Just Fine:alchemy dream

A/N: This was originally intended to be a one-shot, but...I have the feeling that it needs something else. So I'm not sure if it will be updated or not at this point. I'd love to know what you think!

ETA: I should not write fanfiction because it comes true for me apparently. I need Riku. :(

Enjoy, and remember, reviews are love.

May Contain: Hints of SoraxKairi, SoraxRiku (that's slash, kiddos).

Summary: Hours after Sora and Kairi's official breakup, Riku's left with Sora to run damage control. Funny how body heat can heal the wounded.

"Hey."

The sun was just beginning to sink, infusing a bright, golden corona of light around Riku's head as he stared down at his bummed out best friend. Sora sat on the crooked wooden step in front of the drink shack he called a summer job, fiddling a little with his bright yellow cap and kicking at the gravel and sand with his bare toes. Riku felt his heart throb a little watching the sixteen year old boy look so down. Orange light lined his tan jaw as it clenched just a bit, sparkled off the tips of his long, bushy eyelashes.

"Hey," he replied, listening intently as Kairi pulled down the awning of the shop for the night, rearranging the chairs inside before leaving through the side door and locking up. She walked towards them, her face just as glum as Sora's, waved goodbye and offered Sora an affectionate rub on the head. Sora simply pursed his lips and continued staring towards the shore, his eyes fixated on the dazzling shimmer of waves. Riku scratched his head a little, uncomfortably, watching Kairi hop on her, no wait, Sora's bike, and ride off towards Oceanside Drive, towards home.

"You know she's making off with your bike, don't you?" Riku offered, not entirely sure what to say in this situation. Sora let out a weak grunt.

"Yeah, she got the bike. I didn't want her walking home in the dark alone, so..." he trailed off.

"Very noble of you," Riku said, laying his own bike down and moving to sit next to Sora on the step. "Guess you shoulda made out a prenup," he grinned. Sora offered a somewhat bitter smile, sliding a hand through his spiky brown hair.

"Listen, Sora. It's not like she didn't love you, it's just that...it wasn't working, maybe?" Riku said softly. It seemed like such an easy thing to say, and it didn't seem to comfort Sora one bit.

"Yeah, I know. But...being dumped just...sucks. It's hard. Everything reminds me of her. I don't even want to go home," Sora said, his voice thick and his throat tight. Riku half wanted to roll his eyes from the waves of emo roiling from Sora, but he kept his opinions to himself, eyes screwed up with sympathy as he watched a small tear make its way down Sora's face into the corner of his lips.

Emo or not, Sora should never cry. Ever.

He reached over, just as Sora wiped the tear away and sniffed wetly to pull the younger boy to lay his head on his shoulder. He moved his strong hand over Sora's arm soothingly, cocking his head to rest on top of Sora's. He had never thought about how small Sora was, how unusually good he felt like this.

"So don't," he said finally.

"What?"

"Don't go home. Stay at my place tonight, we can watch a movie, play some games, drink sugary, frothy girly coffee, whatever you want. 'S your night," Riku grinned, secretly thrilled. Sora laughed truthfully this time, standing up and sliding his feet into his sneakers giving each foot an extra kick at the toes for good measure. A Kairi-free night? Not exactly what he was hoping for, but yet, a night just chilling with Riku was a pretty good consolation prize.

"Fine, but I need to stop by my house and get something to wear," Sora said, waiting for Riku to get settled on the bike. Riku scooted forwards as far as he could on the seat so that Sora could stand on the foot pegs and lean forwards against him, bracing his hands on his shoulders. He tried to ignore the electricity he felt with Sora's body surrounding him.

"Don't worry about it. You can borrow some sweats or something. Let's just get something to drink and get home." Kicking them off, he turned around and headed in the opposite direction that Kairi had gone, Sora's warm breath in his ear as he hunched over his back holding on for dear life.

