. "Look. The Slytherins are here too. Something's happened."

"Ahem," McGonagall cleared her throat. "Students, I'm sorry for interrupting your weekend affairs, however, I'm afraid there has been a most egregious event today at Hogsmeade village."

"Hogsmeade?" The girls whispered synchronously.

"As many of you know, our world is currently under attack by those who believe that some of us don't belong here. Tonight, those people attacked Hogsmeade Village despite knowing there are students there. We have lost a very special soul tonight," McGonagall paused, glancing at the Gryffindor girls. Their unified look of dread caused an even deeper ache in her chest. She pursed her lips, then cleared her throat to compose herself. "Lyana Pearson was a student who exemplified excellence, kindness, friendship, and vigour for life."

"No!" The Gryffindor girls cried. Mary's knees buckled, as she dropped to the floor. Marlene turned white as a sheet while Alice covered her face with her hands to try and contain her horror.

"To those who were close to her, you may go and visit her in the Hospital Wing, however, there will be an official ceremony once the Aurors have finished their investigation."

Before McGonagall had even finished her sentence, Alice, Mary, and Marlene were already running out the door. The Head of the Gryffindors watched with a heaviness in her heart as the girls rushed out, tears dripping down their faces.

"Until we can secure the village, all Hogsmeade trips will be closed from now on. All of the access to the village will be blocked or guarded. Any students attempting to leave the castle without supervision will be punished."

The students started whispering to each other.

"Enough! There is no discussion! Just…just please don't go to the village. It is for your own safety."

However, the grumbles and whispers did not stop.

"You may all go back to your dorms. Now."

…

"Lyana!" The Hospital Wing's doors swung open revealing three tearful Gryffindor girls. There was a small crowd in the corner of the Hospital Wing consisting of the Marauders, some Aurors, and Hogwarts staff. However, in the center of the crowd, a weeping Lily was holding Lyana Pearson's cold hand. James stood behind her like a pillar of support, squeezing her shoulder whenever another sob overwhelmed her.

She couldn't bring herself to step away. She couldn't bring herself to even look away.

"Hey guys," Remus greeted them quietly, his voice sounding hoarse. His eyes were red and rimmed with tears. He opened the circle surrounding Lyana and allowed them their first sight of their friend.

Her curly hair was sprayed across the pillow as she lay completely still on the hospital cot.

Alice fell to the other side of the bed and wept over Lyana's body, whispering 'no's.

"I-I can't." Mary took fearful steps backwards, then turned around, unable to look at her friend. "This can't be real. I-I can't do this."

"Miss Curtis," Professor Sprout's soft voice was trying to be comforting, but Mary couldn't stand it.

"No! I saw h-her less than an… an hour ago! I talked to her! I-I laughed with her. A-and I… I— oh my god." her voice broke as she shook her head. "Oh my god."

The kind professor hugged her student tightly. Mary weakened in her grasp, stuttering in denial.

"Lyana," Marlene's voice trembled. "Oh my god, Lyana." She sounded and looked in disbelief. She glanced around the small crowd with a look of confusion. "She looks…but she's just… What happened?"

No one was willing to meet her eyes. No one wanted to answer.

"Well?!" She shouted. "You were there, weren't you?! What the fuck happened to my friend?!"

"It's my fault…" Lily whispered. "It's all my fault."

"What?"

"No, it's not." James denied, his voice firm and almost angry. It was the first time any of them had ever heard James take that tone with Lily. He's never been truly mad at Lily, no matter how much she seemed to yell at him or nag at him, but now he looked furious.

"It is not your fault, Lily. Stop saying that. It's those bastards' fault. Those fucking murderers who don't have an ounce of humanity in them, are the ones who are at fault. If I ever hear you say that kind of bullshit…" he didn't finish his sentence. It was an empty threat, but everyone could feel his anger at her self-blame.

"I'm very sorry to interrupt," one of the Aurors quietly spoke up, "but her parents are arriving soon. I'd like everyone except Professor McGonagall to step out until the parents are ready."

