Author's Note: Ta-da! The last chapter! But don't fret too much. It's not the end. There is still the epilogue. Two hints to the ending: I don't believe in happy endings. However, I also don't believe in ending a story predictably. Think about it.
Chapter 30 (Catharsis)
"Sohma Kita." the principal read from his podium, his monotonous voice amplified by the sound system with its speakers placed strategically around the fields so everyone could hear.
Kita ascended the stairs of the platform, set up on the lawn for the outside ceremony. She gave a quick glance into the audience past the many weepy parents until she saw her crew clapping loudly. Shigure, Kureno, Haru, and Momiji had come to witness this monumental event. Hatori had wanted to go also but someone had to stay with Akito at the hospital and he took that position so Kureno could go instead. Kita couldn't help but laugh when she caught sight of Momiji standing on his chair cheering while Haru tried to coax him down.
She then glanced at her classmates, most of whom were simply clapping politely as they did for everyone else. Raidon and Hoshiko on the other hand were cheering like Momiji and irritating everyone sitting in the near vicinity.
Kita smiled at both groups and walked proudly across the stage to shake the many hands of the various contributors to her education and to finally acquire that all-important piece of paper that certified her completion of high school. Once her hands touched her diploma, however, she felt something was missing. She wasn't filled with a great sense of accomplishment and especially not a sense of freedom. She was still trapped in her mental and physical cage. But she was certainly working her way out of the mental one. The physical one however..
When the ceremony was over, the students left their seats to go find their parents or, in Kita's case, their family. Hoshiko and Raidon went with her since Hoshi's mom, who had actually taken time off of work to be there, was deep in conversation with Rai's parents and they decided not to interrupt them.
"Stand together you three. I'm going to take a picture." said Shigure, walking over to them and pulling out Kita's digital camera that she had told him to use during the ceremony. They all held up their diplomas and, in Raidon's case, an award for graduating with the second highest marks in the class that he acquired due to his neurotic parents, and grinned like it was the best day of their lives.
Shigure pushed the shutter button down and then handed the camera to Kita who brought it up on the little display screen.
"I'm going to want a copy of that one." Raidon said as they all viewed the picture.
"Me too!" exclaimed Hoshi, snatching the camera away from her to get a better look.
"We'll give you guys some time to say good-bye." Hatsuharu said smiling. He motioned to the rest of them to leave. Kita had already told them that she planned on walking back to the hospital by herself anyway.
Once the Sohmas had gotten out of earshot, Hoshi pulled both Kita and Raidon into a suffocating hug only acceptable among the closest of friends.
"Now don't you two forget me when you're off studying your brains out! Come and see me on your vacations and such, okay?" Hoshi said, giving Kita her camera back.
"Yes, we will. We'll all spend time together." Rai said. "Right, Kita?"
"Yes, of course." she answered, surprising herself with how confident she sounded.
"Okay, good." Hoshi declared, as tears started to pour from her honey eyes. "Call often. I will be calling you two whenever I'm bored." She looked over Kita's shoulder and saw her mom tapping her foot impatiently. "I have to go now. My mom looks pretty pissed that I didn't come sooner. Bye guys. I love you!"
"Bye." Rai and Kita said, waving to her as she walked across the field.
"Well Rai, I must be off too." Kita announced, swinging her arms back and forth.
"Alright. See you, Kita." Raidon said smiling.
"Bye." she said, waving as she calmly walked away, not a single tear falling because she knew she would see them, probably even sooner than she expected.
She walked down the well-known street, a peculiar sight in her uniform with the pleats swishing around her thighs. Yes, I will miss this feeling, she concluded. The last time I'll wear this uniform, the last time I'll go to that school, and the last time I'll know the safety of routine.
She took the same path she had taken many times with Hatsuharu and Momiji when they would share stories and make each other laugh. That same path however, did not lead to the hospital. It led to the main house.
She pushed open the door to the Sohma gates and started walking 'home', not really paying attention to her surroundings which she instantly knew was a bad idea when she heard a little girl squeal in pain.
Kita looked down in front of her to see a girl of about twelve or thirteen with rusty, orange-colored hair and big yellow-orange eyes.
