Author's Note: So this is the second chapter….I hope you like it. Review, please!
(I wanted to thank Morgen86 for her review….I'd really appreciate your suggests about the phrasing issues, thank you so much!)
Chapter 2: There's something about Meredith
Meredith hadn't slept at all that night. She had tried hard, but unsuccessful ….her mind kept coming back to Derek and she became feeling guiltier than ever…..maybe if she regretted last night it would be easier, but she didn't, so the guilty she felt was probably her punishment…..an atrocious punishment. She was ready to go at work, but before leaving the house she checked on Izzie. She was sleeping in her beautiful prom dress, her face dirty of mascara because of all the crying and Alex was asleep too, in an uncomfortable chair. He was been near Izzie all night. Meredith tried to wake him up gently
- Alex? Alex it's late…you should get ready or you'll miss the round-
Alex moaned for a while, then he opened his eyes – Meredith?-
- Yes. You've fallen asleep last night-
- What time is it?-
- 5 a.m.-
- Crap, it's really late-
- Don't worry, Bailey will understand. I have to go now, see you later-
- Ok-
Meredith left the house very quickly…she didn't want to come across to George and Callie….she had seen her and Derek after that "thing" last night and she couldn't handle people's judgements right now. She had to think about what saying to Finn that night and most importantly, of how avoid Derek….she couldn't talk to him, not so soon.
Meredith was lucky until afternoon. Unbelievably, she had been able to avoid both Derek and Addison...luckily, that day she was working on a case with Bailey.
She was waiting for the elevator, ready to run away if Derek was in there. When the elevator arrived was full of people, but no sign of Derek so Meredith went in. At the 4th floor, everybody went out, or at least Meredith thought so.
- Hi- said a voice behind her. Meredith jumped and turned back: it was Derek. Crap. She hadn't realized he was in there.
- Hi- She wished the elevator would have already arrived. Derek went closer to her but she stepped back immediately.
- What? Are you afraid of me?- he asked with that smirk she both loved and hate so much.
- Don't be stupid, of course that I'm not afraid of you….but I think it would be better if we weren't so close- she said trying to avoid his gaze….oh crap, he was giving her "their look"…..she couldn't resist that look.
- Why aren't you looking at me?- .She didn't answer
- Look at me, Meredith- he leaned to her and lifted her chin so that he could look into her eyes.
- Don't….please, Derek, we can't do this….it's wrong, it's totally wrong-
- We need to talk, Mere-
- No, we don't. We just have to forget what have happened last night-
- I can't forget….I don't want to forget-
- You don't have a choice…you're married, Derek. What happened between us was a….was a mistake- her voice died down when she said the last word….her heart was screaming that it hadn't been a mistake, but she couldn't listen to her heart right now…..she had to do the right thing.
- No, it wasn't a mistake…..no, it wasn't at all- Derek seemed not to care what Meredith was saying
- Derek!-
-No, Meredith, listen to me: it wasn't a mistake. It's been the first time since Addison showed up that I felt good, happy…..so happy that I would like to yell it to the entirely world…..and I know, I feel that you felt the same way. So, don't say that it was a mistake, because I don't believe you-
Meredith's heart jumped to her throat. She just wanted to kiss him and keep him close.
Unfortunately that perfect moment was interrupt when elevator's doors opened. Meredith went out without saying a word. She thought….she almost hoped that Derek would have followed her, but he didn't.
After his shift, Derek went to Joe's bar.
He didn't know what to do with Meredith….That morning he went at work wanting to tell her about his separation with Addison immediately. But she had kept avoiding him, and when they had finally found each other in the elevator, he had felt it wasn't the right moment to tell her what had happened with Addison. So she was still with Finn and he was alone at Joe's. Perfect.
- Hey man, what do you want?- asked Joe
- Tequila- tequila reminded him of Meredith
- Problems with Meredith?-
- How do you know?-
- I know everything…. And you don't drink tequila so often-
- Yeah, it's Meredith…..it's always her- answered Derek and then he let the tequila slide down his throat. – Another shot –
- You know, you seem her right know. It's Meredith the one who shows up here and get drunk with tequila when she has problems with you –
- Does she do it very often?-
- Yeah…pretty much. You broke her heart dude…this is the only way she knows not to think of you for a while –
- I'm a jerk…..I'm really a jerk-
- Yeah, I guess you are sometimes-
Derek kept drinking until he started feel drunk.