Reluctantly, everyone slowly shuffled their feet out of the Hospital Wing, only to be faced with Lyana's parents who rushed down the corridors of the hall followed by a crying Frank Longbottom. They looked as if they were running away from a fire, putting whatever clothes they had on in their sights before arriving. Mrs. Pearson wore a long knit skirt that wasn't facing the right way and a shawl thrown over her shoulders, with sandals on her feet despite the freezing temperatures outside. Mr. Pearson wore a ratty old t-shirt, pyjama pants, mismatching shoes, and a jacket with only one arm put through the hole. Both their eyes were rimmed red with tears, looking at them with wild eyes.

"Oh girls!" Mrs. Pearson rushed toward them, gripping Marlene's hand. She was at the front of the group, and in comparison, she looked more shocked rather than sad, so her parents clung to her. "I've heard something terrible."

"Mrs. Pearson, if you could please—"

"They keep saying our Ly is…" her voice trembled. "But that's not possible. S-she was at school. They're wrong. Right?"

Mary couldn't hold it together and let out a sob.

Lyana's parents glanced around the crowd in front of the Hospital Wing, none of them were able to meet their eyes.

"No," Mr. Pearson's face crumbled. "No."

The fall of a man, especially a big burly man like Mr. Pearson, was a uniquely tragic sight to witness. Anyone who knew Mr. Pearson knew that he was a man of very few words. His thick moustache was impeccably maintained along with his bushy brows. He often grunted as a response, rather than speaking a word. He never sat around the house when his daughter's friends came over to visit but opted to go to the kitchen to prepare some snacks or step outside and chop the wood to warm the house to make his daughter and guests comfortable.

"No!" He clutched the shoulder of his wife who stood pale and speechless. "Nooooo!"

No one could hold back their tears as they watched the 187cm man fall to the floor as he clung to his 153cm wife.

"Ciaran," the small woman clutched her husband's arm. "Get up. We need to see her. We have to be with her now. She needs us by her side. Get up, my love."

But the large man was inconsolable, so Meredith Pearson did something that shocked most of them. She ripped her husband's hand away from her and marched into the Hospital Wing, leaving her weeping husband behind.

"Meredith," McGonagall greeted her old classmate solemnly.

"Minerva." The short woman seemed to overpower the Minerva McGonagall even though she didn't stand as tall as she could nor even give the Scottish woman a glance. Mrs. Pearson stood by her daughter's bedside looking down at her still child. She raised a trembling hand and caressed her face.

"She's cold."

"I'm so sorry."

"Why…?" She warmed her cold hands and placed them on her daughter's cold cheeks. "No, I don't suppose it matters why it happened. The world is at war. Was it painless? Was she frightened?"

"It was quick and painless."

"Good," she linked her fingers through her daughter's stiff hands and rubbed them together to give her warmth. "Lyana hated pain, always such… a drama queen about even the smallest…smallest s-splin-t-ter." The strong woman's exterior broke as reality settled in. The warmth she was giving her daughter wasn't sustaining. Colour wasn't returning. Life had already fleeted.

The wails of a broken woman and man echoed through the halls of Hogwarts, and the old magical stone walls bounced the sounds of grief, ensuring that everyone in the castle heard of the tragedy that had occurred. That an innocent life had been lost, that her loved ones now held an unhealable wound for the remainder of their long and agonizing life.

…

"CRUCIO!"

Hermione woke with a gasp. Objects around her clattered to the floor, including her sofa and other heavy objects. She was in the Room of Requirement.

Two figures moved in the shadows. She quickly searched around her for her wand but panicked when she couldn't feel it anywhere.

"Easy," the two figures approached her and walked into the light. Regulus Black and Fredrick Avery approached her cautiously, glancing nervously at the previously dangerously flying objects.

"Black. Avery."

"You're in your room in the Room of Requirement," Avery told her. "Do you remember what happened?"

"I…I was duelling Bellatrix. Lily…did Lily get to the castle safe?"

Regulus nodded with reassurance.

