I HOPE YOU DANCE-Ashley

I hope you never lose your sense of wonder,
You get your fill to eat but always keep that hunger,
May you never take one single breath for granted,
God forbid love ever leave you empty handed,
I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean,
Whenever one door closes I hope one more opens,
Promise me that you'll give faith a fighting chance,
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance.

Jimmy and I sat in the audience watching all our friends cross the stage and move their tassels from left to right. He should've been up there…I should've been up there…Craig and Spinner should've been up there...hell, even Jay should've.

I hope you dance... I hope you dance...

But we weren't Jimmy didn't have the credits because of all the physical therapy from getting shot by Rick back in grade 11, Spinner wasn't because he told Ms. H about his part in the paint and feathers prank and got expelled, only to be re-admitted this year, but a year behind everyone, Craig wasn't because he was off in Vancouver recording his solo CD, he might've been there earlier if he hadn't dropped the demo for me...and our disastrous second try at a relationship, Jay wasn't because he was also expelled for the paint and feathers prank on Rick, but he never did summer school, or try to get back in this year.

I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance,
Never settle for the path of least resistance,

And me…I took a year off, went to London when things around here became too much for me to handle. I took the easy way out, all because I thought I had it hard.

Livin' might mean takin' chances, but they're worth takin',
Lovin' might be a mistake, but it's worth makin',
Don't let some Hell bent heart leave you bitter,

I thought getting away from Degrassi would erase all the pain this place had brought me… finding out my dad was gay, taking E, cheating on Jimmy with Sean, having Craig cheat on me with Manny Santos, finding out Manny got pregnant by Craig, getting back together with Craig only to find out he's bi-polar, I promised to stick by him…but watching over him, being afraid of what might happen if I do one little thing, it was too much, so I left. I thought about my reason for leaving while I spent my year in England. I was a coward.

If you come close to sellin' out reconsider,
Give the heavens above more than just a passing glance,
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance.

Ellie survived having an alcoholic mom, her dad being on a tour of duty, getting therapy for cutting, and having her boyfriend leave her with the apartment which she couldn't afford. Alex suffered having her mom's boyfriends beat her, and then not knowing when she was going to have a roof over her head at night, Jay who might've been the only person she trusted at the time serial cheated on her, and on top of that gave her gonorrhea, and finding out she was a lesbian. Marco hid himself from everyone for a year until he finally came out, got beat up, and basically had his dad disown him from what Ellie told me. And Paige, she got raped, lost her trial, broke up with Spinner…the one guy she could really trust…because he and Craig got in a fight about Manny, in front of her…while she broke up with Spinner, she broke her own heart and cried about it to me every night for a few months…she dated a teacher who left her at the beginning of the summer and when he came back, gave her weed, and experimented with Alex.

I hope you dance... I hope you dance.
I hope you dance... I hope you dance.

Jimmy was shot…he's now paralyzed for life, Hazel dumped him because she thought something was going on with him and Ellie, when he realized that he did like Ellie and asked her out, she turned him down because she liked someone else…and while the relationship issue isn't that bad, the fact is he was shot, and while he wasn't standing in front of me in a cap and gown, it's only because of the shooting or else he too would be up there. And Craig, even though he really hurt me, he had it a million times worse. His mom died, his dad beat him, he moved out and lives with his step-dad, Joey, when he tried to talk to his dad again, he was hit and then his dad got in a car accident and died, he was dumped by both me and Manny only seconds apart, Manny got an abortion and he lost his child, he had me be horrible to him all of grade 10, blew off recording a demo CD to be with me, found out he was bi-polar, I left him and caused him to stop taking his meds and have an episode which consisted of him running away, getting beat up, and getting his guitar stolen. He too would've been graduating if he wasn't becoming a rock star.

(Time is a wheel in constant motion always rolling us along,
Tell me who wants to look back on their years
and wonder where those years have gone.)

Craig came back. We waved and smiled at each other, it brought back memories, but then I saw how happy he was with Manny…and as weird as it sounds, I wasn't jealous. I was happy for him. For the first time in a while Craig was happy. He didn't look sad, or confused, or helpless. He had this joy in his eyes and a big smile with Manny that I never saw before. I was happy for him.

I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean,
Whenever one door closes I hope one more opens,
Promise me that you'll give faith a fighting chance,
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance.

Jimmy and I decided to give our relationship another try, after all, third times a charm.

Dance... I hope you dance.
I hope you dance... I hope you dance.
I hope you dance... I hope you dance..

So we stood at the steps of the school, watching our friends toss their caps in the air…and I cried…this was goodbye…

(Time is a wheel in constant motion always rolling us along,
Tell me who wants to look back on their years
and wonder where those years have gone.)


Yeah, I know this is kinda bad, and I'll most likely come back and re-write it. But I'm not really an Ashley fan, so it's hard for me to write in Ashley's thoughts. R&R

I HOPE YOU DANCE belongs to Lee Ann Womack