Riku pedaled like mad while Sora reached down to re-adjust the two dripping cups of steaming vanilla chai in each of his cargo pockets. When they had stopped for drinks (of the frothy, sugary and girly variety as promised), Riku had convinced them to take home some chai as well since he'd just gotten paid. Unfortunately, bikes didn't come equipped with cup-holders, and so Sora, being the one standing was forced to put the drinks in his pockets. And every time Riku took a sharp turn or hit a bump or stopped suddenly, he got a pocketful of hot chai running down his leg.

Riku really didn't need any more caffeine tonight.

"Riku, slow down. My leg's burning."

"I went insane for all the courage and tears and had forgotten how fierce it felt to flyyyyyy!" he sang, dramatically off key. Sora couldn't help the small grin that broke over his face as he looked down at his best friend, the seventeen year-old pedaling as fast as he could, his hips swaying with each push forwards. Riku was doing everything he could to make Sora feel better. Sora felt lucky. Well, until the wheel kissed another curb and Sora's pumpkin pants legs filled again. They'd be lucky to have anything left to drink when they got home.

Sora knew he'd really be thankful for this by Monday when he had to go back to work and play sweet with his now ex-girlfriend. It was hard to tell what went wrong. He'd been doing everything right, or so he'd thought. He'd bought her roses, and he really was getting better with kissing. Maybe he'd kissed too hard? He hadn't expected girls' lips to be so soft and give so easily. He hadn't expected to feel like he was kissing strawberry putty. Maybe he'd hurt her? Grossed her out? Maybe she didn't like it when he tried sticking his tongue in her mouth? Maybe she just didn't like him anymore.

But then...just maybe he was in denial that what he really wanted were kisses that were less lukewarm, soft and artificial. Maybe he wanted something harder, hotter. Something that tasted more like...

"Is the chai okay, Sora? We're almost there," Riku said, calling Sora from his thoughts. Sora squinted a little in the last lingering bits of sunlight that blurred his vision, seeing the porch lights of Riku's house in the near distance. The car was there, meaning Riku's mom was home. Sora suddenly hoped he wasn't imposing.

"What if it's not cool with your mom?"

"Oh, come on, Sora. You know ma's cool with you coming over whenever. How long have you been staying over again?" Riku joked. "At least since my folks split."

"Yeah, at least." Riku's mom had divorced his father when Riku was six on irreconcilable differences, the main difference involving that Riku's dad was a jackass. Riku's dad forbade Sora from coming over, fearing their close friendship was bad for Riku. After all, Sora's mom had less money than his, and Riku should have been making valentines for little girls, not for Sora. In the end, Riku's mom had decided he was a bad influence, and did her best to cut him from their life. Riku never talked a lot about it, but Sora knew Riku was happier for his absence in his life.

His body lurched forwards a little as Riku stopped, and he jumped down, his legs aching from standing and balancing so long. Riku sighed a little, reaching into his pockets and propping the bike against the tool shed. He fished out his house key and unlocked the two locks, welcomed home by the sight of his mom making pancakes. She pushed a few silvery blonde locks out of her matching aqua eyes and smiled, pleased to see Sora.

"Hey, mom. Sora's here."

"Well hi there, stranger! You haven't come to see me in a few weeks, I was wondering where you'd gone off to," she said cheerfully. She looked down to flip a bubbling cake, smiling. "But I figured you were off with Kairi, of course." Riku winced a little, sorry for Sora that he was reminded of her the moment he walked inside. But Sora stepped up bravely, unfastening his wet, sticky pockets for the drinks.

"We broke up today." Riku's mom sat the spatula down on the counter uncomfortably, looking at Sora with motherly eyes full of sympathy.

"Baby..." Sora waved dismissively.

"You can give me a pancake, and it'll be better. A pancake and a shower and I'll be just fine," he said, forcing a smile at her. She reached out and put her cool hand on his cheek.