"Oh, I'm sorry!" Kita said, bending down to meet her eye. "Are you hurt?" she asked.
"No." a pitiful, quiet voice answered. The girl looked down at the ground like she was embarrassed to get bumped into and for once, Kita didn't run away embarrassed even if she did feel stupid and careless.
"Okay. Uh, good." Kita said, eyeing the girl. The girl's hair was familiar to Kita somehow. That odd color...her mother! Her mother had the exact same hair color as this girl! "What is your name?" she asked curiously.
"Kisa!" someone shouted from behind them. They turned around and saw Hiro running towards them.
"Hello, Hiro." Kisa said shyly as the boy stood next to her protectively. So this is his little girlfriend, Kita thought to herself.
Kita smiled at her. "You know what, Kisa? My mother was the tiger before you. She had the same pretty hair as you too."
Kisa smiled and Hiro slipped his hand into hers.
"You two have fun." Kita said, walking towards the main house. Behind her she could hear Kisa say, "I like her. She's nice," and Hiro respond with, "Yeah. I guess she can be cool sometimes."
She entered the main house, almost in awe of the vacancy. None of the servants were on duty and the usual characters who frequently strolled in and out throughout the day were all at the hospital, awaiting Akito's discharge that evening at nine.
She walked down the hallway and entered her room, her supposedly temporary room. Wasting no time, she pulled her suitcase from under her bed and started filling it with her things: her books, her CDs, her movies, her clothes. She even took the yukata, the kimono, and the black corset dress she never got a chance to wear from her closet and packed them too. When she had packed everything, she realized that she was leaving with a lot more than she came with. Her suitcase was practically bursting at the seams but when she had arrived, it was only about halfway full.
She left behind all the books and bedding that were already there before she moved in. She never got clarification on whether or not they actually belonged to her so it didn't feel right to take them. Then as her final act in the main house, she picked up a piece of paper and a pen and scribbled a note, now very aware of the clacking sound of the band of her engagement ring hitting the pen as she wrote. She folded the note in half and put it next to the vase of tiger lilies so that it was conspicuous to anyone who entered.
As she took a last look around the room, she felt tears run down her cheeks. It's for the best, she told herself. I have to do it or I will probably regret it for the rest of my life.
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Akito got out of Hatori's car and stormed up the steps of the main house. Where the hell is Kita, he thought, as he walked down the hall.
"Kita!" he shouted forcefully. No answer.
He opened the door to her room and stopped dead in his tracks. The room was empty, absent of all of her belongings. All that remained were the furniture, a few books, and the vase of flowers. Shocked and angry, he entered the room, taking in all the blank spaces in her bookshelf, the lack of personality, the shear emptiness of what was once Kita's place in his house.
Then he saw the note, folded in half with his name on the outside. He picked it up and read it slowly, taking in every word as if he was slowly having daggers pushed into him.
When he finished, he tossed the paper away, picked up the blue mosaic vase and, with a barbaric sound of anger, smashed it on the ground spending shards of glass all over the floor, a few of which cut into his foot, adding blood to the equation. The water in the vase trickled down the wood panels, eventually touching a side of the note, causing the ink to smudge. Akito stepped on the tiger lilies, coating them with blood and crushing them against the ground until all the petals had been torn off and squished into a creamy pulp, creating a macabre mess befitting of his emotions.
And with that, he retired to his room for a little meeting with his long-time friend/enemy, the hidden knife.
The crimson water continued to destroy the note, until Kita's last words were completely gone, never to be seen by another person.
Dear Akito,
Although you will inevitably disagree with me on my decision, I have decided to leave Sohma house in favor of attending a university. I did not propose the idea to you because I knew you would say no and use every resource in your power to prevent me from doing so. But this is just something I must do.
You probably hate me by now and you can tell everyone else whatever you want about why I'm gone. I don't care. Just don't think that because I have left, I no longer have feelings for you. On the contrary, I love you more than I ever thought possible and I will continue to love you, even in my absence. I'm so sorry that I left you and the thought is terrifying to me that you may die before I get a chance to tell you so face-to-face. I know I'm asking a lot, but please try to understand.
- Kita