"I remember Sev, he was…he helped me. I almost lost control."

"Fuck yeah you did," Avery scoffed. "You nearly blew up Hogsmeade if it hadn't been for Snape."

"Where is he?"

"Under interrogation with the Aurors."

"And I'm not?"

"Well, you fainted, and the Hospital Wing is currently being occupied with your sister's dead friend. Dumbledore ensured the Aurors that you wouldn't run away so they let you come here until you woke up."

"And what about Lu—"

"I flooed Malfoy to his estate as soon as the chaos ensued," Regulus told her. "We followed your plan as perfectly as we could. Avery confounded the barkeep at the Three Broomsticks to call the Aurors as soon as the Death Eaters arrived, I grabbed Lucius the moment I could. Severus protected several other students including Sirius while you were in your ring of fire of death."

"Although we couldn't see if our fake Avada worked thanks to your idiot brother's interruption."

The little quip made the room grow cold from Regulus's glare.

"Stop fighting," Hermione groaned as she got out of her bed. "No one saw you both, right? You're sure of it?"

The two nodded, "We were gone and hid out in your room before the Aurors arrived. No one saw us."

"Good work. You guys will have to stay here for a while longer as the surveillance settles but go back to your dorms and pretend you were there the entire time. If someone asks where you were, make sure they know not to question your whereabouts."

"Where are you going?" Avery asked as he helped her up. "You look like shite."

Hermione blinked. Was her face naked? She probably had no glamour charm on. She self-consciously covered her face. The room recognized her desire, and the room created a wall of mirrors.

She did look like shite, but she didn't look like she was dying. Severus: he was the only one who could have known to do this.

"The Hospital Wing. To pay my respects."

"Aren't you going to the Aurors to give your statement? Snape is probably under hot fire since they're probably grilling him."

"If he can't even take an interrogation from people who won't even use torture, then how does he expect to be a Death Eater spy?"

…

James cradled Lily in his arms, rocking her back and forth, kissing her forehead every once in a while when he felt her hiccup from distress.

He looked around at his group of friends sitting in front of the Hospital Wing, listening to the lamentation of Pearson's parents. They all looked so sad and barely held it together, but James had a terrible secret.

He was relieved.

He was so damn relieved that it had been Lyana and not Lily. And it felt terrible. Lyana was a good friend, she was his co-captain for the Gryffindor Quidditch team and a fellow teammate since 2nd year. He spent more hours with Lyana than he'd ever spent with Lily. In many ways, they were closer friends, yet he was relieved.

The emotions of gratefulness that Lily was alive, the sorrow of losing a friend, and the guilt for valuing Lily's life above Lyana's killed him inside. On the outside it looked like he was comforting her, in reality, James was clinging to Lily because he realized how close he'd been to losing her tonight.

The sound of shoes clicking against the floor caused everyone to turn.

Hermione Evans stood there staring at the door which divided Lyana Pearson from everyone else.

"Why is everyone outside?"

"Hermion—"

"What are you doing here?" Lily stood up from James's grasp, glaring at her sister.

"To pay—"

"Your respects? How dare you? How DARE you! You made me leave her there! YOU MADE ME DITCH HER ON THE COLD GROUND AND YOU'RE TELLING ME YOU'RE HERE TO PAY YOUR RESPECTS?!"

"Yes."

Lily rushed toward her sister and pushed her hard enough for Hermione to fall. "Go away! Get out of here! You don't deserve to be here! You made me abandon her!"

Sirius rushed to her and helped her up from the floor.

"How dare you come here you…you MONSTER!"

If Hermione hadn't been in Sirius's arms, she would have fallen again.

Over the years of having sisters, Hermione grew to learn firsthand that sibling love was often not as loving as she previously imagined. However, it was not the first time she'd seen siblings fight with the intention of hurting one another. The Weasley children fought often, but many of their more 'public' fights were playful. On the rare occasion, behind closed doors, even hidden from the eyes of Hermione and Harry themselves, they'd have fights so explosive and hurtful that the air around them was stifling.