"Okay. But Ri, you'd better take good care of him," she said, flipping three semi-burned pancakes onto a saucer for Sora to munch on. Sora bowed a little in thanks, and began shoving the food into his mouth. He hadn't realized how hungry he was, what after skipping his lunch break to mope around. Riku nodded gently, taking his own saucer and waving thanks to his mom as the pair traipsed upstairs to Riku's room.

By midnight, Riku and Sora had played two games of poker, watched thirty-seven minutes of Riku's favorite horror film (Sora had spent thirty-two of those clutching the edge of the leather sofa, so Riku had changed it to a PG-rated sci-fi thriller), and looked through every drawer of Riku's desk in search of a set of markers to make signs for a car wash to make some extra money so that Sora could quit his job at the drink stand. Riku had finally started yawning more frequently, coming down from his chai high, and was getting his shower. Sora continued poking and prodding through the drawers messily stuffed full of papers, absently pulling open the bottom right drawer. On top of the pile of books and paycheck stubs was a stack of college applications. Sora reached down, picking up the forms and scanning the information. They all stated his name, birth date, height, grade point average and STPA score. Riku's, of course, was high enough to go wherever he wanted. He'd surely get into his first choice next year. Sora was proud of him. For all of his gloating and assholery, he really was very intelligent and deserved this chance. He'd been through so much, just like Sora, and deserved a fighting chance at normalcy.

Of course, these things did nothing to console Sora after suffering the loss of his girlfriend. He had never really ever thought about what he'd do if his two best friends drifted away from him. Certainly, he had friends on every world. There was always Yuffie, Leon, Aerith...Donald and Goofy. They would always be there for Sora.

Somehow, the pain of Riku not being around was a thousand times worse than the pain of Kairi dumping him. His vision blurred a little as he shuffled through the admission forms, one that was more colorful than the rest catching his eye. But it wasn't an admission form at all.

In bright crayons was a clearly ancient drawing of three kids, all wearing sunglasses that were much too large for their big bubble heads, grinning and laughing out on the paopu island. One was very small with bright red hair and a lavender dress, even sporting pink lipstick. The next one was just a little bigger, with brown spiky hair. Sora smiled, knowing his hair anywhere. He wore some little red trunks, and was holding hands with a taller boy, not colored tan like the others, his shoulder length hair left white and outlined with a thick black crayon. He knew it was Riku, if not from the appearance then from the fact that he and Riku always held hands. The bottom right had a big scrawled signature in red. Riku, and in black pen, age 5. Why had Riku been looking at this old drawing? Why was it in his pile of college aps? Was he, deep down, as sad about things as Sora was?

Sora, selfishly, couldn't help but hope Riku was a little miserable.

"Oh, what am I saying," he said to himself, laughing. "I've got to have hope."

"Sora?" Riku said, pulling his towel closer around his waist as he came out of the steamy washroom. He hadn't noticed him stepping out of the shower. Sora's eyes slid over his friend from his spot on the rug, over the wet silver hair that clung to his shoulders and face, at the slight build of his body, over the muscles in his legs and his long feet. At the scar on his leg, a gift from Xemnas. Riku looked confused at Sora, glancing from the papers in his hands to his shaking lip.

Sora smiled as his chapped lips sucked in air, as a few droplets touched the stack of papers in his hands.

"E-everything we all worked so hard for. For K-Kairi, for her to be my girlfriend, for you to always be with me..." he blurted, looking back down at the drawing as he hunched over on the rug. Sora felt utterly selfish, but he couldn't stop the words. Riku blinked the shock from his eyes, barely holding up the towel before rushing over to Sora. He looked up underneath the shield of Sora's hair, pushing his bangs out of his eyes. Sora's red, wet eyes just blinked as he continued smiling. Riku's heart pounded in his chest, wondering what he should do. Did the breakup affect him that badly?