- Joe, I want to ask you something, and I want you to be completely honest-
- I'm always honest with drunk guys-
- Fine….do you think Meredith love Finn? Because I think she loves me….I feel that she loves me. But I've been an ass with her lately and I know she likes Finn and…..the point is…..the point is I'm scared….what if I lost her forever?-
- First of all that was your last shot of tequila….you're drunk enough. And about Meredith….I think she's better since Finn, but I'm sure she still loves you. I've heard that girl talk about you for months….she'll never stop loving you. But this isn't good for her, at least not until you're married-
- I'm not married anymore…..I mean, I am, but not for long. Addison and I are separated-
- What? It's great! Why are you sitting here drunk instead of going to her and telling her the news?-
- Because I'm a jerk- Derek said letting his head fall between his hands
- You're a very sad drunk guy tonight. I'm calling you a cab-
Derek closed his eyes…he felt sick, he had drunk too much….he was unable to think, but Meredith kept being in his mind…..she was always in his mind, no matter what.
Finn had brought Meredith out for dinner that night. She wasn't in the mood, but Finn had insisted so much…. He thought she needed going out to distract herself from all the work issues.
He had taken her home and Meredith wanted to talk to him immediately….she couldn't stand that situation anymore.
-Finn we have to talk- she finally said
- Now?-
- Now-
- Ok, I'm listening to you- He was smiling…..why was he smiling? It made everything herder to her….she didn't want to break his heart….but she was going to. She hated herself so much right now!
- Finn, this isn't simple….this isn't simple at all. I did a terrible thing and I'll perfectly understand if you hate me after I'll tell you what I did-
- Meredith, calm down, what's wrong?-
- Don't be so sweet with me…I don't deserve it-
- Meredith…?-
- I slept with Derek during the prom- she said fast.
Finn's face turned darker than ever….Meredith wanted to run away, but she couldn't act like a coward right now.
- I know what you're thinking…..I'm a dirty mistress….I know that. But the thing is….I love him, I love him more than anyone. Not that this is an excuse….-
- I knew he wasn't just a friend to you…..I knew- Finn managed to say.
- I didn't know he was married when we were dating…..he didn't tell me. Then Addison showed up….you can imagine what happened next. I tried to forget him….but it's useless…..I can't do it-
Finn didn't say anything, he just kept looking at her.
- Please, say something-
- What do you want me to say?-
- I don't know….everything you want, but say something-
- I feel stupid-
- What?-
- I feel stupid because I've known you for few weeks and now I feel so bad and jealous. I'd like to punch Derek Shepherd-
Meredith didn't expect him to say that…she knew Finn liked her, but apparently he liked her more that she had thought. – Aren't you mad at me?- she asked
- A bit-
- I didn't mean to hurt you-
- I know that-
- You deserve someone better that me-
- Meredith, you have made a mistake, but I still think you're great, I still like you-
- Are you saying that you want to be with me? Still?-
- I need some time, but yes, I'm saying this-
Meredith was sincerely shocked….what was she suppose to do now?
- You should go inside now….I'll call you, I promise-
- Finn have you listened to me? I slept with Derek, I said I still love him that I can't forget him, and you want to stay with me? This is crazy!-
- No, it isn't-
- Finn…-
- Meredith, Derek is married, you can't be with him anyway…..I know you love him but I can help you to go on with your life….I can do it-
- Why do you want to do this for me? Why are you so generous?-
- I'm not doing this just for you….but for me too. Since my wife died I had never felt this way about someone…..you're special, Meredith and I really want to try with you-
Meredith smiled at his words, then she leaned to him and kissed him soft. – Thank you Finn-
- You're welcome-
Meredith got off the car and while she was searching for the keys in her bag, she found herself think Maybe…