Lily knew exactly what she needed to say to hurt Hermione. To affect the maximum damage. It was a mere reaction to the hurt, grief, and guilt she was feeling inside, and she knew it, but she didn't care. She wanted to hurt her because she could still feel the cold draft in her arms when Remus forcibly ripped Lyana out of her arms due to Hermione's orders. The unbearable sight and feeling of leaving one of her closest friends behind, a friend that had died in her place.

So Lily used her knowledge of her sister. She'd seen her Boggart, her nightmares, her insecurities, and much more. Lily knew that that word was almost taboo around Hermione, which was why she'd used it.

The damage was sickeningly satisfying, but only for a split second. True and genuine hurt spread across Hermione's face and the satisfaction quickly soured into deep regret, but Lily couldn't back down. She'd spit out the taboo word and there was no way to shove it back down her throat. To apologize now would seem like she wasn't furious with Hermione. She couldn't back down. She couldn't apologize.

"Hey!" Sirius's glare was so terrifying that Lily had to suppress the instinct to flinch away. "APOLOGIZE! APOLOGIZE TO YOUR SISTER NOW!"

"No! You weren't there, Black! You don't know what she made me do! She made me leave Lyana there, all alone! If it had been James or Remus or Peter, would you have left them? No! Because you value your friendships! Unlike, som—"

"I VALUE YOUR LIFE!" Her voice echoed through the hall. "I value your living, breathing life! You can call me whatever the fuck you want, you can call me a monster, a murderer, a fucking psychopath, I don't give two slivers of a shit because I would do the same thing all over again. To. Save. Your. Ungrateful. FUCKING. LIFE."

Hermione breathed heavily, trying to control her fury. She pushed Sirius away, distancing herself from all the stares she was receiving.

"I saved your life tonight. I saved all your fucking lives tonight, and not one of you helped. In fact, some of you nearly ruined everything and got yourselves killed, but I SAVED you. So if you're going to blame someone, don't blame me for being able to make the hard decisions that saved your incompetent fucking lives, blame yourselves for being ignorant to the war that's brewing right under your noses, blame your own powerlessness to save your friend, and blame the fuckers that actually killed her in cold blood, but don't you dare call me the monster."

…

Hermione couldn't sleep. She felt too wired to sleep. Too angry and frustrated. Too…everything. Her mind was overwhelmed with feelings and thoughts about this and that, past and future, joy and loss, etc.

"I'm glad you called out my mom for her BS though. It was a long time coming." Harry sat on the railing of the quidditch stand, his hair and sweater blowing in the harsh winter winds, and the scent of his lemony detergent wafting into her nose.

"You're not mad that I screamed at your mom? I basically said that it was her fault that her friend died because she was too weak."

"Would you have been able to save Lyana if she was with you?"

"Who knows?"

"You would have been more vigilant, you would have been cautious and on guard because you're aware of the dangers in the world. You are a brilliant tactician and duelist with some of the sharpest honed instincts I've seen in a while. You would have saved her. At least I think so. I think I would have saved her too. Since we grew up doing this, preparing for the worst at any time, I mean." He sighed. He lifted his glasses off his nose and wiped his lenses before placing them back on his face. "They didn't grow up like this, so, naturally, they're not prepared, but they could have been if they wanted to. Especially my dad. Grandad is the head of the DMLE, there's no way he doesn't know how bad it is out there. Sirius is the same, his family is part of the dark side, but he made no attempts at preparing. I think it's partial denial, but partially because they believe that the adults will fix it. Your whole speech tonight just showed them that leaving it up to others won't work."

"I don't want them involved in the war. It's why I made the deal with Dumbledore."

"The war is involving them. All of them are targets one way or another and sadly the wizarding world isn't big enough for them to hide behind the backs of others. They need to prepare, whether they like it or not. Whether you like it or not."

"What exactly are you suggesting, Harry?"

…

Avery, Regulus, and Severus stood in the Quidditch pitch early in the morning, snickered at the group of shivering and trembling Gryffindors.

"Welcome to hell Gryffindors."