"Sora, what..." Riku asked lamely before Sora rolled over to lie on the floor, his arms clutching at himself. Riku looked around his room before crawling around to face his friend, lying down in front of him. His fingers ached and burned for contact as he reached out and hesitantly tucked his friend against his chest, petting the nape of his neck, feeling the incredibly soft fine hairs there. His heart stopped from the shock of everything as he held the boy, wrapping him in warmth. Maybe he just needed to cry it all out, maybe...he could do this for him. This was what best friends were for, wasn't it?

Do you really want him to be your 'best friend', Ri?

Riku opened his mouth to say something, but caught the words before they could dribble out.

Yes, I do, but...I want more.

The feeling of having Sora in his arms felt so perfect and illogical that he couldn't help wanting more. He was just as selfish as Sora was.

Sora eventually took his hands from between their bodies and pressed them against Riku's wet belly, pushing him back a little. Riku loosened his grip, looking into Sora's eyes as he wiped his nose.

"You got me all wet," Sora sniffled, trying to conjure that smile up once more. He'd just about given up on wanting a shower to remove all the sticky drink from his legs, and now just wanted to go to sleep. He thought maybe nothing worse could happen. He'd had a good, solid cry, had come down from the caffeine and knew that Riku would do anything to give him a good night's sleep tonight.

And then Riku kissed him.

Sora was so startled out of his element that he didn't even notice himself grabbing at Riku's slippery back. It was all so imperfect, so improper, kissing his half-naked best friend, permitting this kiss that was so different from the ones he was used to with Kairi; rough, hard, hot kisses that tasted more like vanilla chai than artificial flavoring. He was even more surprised that he wasn't entirely adverse to this feeling. He closed his eyes for just a moment, trying desperately to log all of the sensations in his body before separating with a forceful, wet pop that left their breath ghosting over each others' lips.

"I can't," Sora said hurriedly. He couldn't even explain why he couldn't. Because Riku was a boy, because he'd just been dumped, because his emotions were still raw, because Riku was going away in the fall and never coming back, because...

Because he had waited his whole life for it, and now he didn't know how to cope.

Sora looked down, not brave enough to look Riku in the eyes. None of these reasons were good enough.

"Maybe I should go home. I...I should have gone home." Sora said softly, not wanting to do any more damage. He hated hurting people, especially Riku, who was only trying to help, after all. He nodded decisively, and turned as Riku started sliding on his black sweats.

Sora began walking down the stairs, Riku close behind, silence stifling them both. Riku wasn't entirely sure what to say. He was reeling in every direction, from the kiss, the rejection, the hope and the fear. He could only honor Sora's wish, walking him to the door, looking at how his eyelids drooped in the yellow porch light. He'd never seen the younger boy look so tired.

"Take my bike, I don't need it," Riku said coolly. Sora nodded, looking at the bike against the shed. "You'll be alright?" he asked softly.

"Yeah, I just need to get some sleep. I think you do too," the brunet said. He clutched his hooded shirt around his body closer, shivering in the damp night. Riku unzipped his black hoodie and tossed it at Sora.

"Take this too. Don't get sick."

Sora blushed a little, smiling. He shoved his arms through the time-softened sleeves, the feeling of being enveloped by Riku again almost overwhelming. He waved and started towards the bike, but turned on his heel, throwing himself into Riku's arms for a quick squeeze.

"Thanks," he whispered breathlessly, before skipping over and mounting Riku's yellow bike. Riku backed into the house through the storm door, watching until Sora disappeared down the road.

"He's a big boy," Riku said to himself, worried about Sora biking home at nearly one in the morning. "It's not that far."

Riku ached everywhere. His lips ached for warmth and sensation, his belly burned where Sora had pressed his palms in, and his ears rang with the sounds of his whispers. He was half angry with himself for letting things go so far, but he was also angry for them not going far enough.

It took a fair bit of reminding that it was unfair to Sora. Sora had just been dumped by his girlfriend, and would probably just be looking for someone to fill in the gaps she left behind. And as much as he loved his friend, he couldn't be the replacement Kairi. He could only be Riku, and he would wait until Sora wanted Riku and not Kairi.

He slid his sweats off, crawling in between the warm sheets of his unmade bed, enjoying the feeling of the fabric against the soft hairs on his legs. He wanted Sora to hurry and heal. And he'd do whatever it took to expedite the process. He'd hold him until he was cried out. He'd...

Ring.

Riku looked at his night stand, at the orange glowing phone. It took him a moment to register that he needed to answer before his mom woke up.

"...Hello?"

Silence.

"Hello?"

"...Ri..." Riku exhaled loudly, flopping back against the pillow.

"Sora." He practically breathed the name. "Are you alright?" He said, concerned when he heard the telltale sounds of muffled cries. He was suddenly very irritated at Kairi, reducing his best friend to such pain. "Is there anything I can do?"

"I want to talk," Sora said softly, insecurely. He gathered a little more confidence, whispering louder this time. "I want to come over."

"Sora, it's two in the morning. Your mom would crap a rainbow," Riku warned. He heard a loud sigh. Riku grinned a little, knowing what this meant. Sora's mind was already set.

"I think she'd understand. I'd rather be depressed with you than alone." There was a moment of silence before Riku spoke again.

"Okay. I'll meet you half way." And he hung up, heart racing in his chest.

Riku tapped his foot nervously against the tree at the intersection, perking up as his tired eyes noticed Sora pulling to the intersection on Riku's bike. He swerved a little, exposing how sleepy he was.

"I brought your bike back," Sora said. Riku nodded, speeding up his pace walking alongside Sora to compensate for their different modes of transportation. They traveled in silence, with the exception of Riku mocking Sora's incessant yawning. But even then, after a while Riku started yawning just as much and had no energy to mock his friend anymore.

Quietly, Riku opened the door, letting Sora walk in ahead of him before shutting it as softly as possible. They climbed the stairs once more, almost crawling, before slipping into Riku's bedroom. Outside, they could hear the early morning elepaio birds singing softly, the waves crashing gently against the shore a mile away. Warm, fragrant humid air crept in through the crack in the window.

"You can borrow some pjs if you want," Riku said softly through a yawn. He pulled his covers back, placing the pillows so that they could sleep. Smoothing one more hand over the sheets, he turned to find Sora already curled up on the floor next to his shoes facing the door.

"And...you don't have to sleep on the floor, either," he said, a little sadly. "I thought you wanted to talk."

"I wanna talk tomorrow," the breathing lump said, adjusting his body to be more comfortable on the wooden floor. Riku strode over to him, using the last of his strength to pick Sora up roughly, tossing him onto the bed.

"You're not sleeping on the floor. You'll get sick. I'll sleep downstairs if it makes you feel better," Riku said, grouchily.

"Riku, you're such a mother hen," Sora smiled, tugging on the older boy's hand. Riku blinked a little, cautiously sliding under the blankets and pulling the warm covers over both of their bodies. It took them a moment to get comfortable, but once the movement stopped, Sora's eyes closed, extremely comfortable and warm.

Full of pain, but loved.

Riku let his eyes drink in the glowing bronze of his skin, the dusting of lashes, the quick breathing. He felt the sublime kick of Sora's feet against his, his heart spiraling every time a long toenail scraped the top of his foot. In time, Sora's breathing slowed, lulling Riku into much needed sleep. For now, Sora's tears had stopped. He'd still have to wait. But waiting was easier with Sora by his side, with his comfortable warmth against his side. He didn't know how, or why, or when it happened, but he believed in destiny. He believed this was a first step. An important step. Healing, for Sora and Riku.

Things would be just fine.

I think

God will give you someone,
Much better than me, trust me
Your life will be okay,

It will be alright.
You'll be just fine.

End.

Lyrics from Chris Brown "Just Fine".